Three red flags to avoid bad escorts

[William]

The recent threads on Horndog NYC (avoid) and Tony Tigz (great experience) raise the question: For an escort with no reviews, are there danger signs (red flags) that can help the wary consumer make a good choice? IMHO, there is a kind of science to this:

 

RED FLAG #1. Ad uses stolen photos. Now that several posters on this website have become skilled at linking ad photos with their internet sources, this is one of the easier red flags. Useful Rule: Do not hire anyone using stolen photos. Sure, some posters say there are "shy" escorts who "borrow" a buddy's pix (e.g., Kyle Gibson), but I'd be skeptical (e.g., Kyle Gibson has a mixed reputation on this website).

 

RED FLAG #2. Ad is too good to be true: it usually is not true (duh). Awesome photos + low or even reasonable rates + vague promises of satisfaction + checking off most of the items in rentboy's "will do" list = scam in most instances. You might check this one against the next red flag, however.

 

RED FLAG #3. Escort starts your conversation or email exchange with "When can we meet" rather than with answers to your questions and then provides perfunctory "yes" answers to inquiries about what he will get into ("Do you enjoy roleplay?" "Sure" "What roles" Any kind. When do you want to meet?"). Sure, many escorts are curt or have too many emails/texts/calls to give thoughtful answers to everyone, but if the guy is too busy to answer basic questions he is probably going to be too busy to give you a quality experience.

 

There are other things that are Red Flags for me, such as an escort's limited language ability (not always a bad sign, but it makes it hard for me to be sure he is into the kinds of roleplay that I enjoy). But, honestly, I think these Three Red Flags would benefit almost anyone who secures the services of a male escort.

 

Responses? Have I got it right? Other Red Flags? (Original) William

[bigvalboy]

Excellent thread to start....I think you have covered a wide spectrum of issues that clients have to deal with. For me I think all of these things come to mind, and somewhere in my brain this 'red flag' goes up. To be fair, we are wrong sometimes. There are numerous posts were everyone will be pointing out the 'red flags' and suspicions, and then a couple of members will post how they have met the escort and he was, in a word, fantastic.

 

When hiring, you have to take everything into consideration, and then just make the best educated decision you can. Ya know sometimes it is wonderful, and other times it just doesn't work out, and you leave thinking that you should have listened to that little voice in your head.

[+ Gar1eth]

The recent threads on Horndog NYC (avoid) and Tony Tigz (great experience) raise the question: For an escort with no reviews, are there danger signs (red flags) that can help the wary consumer make a good choice? IMHO, there is a kind of science to this:

 

RED FLAG #1. Ad uses stolen photos. Now that several posters on this website have become skilled at linking ad photos with their internet sources, this is one of the easier red flags. Useful Rule: Do not hire anyone using stolen photos. Sure, some posters say there are "shy" escorts who "borrow" a buddy's pix (e.g., Kyle Gibson), but I'd be skeptical (e.g., Kyle Gibson has a mixed reputation on this website).

 

RED FLAG #2. Ad is too good to be true: it usually is not true (duh). Awesome photos + low or even reasonable rates + vague promises of satisfaction + checking off most of the items in rentboy's "will do" list = scam in most instances. You might check this one against the next red flag, however.

 

RED FLAG #3. Escort starts your conversation or email exchange with "When can we meet" rather than with answers to your questions and then provides perfunctory "yes" answers to inquiries about what he will get into ("Do you enjoy roleplay?" "Sure" "What roles" Any kind. When do you want to meet?"). Sure, many escorts are curt or have too many emails/texts/calls to give thoughtful answers to everyone, but if the guy is too busy to answer basic questions he is probably going to be too busy to give you a quality experience.

 

There are other things that are Red Flags for me, such as an escort's limited language ability (not always a bad sign, but it makes it hard for me to be sure he is into the kinds of roleplay that I enjoy). But, honestly, I think these Three Red Flags would benefit almost anyone who secures the services of a male escort.

 

Responses? Have I got it right? Other Red Flags? (Original) William

 

In general I think you are right with some exceptions. There was someone you mentioned the other day. At least I think it was you. I thought the escorts ad was fairly reasonable even if short on description- but you mentioned him having a vaguely worded ad with a laundry list of likes/skills on Rentboy. But what he listed was what are commonly listed by a lot of escorts- and he didnt mention 'diapers' so he had at least put a little thought into his list.

 

Oh and don't forget a 4th red flag- description that doesn't match pictures- like saying you are 'only' athletic when you have more muscles than Charles Atlas.

 

Gman

[Becket]

Yes, general vagueness is always a big red flag in my opinion. My other 100% guaranteed i'm-not-gonna-enjoy-this red flag is when a guy asks for his money up front. I'm always happy to put the fee on the dresser or at least show it to him. But in my own experience, I have NEVER felt anything but screwed (and not in a good way) when the guy pockets the money in advance. Yes, I know, sometimes there are rotten clients who will try to cheat the escort. But I have learned my lesson the hard way.

[William]

Yes, general vagueness is always a big red flag in my opinion. My other 100% guaranteed i'm-not-gonna-enjoy-this red flag is when a guy asks for his money up front. I'm always happy to put the fee on the dresser or at least show it to him. But in my own experience, I have NEVER felt anything but screwed (and not in a good way) when the guy pockets the money in advance. Yes, I know, sometimes there are rotten clients who will try to cheat the escort. But I have learned my lesson the hard way.

 

Becket, yes, I completely agree. My Red Flags were meant to head off the experience where you show up + the guy asks for money up front, usually a bad sign, but many of us are afraid of backing out at that point.

 

Maybe a useful way of thinking is this:

 

RED FLAGS raised by the ad itself, perhaps not always dispositive.

 

RED FLAGS raised by the conversation/texts with the escort. If they confirm suspicions/fears from the ad, I'd advise NO GO unless there is some reassurance from guys who have reliable intel.

 

RED FLAGS raised once you meet the escort. Too late for many of us--but if you are suspicious based on the earlier Red Flags and the guy asks for money up front, turn your back and leave immediately.

[bigvalboy]

RED FLAGS raised once you meet the escort. Too late for many of us--but if you are suspicious based on the earlier Red Flags and the guy asks for money up front, turn your back and leave immediately.

 

Or if pics don't match when you arrive, or if you just get a feeling in your gut..turn and leave immediately. Another forum member was telling me about an encounter he had. He had gone to a hotel room to meet the escort. He entered, looked around, and wasn't sure, but thought that something was just not right. He asked the escort if they were alone. The escort assured him that no one else was there. The member told me that he felt in his gut that something wasn't right, so he simply said, "This is not going to work" and left immediately. As he went to open the door, he realized it was already ajar, he opened it and stepped into the hallway and saw a 6ft drag queen coming down the hall starring right at him. He just looked right back and shot passed her and down the stairs. Was something up? He will never know, but at least if it was, he avoided a possible scam or robbery or worse.

 

Always trust you gut, it rarely lies to you!!!

[fromcali]

This is a great thread. This is what I've learned from my past experiences:

I meet any escort in a public place first. Whether it be my hotel lobby if I travel, a lounge or a coffee house. This way I can have a chance to see them in person, upfront, to see if they have lied or have accurate/false pics. At least in public I feel more comfortable in the first few minutes, telling them it won't work or I can walk away if they've completely lied. I think any legitimate escort would have no problem with this if they've been honest. I realize that some escorts would charge me for that time but I think it's worth it to me. I was tired of getting scammed and having to worry about my safety if I don't want to follow through with the session and then trying to get rid of them without having to pay the full fee. Even if I don't want to follow thru with the session, I honestly have had no problem flipping them $50-$100 for their time (depending of course on how bad they've lied about themselves!). If an escort doesn't want to meet in public, then I move on. The only problem with this is an incall. But I think an honest escort wouldn't have an issue meeting at a lounge or coffee house nearby their place as long as they're getting compensated for the time. Meeting in public has worked for me in the past and I'm always upfront about it when I talk to the escort beforehand. It works, because the honest ones are confident enough because they have been honest.

Also, I think twice about hiring any escorts without face pics unless they want to send one after we've talked. But, for me, I do this on a case by case basis. This has happened before and I've asked for a face pic and have always been sent one. Lastly, I'm going to be more upfront when it comes to whether an escort will kiss, suck, cum, etc. My last hire (Cody Hill) wanted extra $$, on top of the $200, for each of these and used fake pics, so I gave him $50 and walked away.

I don't think any legit escort would have a problem with any of this, if they do then perhaps they're not for me.

I'd be curious to hear any feedback from escorts on this subject too.

Thanks guys!

[operalover21]

The number one thing for me is usually ... one word responses. If I take the time to e-mail or text and get one word responses from a potential hire ... then that's a sign to stay away ... not looking for a novel ... but the ability to actually answer my inquiries is helpful.

[Lewis H]

Would we include asking for money up front? Granted, this happens already when you're with the escort, and some reputable escorts have asked for money up front in the past, but while it isn't necessarily a dealbreaker on a case to case basis, it's a red flag flapping in the wind so far as I'm concerned.

[chuy ciao]

What about when they lie about their age?? I always wonder what else they are lying about.

[bigvalboy]

What about when they lie about their age?? I always wonder what else they are lying about.

 

Absolutely. Now everyone plays the numbers game with their age, I get that. So subtracting a few years doesn't really bother me, but don't try and tell me your 25 when you are pushin 40...AND don't show me your pics when you were modeling at 25 when that was 15 plus years ago. If an escort wants to show pics when he was in his prime, fine...just show me something current as well, and let me make the decision, on whether or not I want to spend my money.

[VirginiaGuy]

One part of my work involves people coming to me because they need my approval to proceed. And every case is a little different, and a little individual, depending on the personal circumstances of the applicant. Over time I've come to realize that there may not be one specific thing that is a definite red flag. But there is a pattern to the flags, whatever the color. At the end of the day, I can always tell a true story because it just makes sense. There may be odd circumstances, but the narrative hangs together and all the pieces fit. When the pieces start to fall apart, or you have to make a lot of exceptions to normality to get them to mesh, that's when I know I need to be wary. Same is probably true in this field.

[+ azdr0710]

yes, excellent thread that should be "sticky"ed and be regularly contributed to....

 

re: paying up front and money talk...in my initial email back-and-forth (with a person I haven't met before), I'll usually confirm the cost (for his time) and say that I'll be leaving the money in plain view toward the end of the meet and that I don't want to talk about money at all during the meet.....this discussion is several "paragraphs" away from confirming what I want to have happen at the meeting.....I'm always polite and friendly, I ask if he has questions or comments, and I always say I'm looking forward to a fun, kick-back time.....his reply to all this, as said in other replies here, is key to how I think the meeting will go and if I'll proceed.....

[operalover21]

Money upfront is definitely a no-no. I don't mind lying about their age if they actually look the age they're claiming. There's a fairly well known escort who advertises that he's in his late 20s when I know that he is really 39. But he actually looks like he's in his late 20s so ....

[MrBigTL]

The biggest red flag to me is when the insist on receiving their money up front. I have never had a good experience any time the escort has insisted on being paid prior to the experience.

[+ Travis69]

Do clients ask the escort on the phone how and when the money is to be given or wait until the meeting?

[bigvalboy]

Do clients ask the escort on the phone how and when the money is to be given or wait until the meeting?

 

I can't ever remember discussing on the phone with an escort or email how the money was to be given, and I certainly never have paid up front...If it were to happen, I would walk away immediately. Many clients have gotten burned that way. One of the members here told me only recently about a client who got burned by giving money up front, and then the escort did not deliver as promised.

[marylander1940]

What about when they lie about their age?? I always wonder what else they are lying about.

 

I guarantee you that all escorts lie about their age, hopefully to make themselves look younger and not older.

 

Now about pictures... Handsome guys with face and body pictures do get more business than headless images, but the ones who are more discreet and don't show up their faces get invited to trips and make more money. Besides if you show your face while doing an illegal and immoral activity (prostitution is illegal in 99% of our counties) sooner or later the gay community will know about you.

[Guest verymarried]

About escorts' lies:

 

An escort's lies about his age got me into trouble in New Orleans. He advertised as being 19. I like going to bars with escorts in the French Quarter but was not sure about the bars' policy on 19 year olds. So I went to a couple bars the day before my appointment and asked. I spoke to one owner and he explained that the 19 year old was welcomed but he cannot order alcohol. So we returned together and the escort said he wanted "rum and coke." I said something about an id and he said "no problem, got it covered." So I ordered rum and coke and he started sipping. It was very crowded but the owner spotted me right away and came face to face with me saying in a loud harsh tone "He is underaged. I'm not going to lose my license because of you, get out of here." The escort says "I'm 23 and have an id to prove it." The owner became more irate and threatened to call the police and I was on my way out the door. Lies never seem to work the way you think they will.

[marylander1940]

About escorts' lies:

 

An escort's lies about his age got me into trouble in New Orleans. He advertised as being 19. I like going to bars with escorts in the French Quarter but was not sure about the bars' policy on 19 year olds. So I went to a couple bars the day before my appointment and asked. I spoke to one owner and he explained that the 19 year old was welcomed but he cannot order alcohol. So we returned together and the escort said he wanted "rum and coke." I said something about an id and he said "no problem, got it covered." So I ordered rum and coke and he started sipping. It was very crowded but the owner spotted me right away and came face to face with me saying in a loud harsh tone "He is underaged. I'm not going to lose my license because of you, get out of here." The escort says "I'm 23 and have an id to prove it." The owner became more irate and threatened to call the police and I was on my way out the door. Lies never seem to work the way you think they will.

 

You didn't check his ID or offered to have a drink somewhere else knowing he was old enough to legally drink?

At least he wasn't 17.

"Lies never seem to work the way you think they will". Does your wife or husband know you hire escorts?

[Jaker27]

Absolutely. don't show me your pics when you were modeling at 25 when that was 15 plus years ago.

I stopped doing that when I discovered a thing called "google picture search". That's just some splain'n I don't want to have to do:)

[Jaker27]

he explained that the 19 year old was welcomed but he cannot order alcohol. So I ordered rum and coke and he started sipping.

Ummm..as he should've. No offense but you should've known better yerself. Sounds like the guy was just being nice to you and you abused it. That puts the bar owners legally at great risk.

[bigvalboy]

I stopped doing that when I discovered a thing called "google picture search". That's just some splain'n I don't want to have to do:)

 

Except that "google picture search" doesn't tell you how old someone is....Well you can kinda tell by just looking, but by and large it just identifies someone passing themselves off as someone else. Right? I have not used it, even though someone showed me once, but I had been drinking, and I don't remember exactly how it works, so I could be wrong.

[Jaker27]

Except that "google picture search" doesn't tell you how old someone is....Well you can kinda tell by just looking, but by and large it just identifies someone passing themselves off as someone else. Right? I have not used it, even though someone showed me once, but I had been drinking, and I don't remember exactly how it works, so I could be wrong.

I agree BVB! However, sometimes doing those searches takes ya to some interesting places. Much like your drinking

[bigvalboy]

I agree BVB! However, sometimes doing those searches takes ya to some interesting places. Much like your drinking

 

Ssssshhhh, I will plead the 5th on that one......