Rentboy.com - Stat Card - "Prefer not to say"

[Guest Mikel]

Enlighten me, please. When an escort responds, "Prefer not to say" for one of the items on the stat card what, if anything, is implied? Particulary if they bothered to answer all items with an appropriate response and then, for some reason, one single item states, "Prefer not to say" I'm puzzled.

 

For example, an escort might answer all the information on the stat card. Then, for the question "Smoker"...the response might be "Prefer not to say". Does this, in your opinion, imply the escort is a smoker or at least a sometimes smoker? Wouldn't a non-smoker simply say, "No"?

 

Another example. All items are answered on the stat card. But then for "Safe Sex", the response might be, "Prefer not to say". Could not one reasonably conclude that someone who always practices safe sex would respond "Always"??

 

Some escorts obviously just don't want to be bothered with the stat card and simply state "Prefer not to say". It's obvious that they just wantto skip the whole stat card thing. But for those who answer all areas with accurate information, and then respond to smoking and/or safe sex with "prefer not to say" is something implied?

 

Maybe escorts and clients have differing opinions on this...but, I would appreciate hearing yours. I'm always open to acquiring a new perspective.

[JamesK840]

Way too much thought into the default answer. It's what's chosen when they don't answer the question...

[Guest ncm2169]

Yeah, but when they make some selections and ignore others, it does make one wonder ... particularly about the "safe sex" issue. .x(

[Guest Mikel]

Exactly.

I mean, why default on just one, or just two...why avoid answering those one or two questions but take the time to answer more trivial questions????

[Guest ncm2169]

And, before someone jumps in here and reminds all of us (presumed) dullards that we should always take adequate precautions (condoms) "just in case", it's obviously a fact that some of us clients like to note those little "decline to say" choices before we hire. Nothing wrong with proper due diligence, eh? }(

[Juan Vancouver]

Hey Mikel,

 

I fully understand your concern about those "prefered not to say" areas. However, I wanted to share my personal experience with Rentboy.

Most of the times it works very good, however, sometimes, even if I have made no change at all, one of the areas in my stat card will go to "prefer not to say".

In my case that happens often on the height field, but has hapenned with other fields too. Consistently I log in, fix the mistake to find that few days after that it will go to not specified again.

 

I agree that those are two different things altogether; and escort being non-commital about his practices, versus a mistake in advertising. But my point is that before jumping to conclusions, it would be clever to ask your escort.

 

Some people think that as long as you wear a condom at all times is enough, and it really doesnt matter whether your escort always does or not. I personally disagree. If a person has unprotected sex often, it is more likely that he or she will be carrier of a sexually transmited disease that we can get with low-risk practices. We are used to think so much about HIV that we sometimes forget that there is a huge spectrum of other things that we can get.

 

So, I fully understand your concern. But in the end, the only thing that there is to do is -as always- ask.

 

The more you know, the healthier you will be.

 

(It is funny how I keep recommending the same thing: Ask, ask, ask... and if you are not sure... ask again until you have no doubt.)

 

Happy... err... asking. :o

[Guest Mikel]

Juan:

 

Thanks for your insight. Maybe Rentboy.com should work on perfecting their software so that error doesn't occur. But so far, your insight is the only one to suggest something other than a deliberately implied message to the consumer.

 

You advice about asking is, of course, appropriate.

 

Have a happy new year!

 

Mikel

[Guest Tristan]

For what it's worth, I encounterd the "Prefer not to say" response for a few escorts who are known to do barebacking. All of the other questions were answered for each of these escorts. That was no coincidence or software problem.

[ny2222]

>For what it's worth, I encounterd the "Prefer not to say"

>response for a few escorts who are known to do barebacking.

>All of the other questions were answered for each of these

>escorts. That was no coincidence or software problem.

 

AND!!! The reverse is also true. I picked an escort that had an ALWAYS on the safe sex answer and when we started to get hot and heavy found he was rapidly trying to head into the UNSAFE sex territory...which we stopped...

So I tend not to put any real faith in an answer either way to that question.

[Juan Vancouver]

Happy new year to you too, stud!

[Juan Vancouver]

In the other hand...

 

If you are thinking about an escort whose first language is not english, you might consider that too.

On my gaydar profile, one year ago, I wrote:

 

"I enjoy hot, passionate sex, with a free, uninhibited imagination..." (Or something as ESL as that).

 

It was until a guy told me that he was not into barebacking, that I discovered that among gay people the word "uninhibited" has aquired a second meaning: unsafe sex. Horrified, I changed uninhibited, for something as lame as wholehearted...

 

I find very amusing to see what people choose to tell (or hide)about themselves. But what is important in the end, is what you do with that information.

 

Happy thinking, Sherlock!

[BobbyThompson]

RE: Rentboy.com - Stat Card - "Prefer not to say"

 

You should ask the escort on those "prefer not to says" before making the assumption. Rentboy's lovely but it makes SO many errors in my ads. For example, no matter how many times I update it, my height keeps appearing as 5'4. Now, I am not a munchkin, nor am I an extra in the new Willie Wonka flick, but that is what rentboy would have you think. It also makes similar errors in weight and other categories.

 

If you're interested in one of the boys don't let a prefer not to say disuade you. It might just be a mistake.