Gar1eth

In my humble opinion, I'd prefer not to waste my time doing that. I mean sure every situation is different. But in general I'd like to know what the escort is generally into from his ad. I hate ads with very little info and 'Ask Me-s' on the important info categories. I don't mind confirming information that is listed in the ad. In fact I highly recommend doing that in case the the guy is one of those escorts that blindly checked every option in the world to appeal to the widest client base without ever planning to fulfill the majority of what he had listed. But I am not into guys who base everything they are willing to do on the nebulous factor of chemistry. That's too much work for me. I'm reminded of a Forum Member, although I can't remember who it was now, who liked finding non-professionals off Backpage or Craig's List. He enjoyed the thrill of the chase. That never really appealed to me because when I was horny, I wanted someone then. I didn't want to have to cultivate someone over weeks. Don't get me wrong. I'm glad you guys like Ryan. And I understand his physicality is incredible. But you could never really say that he is a "top" tier escort (in my humble opinion) no matter what his talents are because most top tier escorts are usually a lot more forthright in their ads and seem to be able to generate chemistry (or fake it extremely convincingly) with the majority of their clients. So when I think of someone top tier, it would be someone like @Mikegaite or the recently retired Alec Andrews-guys who are/were known to be able give stellar experiences to almost every client. Gman

Gosh-universities are really getting intrusive into their students' lives. My Alma Mater never cared a whit about my pubes!! Gman

While I know this from prior reports, it would probably be helpful to the newer guys on the Forum if y'all would mention that as great as Ryan is, he is not (what is generally known as) a full service escort. You'd be doing a solid to both newcomers on the Forum and to Ryan himself because it will hopefully cut down on guys contacting him and looking for things he doesn't offer. Gman

It is interesting that he lists himself as gay. In the old Rentboy days, the majority of Eastern Europeans listed themselves as bisexual or straight. And it seems to me that there were repeated complaints that a lot of them promised the moon and never delivered. Gman

I'll have to disagree. I had an unofficial German minor in college. German is definitely not English. Google translate is usually pretty good. And you're correct that a lot of Germans know English. But there are degrees. You can't talk with everyone. Gman

Would Rentmen be the only site left with a large number of guys in America on it? Gman

I've only been to Paris once back in the dark ages (1989). I remember thinking that I felt it reasonable that the average man on the street might not understand English. But it was very frustrating trying to make reservations at a major train station -the Gare du Nord. If there hadn't been a Canadian guy who spoke French next to me in line along with his Haitian girlfriend who helped me make a reservation out of the country, I would have had a much more difficult time of it. Gman

I'll bet he still is. And speaking of the Hardy Boys- I was never that enamored with Shaun Cassidy. But I did like Parker. He starred in the 1972 film adaptation of "A Separate Peace" as Gene. I hated the book -we had to read it in school. I'm not much for depressing literature. He also starred in a movie in 1974 with Pamela Sue Martin called "Our Time" which reminded me a lot of "A Separate Peace." One of my favorites. http://www.thepulp.net/pulpsuperfan/files/2016/07/mystery-of-the-silver-spider.jpg It's looking me that' I can't remember this book. I know I know it. Gman

This sounds very familiar to me. I may know it too. But I can't remember anything else about it either although the children baking a cookie with magical properties seems to stick in my memory. Gman

Referring to my 1st post in this thread about "Put Me In The Zoo," I just remembered another book with a character that could do wonderful things with color. It's called "The Dragon Who Liked To Spit Fire." It's about a Dragon who wants to be a prince's pet, but the castle folk think dragons are too dangerous. He can spit fire of many different colors. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6ph07XbjYUU/TgyIvWgsNzI/AAAAAAAABO8/ub0E2VTzZPE/s1600/The+Dragon+Who+Liked+to+Spit+Fire+cover.jpg Gman

I loved most of Edward Eager's books. I wasn't that fond of, I believe it was called, "Magic or Not" and it's sequel where the magical occurrences were probably not magical in nature. Did you ever happen to read Grimbold's Other World" by Nicholas Stuart This was a great book. I tried some of the E. Nesbit books. I can't remember if I finished any of them or not. Her writing style was very old fashioned, and I remember having trouble plowing thru it. Did anyone ever read "Black and Blue Magic" by Zilpha Keatley Snyder? It's about a boy that is given a lotion that gives him wings. During the late 1970's they often made Doctor Strange look as muscular as Superman. It was a good look on him. I loved it. Gman

You read that at the age of 10 or under? Gman

We actually read Johnny Tremain in 9th grade English and watched the film. I have a brother who is about 7 years older than I am. When I was 6, I came across a box containing his old comics which he no longer read. He had a collection of about 350 comics. I already liked to read, and I began a love affair with comics-mostly DC with some Marvel thrown-in until I stopped reading them for the most part when I was about 24. I've still been known to buy one every once in a while. But the occurrences are extremely rare. Gman

Most of the Oz books had simple titles. I'm almost positive your first one was titled either 'Ozma of Oz' or 'Princess Ozma of Oz' and only a little less certain that the second was 'Tick-Tock of Oz' or possibly if not that something like 'Tick-Tock The Mechanical Man of Oz.' I'd look them up. But it's 4:45 AM, and I have to get some sleep. Gman

Anyone read 'The Five Little Peppers'" and the sequels? Some neighbors had a series called "The Happy Hollisters". I liked them too. When I was a bit older-say 4th grade-I liked the "Brains Benton" mystery series. I think this was the first one I read. And it had this cover. Gman

I loved that too. I think either my 3 or 4th grade teacher or the librarian read it to us. Then I read it for myself. In fact I bought the book a few years back to re-read it. Gman

:eek:!! I always liked looking at bodybuilders. I loved watching the movie "Lil Abner" due to this scene. http://www.conelrad.com/conelrad100/images/lilabner.jpg But I wasn't looking at bodybuilding magazines that young. Gman

I was just listening to my sister-in-law reading some pre-nap time stories to my almost 2-1/2 year old great-niece (i.e. my sister-in-law's youngest granddaughter). And I was thinking about books I liked when I was young. http://dl.dropbox.com/s/fpvszvtk0n0maj5/IMG_0147.JPG?dl=0 At the age of 3 or 4 I can remember loving the story of the "Teeny-Tiny Woman." It's about, strangely enough, a teeny, tiny woman who finds a bone that she decides to use to make soup. I had my Mom read it to me so much that I could repeat it back to her by looking at the pictures. I also loved (and still love) "Put Me In The Zoo." There was something about the idea of the animal changing it's spots that I really liked. Maybe it was the illustrations. Then in first grade we could order books from the Weekly Reader Book Club. I think 'Miss Suzy' was one of the first books I ordered. It's about a squirrel run out of her tree by some other squirrels. But don't worry. She finds a dollhouse to live in. Also I think around 1st grade I discovered the Boxcar Children Series by Gertrude Chandler Warner.http://dl.dropbox.com/s/8pfb9cewts9us4w/IMG_0149.JPG?dl=0 I might have been a bit older than 1st grade as I remember reading most of the series myself although my Mom might have read at least parts of this 1st one to me. I particularly liked "Surprise Island" where the children find they have an older cousin. I knew the 1st book had been written before I was born. When I was older, I found to my surprise that Gertrude Chandler Warner had only died in 1979 when I was 18. I had thought she had died long before. If I had known she was still alive during most of my childhood I would have thought about writing her a letter telling her how much I enjoyed the series growing up. Another series I loved as a child was I think one of my teachers read the book during story time. And I picked up the rest of the series after that. What books did you like? Gman

Thanks. I read a lot-always have-fantasy or light-hearted mysteries mostly. I'm not anhedonic. Gman

Muscle Service Station https://www.muscleservice.com/ Gman

I appreciate the vote of support. Unfortunately I'd have to say that I disagree with Ms. Smith's formulations in the article you posted above. In my opinion if you've accomplished Ms. Smith's 4 Pillars, then I would think most people would be reasonably happy. If they aren't, then either something might be wrong with them or with Ms. Smith's Basic Pillars. I, on the other hand, while I accept I'll probably never be happy-or let's not use happy-let's say non-depressed-I am not happy (or if you prefer 'am upset') about it. It bothers me greatly. I think about it constantly. And no, just because I can't change it doesn't mean I don't wish things were different. I do. But there are lots of things that I wish were different that can't be changed. I wish my father hadn't suffered from Alzheimer's disease for the last 5 to 10 years of his life. I wish by the time I was ready to tell my immediate family I was gay that I had been able to tell him and have him say he still loved me. (We as a family decided not to tell him because of his Alzheimer's. He might have understood. But also maybe he wouldn't have. And possibly even if understood could have forgotten the conversation several days later as he had trouble remembering what he had for lunch that day. ) I wish I hadn't had thyroid cancer. I wish I didn't have Myasthenia Gravis. I wish I weren't bald. I wish I hadn't waited so long to have sex. I wish I were capable of falling in love with the proviso of there being someone falling in love with me. I wish I were good at sports. I wish I could sing. Just because something can't be changed doesn't mean you don't care enough to wish that it could. In spite of what therapists tell you, some things just are. Gman

I appreciate everyone's advice. But I just don't think it's in the cards for me to change. That's why I'm often reluctant to go to therapy. Before March of this year, it had probably been about 2 years since I had seen a therapist. And the one I saw then (for a few sessions only ) was one I had seen for several months a few years before that. I have some basic assumptions about the way things are or should be. I don't care if no one else shares many of my assumptions. But they form my basis of reality. (Don't worry the majority of my reality is the same as most people's. I don't live in a fantasy world.). I subscribe to the idea (and not only for myself) that just because the way you feel/believe about things may make you unhappy, it doesn't necessarily mean that the beliefs are wrong. It's just unfortunate that things turned out that way. On top of these inner feelings, my "external" circumstances/objective day to day reality (which I don't really want to go into here) is pretty crappy. And what's more I don't really expect it to ever get much better (in all possibility there's a slight chance it could get better, but the probability is extremely low. And there's probably at least a 50/50 or better chance that things will get worse at some point). Now if I could resign myself to my externals, which is what the latest therapist seemed to want me to do-yes possibly I'd feel better. But while I can't really do a lot about my current situation (And no I'm not going to explain. You'll have to take it on faith that I know what I'm talking about.), it's not what I want. If I somehow, someday feel significantly better about it, it would only be due to inertia causing me to finally give in or a massive brain injury which totally changes my personality. Given that I'm not willing to change my inner reality because my feelings are valid to me, and that it doesn't seem to be in the cards for my external reality to improve ever but definitely anytime in the foreseeable future, I don't think happiness for me is in the cards. Gman

That's all fascinating. I'm going to look at all these references. But I don't think I have PTSD. And while it's nice and convenient for me to hang the majority of my problems on being gay, I honestly think I'd still have some type of problems even if I were straight. I think it's just my nature-the way my protoplasm and my environment have interacted to produce me. People aren't perfect. Not everything can be fixed. Gman

While I'm not sure your supposition about me not finding the right therapist is correct-after all since they all tell me the same type of things, and give me pretty much the same type of suggestions, then an outlier therapist with a totally different viewpoint might be suspect. Other than that your assessment of me is probably pretty spot on. Your comments about change reminded me of a character quote in the book "Prince Caspian" by CS Lewis. I had been thinking the quote was from "The Lion, Witch, and the Wardrobe, but I was wrong. The scene is the Pevenseys, who were former rulers of Narnia, have returned to Narnia after 1000's of years. Not everyone is pro-Pevensey. But they meet a badger who is a Pevensey partisan even after all this time. The badger declares, "“I’m a beast, I am, and a Badger what’s more. We don’t change. We hold on.” So it looks like I'm a beast. What kind of beast you ask? Apparently I'm a badger. And I don't really think I can change. I've never been able to fully acclimatize over going bald 27 years ago. If I can't adjust to that, I don't have much hope for overcoming more important attitudes. Gman

I'm not interested in medication. I've been tried on three different medications 4 times in the past. They had absolutely no effect on my mood for good or ill. But they all led to unpleasant side effects of one type or another. Since I was prescribed them, there have been more and more questions posed on how effective they really are. Plus, at least from a NYT article a few months back, it seems that withdrawal symptoms can be more severe than were initially recognized. https://nyti.ms/2GK795C?smid=nytcore-ios-share I can't say that the NYT article was the reason I'm not willing to try medications again. I had already decided long ago I wasn't interested in taking medications again unless there was a strong guarantee that the agent would be effective without annoying side effects. But it was nice to be able to point the article out when the subject of medications was brought up by therapists. I've read about CBT. And I think a previous therapist I had was using those techniques. I wasn't a fan. This isn't my first go around with therapy. Maybe one day I'll meet the perfect therapist for me. But I don't think this one was it. Or, as I think very likely, it's more probable that just as medications haven't worked for me counseling doesn't work either. Not everyone can be helped. I'm tired of coming out of a session either feeling it was useless or feeling more depressed than I was when I went in. Gman