$1 MILLION GAINED, $1 TRILLION LOST .... OH, WHO CARES!

[+ stevenkesslar]

Since the Department of Homeland Security apparently wants me to stop screwing around, I'm spending my valuable weekend hours learning about them, instead. After all, this is a review website. Why not just spend lots of time reviewing them, share what we learn, and try to get the fun facts we learn into major media?

 

Let's see, so far, I've learned that DHS wants to indiscriminately slam the sexual practices of all gay men in their complaints. At least, that's how The New York Times sees it. ("The criminal complaint is so saturated with sexually explicit details, it’s hard not to interpret it as an indictment of gay men as being sexually promiscuous.") I've learned they want to drive the "global criminal enterprise" of escorting off the Internet and back on the streets, which a global coalition of civil rights, medical, and LGBT groups says will make America less healthy and less safe. How cool!

 

What other fun things are there to learn about the Department of Homeland Security?

 

This is an excerpt from an article run in the Gothamist about the bust:

 

We reached out to the U.S. Attorney's Office and the Department of Homeland Security for insight into why this bust was made now, and what it has to do with the agency's five core missions:

 

Prevent terrorism and enhancing security;

Secure and manage our borders;

Enforce and administer our immigration laws;

Safeguard and secure cyberspace;

Ensure resilience to disasters

 

"[Homeland Security] was involved because the crime involved the internet," U.S. Attorney's Office spokeswoman Nellin McIntosh said. "I don’t have an answer as to why now rather than some other time."

 

We'll update if we hear back from DHS.

(Full article: http://gothamist.com/2015/08/25/feds_bust_rentboy.php)

 

I don't think we've really focused on this aspect of DHS that much- their role in protecting cybersecurity. In an article published on July 15, DHS head Jeh Johnson admitted, "Our federal cybersecurity is not where it needs to be." Really? Could it be? So is THAT the problem that busting Rentboy.com fixed?

 

(Full article: http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2015/07/federal-cybersecurity-needs-improvement-120061

 

Sadly, apparently not. The poor things at DHS, TSA, and NSA just can't seem to get very much of anything right - unless you believe the lies they keep telling the American people and even Congress to cover up their failures.

 

Apparently, even though they figured out how to find and bust the offices of Rentboy.com, there's still a small little problem. They don't have a plan to protect federal buildings from cyberattack. Period. At least according to the Government Accounting Office, which said in a January report that "DHS lacks a strategy for protecting government buildings from hackers, terrorists, corrupt employees and criminal groups who might want to breach their networks".

 

Full article : http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/federal-eye/wp/2015/01/14/no-one-at-homeland-security-is-addressing-cyber-threats-for-government-buildings/

 

Maybe we need to go get The Washington Post clued in. Don't they realize the DHS has much more important priorities, like arresting Lady Coco! I mean, come on, you silly Postie posters, get your priorities straight, or gay. Whatever!

 

I'm sorry, but these pesky newspapers and government watchdogs just seem so critical! I mean, who cares about federal buildings and the safety of federal employees when the DHS is focusing on a clearly much bigger threat - the "global criminal enterprise" made up of - well, you know, you and me.

 

And, really, who cares about things like infrastructure, electric grids, and nuclear power plants, when you have much more important threats like rentboys to worry about? I mean, just because cybersecurity compromises increased 64 % in 2014, and cybercrime will cost business $2 trillion by 2019, almost four times the estimated cost this year ... what's to worry about? Poor Jeh! Can you just give a guy a break?!? Just because both US and French IT executives "rate a serious cyberattack affecting critical services [like transportation or energy] and causing loss of life as highly likely within the next three years" ..... so what? Don't get your underwear in a bundle. (I'm assuming, of course, since you can't have a rentboy with you anymore, that you've got your underwear back 0n.)

 

Full article: http://it-tna.com/2015/07/21/cybersecurity-the-emperors-new-clothes/

 

I just think we have to give DHS credit where credit is due. They just earned $1 million in the Rentboy bust, in a way that they must know we can appreciate ... by fucking a bunch of perfectly nice people real good!

 

Granted, other than the million, they may not really have prevented any threat to national security. And granted, it's estimated that the next 9/11-like attack could be on the East Coast's power grid, and could cost up to $1 trillion.

 

Full article: http://www.businessinsider.com/r-cyber-attack-on-us-power-grid-could-cost-economy-1-trillion-report-2015-7

 

Why bother to really focus on a $1 trillion threat, when you can just target rentboys and earn $1 million instead? And I'm sure that if they miss the next real 9/11, just like the TSA misses almost all the threats that pass through their radar, according to the DHS itself .... well, I'm sure the DHS will think of somebody to blame.

 

There is, after all, always that "global criminal enterprise." Who cares about power, anyway, as long as we've gotten rid of the prostitutes!

 

http://static1.businessinsider.com/image/537f6ca569bedddf36a0f9dd-1200-800/shutterstock_193064282.jpg

[Guy Fawkes]

1.4 million

[+ purplekow]

I understand that this was orchestrated by the producers of Homeland who are looking to make it a CSI like franchise. Ripped from the headlines of the Huffington Post, our new spin off:

Homeland: Rentboys Go Down.

[bigvalboy]

Double like for you Mr. Kessler, and I wanted to make a 'whore' joke (there are so many) ...but there is a time and place for everything, and this is not it. This is serious stuff. Kudos to you for the post.