Doctor's office

[Guest skrubber]

While sitting in the doctor's office last night I spied a pretty good looking young man accross from me. Thin and cute - just my type. Then I spied his hands. He only had a pinky finger on each hand all the others were gone. From the look of his hands it appeared to be some sort of birth defect.

 

My first thought was how does he brush his teeth? (He had nice teeth). Then it quickly switched to how does he jerk off then how does he tie his shoes? I felt sorry for him.

 

I started felling pretty appreciative of myself. Although I am not an attractive guy I have all my fingers, toes and limbs. I walk upright and am apparently pretty normal physically. At age 50 I even have a full head of hair. Seeing all the escort pictures I have often thought why not me? After seeing this young man I felt pretty damned lucky.

 

So does anyone else feel as I do when they see someone physically infirmed?

[Guest Tristan]

This isn't exactly the reply you requested, but it's relevant. The patient you saw has a visible disability. I have what's called an "invisible disability." In other words, nobody would know I had the problem until a person got to know me well. You make a very good point that people should be grateful just to be able to function like a normal human being. I don't believe most people have the foggiest what it's like to lose any of the normal human functions. It really takes a person with a disability to understand what it's like not to have full use of your hands or your legs or anything else most people take for granted. So yes, be happy that you've made it this far and are still intact.

 

How does he brush his teeth? Who knows? He may have figured out a solution that wouldn't occur to normal people. People with disabilities learn to be creative out of necessity. I've had to think of creative solutions to accomodate my problem.

 

How does he jerk off? Again,who knows? Perhaps, he's lost interest from depression. It all depends on the person. On the other hand, maybe he is creative in other ways. Lay on yout stomach and rub against the bed. That feels pretty good.

[+ Lucky]

Observations like this are what makes life interesting.

Usually when I am captive with other people, such as on the suubway or a plane, it is fun to pass the time wondering what other people's lives are like. I'll bet everybody here does it.

[Spida]

I used to often feel why not me! Why couldn't I have the body of adonis that such and such has. Why couldn't I have grown up in a rich family etc etc... I think we all do at one time or another!

 

However, one of my best friends who is awesome, smart, witty, good looking, fun and had so much going for him was diagnosed about 7 years ago with Lou Gherig's disease. I have watched this horrible disease ravage his body while his mind has remained in tact and has grown quite a bit. I do not feel sorry for him, he would hate me if I did! I treat him as I would treat my other friends, while taking care to make sure he has what he needs if I can be of help. He takes care of himself pretty well, and rarely needs anyone's help even though the easiest tasks are difficult for him.

 

Strangely I am still sometimes envious of him, he is much more intelligent that I am, he interacts with people better than I do, has an intuition specifically about people that I wish I had. However, I hardly ever feel sorry for myself and say "why not me" any longer. I have learned so much from him, he never says "why me", never complains, or at least not nearly as much as I do! I don't want to speak for everyone out there that has a disability, however, I do know if you felt sorry for my friend he would be upset at you! He is so happy for what I have acheived and where his friends are in their lives, at times he keeps us on track reminding us of how lucky we are in a very gentle way. Almost everyone has great redeeming qualities that others would envy, it isn't always looks, or virility, it could be so much deeper, I am sure there are things others even the hottest escort would envy about you, or me! I feel lucky every day for what I have been given and have recently come to the realization that I should live my life to the fullest and make the best of my situation and it has been so much fun! (sorry for the long post)

[Chuck50]

Tristan you have poured your heart out and I heard you. I am sure that something bothers you as well. Or you have a disability that no one knows are you willing to share? I love you for who you are. HUGS Chuck

[Guest manreadyokc]

Wow . . . what a beautiful story, Spida, and thanks for sharing it with us. I'm sure your friend feels as lucky to have you as a friend as you do to have him. Nice thread, everyone.

[VaHawk]

"I'll bet everybody here does it."

 

Where do I go to place my bet?

 

And don't say hell as that would be way too obvious. I never wonder what the life of total strangers are like.

 

I believe most people enclosed in a confined area with strangers, such a subway car, airline cabin or elevator, just stare straight ahead into nothingness, hoping that none of those strangers will speak.

[+ Lucky]

nothingness...what is that?

[+ deej]

>I believe most people enclosed in a confined area with

>strangers, such a subway car, airline cabin or elevator, just

>stare straight ahead into nothingness, hoping that none of

>those strangers will speak.

 

Really? How sad for you.

 

I spent the better part of 10 years traveling, in planes, trains, busses through the Holland tunnel, airport shuttles, airport trams, elevated trains, etc.

 

"Most" people (my observation) seem relieved when people around them are open to friendly "we're all in this together" chatter. I had the most lovely conversation with a retired couple on a plane traveling to a Cubs training camp game. Likewise with a pilot who happens to be a weekend-warrior programmer, and so on.

 

People around you are only as closed and focused on nothingness as you are.

[VaHawk]

Did I not state "I believe"! Gee, if I hit the ALERT button in response to you following me all over the mc launching personal attacks on me, would I get any kind of fair, unbiased response? Don't bother to reply, as we all know the answer to that query!

[+ deej]

>Did I not state "I believe"! Gee, if I hit the ALERT button

>in response to you following me all over the mc launching

>personal attacks on me, would I get any kind of fair, unbiased

>response? Don't bother to reply, as we all know the answer to

>that query!

 

Hit the alert button all you like. You will most certainly get a fair and balanced response. If an alert is about me (should it ever happen), I will recuse myself and take no action. I will leave it up to my fellow moderators to judge, and they all do the same.

 

Am I not allowed an opinion as a regular particpant in discussions here? I was a participant long before I became a moderator.

[mansniffing]

Very interesting observation. There is a saying that goes: Necessity is the mother of invention. I watched a program recently that absolutely fascinated me. It was the story of a thalidomide baby and his journey through life. He was born with stubs for arms and instinctively started using his feet for tasks ordinarily done with the hands, beginning with holding his bottle with his feet. He has progressed through life as a happy individual. He has married, has children and is quite "normal." He uses a pen, a fork and knife with his feet and is most adept at using his feet instead of hands. He drives a car too. On occasion there have been ignorant people that objected to seeing him eating with his feet in restaurants. No reason to feel sorry for him. I'm sure he manages quite well in being inventive with his penis. You needn't feel sorry for the man you observed in the doctor's office. He knows it's different strokes for different folks and undoubtedly manages quite well. The pinkie is a most dexterous finger. Instinct is also what makes us gays so unique, we have special talents too.

[Guest Tristan]

Skrubber, thanks for starting a very nice thread. Until today, it has been free of the personal feuds that so often spoil other threads. People have expressed their opinions/feelings and told interesting stories. I'm sorry that a few people didn't allow it to remain that way.

 

[b/]I'm asking that there be no more personal disputes to put a damper on this unusually different and serious thread.[/b]