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Escorts that "ghost"

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mentalkink Collaborator

mentalkink

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I have recently run into "ghosting " by a couple of well known highly regarded escorts I contacted based upon conversations on this site and the reviews I have read on Daddy's and Rentmen. It perplexes me when you have initiated contact exchange 2 or 3 emails and then radio silence. What gives?

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big-n-tall Grand Master

big-n-tall

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Don't take it personally. If someone you want to see doesn't respond (as has been said a million times), it could any number of reasons. Move on to the next one. Stressing, trying to figure out why is rather pointless. You'll probably never know why for sure.

 

The only thing you can do is if there is a commonality in your approach after you emailed the 2nd or 3rd time... change that approach. Because we don't know what you ask or say to these guys... it's hard to speculate if it's something you may ask that turns the escort off.

 

There are way too many escorts in the sea to stress about a relative few who don't respond.

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big-n-tall Grand Master

big-n-tall

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Actually both stated they would let me know regarding their availability, I work from home so it's easy for me to be available and I tend to work around other's schedules that way. I know that "shit happens" and always give the benefit of the doubt.

 

Honestly, that sounds like maybe they don’t want to see you. Again I can’t speculate how the conversation has gone between you and the escort. However, if the escort is in your area and he tells you I’ll let you know my availability, after asking for a meet up time, that seems a bit usual. The only times a working guy told me they’d let me know their availability is when they are planning to come to my area from out of town... and they told me well ahead of when their plans are finalized. Or when, I try to book last minute (which is extremely rare for me).

 

Are you asking them for a definite time to meet or being ambiguous about it? It seems as though since you work from home and your availability is more open you aren’t being decisive about a time. In that case, @seattlebottom may be correct and they think you aren’t as serious or a time waster.

 

Again don’t take the ghosting personally. Try someone else, but maybe change your approach if you are being ambiguous about a meeting time.

Edited by big-n-tall
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Reisr30 Grand Master

+ Reisr30

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Something similar happened to me with a well reviewed escort other forum members rave about. I sent a polite email about setting up a time to speak, he responded positively and went silent when I tried to confirm. I just moved on; I decided in the end it’s his loss/issue and not mine. Plenty of other good guys out there who won’t flake.

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VictorPowers Mentor

+ VictorPowers

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Speaking from my own personal experience, I've definitely let people slip between the cracks. I'd say these instances were not intentional, but it can happen. For me, RM messages and personal emails seem to be the most common ways where someone can be lost in the shuffle. Maybe this info can add some insight from a provider perspective.

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matt842 Community Regular

matt842

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Speaking from my own personal experience, I've definitely let people slip between the cracks. I'd say these instances were not intentional, but it can happen. For me, RM messages and personal emails seem to be the most common ways where someone can be lost in the shuffle. Maybe this info can add some insight from a provider perspective.

Agreed. I have had this happen with quite a few masseurs, and at least half the time when I follow up, the response is an apology for having missed the earlier message. If you're really interested in meeting someone, it's not a bad idea to write again. If that doesn't get a response either, as others said it's time to move on.

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LaffingBear Veteran

LaffingBear

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Happens to everyone by everyone.

 

Recent months, happened to me by

  • Rentguys
  • Electrician who came, wrote a bid, but stopped responding when I returned the signed bid.
  • The service used to clean gutters annually for past 10 years... provided quote but wouldnt respond to multiple messages to schedule this year.
  • Two handyman workers who came by, walked through potential projects, stated interest, then disappeared
  • 80% of people who say they're going to purchase anything I've listed on eBay, OfferUp, Craigslist, etc (99% of all enquirers)
  • Countless people who've submitted resumes when Im recruiting for my clients, who schedule phone interviews, never call, don't answer, and fail to respond to follow up.

Ghosting is the new norm.

 

Craigslist is reportedly adding a category to their personals section. There'll be men4women, women4women, men4men, and ghost4ghost.

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Cyd_StVincent Enthusiast

Cyd_StVincent

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Happens to everyone by everyone.

 

Recent months, happened to me by

  • Rentguys
  • Electrician who came, wrote a bid, but stopped responding when I returned the signed bid.
  • The service used to clean gutters annually for past 10 years... provided quote but wouldnt respond to multiple messages to schedule this year.
  • Two handyman workers who came by, walked through potential projects, stated interest, then disappeared
  • 80% of people who say they're going to purchase anything I've listed on eBay, OfferUp, Craigslist, etc (99% of all enquirers)
  • Countless people who've submitted resumes when Im recruiting for my clients, who schedule phone interviews, never call, don't answer, and fail to respond to follow up.

Ghosting is the new norm.

 

Craigslist is reportedly adding a category to their personals section. There'll be men4women, women4women, men4men, and ghost4ghost.

 

OMG lol Craigslist is truly the land of the ghost. Four times a year I'll decide I want sex or furniture from there but in 8 years I've come away with one chest of draws, one pretty odd threesome and a guy who showed up and was so unlike his picture that I couldn't figure out what he was doing at my house.

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cautious Enthusiast

cautious

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I’d also add from my experience with a well reviewed escort that I think highly of, sometimes it’s just that they are inconsistently unreliable.

 

When I faced a similar situation many on this board offered helpful advice and I chalked it up to “for whatever reason, he just doesn’t want to engage anymore”. Low and behold a few weeks later, he reached out apologetically. Since then he’s been fairly apologetic about any delays in communication and has been pretty engaged, only to have him miss a recent appointment again.

 

So while it may be that they’re not interested, or quite possibly may be that they just can’t be counted on and you need to keep that in mind and not take it personally.

 

Then you decide for yourself if you can deal with the unknown going forward.

 

For me, if it was my cleaning person, after two occasions I’d find a new one. For some reason this particular escort gets a few more chances from me but every time reminds me to keep a healthy emotional distance despite thinking he’s a great guy.

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Eric Hassan Mentor

+ Eric Hassan

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Actually both stated they would let me know regarding their availability, I work from home so it's easy for me to be available and I tend to work around other's schedules that way. I know that "shit happens" and always give the benefit of the doubt.

 

So, like everyone else, I don't know the details of your communication. Speaking from my own experience, when someone approaches me and says they'd like to get together, I hope they'll have a time and day in mind. When someone says to me they're flexible and I can choose, I always toss it back to them and ask them for at least a day and time frame (for example, "anytime Tuesday afternoon"). This is because otherwise, I would be listing off my appointments and obligations, and that's not something I want to share. Your guys might have felt like your request was too vague, and either you weren't serious, or they might have felt like suddenly you made it their job to figure out your life. Think about it this way - if you want reservations at a restaurant, you would call them and ask for a day and time. They might have it, or might not, or might counter-offer, but you would never call a restaurant and ask for them to choose your reservation day and time for you. I know it's possible that you offered some time ideas, and I know you said they would get back to you and they didn't,. I'm thinking you might have more luck with requesting a more concrete appointment time - even if the guy can't do the time you requested, you've at least let him know you're serious about getting together, and you provide an opening to negotiate. We are used to being flexible for you, and consider that part of the work - allow your flexibility to work for YOU, not us.

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mentalkink Collaborator

mentalkink

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Wow I can't believe people ask to hire you as an assassin , that's fucked up . I am sure that Rentmen is similar to craiglist with the legitimacy of responses running about 10% of the total the rest being BS or jack off fantasies. It gets frustrating when you have the funds available but no one is getting back to you to do the job lol.

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VictorPowers Mentor

+ VictorPowers

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Wow I can't believe people ask to hire you as an assassin , that's fucked up . I am sure that Rentmen is similar to craiglist with the legitimacy of responses running about 10% of the total the rest being BS or jack off fantasies. It gets frustrating when you have the funds available but no one is getting back to you to do the job lol.

It'd be very interesting to compile some statistics on conversion rate of inquiries.

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