Sean Y

Thanks, guys. Amazing and very hot is good too.😊

@xaxand @Sedtruik, thank you. Will definitely check them out. best, Sean

Any info on Brian in SF (https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/4771/) Mike (https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/6025/) or Paul (https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/1229/)? thank you Sean

Try this site: http://www.gaycitiesasia.com/listing-category/massage/ (quite a few listed though many of the spa websites are not active) Most of the higher end m4m spas will have an iPad or at minimum a desktop station with available therapists to chose from. Depending on hours and how busy they are and who is onsite, you may only have 3-4 to chose from. The massage in Shanghai tends to be pretty strong, especially on the legs. Just make sure to ask with discretion the spa expectations (some have minimum tips and some are all inclusive with any extra tips) http://www.shyispa.com/

http://www.utopia-asia.com/shanmasa.htm

It’s not a store. It’s an online service (sorry not sure where you’re at). I’ve used instacart to have things delivered to AZ, Las Vegas, NJ, OKC, etc. Go online and type instacart and enter zip code to see if they have a set-up.

I’ve been using Instacart at work and it’s totally awesome - they even have a year subscription program so I can get things delivered without service charge. I know Costco is one of the store as is Safeway, Wholefood, etc. in different locations. You tell them what you want and schedule when you want it delivered. Pretty cool.

Has haaaaa. When i was 20, anyone over 30 was hella old. Payback kinda sucks.

https://www.realclearscience.com/blog/2018/10/25/penis_enlargement_is_mostly_pseudoscientific_bs.html Not something I was ever interested in but ...

Our perception of risk is very funny and personal. I mean, more people die from car accidents than plane crashes or terrorist attacks but most people drive or are in cars everyday. We know the correlations between high blood pressure, cholesterol, obesity, tobacco smoking, etc. and cancer or strokes or heart attacks (definitely higher than 10% risk), yet we are fine with eating French fries, potato chips and fatty desserts (all my weaknesses) without much thoughts. So for some, reducing the transmission risk by 90% is pretty good. But if we were to say the failure rate for plane crashing or the failure rate of car brakes malfunctioning is 10%, no one would get on an airplane or buy that car because that risk is too high, even for something as important as needed transportation.

Hand job. A wank! A tug!

Thanks, Drained... I do hear you and feel your pain. I can understand your frustrations. But I have some problems with your assumptions. Like I said, I’m a first gen, literally fresh off the boat (boat people refugee) who grew up in the mid-west, went to a predominantly white school, and friends were all white. I don’t think there was any pretending that I was white or trying to be white. We ate asian food at home, i brought homemade Vietnamese sandwiches or Vietnamese sticky rice (soi) for field trips because i hated wonder bread (hate how it sticks to the roof of your mouth) and we brought egg rolls and fried wontons or fried rice to potlucks. (My mom is an awesome cook and trust me, what we brought were super popular with my white friends - and their parents have called me after I graduated to have her make them for their family get togethers. Yes, I speak better English than Chinese or Vietnamese, but that’s not by choice. I arrived in the US when I was 8 y.o. after spending over a year in a refugee camp. I only had a 2nd grader education in my native language whereas I had many years of private ESL tutoring by a trained English teacher (it helps that I was the only non-English speaking student so I was very lucky). Growing up, there were very few people to speak Chinese/Vietnamese to so English it is. It’s not because I wanted to be white. What’s my point - check your assumptions. I’m sure I’m not the only Asian who doesn’t fit in your brush stroke. I’m assimilated but growing up, I wanted to look like Leslie Cheung, then Aaron Kwon or Jimmy Lim - they were so pretty. In college, I wanted long lashes like my friend Shaista who also has the most beautiful blue eyes - btw, she’s not white - she’s Persian. My current boyfriend is an Asian who’s tall and buff - not because he wants to be white. He grew up in the project in Sacramento so his friends were mostly African Americans. And being poor, their fun time was playing sports - especially pick-up basketball (did I mention he’s a 5’11” gay Asian). You are right that it’s hard being a minority in the US. But remember, we are a minority so yeah, the prevailing marketing materials will be targeting the majority (whites). I can complain about not seeing myself in them or I can do something about it. As mentioned previously, the awesomeness of current technology means we’re no longer bound by mainstream offerings. Some of the best and most popular YouTube stars are Asians. And seriously, we control our twitter feeds and tumblr accounts and postings etc. We can push or create or represent. And yeah, the white models in ads, on tv and in movies are gorgeous and hot, but ummm, they are not hot because they are white. No one said they are hot because they are white - they are selected because that’s the demographics advertisers are targeting. These models are super young, fit, completely proportional and symmetrical and selected for those reasons. They are chosen specific because they are the “elite” meaning if you look around, 99.9% of the people, regardless of whatever race do not look like them. Same can be said of hot Asian models and black, Latino, Indian, etc. and same of the women. I can agree that we don’t normally see diversity in our mainstream advertisement because the ads are mostly targeting the majority (which in this country is still white). But i don’t agree it’s the whiteness that make the models beautiful. And if you think that’s the main reason, that’s racism (external or internalized). I don’t really understand the need to just “pass” - what am i passing? Do you mean being mainstream? Or do you mean white? I will never pass as white nor do i want to. I’m not even sure why I would ever feel the need to. Or do you mean be desired by whites? Is that the litmus test for being beautiful - to score a white guy? Does he have to be gorgeous or any white guy will do? Or is it to be desired period, because not being or feeling desired is not an Asian only state. I know tons of cute single white boys who complain constantly about not finding the right one. And apparently, being white is not the answer either. I’m kinda not cool with blaming the unfit gyrating Asians for our perceived image in the eyes of white men. I mean it’s not the Asianess that made them act that way. And have you seen all the other non-Asians doing the same thing? Racists will find any excuses so they don’t need your help. I mean, we had one of the best president of all time who is brilliant and well loved worldwide, and he’s black. Did that change how racists view blacks? They still call the cops on blacks as if by being black they are responsible for all the crimes. They still blame immigrants for what one Latino did but mentioned nothing about all the others crimes committed by whites. I don’t hold all white people responsible for Hitler, Lenin or even Trump. And I don’t think badly of the gay white community for the likes of Milo Yiannopoulos, Kevin Spacey and Peter Thiel. Because if we do, there are tons of horrible atrocities committed by white Americans against people of color - such as the Tuskegee Syphilis Study (where US injected syphilis into African Americans to see the effect of untreated syphilis in the black community). The US apologized for the atrocities but I don’t see white people taking the blame. I don’t apologize for the actions of some of my fellow Asians - are they embarrassing? Probably but not because they are Asians - it’s because I’m embarrassed to do that in public period, regardless of whatever race. I think they are brave enough to do dance, regardless of other people’s judgements as long as they don’t hurt other people and not sexual predators. And lastly, you can’t assume that the Asians on Grindrs don’t show their faces because they are ashame of their race - maybe they are not out or want their friends to know they are looking for hook-ups. Or maybe race is not an important criteria. Seriously, they can lie about their race all they want, but if it’s physical hook-up, there’s no way the white guy’s going to not know he’s Asian. So please check your assumptions on this - because it makes no sense. OK - forgive me for my rants - you can tell I’m a bit passionate about this.

Hmmmm, I’m first gen, foreign born Asian, but grew up in the Midwest. I think I’m pretty Americanized (I mean i speak English better than I do any other languages and i probably speak English better than some of my white friends, ha ahaaa - yeah, I was the editor for our yearbook and literary review mag.) That said, I don’t want to be white - in HS, all my friends were white and i was the only asian in my class (it is the mid-west). TBH, I’m not sure I want to “fit in” with whites only - i didn’t bleach my hair or lighten my skin or change my eye colors. I love my Asianess - i love that I have to shave only once a month (my face, not my butt hole, ha ahaaa). Now in SF, I love my multi-culti friends - they have the best food and best music EVER!!! So no, don’t wanna be white, don’t have interested in being white and don’t want to just hang out with whites. They are welcomed to hang out with me if they want but hey, we’ll be listening to R&B or hip hop, we’ll have spicy curries and egg rolls, sushi’s and chicken feet, and ummm, they are expected to dance (and I mean hip movements and not just shuffling feet) and sing karaoke. Sorry I don’t agree nor accept that the standard of beauty is just white. Buffness is not owned by whites. And being tanned is actually being less “white” . I think standard of beauty is changing - hopefully the gay community is adapting. Castro clones are just one type and so are the gym bunnies with with chicken size chest and skinny legs. I’m fond of the lumberjacks and the panda bears. And I don’t understand the stupidity of Asians being each other’s competitions - seriously are we setting each other up as completely interchangeable so the only real importance is our asianess? Why are other Asians the only competitors and not the white guy over there or the hot Latinos. there’s no limited resources of gay men to date. Maybe because I’m older now that I’m no longer a threat. Or maybe it’s because I have no problem showing them love: I will tell an Asian he’s hot! I have no problem telling the white dude that his Asian guy is hot! And we’ll both laughed and say, damn!!! And I’ll definitely tell Asian couples that they are so cute together!!!!

In the 90’s I worked with young gays as a sex educator. We say, there’s really no absolute safe sex and some one would raise their hands and say, well, abstinence. And we would respond, yes, abstinence is probably the safest but it’s really not absolute because, honestly, teaching abstinence as a prevention never worked against teen pregnancy or anti-STD so it’ll definitely not going to work against HIV or any other disease prevention. All else, there is some level of risk involved. Like TruthBTold says, know your risk, understand what you’re willing to take, and please please please, know these risks before you’re in a situation where that little head is getting too big, and you may not be thinking clearly. And most importantly, respect other people’s decisions. I worked with run away youths who are living on the street: the risk of freezing or starving to death while on the street is so much more immediate than potentially dying from HIV or getting Alzheimer in old age due to some STDs. We give them facts: HJ and frottage and massage are less risky than BJ which is less risky than active partner with condom which is less risky than passive partner with condom which is less risky than active partner without condom which is slightly less risky than passive partner without condom which is less risky than being beaten up by your john or pimp or angry husband for refusing sex without a condom, etc. etc. etc. Just know what your risks are, what you’re willing to take, and what you’re not willing to take. And know that this is a spectrum - you can change your mind. If I’m bored, I may do HJ or BJ with a 3 or I may pitch for a 5 but won’t catch for anything less than a 7. If I’m horny and desperate, I may pitch for a 3 and catch for a 5. Just know your limit and know what you’ll need to do to take care of yourself before and afterward: get tested, don’t floss before oral and take care of your gums and any open sores, where to get information if you’re infected, etc. etc. I had clients who sero converted and it made me sad but I understood. I got them help. I had clients who passed away because of violence or because of drugs or because of depression or suicide - and that was not because of HIV. These were young adults and they made their decisions based on their limits and circumstances and I respected their decisions. You guys are full empowered adults, so I’m sure you can own your decision and take care of your consequences. Just don’t force others to do it your way. No means no - and it’s not just about permission to have sex. It’s also about someone’s risk boundaries and how far they are willing to go with you. It may be up for discussion but it’s not up to you to decide for them.

Boiledeggz, you make some excellent points! My experiences were really from the early 90s when our point of references for standard of beauty was super limited (printed pages and tv/movies) and there really wasn’t much representation. And as mentioned in my first email, we now have hot images of Asians next to men of all races on most sites. We even have uber-hot gay Asian surgeon on Grey’s Anatomy!!!! So yes, we have definitely come a long way! And just as we still continue to fight homophobia, we still fighting the old school perception that Asians are not hot, not sexual, and not marketable/able to carry a mainstream move. Just google how many articles were written about how Hollywood was taken by surprise by how big a hit Crazy Rich Asians was... Same could be said about how surprise people were about how successful Black Panther was or Girl Trip (not because wow, someone other than a white star carried a successful movie!) And thank you for pointing out that there are so many sexy Asian guys who are built, successful, and hot and have no problem dating other Asians or any other races!!! I myself think Asians are mega hot - I mean seriously, look at me. Ha ahaaa. j/k. Maybe. So what are my points: racism still exist, and even with all the hot Asians on Twitter, Grindr, and Jackd etc., there are still people who think there are sexy Asians. We still have tons of Asians who have internalized this hatred and discriminate against themselves. I mean, seriously, we had one of the best president ever and he’s black; and people are calling cops just because someone is black! Hopefully it’ll be less and less - and from your message, we’re on the winning side of progress. And we still need to affirm that it’s not OK to post “no Asians” because it’s racist, even if it’s your sexual preference. And let’s not deny we’re beyond racism, that it doesn’t exist. Telling someone they are not good enough because of their race is hurtful and it exists and we need to help make it stop. And to all my brother Asians, why the F* do you want to sleep with someone who doesn’t want to sleep with you - I mean seriously, how many men are available on Grindr, Jackd and all those other apps who would be hot for you? What are you going to do with a limp dick - why work that hard? Ha haaaa. I want to tell you how much i love love love modernity. I mean seriously, i had to leave Missouri and come all the way to SF and go to Chinatown to see a magazine with a cute Asian (and that magazine was from Hong Kong and in Chinese, which I can’t read). I don’t even need to sneak down to some dark park or sit in some smelly old bathroom for a possible hook-up. Just bloody turn on YouTube and I can stream gay Thai romance, KPop hotties, Chinese etc. not to mention Asian porns or tumblrs. Turn on the app, and i can access all the available boys nearby. I don’t even have to drive or walk any where - seriously sex delivered to my door. Has haaa. So yes, Boiledeggz, you are absolutely right - there shouldn’t be any doubt for any one that hot Asians exist and that there are tons of hot Asians who are interested in other Asians, or in any other combinations other than rice on potatoes. PS. Boiledeggz, love your handle!!!!