Guy Fawkes

I'm sorry but the rules specifically say: "One per customer per day!"

One final push to help you get past those pearly gates... A couple is in bed sleeping when there's a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. The husband rolls over and looks at the clock, and it's half past 3 in the morning." I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. So he drags himself out of bed, goes downstairs, opens the door, and there's a man standing there. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. "Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?" "No, get lost. It's half past three and I was in bed," says the man as he slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tell his wife what happened and she says, "That wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's house to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?" "But the guy was drunk," says the husband. "It doesn't matter," says the wife." He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him." So the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere. He shouts, "Hey, do you still want a push?" And he hears a voice cry out, "Yeah, please." So, still being unable to see the stranger he shouts, "Where are you?" The drunk replies, "Over here, on the swing."

Specific to the Blogger Platform at this time. https://support.google.com/blogger/answer/6170671 http://www.zdnet.com/article/google-bans-explicit-adult-content-from-blogger-blogs/

Thinking about you Jackhammer... A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.. "How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something." The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=milking

Considering that review page has no links on it (normal for a retired listing) color me confused. http://healthyhopes.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/funny-pictures-this-kitten-is-confused.jpg?w=244&h=300

He told me that he was leaving NYC and retiring. Must have changed his mind. http://www.rentboy.com/Listing.aspx?lid=386856 http://www.daddysreviews.com/review/justin_6_nyc http://media.desura.com/images/members/1/909/908696/085.JPG

Nice Tan!

Sorry, the M.A. Looked at across the room at me and said: "Your negative!". I could give you her number if you want. The round of applause was enough for me. Kidding aside, I always act as if we're both Positive.

and now back to the show... [video=youtube;xVlZ-94MyrQ]

Did we mention that we really, REALLY missed you in Palm Springs?

Bottom + Bottom = 69

Donate them to Daddy? http://www.working-well.org/articles/article_images/nonchalant.jpg

It's the Law; Use a Pun, Go to Jail!

Why Adam, my wonderful little forest elf, I believe you've got it! Is everybody else ignoring it or did my sense of humor fall short? Bravo!

I'm not worried about the Handcuffs... Likewise the concept of being forced into cohabitation with bunch of horny, younger men in a confined space doesn't bother me... Five and Six digit fines; that's a different story.

Daddy Said: "No Xylophilia!"

No, but what a cool idea...I'll put it on the wish list at the author's site.

Trolls have been a "Feature" of the Internet long before most of you have been around. If you would like a historical prospective, check out the anti-troll FAQ: http://www.hyphenologist.co.uk/killfile/anti_troll_faq.htm Here are some helpful tips for dealing with Trolls: Don't Feed the Trolls....They only eat humans, especially young humans. Offering them food will usually result in loss of fingers, hands, arms, and sometimes heads. Don't Wake the Trolls...They are vane about their names. Mention their name and they will wake up. Trolls are grumpy when awaken, and usually hungry...See the first rule. Don't Play with the Trolls...Remember how Cats play with mice? That's how Trolls play with humans, and remember what happens to the mouse once play time is over! Don't Teach a Troll...They are very set in their ways, They get very angry very fast. When they get angry they play. See previous rule. Don't Argue with a Troll...They are very set in their ways, They get very angry very fast. When they get angry they play. See previous rule. If a Troll shows up, the safest course of action is to ignore the Troll. Slip away slowly and very quietly, What ever you do don't attract their attention.

Click the Image button (looks like a mountain with a moon rising) in the Toolbar and Enter the URL in for the image: For example: Was entered as: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5b/Greater_coat_of_arms_of_the_United_States.svg/170px-Greater_coat_of_arms_of_the_United_States.svg.png