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I've done well by living below my means for many, many years. Working for the federal government has been great for me. I'm paid well, have a good work-life balance, and between my federal pension, retirement account (TSP which is basically the government's 401(k) program) and lots of saving over the years I should be in good shape to retire early in a few years with more than enough money for the rest of my life. Having a financial planner has been very helpful as well. Also, not everyone here hires pricey escorts several times a year as the premise of this thread indicates. Frankly I can't even remember the last time I hired an escort. I have enjoyed many trips to Asia over the last 15 years or so with lots of visits to massage places and gogo bars.

and you're not doing anything wrong anyway. Coffeeshop is a good idea. Or one of the guys I was seeing regularly would just meet me in the little park across the street from my building and we'd sit on a bench there to chat

it's like all of those boys on tiktok and other social media - they all look exactly the same

we're on our way to becoming the next Japan. They haven't been having sex for a while now for a variety of reasons.

Maybe Grindr?

Actually my guess is that most of these guys have no idea what the "going rate" happens to be. As we've discussed upthread, few of them would want to consider themselves to be escorts or prostitutes. As I think I said previously the differing expectations between the "baby" and "daddy" can be a real impediment to these relationships working. I think many (most?) of them have a fantasy that the world is full of rich daddies who will pay all of their bills and expect little to nothing in return. These guys are mainly not pros. They just know somebody who mentioned the app to them and they thought it sounded like easy money. The guy I've been getting to know is a total rookie. I actually don't remember us talking about any particular dollar amount at any time. He did ask how I do the arrangement and I told him I pay per meeting which he said seemed sensible. But that was it. We've had a couple of coffee dates and I Venmo'd my typical amount for such a meeting to him. He's not seemed put off by the amount at all. We text each other mostly small talk most days. So it's a bit unusual for me. He even gave me a small gift at our second meeting. So it's like building a friendship. I think he's basically completely sexually inexperienced. So we'll see where things go. But I really like him and he seems to like me so I am happy to see how it all plays out. But I agree that discussing the money aspect can be difficult for both sides. I'd like the be realistic, but I'm not sure I am. I also think it matters what the baby is offering. If there's a physical aspect (like an escort) then certainly I expect to pay somewhere in the neighborhood of escort money for such a meeting. But for a simple coffee date or just spending time together without a physical component I expect to pay much less. I have friends I could spend time with for free, but as part of the "courting" process I am fine with some coffee dates. For that I generally pay $100 for a couple of hours.

I've been using Dashlane for a few years

If you're looking for a boyfriend it probably makes sense to find one where you live, not going to Asia to snatch one off the street for a whole host of reasons. Where I live (Washington, DC) there's a fairly active group for Asian men and their admirers. But from what I understand there is a lot of stigma. Lots of socially awkward older white men looking for twinky Asian boys. But relationships do form. I also know several Asian guys who have white partners including a pair of doctors. I think finding some one in your socioeconomic class as noted above is probably key to something that lasts.

does that count as a massage video? cute body, but headless people never do much for me

I love these so much. I always want to see the guys from the cubicle next door

Good for you. I find that a huge amount of the guys who contact me are not local and many from different countries even. So I don't even bother to interact with most of them...unless they have really good photos or something in their profile piques my interest. Weeding out the scammers can take some work. For sure use the search function and contact the guys who you find interesting

Yes. you're never going to meet them IRL anyway, so what difference does it make. If they're hot and put on a good show, who cares?

GTM?

you can use any kind of non-sexual photo you want I think for a lot of the young guys they think they can make a lot of money for nothing. Some of the guys I've met mentioned that the site was recommended to them by female friends who are all apparently meeting lots of rich men who don't want anything from them - or at least they don't tell their friends what they're doing to make money. The expectations on both sides frequently do not line up. There are some guys who genuinely like older men and understand what both sides are typically interested in - money and attention for the baby and sex and intimacy for the daddy. I'm guessing they do well, but I suspect most guys on both sides aren't especially successful in finding what they want. And so many scammers on both ends that it's tough for everyone who's not a scammer. Lots of babies who are not conventionally attractive I would think have a difficult time getting a foot in the door. Although I suppose there are so many different tastes out there it's just a matter of finding the right person. I know I am not the most physically attractive, but that's why I expect to have to pay for some experiences. But being a nice person and a good listener works well for me. There are lots of lonely people out there including some cute boys who appreciate having some one to talk to. I like both the guys who know the score and are more on the escort side of the spectrum and the guys who are a bit more work.

there seem to be several college swimmers on SA. And more frat boys than you can count

despite my complaints about this site, I may have actually had some success. With my subscription running out I met a couple of guys on the app - one of whom I had a very pleasant coffee date with last week. He's a very sweet young guy who I actually see a lot of myself in when I was that age. We've been texting throughout the ensuing week and expect to meet again soon. I don't mind taking things slow with him. And the other guy I've also had some very nice online conversations with. We haven't met yet but plan to - he's working two jobs so doesn't have a huge amount of free time.

The gay tour company I used for many trips in SE Asia (Purple Dragon) went out of business a couple of years ago. But it may be that there are others out there. I was looking at India gay tours last night for when we can go places again and there are a few options it looks like. Utopia-asia.com is a good resource for that part of the world. I guess when you're traveling with a guide it's not exactly "solo" since you have somebody with you at least part of the time. In places with a real language barrier it's comforting, and it also makes it easier to get out of the main cities easily since you have transportation somebody who can interpret for you. But in big cities I find it's easy enough generally to get around and there's enough English speakers, signs, etc.

I travel solo all the time. I have taken many, many trips solo to Asia. There used to be a company based in Bangkok that organized private tours where it was just me with a driver and/or guide. Lots of great trips over the years all over SE Asia. I've done a couple of solo trips to Sri Lanka where it was just me and my guide/driver who is now a friend. I travel around Europe solo frequently. Also Australia and Canada. Taiwan, Singapore and South Korea are great too and easy to do on your own. I am so used to it now that I'm not sure I could travel with another person now. For sure your personality will make a difference. I'm an introvert so I don't meet a lot of people when I travel and it's generally not a problem. I enjoy my own company so I keep to myself mostly. Extroverts who need someone to talk to all the time might struggle a bit.

he's cute. he says he's vaccinated? health care worker maybe?

and his sister is beloved while he is generally not well liked. If news of him hurting her gets widespread attention the protests will probably escalate

it could be hidden cameras. they are certainly stationary cameras so there is not a cameraman

it seems a bit odd that the only person whose face isn't blurred is the "client". And the massage next door is always moving along without hanky panky. Personally I love this series so I'm not sure I really care if it's actors or not. But as I said somewhere up thread it really makes me miss Asia.

I love his messy hair

certainly some cultures are more open to some things. Thailand is actually quite conservative but has a reputation of guys not being afraid to fool around with each other. They don't have the religious hangups that some other places do. They like to have fun, and if it feels good, why not?

this is a good question. Every twink on Twitter seems to have an OF now. But I think most of them discover that it's difficult to get anyone to pay for more than a month. One guy I've been intrigued by is https://onlyfans.com/heycumere - a young medical student with an insane body. His little teaser videos on Twitter are very enticing. I think he mostly just posts videos of himself jerking off but also has a couple with another guy who is equally well-built. Here's his twitter