Oni Graves

Yeah I think about passion and chemistry works better than size.
also the position changes the game too. Personally as a top I don’t really care about the provider’s size, it’s even better if they are caged lol. But if they are much bigger than me it’s visually a lot of pressure……

TBH I don’t really need my bottom to be in control. It’s just performance anxiety and I easily got knocked out of the moment. The bottom being submissive consistently really helps me stay in the focus. I had like one or two successful encounters in Europe when they just simply enjoyed being my “man wife”or “good girl” for the night, but when I try to search for similar providers after being back I had no luck so far lol. That’s why I thought maybe asking for recommendations might raise the chance. BTW your description was quite on point, that’s really my favorite type.

I think you are right man. It has been a bad circle on repeat. My condition and lack of experience made some sessions awkward , the awkward sessions thickened my condition. I do have a decade of longings for a certain type, but maybe just get comfortable with experienced providers can be a good start.

Not to commandeer this thread but genuinely how does one figure this out? I feel like I knew but things shift - am I just into a lot?

As a 2-decade niceGuy escort, I can tell you your thinking is wrong.  We are paid, and it's not an act.  Both are true. 
 
It's genuine fun and passion that just happens to be paid.  (Ok, those providers who say "I love you" without being asked to, that's laying it on thick) What is getting in the way of it being a long term thing is not that we were/are acting, it's that we aren't an option because of our work and most of the time neither are you because "fill in the blank".
Don't "move on" by telling yourself it was an act.  What a horrible thing to do to yourself, and horrible way to think of him.  Rather, remind yourself that it was good, it is good, and it can not be for many very real reasons.  All those things are true and unchangeable.

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You should talk with Marco Napoli.  His home base is NYC now, but travels and I know CA was a location where he had connections/visits.  He is vers, however, really wants to know what you like and non-judgemental.  Really sweet guy & fun.  Good luck.
 
https://rent.men/MarcoNapoli#platinum

Yeah I think about passion and chemistry works better than size.
also the position changes the game too. Personally as a top I don’t really care about the provider’s size, it’s even better if they are caged lol. But if they are much bigger than me it’s visually a lot of pressure……

Good luck. Experienced guys will guide you. 

Yes. same here. So I get it. Love to play with power dynamics.
YOURS is somewhat complex but not rare. The problem (in MY opinion) is the word "sub". You want someone who likes getting ass fucked but is in control of the situation, almost dominant with a possible kinky feminine side. So I agree with the above suggestions to search for an older "power bottom" first. Your desire for a panty clad, daddy type is going to be a real needle in a haystack...but doesnt hurt to ask. 

https://rent.men/WillTantra is in Denver but travels.  He might fit the bill for you.  

As the author of the original post, you can go back and change the title to include the city... You will get much more helpful responses.  Click on the 3 dots in your original post, or ask a Moderator for assistance.

Cool cool, so just use “power bottom “ as a key word while searching? I’m gonna try it out now. Much appreciated! 

Hey, thanks for responding man. Almost lost hope there. Yeah I understand the requests are complex. I definitely have dominate side and my turn-one are the power dynamic, especially if the partner is a mature sub, doesn’t have to be BDSM but I just LOVE that type. But some trauma past and lack of experience made it quite hard to express all that. So it became a dead end, I’m happy to hire a provider that fits my needs to meet the fantasy, but just searching for “sub daddy bottom” never really shows any helpful results. That’s why I decided to seek help and see if anyone had good experience with certain providers before they can refer to me. Thanks again tho.

I’d suggest first finding a vers daddy type who appeals to you. I say vers because he needs to understand a top mindset. Then engage him in discussion about what you want. If he’s a good provider he’ll understand what you’re looking for. I find many clients don’t exactly know what they’re looking for - they can’t articulate it and often they don’t know it fully. It takes a bit of time (a few sessions) and some flexibility from me to help them. I’ve had guys change their minds on what role they think they are after a few sessions. It’s good to avoid being rigidly in a box. 

Cool cool, so just use “power bottom “ as a key word while searching? I’m gonna try it out now. Much appreciated! 

You’re looking for a “power bottom”. Several RM men advertise that service. 

Hey all, new member here, and need some suggestions.
My status is kinda awkward tbh, I'm a dom top without enough self-esteem to fill up his ego. Also I'm uncut with a sensitive tip, if you know you know, that can also make things awkward.
My type is mature bottoms that really know how to put themselves under their man and guide the top, verbal, lingrie and roleplay are all big plus. 
So I'm wondering if anyone has experience with submissive daddy providers like that, and where to find their page?
Prefer clean but also open-minded about it.
Thank you thank you