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I know this does not apply to every escort, but the last two I have been with were not what their ads described. Both were on Rentboy.com. The first matched his description, but we had talked about me wanting to be introduced to some light bondage, also said I enjoyed kissing, oral and ass play, with his cock finally ending up in my ass. All it turned into was a suck session his cock only. Should have left, but paid for the entire time. Was I wrong. Then the second guy same thing, except I did get his dick up my ass. Though again no foreplay. Why state what you are into if you are not going to do it. I am average looking guy, before time together, I make sure that I am clean on the outside and very clean on the inside.

desertguy

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I know this does not apply to every escort, but the last two I have been with were not what their ads described. Both were on Rentboy.com. The first matched his description, but we had talked about me wanting to be introduced to some light bondage, also said I enjoyed kissing, oral and ass play, with his cock finally ending up in my ass. All it turned into was a suck session his cock only. Should have left, but paid for the entire time. Was I wrong. Then the second guy same thing, except I did get his dick up my ass. Though again no foreplay. Why state what you are into if you are not going to do it. I am average looking guy, before time together, I make sure that I am clean on the outside and very clean on the inside.

desertguy

 

My cynical side says they got your business by advertising a range of interests and then got paid for doing only what THEY wanted. :(

 

Write reviews, PLEASE, and hopefully save others from similarly disappointing experiences.

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I've no idea why guys do this. If you have a look at my site, under my services I have a link to a page where I list in FULL with descriptions about what I am willing to do and what I am not. I do not list things I don't do which I am quite clear about. I don't do WS or domination and if you need a safe word for your fun I am not the escort for you.

 

I also have a blog which although it's a documented diary of my sex live, thoughts, woes and winges, it does clearly stick to the facts. I do use artistic licence in it to ensure that no clients, villages, homes etc are identified, so although it might mention me visiting a certain town, I may have visited a completely different one for discretion purposes and a builder might be a painter, a teacher might be a doctor etc. From that blog, clients can easily work out how far I am prepared to go.

 

If you've told the escort that you expect to get fucked then I believe that you're within your rights to ask for your money back if he does not supply the service you requested. It's still a gentlemans agreement / verbal contract.

 

There seems to be a lot of these "oh look at me I am delicious and I should just be paid for looking pretty" type escorts about at the moment and it gives us hard working escorts,who try and deliver every time, a bad name.

 

I wished I lived over there, you'd all see what you can actually get for your hard earned cash, I do everything I agree to do and more +++++++ Remember it's your hard earned cash..... yours and if they're not working hard to earn it from you then they're not true to the profession

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I've no idea why guys do this. If you have a look at my site, under my services I have a link to a page where I list in FULL with descriptions about what I am willing to do and what I am not. I do not list things I don't do which I am quite clear about. I don't do WS or domination and if you need a safe word for your fun I am not the escort for you.

 

I also have a blog which although it's a documented diary of my sex live, thoughts, woes and winges, it does clearly stick to the facts. I do use artistic licence in it to ensure that no clients, villages, homes etc are identified, so although it might mention me visiting a certain town, I may have visited a completely different one for discretion purposes and a builder might be a painter, a teacher might be a doctor etc. From that blog, clients can easily work out how far I am prepared to go.

 

If you've told the escort that you expect to get fucked then I believe that you're within your rights to ask for your money back if he does not supply the service you requested. It's still a gentlemans agreement / verbal contract.

 

There seems to be a lot of these "oh look at me I am delicious and I should just be paid for looking pretty" type escorts about at the moment and it gives us hard working escorts,who try and deliver every time, a bad name.

 

I wished I lived over there, you'd all see what you can actually get for your hard earned cash, I do everything I agree to do and more +++++++ Remember it's your hard earned cash..... yours and if they're not working hard to earn it from you then they're not true to the profession

 

Steve really did say it best!

 

Write a review. Some really do advertise they do everything to get your business, if their ad looks like checked every box, try to get a little more out of them when you contact them.

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Writing a review will save the next client but it does nothing to correct your situation. You need to take control and stop the encounter when the problem arises. If they aren't phyically as advertised you leave. If you aren't getting what you want during the session you stop and address the situation and rectify it.

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I agree, reviews do help, also, after two times and reading the responses, if it isn't what you wanted then say no thank you and leave. Also, I would think this should also go for the escort, if the client is not who you thought, then it should also end.

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I agree, reviews do help, also, after two times and reading the responses, if it isn't what you wanted then say no thank you and leave. Also, I would think this should also go for the escort, if the client is not who you thought, then it should also end.

 

I don't know about any of the other escorts here but I imagine they are the same as myself, I know virtually nothing about them before I meet them the first time. Perhaps a little about their tastes but other than that....

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...also, I would think this should also go for the escort, if the client is not who you thought, then it should also end.

 

There have been two times when this happened that stand out in my mind. Both times were weekend trips, and it would have been hard to extricate myself from the situation. That is not to say that I shouldn't have—considering that the summed effect was that I stopped traveling altogether.three

 

Actually, three. And I did turn the last example into a much shorter appointment to avoid the possible hazards of simply walking out the door.

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(He)matched his description, but we had talked about me wanting to be introduced to some light bondage, also said I enjoyed kissing, oral and ass play, with his cock finally ending up in my ass. All it turned into was a suck session his cock only. Should have left, but paid for the entire time. Was I wrong.

 

Yes, you were wrong.

 

Instead of expecting your escort to not only understand, but also remember your play by play and enact it by the letter, it would serve you much better to take control of the situation, and as an adult in an adult interaction you could continue to communicate what you would like to experience and how. I hate stereotypes but escorts as a whole are not regarded as the best kind of men to keep track of information, remember complex scenarios and sometimes have trouble even remembering scheduled appointments. Yes, it's wrong, blah, blah, blah... yes, a professional should..... and shouldn't.... but chances are that as long as you will deal with escorts you will find forgetful men who have a boner and can't think.

 

If after reminding him about what you would like he ignores you repeatedly or refuses point blank, then you are in all your right to leave and pay for only the time you spend with him. (Don't walk out without paying if you have left the situation go for an hour. Address the issue right way.) If he explains why he is not trying what you talked about then listen to his answer and try to work to fix it together.

 

Communicate, ask politely, negotiate and listen to your partner's response. Which brings me to....

 

If you've told the escort that you expect to get fucked then I believe that you're within your rights to ask for your money back if he does not supply the service you requested. It's still a gentlemans agreement / verbal contract.

 

I know you and I have clearly stated that we are in somewhat different professions: You charge for sexual acts while I charge for the time I spend with my clients. We have said how neither is better or worse, but it is important to stress that different rules apply to different professions.

 

If you charge for pork, then if you don't provide a pork you should not receive any money.

 

If you charge for spending time with your client, whether or not there is a pork, if you spend time with your client you must be paid.

 

I am not a robot and will not do things that I am uncomfortable with. In other threads some of our colleagues have shared how they have chosen to do things that repulsed them in order to get it over with and make money. Personally I prefer not to do that and I won't. If a client is unkempt, smelly, unhealthy, rude, intoxicated, you name it, I will decline to do things I don't want to do. If the situation is easy to fix (let's say with a shower) then I will politely solve the situation. If the client refuses, then I will tell him that I won't be able to do what he wants to do. He can leave without any charge, or he can stay and we will do whatever we are able to do under the circumstances. If he stays and spends time with me, I will charge my full rate.

 

This is two consenting adults negotiating a normal interaction. To me, this is the only healthy way to do anything and this is the only way I have to make sure that I respect myself and feel proud about what I do.

 

If during the session my client feels that he would like to try other things as well, I would urge him to speak up and request those things, so that we can discuss them and if those things are possible, we can fulfill his curiosity, but if he contacts me two months earlier and obscurely, using an euphemism hints at what he would like to do and never mentions it again and then gets pissed after the session because he didn't get what he wanted, my only answer would be:

 

"Why didn't you tell me, in clear terms, during the session, what you felt like trying?"

 

I know some people get nervous during sex, during sex with a possible younger and somewhat famous escort... Some of us are shy and find it hard to speak about sex, even when there is a humongous penis on our face, but until we practice the simple art of effective adult communication we can't blame anyone but ourselves for not getting what we want.

 

Know what you want.

Read your reviews and choose the right match.

Learn about your body.

Prepare properly for whatever you want to do.

Communicate before, during and after the session.

Take the reins.

 

It's your life.

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I hate stereotypes but escorts as a whole are not regarded as the best kind of men to keep track of information, remember complex scenarios and sometimes have trouble even remembering scheduled appointments. Yes, it's wrong, blah, blah, blah... yes, a professional should..... and shouldn't.... but chances are that as long as you will deal with escorts you will find forgetful men who have a boner and can't think.

 

I nearly died laughing from eating this while eating a Sour Cream and Onion Pringle. It is so true.

 

Do you guys know how many sexual fantasies we hear? Let alone do you know how many "Mike's" and "John's" and "Joe's" and "Matt's" I meet or that contact me? Try keeping track of "I only like getting head when I lay on my side." or "You can't use your hand on me at all." or "I want you to bury your face in my daughter's dirty panties."

 

My point is we're not always being ditsy, we get a lot of information from clients and it can be difficult some times to sort through. I have a note pad where I just jot down date/time and what ever they might be looking for. If they have communicated with me primarily through email, I get up the morning of the appointment, check out Daddy's then I read every email they have sent me.

 

Not everyone is going to take it that seriously, if you're not getting what you want speak up. It is your dime after all. I had a client contact me after an appointment to ask if I didn't like giving head.... Of course I do. I explained that I read his body language wrong and thought he didn't want that. Had he said something or nudged me a little, I would have been more than happy to open my mouth wide.....

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I know you and I have clearly stated that we are in somewhat different professions: You charge for sexual acts while I charge for the time I spend with my clients. We have said how neither is better or worse, but it is important to stress that different rules apply to different professions.

 

I beg your pardon, where have I ever claimed to have a price list for sexual acts ?

 

I have never charged for sexual acts. I charge for time. I don't say well its $120 for an hour but if you want to fuck me its an extra fourty.

 

I think you have that all wrong.

 

I charge for my time and companionship and anything else that occurs is co-incidental and is at the discretion of two consenting adults.

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I beg your pardon, where have I ever claimed to have a price list for sexual acts ?

 

I have never charged for sexual acts. I charge for time. I don't say well its $120 for an hour but if you want to fuck me its an extra fourty.

 

I think you have that all wrong.

 

I charge for my time and companionship and anything else that occurs is co-incidental and is at the discretion of two consenting adults.

 

VERY well and discretely stated, but common guys (Steve AND Juan). We all know whats going on here, whether its prudent to say it on paper or not. Dont play us for dummies....

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You a dummy, no way, you're too vocal, dummies are usually souls

 

I wasnt trying to put either of you down with my comment, but it seemed you were going at each other over Symantics, which was truly unecessary since this is an ESCORT site and WE know the score. Its OK to have differing opinions, but we shouldnt endeavor to tear each other down.. I do believe people come here for support, or a safe haven to vent.... and maybe even to feel good about "purchasing time "....:o

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You're being a bit over sensitive. No one has been tearing anyone down. I like the banter, sometimes I don't agree with what's been said and I will have a say on the matter. I don't like being told I do things that I don't though ..... like the services for sale thing.

 

I am not always right but I am entitled to my opinion, some people say, oh you should never show yourself up infront of potential clients, that can be true, but a lot of clients like to see smart, inteliigent escorts who are not afraid of having an opinion and their own mind. It's makes life a healthy debate. If I worried about what people thought about me or my opinions I wouldn't be an escort.

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Back to the OP? As most of you know, I have "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt." Max says, "get a spine." In my case, I'm in a strange city with a "strange" man for the first time, he's admitted to having "moods" on steroids, he outweighs me by 50 pounds of muscle, and he has 40 years on me. AND he has great reviews on Daddy's. I've done my homework, and I'm still disappointed. So, do I add physical danger to this mix by stating I'll only partially pay or do I add further self-loathing by not only paying but adding a tip? Talk about a Hobson's choice. In the end, I think "discretion is the better part of valor" and "he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day." How, after all, can you depend on this man's civility and professionalism when he already seems to have violated both?

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Back to the OP? As most of you know, I have "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt." Max says, "get a spine." In my case, I'm in a strange city with a "strange" man for the first time, he's admitted to having "moods" on steroids, he outweighs me by 50 pounds of muscle, and he has 40 years on me. AND he has great reviews on Daddy's. I've done my homework, and I'm still disappointed. So, do I add physical danger to this mix by stating I'll only partially pay or do I add further self-loathing by not only paying but adding a tip? Talk about a Hobson's choice. In the end, I think "discretion is the better part of valor" and "he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day." How, after all, can you depend on this man's civility and professionalism when he already seems to have violated both?

 

You can't. But I've also repeatedly stated "have some common sense." Prepare for the situation so that it's unlikely you have to use a contingency plan (but have one). You've seen pics and you have stats, so you should have an idea what someone's body type is in relation to your own. Meet them in a common area, and if you don't like what you see—say "no." Trust me, it's extremely unlikely that the escort will do anything in public. Even if you have to make up an excuse—say, "I'm not feeling well," then extract yourself from the situation. And the self-loathing part is your personal problem, not whether your escort might beat on you if you decide to cancel the appointment.

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Back to the OP? As most of you know, I have "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt." Max says, "get a spine." In my case, I'm in a strange city with a "strange" man for the first time, he's admitted to having "moods" on steroids, he outweighs me by 50 pounds of muscle, and he has 40 years on me. AND he has great reviews on Daddy's. I've done my homework, and I'm still disappointed. So, do I add physical danger to this mix by stating I'll only partially pay or do I add further self-loathing by not only paying but adding a tip? Talk about a Hobson's choice. In the end, I think "discretion is the better part of valor" and "he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day." How, after all, can you depend on this man's civility and professionalism when he already seems to have violated both?

 

unsub, now you KNOW I love you, but your "over-rationalization" are merely excuses. AND, you are assuming alot about the reaction of your escort. Part of me seems to think you "like" all these conundrums, while the other part of me thinks you are truly troubled by them. The only way to learn is thru experience, and therfore maybe only grow a "partial" spine and TRY

diff approaches and see what works best. Even when an escort is WELL REVIEWED, going in with "expectations" is setting yourself up for disappointment. As has been recounted many, many times on this site, a good review DOES NOT insure YOUR experience will be the same, and perhaps your expectations of the encounter were unrealistic to a degree. Please note I say PERHAPS since I dont know YOU.... I think the rule of thumb to guide yourself should be that "if it aint what it says it was, then it aint gettin paid". If a person shows at your door and he truly is NOT what he represented, send him away , WITHOUT pay, and dont feel guilty. Dont invite him in for a discussion... Treat hiring somewhat the way you would shopping. you wouldnt purchase something that wasnt as it was advertised. NO SUBSTITUTIONS ALLOWED either ! The VERY best of Luck to you.... You WILL learn.

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Back to the OP? As most of you know, I have "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt." Max says, "get a spine." In my case, I'm in a strange city with a "strange" man for the first time, he's admitted to having "moods" on steroids, he outweighs me by 50 pounds of muscle, and he has 40 years on me... How, after all, can you depend on this man's civility and professionalism when he already seems to have violated both?

 

Easy. If he has admitted to having "moods" on steroids before the appointment, then do not hire him, regardless of his reviews. If he does not mention this until you meet, then ask him to leave. Would you have hired him if he admitted to using crystal meth or cocaine? What if he told you he enjoys kicking the shit out of small defenseless animals just for fun? If the answer to any or all of these is "no," then why did you hire someone who admitted to having "moods" while on steroids?

 

A review on this or any other site depicts a meeting between a client and an escort from that client's point of view. It is not a guarantee the escort is an upstanding citizen or a nice guy nor is it a indication you will enjoy your encounter with him.

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Back to the OP? As most of you know, I have "been there, done that, bought the T-shirt." Max says, "get a spine." In my case, I'm in a strange city with a "strange" man for the first time, he's admitted to having "moods" on steroids, he outweighs me by 50 pounds of muscle, and he has 40 years on me. AND he has great reviews on Daddy's. I've done my homework, and I'm still disappointed. So, do I add physical danger to this mix by stating I'll only partially pay or do I add further self-loathing by not only paying but adding a tip? Talk about a Hobson's choice. In the end, I think "discretion is the better part of valor" and "he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day." How, after all, can you depend on this man's civility and professionalism when he already seems to have violated both?

 

What needs to be understood about Max's comment about getting a spine, it is frustrating for us to read posts where clients have had an unsatisfactory experience but done nothing about it at the time. While each of us strive to create the perfect encounter for each of our clients, it can be a big tough job and cannot be done without the client's input.

 

There is always a way out of a bad situation. If it were me and I were scared for my safety I would want to get out of the situation as soon as possible, not finish out the appointment. The cost at that point wouldn't matter. "I'm sorry, I'm not feeling up to this right now but I don't want to send you away empty handed. What do you think is fair?"

 

Once you're there, in the room, the review shouldn't count for anything. What counts at that point is what you are getting out of it, and clients should not be afraid to speak up.

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What needs to be understood about Max's comment about getting a spine, it is frustrating for us to read posts where clients have had an unsatisfactory experience but done nothing about it at the time. While each of us strive to create the perfect encounter for each of our clients, it can be a big tough job and cannot be done without the client's input.

 

There is always a way out of a bad situation. If it were me and I were scared for my safety I would want to get out of the situation as soon as possible, not finish out the appointment. The cost at that point wouldn't matter. "I'm sorry, I'm not feeling up to this right now but I don't want to send you away empty handed. What do you think is fair?"

 

Once you're there, in the room, the review shouldn't count for anything. What counts at that point is what you are getting out of it, and clients should not be afraid to speak up.

 

This is not to say that I don't understand how you arrived at the logic that essentially you are being "strong-armed" out of your money. You're a client, you're nervous already, you're scared this is going to turn into a big, ugly scene and you just want it to stop and go away. That's fine—and in some cases could be the smartest and safest thing to do. Feeling guilty or full of self-loathing because you left a tip as well is another issue entirely. I think the root of the problem here is that many clients who meet with escorts are not the least bit ready to meet with escorts. And this runs the gamut from they don't get clean, to they aren't familiar with their own body to they hire irresponsibly. Hiring escorts is not a game for the faint-hearted (and I've said this before). Many things have the potential for going wrong, and the more open you are to that idea and prepared for it mentally, the better off you are to defend your safety and your wallet.

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Hiring escorts is not a game for the faint-hearted

 

One of the best things you have ever posted. The absolute truth....well said

 

 

.(and I've said this before). Many things have the potential for going wrong, and the more open you are to that idea and prepared for it mentally, the better off you are to defend your safety and your wallet.

 

Another very smart statement and great advice. You always have to prepare yourself mentally for the hire. I go through several steps to make sure things go according to plan. If you are uncomfortable at the door... leave. Have a line rehearsed of what to say, say it, don't blink an eye and do not hesitate, then walk away.

 

If I do go in and things are not right, I never leave the area of the front door until I am comfortable. If you are already inside, and feel uncomfortable, do not look at him, say one rehearsed line, don't hesitate for a second, turn around, say "I am sorry this just won't work" then leave... No explanation is needed. The longer you stay or hesitate the faster the situation can deteriorate.

 

But first and foremost...do your research on your potential hires. I frequently will research the escort here on the boards and then pm members who have talked about him. You would be shocked at how honest members are when talking off the boards or in emails....anyway all of this is just my opinion......

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