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Happy birthday, Sam! Years ago I was out with my colleagues from the Financial Planning and Analysis area of the bank I worked for. The check came, and we were all struggling with the check. After a few minutes the CFO said "My confidence in our financials is soaring right now." We divided the check evenly.

I wish we could see a picture of the happy couple. EDIT: I mean a picture of them just being tortoises, not mating. We don't want to get certain members of the Forum all hot and bothered now.

Oh, I forgot to mention something:

In addition to the above, I'd add breath control, blood, pain, hard nipple play (when I ask someone nicely to be gentle on them and they don't listen they get to experience "knee-in-the-goddamn-balls" play), drinking piss (being pissed on is great), and overly verbal play.

Now give me a firefighter...

For you, @Funguy

Funny, but MY military guy wanted to meet me in LA, too! I don't recall whether he was stationed in Turkey, though. If he was, I'm giving that two-timing son-of-a-so-and-so a piece of my mind when we meet. Not a big piece, just a little piece. Have to conserve brain cells for the shirtless marine stationed in Turkmenistan who wants to meet up in Fargo, ND when he gets back. To be clear: they military guys don't sweep me off my feet. The fun part is toying with them. Maybe a better analogy would be the kitties batting around the bird-like feather toy before they "smother" it.

I receive the messages from hunks on a regular basis and upon clicking their profiles receive a message that the account no longer exists. That tells me A4A shut down the account. There's another flavor, though - the profile pics are taken from a distance and they feature the "good soldier" and a couple of kids or dogs or what looks like a community event. Those are the ones where the "good soldier" "writes" these long emails. Each time they press me for my phone number and each time I say something like "oh, gosh, I prefer to wait til I know someone to provide my phone number." After a few more messages I block them, report them, and move on. For those who are wondering why I even engage the "good soldier" it is analogous to my cats chasing the laser pointer dot. They know it is me making the dot happen and they know it isn't a real mouse/insect/tasty morsel of food/insert other item cats like to chase. They also know it is fun.

But seriously... If you explained to the guy that you would not be able to hire him, he should not pursue you. Period.

Um, if they are models then they are already monetizing their assets. They would simply receive a larger return on said assets.

He was advertising in Phoenix last year, so I sent him an email through the Rentboy system. No reply. Thought he might have been bisy, so when he popped up again I emailed again, no reply.

Bring me a ten-inch Romanian and we'll talk.

@Funguy, I am very sad to hear this news. Be strong and remember we are all here pulling for you. You are in my thoughts. Here's to a speedy recovery.

I've read the rules and will always follow them. Thank you for updating and posting them and placing links on each page where we may access them.

Actually, he does. And those armpits!

Oh, for heaven's sake. You've been a member since 2002 and you haven't figured out that asking an escort for information about himself is anathema? I'm being facetious, of course. Your post should be pinned at the top of every forum.

Which is taken from a column written on June 1, 1997 by the Pulitzer Prize winning Chicago Tribune columnist Mary Schmich.

Thank you

I don't know. Several guys have sent me messages on A4A about being good soldiers, looking for love and not hookups, etc. One went on about being a single gay dad of a couple of kids.

I'd hire them all for an afternoon of sailing their longboats into my harbor.

So true. I was sad when he retired from Morning Edition. While I was not a huge Bob Edwards fan, Carl Kassel made Morning Edition.

Welcome George!

Only if you have not read the book and don't practice its advice daily.

Hmm, we didn't receive that lesson in Chicago Public Schools. Then again, Chicago has as much in common with the rest of Illinois as a fish does with a bicycle. Or something like that.

Unless they are visiting the Commonwealth, in which case they like to cash their Czeques. Hey, @quoththeraven, can you hold the door open for me?