myophile

Ten years ago, almost to the day, 80 lbs overweight, and faced with a diagnosis of sleep apnea (on top of high blood pressure, high cholesterol, pre-diabetes, and a bad back), I struck a bargain with my doctor: I would lose twenty pounds, and he would take the dreaded CPAP machine off the table. He agreed, and ten days before Thanksgiving — because why make it easy on myself? — I started eating at a deficit, and began the process of totally reforming my diet. A decade later, I’ve kept the weight off, and “cured” myself of various ailments. I’ve kept the fat off, and added some substantial muscle, in part by not sweating the holidays. I THOROUGHLY enjoy a ginormous carb-heavy Thanksgiving feast every year (and on other occasions!) with friends and family; but then I get right back to healthy moderate eating. And I try really, really hard not to slack off at the gym.

WOOOOOOF!

CANNOT WAIT! 💪🏻🥪💪🏻

GOALS!

Oh FUCK yes, you are correct!

The world needs more “annoying” optimists, big guy! 💪🏻😘

For my money, this pair-up of Big Joey and Gauge is the hottest muscle worship video ever made: https://thegay.com/videos/718233/massive-muscle-body-worship-gauge-joey-jordan2/

I’ve seen him a couple of times — a very sweet guy, and ginormous, but for what he charges, I expect a little more engagement. I totally respect that he feels exhausted and crappy while prepping for competition, but like others, I’ve found his energy level a bit disappointing.

Ho. Lee. FUCK!!!!

Oh, dear — I suppose it IS the most likely explanation for the unnatural persistence and continued improvement of his beauty and physique (LOL). Vin’s “Dorian Gray” painting would be horrifying!

Fuuuuuuck. He just rocketed to the top of my To Do list!

No hiding those boulder-shoulders, big guy!

Incredible, babe! By the way, I’m sure I speak for everyone here when I say that although your bathroom selfies are hot AF, is there ANY chance of some proper photo documentation of the New and Improved Vin once you’ve touched down? Honestly, it should be recorded for posterity!

Dear man: we are all very, VERY lucky that you have chosen to monetize your physique in this way!

Only YOU could turn a set of leg extensions into hardcore porn! 💪🏻😍

YOWZA!!! Coming in hot, babe!!! 💪🏻😍

😘

“Damn! You fine!“ what Mr.E said!!!

WOOOOOOF!

Coffee. Breakfast (2 tbsp natural peanut butter on low carb pita). Process plans for the day with husband. Check email. Solve NYT crossword. Catch up on whatever fresh hell is brewing in DC or elsewhere. Feed cat. Shower, brush teeth, etc. Make bed. Head to gym (trainer MWF, solo cardio at Planet Fitness T&R, sometimes S).

You do realize that he’s built like your avatar, don’t you? Also, maybe take the body-shaming rhetoric down a notch?

Those current IG pictures are the ones we’re referencing. To those of us into serious muscle, your “old slab of beef” is actually a twunk.

Ironically, though impressively buff, he’s actually not that huge currently, and might even be natty.

“Unfortunately”??? Au contraire, in his current giant shredded monster bodybuilder state he just rocketed to the top of my TO DO list.

You make a great point about the separate-but-equal aspects of these friendships! It’s hard to talk about — the “service” and the friendship aren’t two opposing factors, but we’ve all been taught to think about them that way. It’s a shame — we need a new vocabulary!