why my life must end...

[Guest DCeBOY]

OUCH!!!!!!

i just ate a pound & a half of cherries to console myself. now my stomach hurts! :'(

[Guest DCeBOY]

picture it:

the fresh fields on P street, about a half hour ago...

i'm wandering around trying (unsuccessfully) to find "smilax root" when i glance over & see the man who (if there IS a G_d!!!) MUST be my next boyfriend & last forever. to my surprise (nobody EVER hits on me--i'm scrawny, ordinary & very easily overlooked!) he gives me a very warm smile. like the goofey ass i am, i give a retarded little smile & rush away before i blush. then, later, i see him again & he says hi. so i say hi, but then the cheese woman asks me a question & the moment is broken.

now for the bad part...

the only other two people i see him talk to are the two people in the world i come closest to HATING WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING! yuck! and my beloved is leaving with one of them. of course, i hear him better now & he sounds like (as i believe traveller aptly put it) a giant floppy vagina.

 

can i have a volunteer to come shoot me?

[mmk]

Now Ethan,

* if you missed the Friday Cliffhanger of your favorite daytime drama, that would be a reason for your life to end

*if you had your heart set on Cookkies and Creme ice cream and the grocery store only had Cookie Dough Ice Cream, that would be a reason for your life to end.

* If you were hosting a John Waters Film Festival and the only 2 movies the video store had by him were Desperate Living and Cry Baby, that would be a reason for your life to end

 

But trust me Ethan, take it from someone who is ten years your senior, A MAN IS NEVER A REASON TO END YOUR LIFE!! We love them, we need them but we can live without them (For a little while anyway)

 

Look at it this way, at least you found out he sounded like a big floppy vagina before the fact (And be thankful that you do not have to come in touch with a big floppy vagina - that most definately would be a reason for your life to end)

[Guest Bitchboy]

Oh go ahead, kill yourself, see if we care!!! :)

[Guest DCeBOY]

nahh... i don't have the balls for suicide!

i was asking for a volunteer to shoot me. }>

[sdg]

the image of you passing a pound and a half of cherries may make us all want to die.

 

sdg

[Traveller]

There are either GAPING vaginas or PROLAPSED vaginas. Nothing in between.

 

Shooting BFs is kinda 20th century. Think small pox virus or something equally bio-chemical. (You know me, always, chem friendly.) Possibly a dirty bomb while he's racking with his new plowman.

 

Later.

[Rick Munroe]

>There are either GAPING vaginas or PROLAPSED vaginas.

>Nothing in between.

 

What about DRIPPING?

[Guest DCeBOY]

alas, we were never actually together. he (i think i'll call him gustavo) was just a bit of yumminess i encountered in the produce section.

[Guest Bitchboy]

> alas, we were never actually together.

>he (i think i'll call him gustavo) was just a bit of

>yumminess i encountered in the produce section.

 

 

Ahhh, now I see - voila, the cherries! :7

[Guest 7Zach]

personally, i go for oozing and gaping.

to bad there's not anyplace to use pustulating...course u could if the cunt is festering...i'll think about it.

[Traveller]

With DRIPPING, OOZING and especially PUSTULATED, we're no longer talking vaginas guys.

 

Of course, it's a DRIPPING pussy, an OOZING twat and a PUSTUALTED gash. Class dismissed.

 

Later.

 

PS. I think the new Roman, the new Anthony or the new and straight Rico will be on deck for this weekend; and maybe, two or more. DickHo, did you try Anthony?

[Guest DCeBOY]

if he's having sex with men, he's not straight no matter how much you'd like to think so. bi, perhaps, but NOT straight.

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Twat

 

My new favorite word but my feelings are soooo hurt.

 

I thought I was at least among the top two most hated on your list.

 

Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. At least some other guys really hate me....

 

}>

[Guest DCeBOY]

you'll survive

 

i'll organize a pity party for you, franco. :+

actually, if you want a real treat, just disagree with a certain fecund escort here and if you're especially lucky, he'll channel a high school girl & retort with "well, you're UGLY!" in spite of the fact that he's never seen you.

 

 

now, i never hated you. you used to annoy me. you still do sometimes. i told you personally what annoyed me. since then, i haven't heard from you so i've just got to assume that i'm a bit too forthcoming for your tastes.