Accepting a drink while with another client.

[Cooper]

>I would never accept a drink from anyone while out

>with a client. Oh, by the way, did I mention that I don't

>drink?

 

Rick, It's a good thing you're not one of my escorts, for I'd probably drive you to drink!

[Guest DevonSFescort]

I think this type of thing must happen to dancers a lot more than to escorts. To most escorts' clients a drink is a drink is a drink -- have a good evening and all that. But for those who hire from venues like strip clubs or hustler bars it can be a signal, an opening salvo in a bidding process maybe. I'd bet this guy thought maybe you were there wooing your dancer friend, not already on a date with him, and reckoned he still had a chance to win the dancer away from you. I remember when I was at the Gaiety and wanted to hire Trevor (:9 ) I got to feeling a little competitive about the other patrons. I made damn sure I dropped him the biggest tip on the stage and as soon as his second number was up I bolted to the lounge. I'm saying that dancers probably bring out a sense of rivalry in their clients more so than escorts do -- after all, you can just call or email us and make an appointment, and often you can take your first pick of the date and time. And if you see an escort out you're more likely to assume it's on a date than that the situation is still in play. I think dancers must deal with a much more intense meat market factor than I have to.

 

All that said, if one of my clients bought me a drink while I was out with another client, I'd probably thank him, say that I wouldn't be able to join him this evening but that I'd be sure to get in touch (and yes, I'd follow through later). To me that seems like the best way to avoid exactly the drama that ensued.

[guyinsf]

I agree with the other client that a simple, "No thanks" or "No thanks, I'm busy" would have been better. Still, however, it sounds like the other guy continued to get more drunk. His behavior isn't too puzzling if he was rip-roaring drunk -- not to excuse it, but people do become very uninhibited when drunk. Sounds like this guy has a nasty side that comes out particularly strong when he's drinking.

 

As to you, Cooper, you mentioned that you thought about getting up and punching the guy. I think you really need to think about this. Were you plastered as well? Assuming that you do not think the escort you were with was unable to defend himself in any way, your impulse to punch someone else on the escort's behalf indicates something about your thoughts and feelings in this circumstance. You certainly seem quite attached to this escort as well.

 

It's amazing how something so small (admittedly rude, but small) became such a dramatic scene. But perhaps you like drama and messiness. It sounds like you are going to continue to hire the other escort who didn't acknowledge your birthday and asked for a large loan from you because you have a "strong" relationship. I hope this doesn't come across as rude, because I mean it genuinely and not as an insult, but it does sound like some money spent on therapy might be helpful for you.

[Cooper]

Hey Devon, You've made a good point, perhaps some dancers and escorts can respond to it...By the way, were you able to win the bidding war for Trevor? He really is a beautiful man. He's got a great muscle body, beautiful face, and gorgeous eyes. I don't know what you look for in a "gay4pay" private, but for me, it was truly disappointing. How did it go with you?

[Cooper]

Hey guyinsf, thanks for taking the time out to respond...It's easy to look back on a situation and say what you should or should not do. And if it were to happen again I'm sure I would react differently. However, there is a lot more to this "buying a drink" story. The other man (yes, quite drunk) was making sure that the bar crowd knew who I was with and because of his uncalled for remarks, we were just about to leave when this occurred. Punching him out would have given me great satisfaction, but I didn't.

 

As for still seeing the "b-day/loan" escort. I'm certain we can work things out. After all, look at all the advice I got! I never looked at these "concerns" as reasons to end the relationship. There are just too many good things going on that I've never mentioned. You see, it started out as just sex for pay, but now 9 months latter, it's becoming more personalized. Like in any relationship you both have your expectations, as long as you can keep them REAL, things just MIGHT work out. I just don't walk away from an escort/client relationship because things don't go my way. That's too easy...but perhaps that's how you handle your affairs...One of the writers spoke of good communications, and he's 100% correct. Now that was some good advice.

 

As for seeing my escort this week, no problem, he already knows he's not getting the loan, but I'll give him ideas on how to save and invest his "Gaiety dollars". If he really wants that car he'll earn it.. Also, I'll "gently" communicate my feelings on b-days and how I like to celebrate them.

Hearing from other M4M members was reassuring to know that I'm not the only one dealing with these issues. As one writer put it, he's found one of the "good ones" who he's going to celebrate his b-day with.

 

Take care.

[Guest DevonSFescort]

>By the way, were you able to

>win the bidding war for Trevor? He really is a beautiful

>man. He's got a great muscle body, beautiful face, and

>gorgeous eyes. I don't know what you look for in a "gay4pay"

>private, but for me, it was truly disappointing. How did it

>go with you?

 

The bidding war was the hottest part in a way! When he saw that twenty on the stage he got right in my face and those eyelashes of his almost got tangled up with mine.

 

When it comes to bodybuilders, especially one as hot as Trevor, I'm more than happy with just getting to put my hands all over his body and while he stands there and flexes -- which, I realize, isn't enough for some people, but I've got such a fetish for them that I'm easily satisfied. I found him to be a very nice guy with no attitude and enjoyed chatting with him. If I'd been looking for reciprocity or passion he wouldn't have been the way to go, but for muscle worship he was just the ticket. (I think he lets guys blow him, too, but his cock wasn't what I was after.)

 

I wrote about it in my diary at the time, and somebody wrote me a couple days later and said he'd hired Trevor and gotten to wrestle with him. I hadn't even thought to ask for that, but there's something to go back for... }>

 

As many privates as these boys do in a day, I'd imagine clients' experiences with them would be all over the map in terms of quality, at least until they get to know you.

[guyinsf]

No, I don't have a habit of just walking away from relationships when I don't get my way. I would not continue a relationship, however, with someone who (a) requested that I buy tickets for an event and then avoided my phone calls after the tickets were purchased; (b) set up another for-pay date and then didn't show up; and © at the same time was trying to get a large loan from me. Even for the "hottest" guy in the world, I wouldn't put up with being treated like that -- pay or no pay.

[btmstudnyc]

Hmmmm...what a question...would I turn down a drink? I'm not sure...that would depend on who sent it and why.

 

I could leave it on the bar. I could drink half and send it back to him. I could offer it to my current client..or I could send it to some schmoe at the end of the bar...I could offer it to a dancer. I could give it to the bartender...I could put a napkin in it....I could accidentally spill it. I could buy the same drink and send both back to the original sender. I could say thanks and just eat the ice. I could pretend that I ordered it and not acknowledge the sender. I could tip the waiter for the amount of the drink (in plain site.) I could say thanks and drink it and get blasted so my current client wouldn't have to pay for my drink. I could eat the olive and send the drink back with the waiter...and tell him to tell the sender....that I don't drink absolute martinis on Fridays when Im with Fred. I would definitely make drama to avoid drama. Hell I might Put my hands over my head...kiss my current client and say VERY LOUDLY. MY GOSH....YOU DONT HAVE TO BUY ME A DRINK...ID FUCK YOU REGARDLESS!!

 

jim

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