Sister is getting married

[seaboy4hire]

For the 2nd time my sister is getting hitched. She & the guy have been living together for a while now. Am I expected to bring a gift? I honestly have no desire to go & only going out of obligation.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[Guest greatness]

Congrats

 

I love weddings... I go to every wedding I am invited to. It is so fun to watch two loving people getting married... I think you should go. Get something from her registry if you like...

 

For the 2nd time my sister is getting hitched. She & the guy have been living together for a while now. Am I expected to bring a gift? I honestly have no desire to go & only going out of obligation.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[AdamSmith]

Am I expected to bring a gift?

 

Time to do the Re-Gifting Tango!

 

Dig out the last piece of irrelevant impersonal crap that somebody gave you as a gift, re-wrap it, pass it on.

[Njbaseballjock]

For the 2nd time my sister is getting hitched. She & the guy have been living together for a while now. Am I expected to bring a gift? I honestly have no desire to go & only going out of obligation.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

If you attend the wedding and reception, you should bring a gift.

[GoodFella69]

Greg,

Go to the wedding and take a gift. I bet you'll be glad you did when it's all said and done.

[Guest Merlin]

And, if you vaue your relationship with her at all, must go and take a gift. She will always hold it against you if you do not.

[seaboy4hire]

I ask if I should bring a gift because this is her seond marriage & like I said in the first post she's been living with her fiance for a year or two. On a personal & funny to me is I went to high school with her fiance & I was ummmm a wee wild child at school > The stories he could tell about of my antics.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[Guest zipperzone]

Greg,

Go to the wedding and take a gift. I bet you'll be glad you did when it's all said and done.

 

I agree - take her a gift. After all it's only money. Dedicate your next escorting fee to buy it with. If you really want to be racy, tell her where the $$$ came from.

[seaboy4hire]

I agree - take her a gift. After all it's only money. Dedicate your next escorting fee to buy it with. If you really want to be racy, tell her where the $$$ came from.

 

LMAO!!!! Me telling her probably wouldn't surprise her with some of the things she knows I've done over the years including a porn. She wouldn't bat an eye. About to text her and ask where she is registered.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[Guest PWIT]

I ask if I should bring a gift because this is her seond marriage & like I said in the first post she's been living with her fiance for a year or two.

 

A friend of mine has been in similar situations with one of his sisters over the years. He reduces by half the price of the gift for each subsequent marriage. He jokes that the last marriage just cost him a gift card to a fast food restaurant. I am sure there is some comedic exaggeration in his yarn.

[uwsman2]

repeaters

 

One of my brothers has been married four times. The last time, they held a private ceremony and told everybody not to send gifts, so we complied! I'm not sure what happened to the gifts from the first three weddings.

 

Now my other brother has announced that he is getting married.... for the third time. I think he knows better than to expect gifts, especially if everybody in the family has to travel and get hotel rooms to attend the wedding.

[BewareofNick]

I ask if I should bring a gift because this is her seond marriage & like I said in the first post she's been living with her fiance for a year or two. On a personal & funny to me is I went to high school with her fiance & I was ummmm a wee wild child at school > The stories he could tell about of my antics.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

According to Miss Manners, gifts are not considered an obligation past the first wedding. It truly depends on how much you value the relationship with your sister and whether or not she will hold it against you.. Did she attend your commitment ceremony?

[seaboy4hire]

According to Miss Manners, gifts are not considered an obligation past the first wedding. It truly depends on how much you value the relationship with your sister and whether or not she will hold it against you.. Did she attend your commitment ceremony?

 

we haven't had one yet. Although I've been thinking about it.

 

hugs,

greg

[Guest Wetnwildbear]

Nothing Says Love Like . . .

 

A Crock Pot -

[NYTomcat]

I love the Crock Pot idea LMAO

 

But seriously they have been living together already and you seem to like them, get them something totally frivolous that fits them. When my cousin got remarried (we were close as kids) I got her a wurlitzer jukebox that plays CDs. I knew she had always wanted one but would never actually buy it for herself (Not sure I'd want it) but she loves the damn thing like crazy. Forget the kitchen bathroom ware. Thats wedding 1

[seaboy4hire]

A Crock Pot -

 

I LOVES MINES!!!!! Winter summer or fall it's a must have!

 

Hugs,

Greg

[+ purplekow]

Your attendance should always be the most important gift, but as far as a material gift, I think that if you actually like them as a couple and think they have a shot, then a gift is appropriate. If you are pretty sure this husband is just the one she has between her last one and her next one, then just attending seems like more than enough.

When in my 30s I thought that although I was single I really needed a party, similar to a wedding shower, I felt as though I had helped furnish the kitchens and other rooms of most of my friends and relations and with no prospects of a marriage in sight, it seemed that I would have to buy my own crock pot or toaster oven or microwave. Why shouldn't I have a single guy party, purely to get some of those unnecessary things, like a popcorn maker or a bread maker. While I never did have such a party, and although it sounds pretty mercenary to want a party for the gifts, I think that other people shouldn't be getting seconds and thirds and even fourths, while others who live a single life never get the thrill of opening their very own newly received combination pasta maker-shoe shine kit.

[MsGuy]

PK, weren't you just telling someone here to cheer up and get over it? I admit, though, to similar thoughts over the years as I was milked (& not in the good way) by my innumerable 1st cousins. Now my nieces & nephews are starting the cycle all over again. Bah humbug.

[+ purplekow]

MS I am over it. I am in the trying to get rid of shit stage of life. Clutter clutter and more clutter going out the door. RWEmerson was right. Simplify.

[Guest greatness]

hmm

 

Whenever I buy wedding gifts these days I buy something that they will really need. Not something they will re-gift . Although it is likely that I will not get anything in return, I find my consolation in that it is great to see people I like getting married and to be able to buy something for them.

 

Your attendance should always be the most important gift, but as far as a material gift, I think that if you actually like them as a couple and think they have a shot, then a gift is appropriate. If you are pretty sure this husband is just the one she has between her last one and her next one, then just attending seems like more than enough.

When in my 30s I thought that although I was single I really needed a party, similar to a wedding shower, I felt as though I had helped furnish the kitchens and other rooms of most of my friends and relations and with no prospects of a marriage in sight, it seemed that I would have to buy my own crock pot or toaster oven or microwave. Why shouldn't I have a single guy party, purely to get some of those unnecessary things, like a popcorn maker or a bread maker. While I never did have such a party, and although it sounds pretty mercenary to want a party for the gifts, I think that other people shouldn't be getting seconds and thirds and even fourths, while others who live a single life never get the thrill of opening their very own newly received combination pasta maker-shoe shine kit.

[Guest]

I ask if I should bring a gift because this is her second marriage & like I said in the first post she's been living with her fiance for a year or two. On a personal & funny to me is I went to high school with her fiance & I was ummmm a wee wild child at school > The stories he could tell about of my antics.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

You seem to be surprisingly judgmental for a gay escort. A gift is always a personal matter, of course, but if you love her and wish her well, a gift would seem very appropriate. Of course, if there's bad blood, you think the guy's scum and you've told her so and she's marrying him anyways, etc., then maybe you could pass on attending the wedding. I can't imagine attending a wedding without bringing a gift. Sometimes I send friends gifts even when I can't attend the wedding.

[Guest zipperzone]

You seem to be surprisingly judgmental for a gay escort. A gift is always a personal matter, of course, but if you love her and wish her well, a gift would seem very appropriate. Of course, if there's bad blood, you think the guy's scum and you've told her so and she's marrying him anyways, etc., then maybe you could pass on attending the wedding. I can't imagine attending a wedding without bringing a gift. Sometimes I send friends gifts even when I can't attend the wedding.

 

I think the Emily Post school of etiquette says that once you have received the written invite, you must send a gift even if you have no intention of attending.

 

For this reason I have always looked upon an wedding invitation as a type of invoice. Perhaps the bride should send you a carbon copy stamped "paid" after the gift is received!

[seaboy4hire]

You seem to be surprisingly judgmental for a gay escort. A gift is always a personal matter, of course, but if you love her and wish her well, a gift would seem very appropriate. Of course, if there's bad blood, you think the guy's scum and you've told her so and she's marrying him anyways, etc., then maybe you could pass on attending the wedding. I can't imagine attending a wedding without bringing a gift. Sometimes I send friends gifts even when I can't attend the wedding.

 

You seem very judgmental for never meeting me. As I said they've been living together for some time and this is her second marriage and I was basically wondering what the protical is. I've been living with my partner for almost 12 years now and when and if we get married I wouldn't imagine asking let alone expecting gifts being that we've been living together for just about the length of our relationship.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[Guest]

You seem very judgmental for never meeting me. As I said they've been living together for some time and this is her second marriage and I was basically wondering what the protical is. I've been living with my partner for almost 12 years now and when and if we get married I wouldn't imagine asking let alone expecting gifts being that we've been living together for just about the length of our relationship.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

I felt you were de-valuing the commitment because of the prior marriage and/or the fact that they were "living in sin." It's something I would expect from a party-line Catholic or a fundamental Evangelical. My brother and his wife lived together for several years before getting married. If anything, when people live together before marriage, it makes me feel that the marriage will last longer because they know each other well. They're high school sweethearts, and have been happily married for 33 years. My sister rushed into a marriage (her first), and it lasted only a few months. If she ever finds a new beau, I hope she will live for him for a few years to make sure they're compatible. If so, I would probably feel the 2nd marriage was more serious than the first.

By the way, I would be highly surprised if your sister's fiance hadn't told your sister all about your grade school antics long ago!

[Guest mvan1]

You seem very judgmental for never meeting me. As I said they've been living together for some time and this is her second marriage and I was basically wondering what the protical is. I've been living with my partner for almost 12 years now and when and if we get married I wouldn't imagine asking let alone expecting gifts being that we've been living together for just about the length of our relationship.

 

Hugs,

Greg

 

Well thought out response, Greg. Good for you!