My first thought was the massage/playdate ran more than 90 minutes, so an additional fee might be warranted unless the session ran something like 100 or 105 minutes, in which case that would be a completely unreasonable request. However, he asked you to fuck him (which you did) despite you stating that you wanted to do something different. Frankly, he behaved like a hookup. Sounds like the additional time should be on his dime.
Regarding how to get what you want next time, I'd suggest you first find a couple of guys whom you find physically attractive and whose ads you find appealing. Then, ask for feedback here. Make your selection based on the feedback you receive.
Someone mentioned @Rod Hagen in LA. I'd also recommend him. Although I am by no means new to hiring I had a great time with him. He happens to be both a trained massage therapist and an escort. He also listens to what his clients ask for. Had I not moved away from Souther California we would be getting together on a regular basis.