The Escort Disclaimer

[marylander1940]

It's simply this:

 

Insinuating sex acts with money involved for a set amount of time together

 

Vs

 

Helping someone become a better version of themselves through health improvements with money involved for a set amount of time together.

 

 

When someone asks you over the phone are you more top or bottom how do you answer?

[+ PapaTony]

Bingo! It's not a fool-proof disclaimer nor does it claim to be but it's better than nothing. I will also note that many jurisdictions do not pursue higher end providers, especially men as we tend to be a lower priority. There are some jurisdictions where officers are told to leave us alone and let us do our thing.

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We'll be right back after this brief commercial break:

 

The hottest scene I’ve ever watched. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve cum thanks to you @Kurtis Wolfe

https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5900522b21681

 

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[+ Avalon]

Google it. You will find as many answers at the states.

 

https://prostitution.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=000119

[marylander1940]

https://prostitution.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=000119

 

There a federal, state, city, and even zoning issues.

 

Books could be written based on your question...

[+ Lance_Navarro]

I think you have confused sex therapists and sex surrogates. I'm not sure there are any sex surrogates anymore anyway and they work solely on specific issues, like impotence or premature ejaculation.

They now call then Surrogate Partners, rather than Sex Surrogates, but either way, I am one of them. In fact, I'm the only gay male Surrogate Partner Therapy practitioner that's currently taking new clients in Northern California. I just went through training back in April, so I'm still considered an intern.

 

There aren't nearly as many as there were in the 70's, during the hay day of Masters & Johnson and before the AIDS epidemic. There's a great documentary on Netflix called

that shows a British man and woman who each come to the US to work with a Surrogate Partner. There's of course also the movie

, starring Helen Hunt. There are more Surrogates in the bay area than anywhere else, in fact, I'm hosting our monthly gathering next week.

[Walker1]

What is a sex surrogate/partner? Is it someone who coaches you to be more open/comfortable in bed or deal with physical intimacy issues. is it more like a shrink or more physical?

[+ Lance_Navarro]

What is a sex surrogate/partner? Is it someone who coaches you to be more open/comfortable in bed or deal with physical intimacy issues. is it more like a shrink or more physical?

With Surrogate Partner Therapy there is both a therapist and a Surrogate that are working with the client. They work with the client separately but communicate with one another to evaluate progress. As a Surrogate I take them through exercises in touch, sensate focus, relaxation, body awareness, and slowly build on the emotional and physical intimacy. For some the intimacy has to build very slowly, for example, someone that has a history of abuse or molestation, it might take months of seeing them weekly, just for them to be comfortable undressing.

 

The ultimate goal is usually some type of sexual intercourse, after all the purpose of the therapy is for them to be able to take their knowledge and new found confidence out into the world and foster healthy relationships. The therapy ends either when the client decides, or when the goal has been reached and there is a period of at least 6 months, when the client and Surrogate are not to be in contact, so that they can "go it on there own". Check out the website IPSA.us for more info.

[+ Avalon]

With Surrogate Partner Therapy there is both a therapist and a Surrogate that are working with the client. They work with the client separately but communicate with one another to evaluate progress. As a Surrogate I take them through exercises in touch, sensate focus, relaxation, body awareness, and slowly build on the emotional and physical intimacy. For some the intimacy has to build very slowly, for example, someone that has a history of abuse or molestation, it might take months of seeing them weekly, just for them to be comfortable undressing.

 

The ultimate goal is usually some type of sexual intercourse, after all the purpose of the therapy is for them to be able to take their knowledge and new found confidence out into the world and foster healthy relationships. The therapy ends either when the client decides, or when the goal has been reached and there is a period of at least 6 months, when the client and Surrogate are not to be in contact, so that they can "go it on there own". Check out the website IPSA.us for more info.

 

Very interesting. Thank-you!

[MrMattBig]

When someone asks you over the phone are you more top or bottom how do you answer?

 

1. Have you had a chance to view my website?

It will describe more about me, and the type of experience we could have together.

2. If you are asking me to describe myself, I would consider myself equally versatile

3. I come prepared to every meeting ready to handle any situation.

 

To speak more broadly, if you speak in terms of describing yourself, there is no harm in that.

For example, you state as a client " I am a power bottom into fisting".

My reply would be " oh, sounds like we would get along great together".

The problem would be if we talk about actively doing that act together.

If you said " I am a bottom, are you able to fuck me and cum in my mouth?"

If I said yes, that is agreeing to a sex act, and when money is involved, that is prostitution.

Also, if my profile and website say I am vers and a switch, do I inherently have to be more top or bottom? If I am into both, but you are only looking to top or bottom, is that a turn off to some?

[Islesguy]

With Surrogate Partner Therapy there is both a therapist and a Surrogate that are working with the client. They work with the client separately but communicate with one another to evaluate progress. As a Surrogate I take them through exercises in touch, sensate focus, relaxation, body awareness, and slowly build on the emotional and physical intimacy. For some the intimacy has to build very slowly, for example, someone that has a history of abuse or molestation, it might take months of seeing them weekly, just for them to be comfortable undressing.

 

The ultimate goal is usually some type of sexual intercourse, after all the purpose of the therapy is for them to be able to take their knowledge and new found confidence out into the world and foster healthy relationships. The therapy ends either when the client decides, or when the goal has been reached and there is a period of at least 6 months, when the client and Surrogate are not to be in contact, so that they can "go it on there own". Check out the website IPSA.us for more info.

I remember this from watching Masters of Sex on Showtime. I didn't know if this was still a thing or not. Glad to see it is because it seemed like a worthwhile occupation.

[jawjateck]

If a provider lists the legal verbage as the very first thing in the text of his ad, I immediately hit the "x" because I know he is someone who doesn't have a clue about the biz or how to satisfy a client.

[Aaron_Bauder]

Are disclaimers a guarantee you're all clear? Obviously not. But giving your potential future defense attorney at least something to work with by refusing to directly promise sex acts in exchange for money is better than freely giving a prosectuor all he needs to convict.

 

Good defense attorneys have gotten guilty parties off on legalese, wording, and semantics. Words, letters, and the letter of the law actually do matter in court. A good defense attorney will not let insinsuation and suggestion alone be enough to convince 12 people beyond resonable doubt you broke laws. Disclaimer or no, if the prosecution has foolproof evidence you've engaged in illegal acts, you will likely be convicted. So why provide such evidence to them freely?

 

This risk comes with the territory, hence why clients should think twice balking what escorts charge. This is risky business, not a free for all. And all escorts should have a legal defense emergency fund, just in case.

Edited December 12, 2017 by Aaron_Bauder

[BlakeBenz]

But don't most high end escorts get paid at the end of the session? When the escort arrives the client already has the money placed out in plain view? Wouldn't sex first then compensation afterwards eliminate any fear of a charge of prostitution?

 

Do the police really care about high end escorts? Aren't they more concerned about street hustlers, boys standing on the corner? They are the ones who ask for the money upfront. They perform sex in the car or alley and are done in 10 minutes. Don't the police do stings on them?

 

Is there any jail time for prostitution? Just pay a fine? Anyone have first hand experience?

 

 

In what world does a "high end" escort not ask for the "money" up front? My gift is always received as soon as I arrive, otherwise I will leave. How do I know you even have what I asked for? There wasn't a misunderstanding? People want to make escorts out to be dishonest or scammy but it definitely goes both ways. An escort who does not require the donation upon arrival to me seems they don't know what they are doing... I wouldn't consider a provider like that to be high end at all.

 

Now to address the "street hustlers" topic.. so just because an escort is finding a client in the flesh automatically makes them not high end? I understand the boys you are referring to do exsist, however there's definitely a more upscale side to what you would refer to as a "street hustler" and I never see that being talked about on this forum.

 

You won't find me standing on a street corner, but you will find me at a steak house at happy hour or gay bars & cocktail lounges ALONE looking for clients. No I don't do car dates, but there's many hotels near by or if I'm in town visiting I always have a room to use. I don't think that makes me low end, I think that makes me about my business! An escort that just puts an ad up and just sits and waits for calls, to me that is not "high end" to me that is lazy.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

In what world does a "high end" escort not ask for the "money" up front? My gift is always received as soon as I arrive, otherwise I will leave. How do I know you even have what I asked for? There wasn't a misunderstanding? People want to make escorts out to be dishonest or scammy but it definitely goes both ways. An escort who does not require the donation upon arrival to me seems they don't know what they are doing... I wouldn't consider a provider like that to be high end at all.

 

Legally, it makes more sense for money exchange at the end of a session- AFTER anything consensual has happened between two adults. Asking to be paid up-front is classically bad form in this industry, always has been.

 

Truly high-end business neither focuses on this kind of money exchange nor worries it won't be paid.

 

With elite clientele, it's not the cash you're concerned with: It's making sure the experience is impeccable so they'll keep coming back.

Edited December 12, 2017 by Benjamin_Nicholas

[BlakeBenz]

Legally, it makes more sense for money exchange at the end of a session- AFTER anything consensual has happened between two adults. Asking to be paid up-front is classically bad form in this industry, always has been.

 

Truly high-end business neither focuses on this kind of money exchange nor worries it won't be paid.

 

With elite clientele, it's not the cash you're concerned with: It's making sure the experience is impeccable so they'll keep coming back.

 

 

Agree with the last part of your statement but in regards to the first part, that's why you engage lightly before asking for the gift. A kiss or a some type of physical contact. My regulars receive the luxury of paying after, but until trust is built the donation should already be laid out in view otherwise of course I am going to ask. I have a large circle of high end female escorts and they all do the same. Let's not forget these men are strangers to us... what would you do if you just completed the session and they didn't have what was negotiated? I have totally been robbed of my sexual energy back when I was new to this.

[Guy Fawkes]

It establishes expectations of what was expected to happen.

 

Lead's to interesting court room questioning if the detective tried to push beyond the expected boundary.

 

When pointed out before the case goes to trial to the prosecutor that a jury trial is about to be required they tend to defer while mumbling imperatives right up to when they drop the case just before the case is called.

 

Makes one wonder if a motion to squash any records of the arrest are possible.

 

Do you believe that most escorts believe that the often seen escort disclaimer (e.g. “I do not accept money for sexual acts. I am compensated via contributions for my time only. Anything that happens during that time is a decision made between two consenting adults”) really provides legal protection, or is it something included because they’re not sure or because so many other include it? I’ve practiced law for a long time (although not criminal law) and I’ve never felt that a prosecutor who’s intent on pursing male escorts would be dissuaded by such a disclaimer - and I wouldn’t bet on jurors buying it either. One escort I know insisted that it was effective. I thought it best not to ruin the evening with a negative debate and we moved on to more enjoyable pursuits.

[Guy Fawkes]

Disclaimer that I just came across and liked:

 

"Payment for legal adult services are for time and companionship only. Anything beyond that is left to both your discretion and mine as legal consenting adults. All content on these pages should not be considered an advertisement for anything other than time and companionship.":

[Guy Fawkes]

Calling our hairy friend in San Francisco with the sensitive nipples...

 

Nice try, but if you are talking about certified sex therapists, you are talking about licensed professionals in areas like psychology and medicine. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Certified_Sex_Therapist I am fairly certain that the applicable professional ethics rules would forbid them from personally participating in a sexual situation with one of their patients, at the risk of losing their license. If you are talking about someone who is more of an informal “coach,” if you will, who uses a “hands-on” approach to help clients deal with sexual hang-ups, I should think that person would still be at risk for being charged with the crime of prostitution if he accepts money in connection with any kind of sexual act. While I personally think this kind of service could be totally legitimate and genuinely therapeutic for some people, the “powers that be” would probably argue that it is still a crime. Having said that, it would be interesting to see someone use this as a defense, especially if they could put forward a particularly believable and sympathetic case.

[Guy Fawkes]

Because it violates the KISS principle? Juries need plain talk that won't put them to sleep.

 

Hey Matt! Why do you think a jury or a judge would take that disclaimer more seriously than the standard one?