Dating in the 21st century

[JayJxn]

I am a fairly recent widower after a 39 year relationship who is now ready to “put myself out there” and date again. The problem is that the last time I asked someone on a date was in the 1980’s when we picked up the landline (gasp), called someone we had met (usually) and asked if they wanted to go to dinner and/or a movie. How should I ask a guy out in the 21st century? Text? Email? Call? Leave my number in a bathroom stall?  Or should I just expect a life of random hookups from Grindr?

[+ purplekow]

As I am an old geezer, it seems to me the old way is the best way.  Meet someone, find you have something in common, as them out, then fuck your brains out and see where it goes.  

[+ ApexNomad]

11 minutes ago, JayJxn said:

I am a fairly recent widower after a 39 year relationship who is now ready to “put myself out there” and date again. The problem is that the last time I asked someone on a date was in the 1980’s when we picked up the landline (gasp), called someone we had met (usually) and asked if they wanted to go to dinner and/or a movie. How should I ask a guy out in the 21st century? Text? Email? Call? Leave my number in a bathroom stall?  Or should I just expect a life of random hookups from Grindr?

First off, I’m really sorry for your loss. It’s incredible that you’re ready to put yourself out there again, especially after 39 years!

Times have definitely changed since the landline days, but the good news is, the basics still hold: be genuine, be yourself, and ask someone out in a way that feels natural to you.

If you’re comfortable texting, that’s usually the go-to now. But honestly, a phone call can be a nice change of pace, especially for a meaningful connection—some guys will appreciate the old-school charm. Just maybe skip the bathroom stall idea unless you’re really aiming for that ’80s nostalgia! 

As for Grindr, it’s great for quick connections, but if you’re looking for more than a hookup, try mixing it up with apps like Hinge, Scruff or Tinder. At the end of the day, don’t feel pressured to follow any set rules—do what feels right, and trust your instincts. Welcome back to the dating world, and good luck!