Country Club Rules

[+ Lucky]

Aren't you glad that we don't have dress codes to post here in Hooville? As long as the escorts are naked, no one cares what we wear.

 

But, I am forced to belong to a local country club as part of my HOA, and today they announced their new "liberalized" dress code. Some examples:

 

On the golf course: No denim of any kind, no collarless shirts. Shorts cannot fall less than 4" above the back of the knee. "Tasteful" cargo shorts may be allowed, but no rips, holes, or frayed seams. No exercise apparel. Shirts must be tucked in. Caps can be worn- IF the bill faces forward. No flip-flops or sandals.

 

For tennis, the shoes cannot have black soles, and no cargo shorts or tank tops are permitted.

 

In the dining room, women can wear spaghetti strap, halters and strapless blouses. No hats for men. No shorts. The rules change after 5 pm and from November 1 to April 30th. No mini-skirts. No denim...it goes on and on.

 

Can you imagine being on the committee that comes up with all of this? To think that I have to spend $1000 a year to belong to a place I never go....and that money doesn't even allow me to play golf or tennis- that's extra!

[+ LIguy]

Ah Lifestyles of the rich and non famous :7

[Guest ncm2169]

Wasn't it Groucho who famously observed, "I wouldn't belong to any country club that would have me as a member." }(

[Guest BillC37]

I agree with these rules. My Country Club has the same rules. Additionally, one is not allowed to use cell phone in the club house - a very pleasant cellphone-free area!!!

[+ Lucky]

Do you have any trouble measuring that 4" distance?

[Guest ncm2169]

< I agree with these rules.

 

Somehow I'm guessing you think Dick Cheney deserves a third term. x(

 

Stuffed shirts, anyone?

[Guy Fawkes]

Hey Lucky,

 

Well it's been 20 years or so since I did drag... But willing to do so for a good cause... Want to take a big date out to lunch at your Country club?

 

I'd be sure to comply with all of the dress codes required. Are feather boas in or out? For heaven sakes; I hope I don't have to wear white this late in the season.

 

Regards, Daddy

[Rick Munroe]

>Do you have any trouble measuring that 4" distance?

 

OK, that made me LOL, Lucky. :7

[+ ArVaGuy]

Do they ban Speedos at the swimming pool? If so THAT would be an outrage. I'd demand my club dues back if that were the case.

[+ Lucky]

Hmmm...maybe we could move the Hooville dinner to the country club next year, with Daddy as featured speaker!!

[+ Oliver]

By all means, look into that! }( Following the rules for one evening would be worth it for that!

[Guest Delaware Man]

Darling,

At least on the right coast, one is not caught dead wearing white after Labor Day.

[jasoncarter_dfw]

>Hey Lucky,

>

>Well it's been 20 years or so since I did drag... But willing

>to do so for a good cause... Want to take a big date

>out to lunch at your Country club?

>

>I'd be sure to comply with all of the dress codes required.

>Are feather boas in or out? For heaven sakes; I hope I don't

>have to wear white this late in the season.

>

>Regards, Daddy

 

Daddy..it all depends on what pageantry system you're competing in ;-)

 

Make sure your foxtails are dyed to correctly match your evening gown ;-)

 

- Jason Carter - Dallas, TX

- jasoncarter53@hotmail.com

- (972) 365-0120

[Trixie]

Hmmm... I rather doubt that there'd be ANYONE at that Country Club one would want to see in a speedo, except perhaps for the lifeguard. BTW- is the Lifeguard there for rent, Lucky? They almost always are.

 

 

La Trix

[+ Lucky]

The club is too cheap to have a lifeguard!