d.anders

I should have said sunburn sensitivity or skin cancer does not count. If I had any of these, I would never step foot in direct sunlight. I don't think these are the issues with Nathan Lane, and I have not heard he has ugly surgery scars, which I could also understand. I was simply thinking basic vanity. Would a gay man cover his wet body in a wet area simply because he doesn't want to show himself shirtless? I love swimming naked, so I can't imagine. I have seen videos in the Middle East where the men wear those baggy pants when they swim. It's weird to me, but I did not grow up in a hyper-religious society. A good reason to avoid dipping the toes into water wherever children are present. Now we're talking. LOL.

That did it! Now I need to rob a bank.

Are there any members here who would admit to wearing torso clothing when they enter a pool or hot-tub? Seeing Nathan Lane do it in Mid-Century Modern made me wonder if there are any gay guys who would actually do this.

Maybe not enough board members have seen it yet, but I'm surprised no one has mentioned Nathan Lane's refusal to do nudity. How weird was it to see Nathan Lane wearing a t-shirt in all the hot-tub scenes? Who among us would do that? (I'm going to ask in The Lounge.) I remember listening to Nathan do an interview many, many years ago, where he said he would never take off his clothes for a role. Seeing him in the hot-tub scenes reminded me of that interview. He definitely does not want to be seen in public shirtless. How bad could it be?

I'm still thinking about last night's episode, but I can't get beyond Mike White's choice of having Belinda, who believes Gary/Greg killed Tonya, accept an invite to his home, with her beloved son in tow. What loving mother would make this stupid choice?

It sure worked for me. Linda Lavin was terrific at throwing zingers and making a Maude face. She had millions of Broadway theater fans. That's my greatest fear, they're going to promote Pamela Adlon playing Mindy, and the show will go south for me.

I just wanted to say, this is a very thoughtful response. I'm assuming BFE stands for boy.friend.experience. You definitely exhibit this skill in your talented writing. There are a few statements that stand out for me: People evaluate looks all the time, especially gay men. You don't even have to visit the photo galleries here to experience the intensity. Evaluation is with us every day of our lives. Hello Grindr. There seems to be no escaping it, especially now in this Instagram age. Many of us have become socially wired to be insecure about our looks, especially as aging gay men. I applaud you for sharing your approach on how to rid us all of this hurtful scourge to our precious self-esteem. When I worked in corporate, we had code names for certain types of clients. Maybe someone should start a "Crazy" thread, where hopefully serious providers can share their honest definition of that word with us. List every detail that qualifies. The trouble is, one man's crazy can easily be distorted by an impatient, uncaring, non-professional. For example, I have 4 important (to me) questions that I usually ask. The provider may not realize it, but all my questions have to do with my personal health concerns, and nothing to do with sex. I often feel lucky if I get 1 answer, and some have branded me crazy for asking more than 1 question. LOL. This sentiment is very touching, and shows a lot of heart. I wish I knew more people in this life who had a lot of heart. Photos of my current naked body do scare me, because I remember just yesterday what I once looked like. I no longer "fear" the provider response, I've had to learn how to accept rejection. I prefer to accept rejection on my terms. I also don't want anyone feeling bad for me, because I have accepted my old age, and all the vane suffering that comes with it. I view acceptance as a triumph to be celebrated, not leaving anyone feeling bad. @DamizzonNYC, thanks a lot for offering such a great post.

Since they played the mother as having died, I doubt they would go the soap opera route and bring her back to life as a new actress. For the writers, I imagine it would be very awkward to pluck a woman from thin air and offer her Sybil's bedroom. For a creative, this is not a fun place to be. Cybil Shepard is way too pretty to have spawned the looks of a Nathan Lane. Much like Will & Grace, this show may not be fun viewing for every gay. However, I thought the previews sucked, and promoted possible doom. Once I started watching, the characters immediately grew on me, and many of the jokes had me laughing out loud.

No one should be sending photos from their last shoot with Annie Leibovitz. 🙂 The photos I send are awful quality, no face, and they are small in pixel size. They are worthless. They do provide enough visual information (where it's better than nothing or just words), and that's really all that matters. I once had a decent gym body. I no longer have that. I once had smooth skin. No longer. Funny thing is, my junk hasn't changed much, and many guys have told me it was attractive. So I put my best foot forward (and I have handsome feet). Most professional providers, yes. I wouldn't hold my breath on the non-pro types. I would say most of those are just looking for easy money, or sex that turns them on. Being cynical, if a supposed hottie is asking for a photo, it's a red flag that your age and appearance will matter for booking, or even a call back.

I did assume that. But how does one truly know intent? I suppose in the escort sense, discrimination would be very difficult to prove, and who among us would dare bring a case? LOL.

I know this probably doesn't apply here, but I wonder if there are actual legal restrictions or ramifications to asking for a photo, depending on the state. When I worked in corporate, we were not allowed to ask potential hires to submit a photo with a resume due to liability issues. I don't know if this liability issue still exists, but I wonder if there is a law covering the service sector. Can a beauty salon or massage spa ask for a customer photo before booking an appointment? My profile has it too, but I don't think they allow nudity. I don't like surprises, so I voluntarily offer a nude photo. If a provider has no desire to touch my body, I prefer to know about this before I lie on the table or pay for a service.

Hell no. If I had to show my body naked, my circle would be black. Lights off.

It is very interesting how they handled Lavin's death and completed the last episode of the season without her. Can't help but wonder about the future of this show. Will it survive without her? Can it survive without a strong, older, female character as part of the ensemble? I had forgotten how talented Lavin was. She has quite a history in show business, and her presence on this show gave it a lot of gravitas. It sure was nice to see Judd Hirsch and Rhea Perlman again. Lavin's character created an easy space to feature these older actors doing guest spots. I think many of us older gays would appreciate that nostalgia. Richard Kind was fabulous, too. This show is a great acting opportunity for talented men (and women) actors to play gay. I'm not a fan of Pamela Adlon. She is talented, but she burned me out in Californication and Louie. I would have preferred a different actress playing Mindy. I'm hearing from friends who are disappointed with Matt Bomer's performance. They are not getting his casting. He's far from Betty White, but I love the fact that he's channeling her. They did end up giving him blond highlights, and I think he's doing a terrific job. Definitely ready for Season 2. Will it happen? Will we have to wait 3 years?

Some guys have to learn the hard way that being kept may not be what it's cracked up to be. Relationships can be complicated when folks are near equals. The complications can increase when they are not. Not every man is equipped to lose his independence or willing to be controlled by another. These days, being kept seems like a dated concept. Very 70's. In NYC now, it's easier to get through TSA with a rifle then it is to secure a signed lease.

Just finished Episode 9 and I can't stop sobbing. God bless Linda Lavin.

I just Googled, "Are verbal agreements ever legally binding?" Several law sites had interesting responses. I would still try to find a lawyer and sue. Diddy has super-deep pockets.

The massage may not need to be kept secret. The risk is bringing home an STD from a stranger, and keeping that interaction a secret.

Sorry. If it wasn't an employment scenario, and the photographer was just there as a guest and solicited by chance, then it's difficult to see how any case could be made. But who knows how it affects the Diddy case? It all seems like more ammunition to me.

If someone powerful made a business agreement for sex, and that person backed out for whatever subjective reason, why not sue? I'm not a lawyer, but I will never take the bully's side in these situations. I always feel sorry for the workers who have to endure this shit, whether they choose to oblige or not.

The differences are obvious. However, it still comes down to someone in power, either by employment status or money or both, subjecting an employee or co-worker to perform sex for business gain.

I've read about several female model lawsuits involving famous straight photographers in a similar situation. Even though they did the deed, they won their lawsuits, or at least got a settlement. I'm not a lawyer, and I don't know the changes around #metoo or sex in the workplace. Maybe it pays to file anyway. Fashion Photographer Bruce Weber and Male Models End Legal Battles WWD.COM The photographer was once a constant creative resource for Condé Nast and major fashion advertisers.

Not so simple if you have bills and debt up to your ass.

It's relatively easy to get a free-trial of Hulu. This show can be watched in plenty of time before the trial ends. If you've done the free-trial before, you just need a different email address, and you sign-up using a different browser. Otherwise, you have to delete cookies on the browser you used to do a clean sign-up. The fact that I figured out how to do this several times is evidence that my brain still functions in my old age.

I got half way through, until 3 am. So glad they didn't do the weekly dump thing. I'm enjoying the jazz orchestra musical support elements. It has a similar brightness and zip that the piano thing had with Will & Grace, but far more enjoyable. Makes me want to dance. The show is very Hollywood sit-com formula, so no innovation here. The players are solid (especially with James Burrows directing), the writing is crisp, the edits are fast, and they seem to have created an homage to the Golden Girls. I absolutely loved the Golden Girls, so a good gay version of that is very welcome. Lots of room for supporting characters, although Jesse Tyler Ferguson as a fashionista is hard to buy. I love Vanessa Bayer. Lucky for Isaac Mizrahi that they brought him on as Consulting Producer. Linda Lavin is very good, in spite of her helmet hair. I wonder how the show deals with her death. The snarky Jewish mother is very much a part of this ensemble's chemistry. Interesting they touched on Matt Bomer's history as a former Mormon. The hymn singing scene was quite touching. It's a bit cliche that Matt gets all the hotties. The background of the friendships is developing nicely. A lot of the more serious conversations are relatable. Nathan Lane is chewing up scenery. He must feel very much at home. He can do full-on Off-Broadway on a Hollywood sound stage, and make a ton more money. I hope the writing team can keep up with the challenge. All the characters here are well equipped to deliver great lines and hit home runs. Good comedy is not easy. I wish them all good luck. We need a good laugh these days.

Just saw the first episode, twice. Some of the lines were very funny. Nathan Lee Graham is much better than I expected, passing him off as an Andre Leon Tally type. He's quite good. Matt Bomer as the dumb-blonde is perfect. Thank goodness they didn't actually make his hair blond. Didn't know Nathan Lane and Matt Bomer are executive producers. Serious gay-Hollywood clout behind this project. I hope it succeeds. Had to turn on closed-captioning, because they talk too fast. I missed a lot of words the first go-round.