Would you or Wouldn't you??????

[+ Axiom2001]

Three weeks ago, a gorgeous escort who lives in the San Francisco Bay area had an extremely glowing review. In fact, he was chosen "Coverboy of the Day." In the "Deli" a few writers who'd seen his reviews and had gone to hiw website noted that in the photos at his site, he apparently barebacks. Well, lo and behold, I sent him a congratulatory email; he responded favorably. This week another review appeared in which the writer never stated that the escort wore a condom during anal sex. I, one who is interested in getting with this escort, wrote him another email where I asked if he used condoms during anal sex; a few days later the escort responded and stated that he always used condoms at the request of his clients, but he fucks without using one if a client requests. I have thought about his response for a few days and wonder what YOU would do? In other words, would you see this escort and be fucked by him with his wearing a condom? Would you engage in deep kissing with this escort? If the session is sizzzzzzzling, and apparently it can be with this nubian prince, would you rim his ass? Would you suck his gigantic rod? Just what would you do?

[trilingual]

Since I haven't the slightest interest in the world in becoming HIV positive, I would insist that any anal sex be with a condom. However, I wouldn't have the slightest problem kissing this man, giving him a blow job, or even having him come in my mouth unless I'd just gotten back from a heavy teeth-cleaning session with my dentist!

 

The risk of HIV transmission by anything other than unprotected anal sex or direct blood-to-blood contact is vanishingly low (if not downright non-existent). Other STDs can be acquired orally, though, so if this concerns you it probably would be better to think carefully about your options.

 

By the way, while I think it's unwise of this escort to bareback, we don't have any information about his own HIV status, and we have no basis on which to make any assumptions about it. If you want to protect yourself from HIV, it's YOUR responsibility to be sure your partner uses a condom, or to "just say no" if he won't.

[pierrot]

What you say is true, however I have to wonder about the intelligence and sanity of anyone who engages in bare-backing. I've had enough tragedy in my life because of this, and the thought of someone deliberately putting themselves at high risk is too much for me. I'd avoid him anyway.

[+ deej]

So you'd prefer someone who does it anyway but won't admit to it?

 

}(

 

You're ascribing a certain amount of safety to an illusion.

 

Effin' smileys don't work if they're the first thing on a line. Put a space in front of 'em.

[Nvr2Thick]

>... the escort responded

>and stated that he always used condoms at the request of his

>clients, but he fucks without using one if a client requests.

 

>In other words, would you see this escort

>and be fucked by him with his wearing a condom? Would you

>engage in deep kissing with this escort? If the session is

>sizzzzzzzling, and apparently it can be with this nubian

>prince, would you rim his ass? Would you suck his gigantic

>rod? Just what would you do?

 

Surf the bareback sites. If it surprises you that an escort barebacks on request you'll probably be really surprised at the number of escorts who have an escort ad or a personal ad on the bareback sites. There were even more apparent before Bareback City, one of the more prominent bareback sites, imploded.

 

There are a fair number of guys who went into porn or escorting BECAUSE they became HIV positive. I've talked to three escorts who had tested positive and dropped out of conservative gay society -- quit their corporate day jobs, moved to WeHo or some other gay mecca, started escorting and possibly some porn. Only one of these guys said he was exclusively safe.

 

If you pick up a man in a bar, or in a chat room, or hire one from an escort ad finding one who admittedly barebacks is no less safe than one who you know nothing about.

 

I guess what I read out of your question is: Would you only have safe sex with guys you believe to be negative?

[SouthBeachBtm]

In today's reallity, if a person doesn't want to catch HIV, you must assume that every person you come in contact with sexually is Poz. With that assumption, you must protect yourself at all times with a condem.

 

I do not believe in asking a guy his status because unless he took the test this morning, it is still not a guarentee that the guy he was with last night didn't expose him to the virus.

 

We cannot control the actions of others, we can only control our own behavior. So protect yourself, I certainly do. Besides, can you trust the word of someone who says he's negative??? Especially a stranger???

 

I have a friend who is Poz. He recently told me that a guy he slept with asked him if he was Poz and he said no. We got into an argument about his dishonesty. His argument was as long as we were safe, it's OK. My argument was, if he doesn't ask, I can understand. But if he asks then you either tell him the truth or lie to protect your privacy, but then don't sleep with him. Everyone has the right to their own risk levels.

[BobbyThompson]

It's a tricky situation, barebacking is. If someone tells you they're negative, that could either mean a) they are indeed negative, b) they are positive and lying to you, c) they are positive and don't know. Also, if they're negative, they're pretty much always in between tests anyway. If you want to be meticulously careful, use a condom. I know quite a few people who took someone at their word and later became positive from them. Don't assume someone you just met is going to tell you the truth.

 

When I top, which happens, let's say *rarely*, I would just prefer to use a condom. I don't like putting lube on myself so it's a nice barrier, and Buffy forbid there be a mess, condom takes care of that.

 

Catching HIV from insertive anal sex is nowhere near as risky as receptive. However, don't forget about HPV! EWWW! "They" say 50% of all anally-active (made that phrase up...kinda flows, doesn't it) men have warts in their anus. That number seems a tad high and I don't know how you quantify that, but nonetheless, if your penis rubs against them you can get the virus in the skin. You won't break out with warts because they rarely grow on the penis, but next time you bareback you'll give it to your partner and not even know. The CDC says it's such a widespread std that you don't need to tell your partner about it...so doubtful someone's gonna know they have them and if they do, tell you about it. By the way, you can also catch HPV from dildos and toys that haven't been disinfected. I *always* wrap them up with condoms just to be safe.

 

Wow, what a downer I am.

Bobby Thompson - Temporary New Yorker.

[VaHawk]

Personal attack [/font color]

[Guest]

>There are a fair number of guys who went into porn or

>escorting BECAUSE they became HIV positive. I've talked to

>three escorts who had tested positive and dropped out of

>conservative gay society -- quit their corporate day jobs,

>moved to WeHo or some other gay mecca, started escorting and

>possibly some porn.

 

If anything, one would think that being HIV positive would be a reason to get a regular job (with insurance). How would an HIV postive guy get private medical insurance? The costs of HIV meds and testing are prohibitive!

[VaHawk]

>If anything, one would think that being HIV positive would be

>a reason to get a regular job (with insurance). How would an

>HIV postive guy get private medical insurance? The costs of

>HIV meds and testing are prohibitive!

 

GOOD POINT!!! No FUCKING WAY, an HIV+ man will get private medical/health insurance OR life insurance!

[Guest Tristan]

Bobby, 50% is a tad high, but unfortunately not too far off. According to an article on: http://www.gayhealth.com ,40% of gay and bi men have HPV. Condoms do not protect you from HPV.

 

For anyone who's interested in reading about this lesser known STD, go to the website and just search for HPV. The article will pop right up. It's also the best website I've found for the latest information on issues relating to gay health.

[Guest Tristan]

RE: Addendum to Previous Reply

 

>Bobby, 50% is a tad high, but unfortunately not too far off.

>According to an article on: http://www.gayhealth.com ,40% of gay and

>bi men have HPV. Condoms do not protect you from HPV.

>

>For anyone who's interested in reading about this lesser known

>STD, go to the website and just search for HPV. The article

>will pop right up. It's also the best website I've found for

>the latest information on issues relating to gay health.

 

I just found more detailed information. Here's the direct link to it. Dr. Stephen Goldstone explains it better than anything else I've seen.

 

http://www.gayhealth.com/templates/1086882225467503535560/common/feature.html?record=2&searchwords=HPV

 

If you want all the topics related to this issue, click on "Ask Doctors", then do a search and all the articles will be listed. The link I provided explains why both partners having anal sex are at risk and exactly what this virus is. Sorry guys, but I guess we have to know. :-(

[+ Axiom2001]

RE: Addendum to Previous Reply

 

Fellows, thanks for responding! After reading your varying (sincere) takes re: my query, and after I have been giving more thought about my getting together with this particular escort, I have made my decision: if I do have an opportunity to see him, I'll continue to do as I've done previously: exercise safe sex practices.

[rocky]

The world we live in is filled with challenges.

But yet I have a problem with simple issues.

First; you decide to go out with an escort you

what he has done in past experiences so you always

assume there has been unsafe sex. That being

said, you make the decision; I will bareback or

I won't. No one else to blame but your self.

I realize that when I contact an escort that no

matter what we do there is risk involved, but that's

my decision. Why blame anyone else??

[VaHawk]

Never mind, just forget it, but please keep the vestal fires burning!

[VaHawk]

>That being said, you make the decision; I will bareback or

>I won't. No one else to blame but your self.

>I realize that when I contact an escort that no

>matter what we do there is risk involved, but that's

>my decision. Why blame anyone else??

 

Excellent points!!!! But you have to realize that you are interacting in a message board, where so many of the posters are clients who NEED the blessings/recommendations, and if they can get it notarized documentation of previous clients, before they will make a decision on hiring an escort. That is just the nature of the site. On the bright side, at least they, "so far", don't need to post a thread to get a consensus on whether one should wipe one's butt after taking a dump, and if so just WHAT is the ultimate brand of toilet paper!

[TotallyOz]

VA: Are you serious? Everyone knows that triple ply Charmin is the best. I guess the obvious never needs to be stated?

[VaHawk]

>VA: Are you serious? Everyone knows that triple ply Charmin

>is the best. I guess the obvious never needs to be stated?

 

LMAO! My point was definitely serious, although stated "tongue in cheek". What the hell is triple ply Charmin? Never heard of that product. Is it something new? And all this time I was under the impression that double rolled Charmin Ultra was as good as it gets!