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Posted
11223913_907164895997965_7045318530749570082_n.jpg?oh=d998c51c198433fbb8f67f682adf6891&oe=56DE1F1C

 

Did I ever tell my favorite "kids" joke?

 

Q: What does a 400 lb canary say?

 

A: (In your slowest, most menacing, deepest bass voice) Here, Kittty, Kitty, -H- -E- -R- -E - - -K- - - -I- - - -T- - - -T- - - -Y- - !

 

 

[i had to use dashes instead of spaces in the last two words to spread it out, since the forum software seems to suppress multiple spaces.... anybody have any clues about entering unpadable spaces?

Posted

I may've posted this before, but don't have time to go back thru 67 pages.....

 

In Heaven, all the British are cops, the French are cooks, the Germans are engineers, the Italians are lovers, and it's all run by the Swiss

 

In Hell, all the British are cooks, the French are engineers, the Germans are cops, the Swiss are lovers, and it's all run by the Italians

Posted
I may've posted this before, but don't have time to go back thru 67 pages.....

 

In Heaven, all the British are cops, the French are cooks, the Germans are engineers, the Italians are lovers, and it's all run by the Swiss

 

In Hell, all the British are cooks, the French are engineers, the Germans are cops, the Swiss are lovers, and it's all run by the Italians

 

 

Here is another version, though it might be a bit outdated now considering China's rise:

 

In Heaven, you live in a British house, have a Chinese cook, make American money, and have a Japanese wife

 

In Hell, you live in a Japanese house, have a British cook, make Chinese money, and have an American wife

Posted
I may've posted this before, but don't have time to go back thru 67 pages.....

 

In Heaven, all the British are cops, the French are cooks, the Germans are engineers, the Italians are lovers, and it's all run by the Swiss

 

In Hell, all the British are cooks, the French are engineers, the Germans are cops, the Swiss are lovers, and it's all run by the Italians

 

One of my most favorite quips!!!!

Posted

 

I have a small collection of photos of Chinglish signs from my daughter's trip to China with a school group. Grammar is much simplified in Mandarin compared to English, which leads to these howlers; it's usually impossible to translate Mandarin into English literally and have it be grammatically correct English at the same time.

 

It's also possible one or more of these signs is in Japanese. The titke of Japanese heavy metal group Dir en grey's song "Ryoujoku no ame" is usually translated "Rain of Rape" but a better translation would be "Relentless Rain."

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