BJ: Current standard practice

[justaguy]

What's the current standard in terms of blow jobs and cumming? Do most escorts allow a client to cum in their mouths? Is the usual practice for the client to indicate when he's ready so that the finish is by hand? Is there no norm so that it's best to ask on an individual basis? Thanks.

[Romann]

Great question and thank you for addressing it.

 

The best bet is to communicate your preferences and expectations to the escort of choice in the beginning so that an informed and educated decision can be made. Not all clients and escorts would prefer or enjoy a happy ending in their mouth while others have a deep desire for it. That said, communication and the addressing of expectations is key so that all parties involved can have an enjoyable and memorable time together.

 

While this this may sound like a generic answer, I don't believe there is a standard format for how an encounter should play out but rather it's important to have all the cards on the table in the beginning compared to surprising someone with an action that may not be desired or wanted for personal reasons. Some clients and escorts have strict policies of COMPLETELY safe policy while others do not - neither is right or wrong but rather a personal choice between the parties involved. It's always best to check with your partner, understand their limitations if applicable, move forward from that kind of conversation and allow everyone to make an informed decision.

 

I truly hope this helps.

[+ sf westcoaster]

There is no substitute for communication! When you are describing to an escort what you expect form your session, included the issue of blow jobs and weather or not you can cum in his mouth. For me, this is not an issue, since I adhere to a strict "always play safe" policy.

[Guest LeoWalker]

Romman is right, really all depends on the escort.

 

I've been asked what I think the hottest thing is...and my usual answer is to have a guy go down on me, be completely intent about what he's doing, and then generally swallow. Best part, to get paid. It's times like those that remind me why I love the profession.

 

Granted, on the adverse of that, I don't give unprotected head. To remove any misunderstanding of what "safe head" should be: with a condom.

 

This is a personal decision I've made to retain my good health. I also feel more comfortable with situations like what I explained earlier when I know I'm clean (aside from being regularly tested). To me, a client who doesn't want me to take such precautions is not concerned with my, or their own, health.

[JT Brooklyn]

Cards on the Table!

 

Great question and thank you for addressing it.

 

The best bet is to communicate your preferences and expectations to the escort of choice in the beginning so that an informed and educated decision can be made. Not all clients and escorts would prefer or enjoy a happy ending in their mouth while others have a deep desire for it. That said, communication and the addressing of expectations is key so that all parties involved can have an enjoyable and memorable time together.

 

While this this may sound like a generic answer, I don't believe there is a standard format for how an encounter should play out but rather it's important to have all the cards on the table in the beginning compared to surprising someone with an action that may not be desired or wanted for personal reasons. Some clients and escorts have strict policies of COMPLETELY safe policy while others do not - neither is right or wrong but rather a personal choice between the parties involved. It's always best to check with your partner, understand their limitations if applicable, move forward from that kind of conversation and allow everyone to make an informed decision.

 

I truly hope this helps.

 

Great Answer Dude! You and I hopefully someday will be discussing this in more DETAIL! !

[josephga]

Romman is right, really all depends on the escort.

 

I've been asked what I think the hottest thing is...and my usual answer is to have a guy go down on me, be completely intent about what he's doing, and then generally swallow. Best part, to get paid. It's times like those that remind me why I love the profession.

 

Granted, on the adverse of that, I don't give unprotected head. To remove any misunderstanding of what "safe head" should be: with a condom.

 

This is a personal decision I've made to retain my good health. I also feel more comfortable with situations like what I explained earlier when I know I'm clean (aside from being regularly tested). To me, a client who doesn't want me to take such precautions is not concerned with my, or their own, health.

 

 

 

I agree a individuals health is their own responsibility and you have made good choices with yours.

[alanalt]

Is there no norm so that it's best to ask on an individual basis? Thanks.

 

That pretty well sums it up. In fact, that rule applies to a heck of a lot more in every escort-client encounter than just BJs.

 

The problem you may run into is that some escorts will shy away from discussing specific sexual acts they will/will not engage in because exchanging money for sex is illegal in lots of places (and we sure wouldn't want to be doing anything illegal, right? ). However, there's nothing wrong in discussing, in general terms, about what you like to do sexually and asking an escort to do the same. I've found that approach to work very well in establishing mutual 'compatibility' prior to a session without concerning the escort that you're setting him up for a 'sting'...

 

Alan

[justaguy]

Thanks...and a small rant

 

Thanks for confirming what I thought was the answer. Now for the rant: Now that I'm ready to jump in the game, I'm starting to get pretty pissed off at American attitudes towards certain things. (Don't get me wrong. I really like most everything else about being an American.) The only thing difficult here should be making a choice. The only thing hard should be...a source of pleasure.

[+ Axiom2001]

You asked the question, and some escorts and clients cited their thoughts! Now I think you should not be in such a dilemma.

 

Although ejaculating in one's mouth and subsequently swallowing-- is definitely a personal and individual thing-- the bottom line is: "Practice Safer Sex" when you're fucking or sucking. The exchanging of bodily fluids is a NO NO in terms of one's participating in sexual activities that are safe. This has NOTHING to do with our country's Puritanical stances!

It all involves not contracting an STD with HIV being at the top of the list!

 

 

I do hope that I did not misconstrue your last comment/post!

[alanalt]

Now for the rant: Now that I'm ready to jump in the game, I'm starting to get pretty pissed off at American attitudes towards certain things. (Don't get me wrong. I really like most everything else about being an American.) The only thing difficult here should be making a choice. The only thing hard should be...a source of pleasure.

 

I don't get your rant at all. First of all, I'm not at all sure what the heck you're ranting against! But if it's attitudes towards oral sex, I don't see this as an 'American' thing. For instance, I know/know of several European escorts who will only give blowjobs if the client is 'covered up'. As Axiom says, it's a matter for each individual to make his own decision about what activities he's going to undertake given his particular comfort level with the varying health risks involved and has nothing to do with nationality, race, creed, etc.

 

The only real grounds for complaint I can see related to this issue is if the escort misrepresents himself as willing to do certain activities before the encounter and then does otherwise after the appointment begins without a good reason (i.e. if the client has bad hygiene or open sores etc.). But that's an individual thing - a problem with a particular escort (and if that sort of thing didn't happen, there'd be no need for review sites), but again, I don't see this as an 'American' thing - at least not to these Canadian eyes...

 

There are plenty of escorts out there and you've been given advice on the importance of communicating your expectations. If, after communicating, you find an escort doesn't fit the bill for your particular fantasy, then I suggest you move on because there are plenty of fish in the sea and eventually you'll find the guy who suits your needs!

 

Alan

[JoeyBryant]

included the issue of blow jobs and weather or not you can cum in his mouth. For me, this is not an issue, since I adhere to a strict "always play safe" policy.

 

Im not sure if you were referring to this , but do take into consideration about mentioning it over the phone because it borderlines phone sex and can be misinterpreted as a time-waster. I think asking if they give oral should help in terms and then ask during the booking if they would fellate to completion.

 

As for oral, I think using a condom for that takes away alot of the pleasure to it. There are some who cant get excited unless given a BJ, so putting on a condom would be impossible.

 

However there are people out there that believe OWO (oral without condom) poses a certain risk. I've heard of people running to get tested, or advising me to do so immediately after oral to completion. If there is any doubt of whether swallowing poses a risk for HIV, its actually quite minimal. Having taken class after class, and reading many articles on the subject.

[justaguy]

Separate Ideas

 

Sorry, guys, I tried to cram two ideas into the same post. The first idea was a thank you to everyone who posted in reply to my original question. The rant was aimed at the archaic laws that try to hinder a guy from having a little, or a lot, of fun. In the future I'll try to be clearer.

[alanalt]

If there is any doubt of whether swallowing poses a risk for HIV, its actually quite minimal. Having taken class after class, and reading many articles on the subject.

 

Medical opinion about the relative risks of HIV infection from unprotected oral sex has varied considerably over the years. And there's nothing to say that the current consensus won't change again if new research findings on the subject warrant it. Moreover, 'minimal risk' does not equate to 'no risk' and one person's 'minimal risk' is another's 'russian roulette'...

 

But I still think determining one's comfort level with whatever risk various sexual activities is an intensely individual decision and that making generalizations by nationality in this case is a decidedly unhelpful approach...

 

Alan

[alanalt]

Sorry, guys, I tried to cram two ideas into the same post. The first idea was a thank you to everyone who posted in reply to my original question. The rant was aimed at the archaic laws that try to hinder a guy from having a little, or a lot, of fun. In the future I'll try to be clearer.

 

Thanks for clearing that up. I think everyone understood the first part, but the target of your rant was a bit unclear. As for the laws surrounding prostitution, I agree they're a mess in the USA, but when you've got both the religious right and the feminist movement staunchly supporting the status quo, I doubt you're going to see much (if anything) change in the near future. But the US is hardly alone in that boat - trying to balance a 'guy's right to have a little/lot of fun' with protecting those involved in the trade and also eliminating/preventing the various tie-ins to organized crime is a delicate act that few, if any, countries have managed well...

 

Alan

[Guest LeoWalker]

As for oral, I think using a condom for that takes away alot of the pleasure to it. There are some who cant get excited unless given a BJ, so putting on a condom would be impossible.

 

I think it's mental...most of sex is mental. But, I can't say for sure. I used to worry about the same thing and that I was doing a disservice by only doing protected head...but that was until someone took my placid dick, put a condom on it, and worked me up until I quite satisfyingly came. From that point on, I feel very comfortable with my decision and don't believe I'm falling short in any regard.

 

For most, I think if they got over the fact and just tried to enjoy themselves, they'd enjoy it. For the others who may actually have a limiting factor due to abnormal sensitivities...I don't know what to say; sorry. But I'm sure this would not be the first time they had problems fulfilling themselves.

[JT Brooklyn]

How ya gonna "Work It"

 

Personally I think just the Fact that "Working Guys" have waaay more SEX than any of their "Clients" has alot to do with ANY of their decisions made!

 

I do like a Purdy Dick and just not to look at or "Cover Up"! Sucking on a Rubber has a very "Straight Paranoid" Female Connotation to ME!

 

Sorry IF I sound a little "Sigmund"! IMHO of course as always! HaHa

[+ Lucky]

Green

 

Would that we lived in Germany:

 

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2009/10/16/international/i064130D95.DTL&tsp=1

[Luv2play]

Would that we lived in Germany:

 

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2009/10/16/international/i064130D95.DTL&tsp=1

 

Ten years ago I spent a 10 day holiday in a Berlin male brothel. It was different from what you might expect, at least in this case. It was an upscale operation located in Kreutzberg (sp?) near the old Templhoff airport (which is very centrally located). Unfortunately it is no longer in operation and their website has been gone for several years.

 

What I liked was that the rooms were very large, in a nineteenth century apartment, and there was no pressure to hire from the stable of escorts who all lived off-site. When you wanted one, however, you just spoke to the owner and he produced a picture book (similar to what was on the internet site) and you could choose the guy you wanted. You could also hire from other sources since the room was at market rates and not subsidized.

 

In some ways the Germans really have things nice.

[Lookin]

Would that we lived in Germany:

 

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2009/10/16/international/i064130D95.DTL&tsp=1

 

I don't mind riding my bicycle to an escort appointment, but the extra thick padding I need on the way home draws far too many comments.

 

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31t9tWD5PgL._SL500_AA250_.jpg