Slow Starter NYC Need Spa/Masseur Advice

[mecloud]

I’m going to be honest and vulnerable here and just say discovered sensual massages later in life. I’m 50 and only started getting massages in the last 4 years. I’ve only gone to spas in NYC only. Have tried a bunch.

It’s always hit or miss. And there are times I feel like I blew through money without really getting the experience I was looking for.

My issue is I get very anxious with new masseurs and I’ve only really trusted one guy to deliver the goods. But there have been times when his energy was off. (Maybe just tired that day) so I’m looking for options.

I’m handsome but I’m not that fit. I’m not  unfit. I’m average. But my anxiety gets the best of me and I get self conscious of my body and my age and because it takes me a while to warm up, when it’s turn over time, I’m not in “attention” mode.

Since I’m willing to pay above average prices for a great experience. Bet 150-300.  I’m looking for recommendations for sexy masseurs in or out of spas who are not judgemental , empathetic and who is sensual and surprises you (I get aroused when it’s slow and seductive) and someone who pays attention to the nipples.

Any recommendations? It doesn’t matter if they’re in a spa or out.

Ugh. I feel like a loser posting this. Anyway, thanks all.

 

 

[+ Mrprofessional]

You are not a loser; you’re being honest. That’s brave in my book.  For what’s it worth, I’m not At attention until I get some direct attention during a massage  

 I’d scroll through this site for some nYC recommendations of people offering massages in private settings where you’re more likely to get more than a therapeutic massage.  Also you should DM the person who posts in order to get a more detailed account of what can happen w a particular person. Takes some research but that’s part of the fun!  

 

Couple of guys with excellent reputations to get you started:

https://rentmasseur.com/Blessings

https://rentmasseur.com/Eliron

 

[pubic_assistance]

19 hours ago, mecloud said:

Ugh. I feel like a loser posting this.

Definitely NOT a loser. If you're 50, and handsome, with an average build you'll still be way above level for the majority of the clientele that most sensual masseurs get.

It's not Grindr. You're not competing to be the hottest client. Just the nicest.

Lots of professional masseurs aren't particularly judgemental to begin with and it doesn't sound like you're in a category that would bring any judgement anyway.

 

Edited February 22, 2023 by pubic_assistance
grammar

[JayinHKNYC]

If you find someone you like, consider repeat business rather than feeling like you need to try 20 different guys just because everyone is talking about them. If they do a good job, and you're relaxed, and receive the attention/service you want. go back to that person.

[+ WstVlgChris]

33 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said:

Lots of professional masseurs aren't particularly judgemental to begin with and it doesn't sound like you're in a category that would bring any judgement to begin with.

 

This is very true. If a masseur has had a modicum of real  training, he'll have absorbed a basic tenet they have in most massage schools: that one finds something lovely in every body one touches. 

JayinHKNYC also gives good advice: find someone you click with and return to him. I have two regulars I alternate between and am very comfortable with them (and they don't judge my old-man body).

 

Good luck!

[vasudev]

Thank you for being vulnerable and posting this. I’m sure you’re not alone in this situation, I for one feel the exact same way - very nervous and self-conscious. Recently I’ve begun accepting my body for what it is - imperfect, flawed, concealing a kind heart. I think a lot of people (not just masseurs) respond to this self-acceptance, and kindness goes a long way. Treat them like you’d like to be treated. 

[sense]

This is the best thread ever -- thanks so much to "mecloud" for getting it started and to all the others who have replied.  I'm in the same place but I've given up the self-consciousness -- I'm the paying client and a genuinely good practitioner totally gets that and wants to be a good person.  Recommendations for Alex ("Blessings") are totally accurate, he is exceptional.  I've wanted to try "SS" but haven't -- will do so now that i see yet another citing of him.  But here's what I do -- which some guys won't like, saying they're "too busy" or whatever, but the good ones understand it:   Text and ask if you can give them a call to talk first about what you're looking for.  The good ones will be fine with that.  Don't take much of their time, of course, but be honest and clear -- the good ones will appreciate it, and it will separate them from others right away. 

Try James in TriBeca area too -- sorry I don't have his link but he's on MF.  Mature guy, so not the 25 year old muscle dude, but really good, and honest and open and caring. 

Thanks so much for this topic.    

[Redwine56]

1 hour ago, sense said:

This is the best thread ever -- thanks so much to "mecloud" for getting it started and to all the others who have replied.  I'm in the same place but I've given up the self-consciousness -- I'm the paying client and a genuinely good practitioner totally gets that and wants to be a good person.  Recommendations for Alex ("Blessings") are totally accurate, he is exceptional.  I've wanted to try "SS" but haven't -- will do so now that i see yet another citing of him.  But here's what I do -- which some guys won't like, saying they're "too busy" or whatever, but the good ones understand it:   Text and ask if you can give them a call to talk first about what you're looking for.  The good ones will be fine with that.  Don't take much of their time, of course, but be honest and clear -- the good ones will appreciate it, and it will separate them from others right away. 

Try James in TriBeca area too -- sorry I don't have his link but he's on MF.  Mature guy, so not the 25 year old muscle dude, but really good, and honest and open and caring. 

Thanks so much for this topic.    

James is one of my regulars.  After a massage with James, you will feel pampered.

[Njguy2]

8 hours ago, sense said:

 

Try James in TriBeca area too -- sorry I don't have his link but he's on MF.  Mature guy, so not the 25 year old muscle dude, but really good, and honest and open and caring. 

 

https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/1099/  Link to James

[+ EVdude]

8 hours ago, Redwine56 said:

James is one of my regulars.  After a massage with James, you will feel pampered.

GREAT thread! As I’ve posted previously, James holds a special spot in my soul. He was the very first masseur I ever went to. That was in Fort Green, Brooklyn, pre-9/11, closeted and nervous. And he so quickly melted all of my negative self-conscious feelings about my physical and mental being.