If I had a nickel for every time I'd said that...

[samhexum]

I'd be flat broke...

I was rejected from a job because my penis is too big

 

 

A man with an impressive 9-and-a-half-inch penis has alleged he was rejected from a job because they thought he had an erection during his interview.

British television network Channel 4 featured the man — Joe — on their show, aptly titled “My Massive C–k,” which follows well-endowed men.

While some on the series admit they don’t mind their large appendages, others are seeking reduction surgeries following struggles to fit in among peers and strangers.

Joe, who chose to withhold his surname, is among those who have said that their large penis has gotten in the way of leading a normal life, and even derailing his career.

“The scaling is off, quite off. It’s thicker than my forearm, it’s about 7 [inches] around,” Joe said of his privates, according to Metro.

   

Joe said his large member requires he wear special underwear with a “pouch” to “fit everything in,” and prevent his penis from “falling out.”

However, Joe recalled that his bespoke briefs did him no favors during his embarrassing job interview.

“The response I got was ‘You’re not going to get the job, we thought you were a good candidate, but we thought there was inappropriate behavior happening,'” he said on the program.

   

“They thought I had an erection throughout this whole interview, and they were very much like, ‘You’re attire wasn’t right,'” Joe recalled — the subtext being “we can see your d–k,” he suggested.

The synopsis or the show reads: “An extra-large penis is an object of desire for many. but for some men, ‘extra large’ seriously complicates their lives and relationships, and penis reduction surgery seems the only answer.”

I'd think some members here might offer him a...ummm... job.

[samhexum]

I have the world’s largest penis — it’s still growing and sex is hard

https://nypost.com/2022/10/26/man-with-worlds-largest-penis-says-its-still-growing/

He’s a grower — and he’s tired of showing it.

A New York native with “the world’s largest penis” has spilled the tea on some of the struggles he has faced having a titanic tallywacker — which he claims is still growing. He dropped the bombshell in the upcoming Channel 4 documentary “My Massive C – – k,” in which “massive” men describe the struggles of being sexcessively endowed, Jam Press reported.

“Since my testicles are also extremely large, I’m cognizant of prominent bulges,” revealed Brooklyn native Jonah Falcon, 52, whose willy measures a whopping 13.5 inches when erect — more than double the US average of 6 inches.

This “battle of the bulge” has, among other things, forced Falcon to forgo wearing tight pants. “I tend to wear baggy or pleated pants to go ‘incognito,’ ” the phallically gifted man lamented of his massive member, which also measures a whopping 8 inches wide.

Falcon said he first realized he wasn’t like the other boys when he was in elementary school, explaining: “I was already over 4 inches flaccid when I was 10, so I had already caught the attention of other boys in boarding school.”

“Being more than twice as big when flaccid as an adult (just over 8 inches soft, more in very hot weather) gets reactions from guys,” he added.

Indeed it has been a schlong road for Falcon, who claims he “was recently stopped by the LAX airport security for a giant unexplained bulge in my pants caught by a scanner.”

“They frisked me and confirmed I was ‘all natural,’ ” the well-endowed fellow explained. “This is a normal occurrence with electric scanning devices though.”

Unfortunately, like the Blob of science-fiction movies, Falcon’s massive manhood is apparently getting even bigger, which has paradoxically presented him with problems in the boudoir. “For some reason, it’s gotten thicker to the point I can’t receive oral sex due to the girth, and intercourse requires a very slow entry,” he said. “As a trade-off, it’s harder to get absolutely fully erect — though that’s a function of age, I think.”

When Falcon does achieve liftoff, he often gets “lightheaded” — although he believes the symptom isn’t related to the size of his penis. In summation, Falcon’s penile predicament proves that bigger isn’t always better in the sack.

Despite his struggles, the California resident refuses to get a penis reduction, presumably because of his johnson’s celebrity status. Falcon previously claimed he has bedded porn stars, actors and even Oscar winners — although he’s never specified who.

“It wasn’t Meryl Streep — I’ll just leave it at that,” quipped Falcon, boasting “it’s a real compliment when porn actors and actresses say I’m bigger than all of the partners they’ve had.”

On the flip side, the embattled man is concerned that people only like him because of his big penis, adding that he’s fed up with gawkers asking him to free the willy. “I’m sick and tired of having people wanting me to measure it in front of them,” Falcon fumed in a 2021 appearance on ITV’s “This Morning.” “I’ve done it 10,000 times — enough already!”

It seems like a read a story about him every year or so.  Maybe if he stopped giving interviews and going on TV shows, people wouldn't recognize him and ask to see it.

 

[jeezifonly]

Anyone with this problem can easily find a gay tailor, even one who’s willing to work pro-boner. 
I mean bono.

Custom clothing can be made for the situations in which it’s distracting, like work, funerals, first time meeting the in-laws. 
Obviously, for trips to Walmart one would freeball under light gray sweats…😂

[samhexum]

My ‘extra large’ penis is a ‘gift from God’ — I’ve slept with over 1,000 women.  It’s the lord’s “magnum” opus.

An Irishman with an “extra large penis” calls his jumbo johnson a blessing that’s allowed him to sleep with over 1,000 women, and become an uber-successful porn star. The “divinely endowed” former plumber spilled on his titanic tallywacker on the Channel 4 series “My Massive C–k,” in which “massive” men describe life with a plus-sized penis.

“My big d – – k is a gift from God,” boasted Andy Lee, 34, whose willy measures a whopping 10.5 inches while erect — nearly double the US average of 6 inches. The Dublin native even reportedly unzipped his pants on the show to flaunt his massive phallus, which he claims is the biggest in the Emerald Isle, the Irish Mirror reported.

While most on the series complain about their mammoth members, Lee claims “my size has benefited my life.”

“Some men on the Channel 4 show cried about how it negatively affects their lives – but it has only brought me fame and fortune,” bragged the Dubliner, who reportedly earns £10,000 ($11,568) per week on OnlyFans.

It’s been a schlong road for the self-proclaimed “most googled Irish porn star in the world,” who reportedly grew up in inner-city Dublin with “no money.”

The future skin flick star moved to Australia in 2008 when he was 18, then to London at 21, where a chance encounter at the gym paved the way to porn stardom — call it divine skin-tervention.

“A fella just said that I have a really big c – – k and that I should go into porn, so I did,” described Lee of his “Boogie Nights”-evoking rags to riches story.

Interestingly, after filming “some solo videos,” Lee ditched porn to become a plumber, only to return after his workplace found out about his salacious side hustle, the Irish Mirror reported. In other words, he came full circle.

“I’ve been doing porn full time ever since,” said the plumber-cum-pornstar, who now resides in London. Not one to discriminate, Lee makes “porn videos with men and women,” although he insists that he’s “not gay” and that “it’s just for money.”

The benefits of a behemoth bulge have been more than just monetary.

“I’ve been with over 1,000 women,” claimed the Irishman, who boasts over 382,000 TikTok followers. “When I launched a TikTok account, I was contacted a lot by Irishmen and women. Some wanted to get into the industry and some wanted sex with me.”

Lee sums up his sex-cess like this: “I was a young Catholic boy from Sheriff Street with nothing and now I am famous for my huge c – – k,”

[samhexum]

Man with ‘world’s largest penis’ reveals hardest things about daily life

 

Edited August 26, 2024 by samhexum
To maintain the incredibly high standards I have established here