youngboldone

I didn't mean to violate any rules, but in this case, I thought my query did appeal to two different audiences. Did you have any advice to offer about my actual question?

(I recently posted this in The Deli, but thought it was appropriate to post here, too, so I could solicit advice from escorts and get their perspective.) I'm looking for some honest, constructive feedback to help me in this area. In a past thread I was outspoken in my belief that it's better to correspond back and forth first with an escort to get a feel for whether we are compatible before actually setting up an appointment. Many people told me that was the wrong approach and that it was better to set up an appointment and then work out the particulars. Maybe escorts prefer this approach because the reasoning is that clients are less likely to cancel if an appointment is already on the books? Here's the thing. I'm not looking to hire purely for a physical bang and then out the door. Don't get me wrong. The sex is important to me, but what I am primarily looking for is a boyfriend experience that leads to the sex. I want an honest, genuine connection, deep kissing, affection. It's virtually impossible to determine from an ad alone if the escort can deliver this. To know for certain requires a willingness to correspond and even talk briefly on the phone. I need some help with this, though, because lately I have had rotten luck both ways. I have gotten blocked twice by escorts now in the past three weeks. In the first scenario, I tried it my way. I contacted the escort, told him I was interested in his profile and wanted to talk about what I was looking for to see if we'd be compatible. Things were going along okay (I thought) for about 5-6 brief text messages back and forth. I was ready to take it to the next step, so I asked if he'd be willing to talk to me on the phone for a couple minutes so I could elaborate on the type of meeting I was looking for. Silence. After a day or two went by with no response, I found I'd been blocked. So I decided to try it the other way. I contacted an escort to let him know I liked his profile and offered a date and time to meet along with desired length of session (which was a guess on my part because I had no idea if there was any chemistry between us). He agreed to the time. He didn't ask me about what I wanted out of the session, what my interests or desires were...nothing. So I brought it up. We texted back and forth three times, and then he blocked me. To say I am frustrated is an understatement. Neither approach seems to be working. Many guys on here seem to handle booking with ease and effortlessness. So how detailed are you when you initially contact an escort? Is it not expected that the escort will take the lead in determining what you want to do during a session? It just seems like most escorts don't want to take even the littlest amount of time to find out anything about you, which seems wrong considering the amount of money they are being paid for their time. Truly puzzled, so any help is welcome. I am open to new ideas of how to do this. Thanks.

I'm looking for some honest, constructive feedback to help me in this area. In a past thread I was outspoken in my belief that it's better to correspond back and forth first with an escort to get a feel for whether we are compatible before actually setting up an appointment. Many people told me that was the wrong approach and that it was better to set up an appointment and then work out the particulars. Maybe escorts prefer this approach because the reasoning is that clients are less likely to cancel if an appointment is already on the books? Here's the thing. I'm not looking to hire purely for a physical bang and then out the door. Don't get me wrong. The sex is important to me, but what I am primarily looking for is a boyfriend experience that leads to the sex. I want an honest, genuine connection, deep kissing, affection. It's virtually impossible to determine from an ad alone if the escort can deliver this. To know for certain requires a willingness to correspond and even talk briefly on the phone. I need some help with this, though, because lately I have had rotten luck both ways. I have gotten blocked twice by escorts now in the past three weeks. In the first scenario, I tried it my way. I contacted the escort, told him I was interested in his profile and wanted to talk about what I was looking for to see if we'd be compatible. Things were going along okay (I thought) for about 5-6 brief text messages back and forth. I was ready to take it to the next step, so I asked if he'd be willing to talk to me on the phone for a couple minutes so I could elaborate on the type of meeting I was looking for. Silence. After a day or two went by with no response, I found I'd been blocked. So I decided to try it the other way. I contacted an escort to let him know I liked his profile and offered a date and time to meet along with desired length of session (which was a guess on my part because I had no idea if there was any chemistry between us). He agreed to the time. He didn't ask me about what I wanted out of the session, what my interests or desires were...nothing. So I brought it up. We texted back and forth three times, and then he blocked me. To say I am frustrated is an understatement. Neither approach seems to be working. Many guys on here seem to handle booking with ease and effortlessness. So how detailed are you when you initially contact an escort? Is it not expected that the escort will take the lead in determining what you want to do during a session? It just seems like most escorts don't want to take even the littlest amount of time to find out anything about you, which seems wrong considering the amount of money they are being paid for their time. Truly puzzled, so any help is welcome. I am open to new ideas of how to do this. Thanks.

I'm with you! Nothing is more off putting than an ad with misspellings, poor grammar, and incorrect or lack of punctuation. For me, those errors tell me something about the escort's personality, mindset, and attention to detail. If they care enough about crafting a legible ad, chances are good they will care enough to give the client a good experience.

That's exactly the vibe I was getting, and I followed my instinct and decided to pass. Sounds like I dodged a bullet. A shame because he really is a hot guy.

Thanks, Robster. If my budget can allow, I will try to make it this year. Have a bucket list trip to Australia and New Zealand coming up, though, so I may need to plan on attending next year instead.

Thanks, Beancounter. Yeah, I checked out the other threads, but they didn't yield much. I will check out his twitter.

https://rentmen.eu/AsherDevinXXX Any feedback on this guy? He's super hot, but I can't find any feedback or reviews on him. I don't like to hire blind. Hoping someone can tell me something about him.

EVdude, have you seen Asher Devin before? He's advertising as an escort on RM and is back in Columbus for a few days, but I can't seem to find any reviews on him. I'm really horny but trying to make rational decisions and not decisions governed by my small head.

Epigonos, your version of deviled eggs sounds delicious! I also use Dijon mustard, regular mustard, mayo, a sprinkle of sugar, and a heavy dollop of sweet pickle relish, and paprika to garnish.

Epigonos, my husband detests deviled eggs the same way you do. Anytime I prepare them for a potluck, he says the house reeks. I commend you for preparing so many when you don't enjoy them yourself. It's a lot of work (the peeling alone!).

Thanks for all the thoughtful replies. Having never attended, I don't know the meaning behind the deviled eggs comments (obviously an inside joke), however deviled eggs are one of my favorite foods, so that alone has me intrigued. I am shy around people I don't know, and I am a sentimental softy. I have strong opinions about things, yet I am the most non-assertive person you'll ever meet (not a great combination I know). So I recognize that I need to work on that assertiveness and develop a thicker skin at times. And I'm sure I've said things here that have probably offended others. Knowing what it's like to be on the receiving end, I am profoundly sorry if my words have ever emotionally harmed others. A lot of my reticence about attending stems from the fact that, even at 44, I am not a sexually confident person. Therefore, the thought of being in this kind of setting truly terrifies me. It brings back lots of unpleasant memories of being the wallflower at the bars/clubs that no one approached or talked to. But I don't want to limit myself on experiencing life, and these responses have me thinking I'd like to attend to see what it's like. The question now is whether my budget will allow that for 2018, also recognizing that the window of opportunity for getting a room is likely closing, if it already hasn't. I am taking a bucket list trip to Australia and New Zealand in February, so it may not be in the cards this year. Need to do some serious number crunching to see if I can make it happen.

When I first heard about this gathering a while back, I was intrigued and wanting to attend. I've also never been to PS and always wanted to visit. But since dipping my toe into the hiring waters last year and becoming more active on this forum, I have not received, shall we say, a warm welcome by many people. Some people have been downright nasty and condescending, and some have even gone so far to private message me with their nastiness. Keyboard courage I guess. Anyway, I was severely bullied in school and am still getting over the damage of that at 44. I don't need to put myself through more of that in person. There are a few really nice people here, which is why I stay and continue to post, but for the most part, this forum seems like a very exclusive club where, unless you're a seasoned, uninhibited, sex expert, you're not really welcome. Snark and sarcasm have their place, but they can be misinterpreted when you don't truly know who it is you're talking to. I prefer more genuine interaction. Based on the comments in this thread, it doesn't seem like that would be the vibe at this event. Hope everyone else attending has fun, though.

Jake Deckard - he will rock your world!

Would you mind PM'ing me after you meet? Based on what I've read about Victor as well as his thoughtful contributions to the forum, I'm pretty sure you're in for an amazing time. Enjoy, and have fun!

Trent, I do hope you will let us know how it goes for you. I'm hoping you have an amazing first experience. Is the guy you've selected Victor Powers?

Have been in contact with him a handful of times when he was in Cincinnati. Was looking to hire him as an escort because he's a damn hot daddy, but I've never followed through. He has always seemed "off" in communications. Every time, he has advertised for Columbus, but when I contact him he says he's actually in Cinci and sounds like it's a chore for him to come to Columbus. On all occasions, he has tried to get me to pay for at least half his hotel, and he even once made the comment, "Well, where should I stay in Columbus? Make sure it's a cheap hotel." I took a pass. I wasn't getting the vibe he would be focused on me as a client at all, especially since his rates were on the steep end.

Yes, I did, nycman. But I'm glad you're getting so much pleasure at my misery. You are a cruel human being.

I hope you have a great first experience no matter who you choose. My first time wasn't so great, and upon reflection I realize that it was partly due to me. So, lessons learned: communicate, communicate, communicate! Be very clear and explicit about your expectations for the session up front, and if something isn't happening during the session that you want to happen, speak up and ask. And above all, please play safe.

Why outcall with Luke instead of incall? Feel free to PM me. Thanks.

I am wondering whether they should be. I welcome discussion. Personally, I think it's a moral gray area.

GregM, I will also add that I recently kept an appointment with an escort who did reveal to me his poz status after I made an appointment with him. I went back and forth on that decision, but in the end, I knew it wasn't fair to the escort to back out on a standing appointment. I intended to pay him the full fee even if all we did was sit and talk for the two hours. He told me he was undetectable. Was he telling the truth? I don't know, but I figured if he was genuine and honest enough to tell me about his poz status in the first place, chances were pretty good he wasn't going to lie about that. I had loads of fear, but I went, and we had a wonderful time. We did everything but anal. I didn't feel comfortable doing that even with a condom. I didn't want to take the risk. To this day, I'm afraid I got infected from giving oral. Even though I know, statistically and factually speaking, the odds of contracting from precum are very low, there's still a nagging "What if?" in the back of my brain. When you are raised in a super strict religious household with a mother whose first response to your coming out was to cry and exclaim, "But you're going to die of AIDS!"....that tends to stick with you.

I didn't say that I assumed all clients are HIV negative, but again, the inverse holds true: if a client knows that they are poz, I believe they have a moral imperative to inform anyone they're considering having sex with so the other person can make an informed decision. As to the second part of your sentence, why WOULDN'T a client be concerned about an escort's HIV status? If you aren't interested in knowing that, then I would say you need to educate yourself. If everyone were more careful and cautious, the disease wouldn't still be spreading. And yes, I read several of the links. And yes, I feel more informed. And yes, the fear is still there. There will always be some fear surrounding this issue. After all, it's your life at stake. If you aren't at least a little fearful, I would say that's just willful ignorance.

And some to Columbus as well!