Any suggestions for a first timer/virgin

[Despardo]

@latbear4blk Its my first time with a man.

Oh. Good luck to you. You need to find someone gentle, friendly, considerate and fun. Perhaps you should make that point clear to the escort. I know some really sweet guys, just not in LA.

[Ord733]

Do you know any sweet guys in Chicago?

[LivingnLA]

@latbear4blk Its my first time with a man.

 

You'll definitely want to be upfront about it being your first time ever. You need someone patient. Someone considerate, and someone wiling to take time. Expect to need probably a 2 hour session because you'll want enough time to relax, become comfortable with whoever you decide to meet, and take your time.

 

Also, learn how to clean and prepare yourself if you're serious about bottoming for anal activity. It'll help you relax and make it more enjoyable for both of you.

 

Again, make it very clear to whoever you work with that you haven't done anything with a man before and be open to any feedback your escort provides. There's no such thing as a natural born cocksucker or bottom. You need to think about these activities and learn how to do them well.

 

I hope you enjoy your explorations and have fun! I love orally servicing a man or woman. There's something kinky and very enjoyable for me making a guy feel good. It's different compared to when I'm with a woman.

[+ dutchmuch]

EOY or runners up (previous ones at least.....) are usually a safe bet.

 

Previous is the key word here.

[coriolis888]

@Greentea845

 

1. Figure out what you want and how far you're comfortable going.

 

4. Given my personal experiences, I would strongly urge you to meet at a hotel and make the initial meeting with an escort in the lobby, bar, or restaurant so you can make sure they're not crazy, they can make sure you're not crazy, etc.

 

 

I wish I had followed this advice about initially meeting the escort in public.

 

I had a few bad experiences for being too trusting of some bogus escort ads.

 

It took a while for me to learn how to weed out the fakes and bad guys. Now things are okay. It just takes experience.

 

Good luck.

[+ dutchmuch]

Again, do a Pete's and Greet!

[Becket]

If this is in fact your first time with a man I strongly suggest you do NOT hire. And you're relatively young? Go to a club. Play with Grindr. The damage you could do with your psyche is real. The experience may influence future relationships. Get out and date. Get your heart broken. Fall in love again. People often fall for the first guy they have sex with. If that person is an escort it's gonna be a disaster for all concern.

[TruHart1]

Do you know any sweet guys in Chicago?

In Chicago you might enjoy Raul G. Manzo: https://rentmen.com/raulgmanzo

Here are his reviews on Daddy's reviews: http://daddysreviews.com/review/raul_g_Chicago

He's a mature escort (in his 40's) who not only is a wonderful escort but someone who will put you at ease right away. I speak from personal experience myself, though he was not my first hire. A number of members here have hired him for their first escort experience, though, and his many reviews are very accurate!

 

TruHart1

[Juan Vancouver]

If this is in fact your first time with a man I strongly suggest you do NOT hire. And you're relatively young? Go to a club. Play with Grindr. The damage you could do with your psyche is real. The experience may influence future relationships. Get out and date. Get your heart broken. Fall in love again. People often fall for the first guy they have sex with. If that person is an escort it's gonna be a disaster for all concern.

 

I agree.

 

An escort, regardless how good he may be, might not be the best choice for your first time. Don't rob yourself the memory of the excitement of little by little managing to have your first experience. It might not be with a porn star, it might be clumsy and awkward, it might not be porn quality, but it will be your first experience.

 

While I am comfortable with the idea of people hiring for many different reasons, I personally believe it is not healthy to hire to substitute a real partner. Sadly, in my experience, young men who start hiring will have a lot of trouble developing real relationships with real people.

 

Find men you are attracted to, meet people, open up, take risks, be daring. Get a few experiences under your belt, and then after a couple of years of being active, if you are still curious, give yourself the luxurious experience of a great escort.

 

If you start the other way, you will forever fuck up with your expectations; you will expect all your lovers to have a great body, a big cock, a handsome face, be incredibly skilled, be entirely focused on you, have absolutely no needs of their own, be ready whenever you are, you will expect every single lover to make make it easy for you, simple and incredibly fulfilling.

 

Believe me, real lovers in real life are absolutely nothing like that. You have to give, you have to negotiate, you have to listen, you have to focus on their needs as well. If you don't train yourself to navigate the back and forth that a real relationship with a real lover needs, you will be consistently disappointed by everyone who is not an escort.

 

This is my job and I love it. Trust me; I have a lot of experience and I have seen many men in your situation.

 

Don't hire. At least not for the next couple years.

[LADoug1]

DANE SCOTT hands down and without reservations. He is an outstanding escort and a sweetheart of a guy. He lives in Palm Springs but travels to Los Angeles frequently. I can guarantee you that you will have a great time with him . No I'm not his agent but I have known him for several years as both an friend and an escort. He is a very, Very, VERY special guy and I'm sure a number of other guys on this site will back me up

Dane will be in LA in early August. But he's so special and sweet that I've driven to PS to see him many times.

[+ José Soplanucas]

I agree.

 

An escort, regardless how good he may be, might not be the best choice for your first time. Don't rob yourself the memory of the excitement of little by little managing to have your first experience. It might not be with a porn star, it might be clumsy and awkward, it might not be porn quality, but it will be your first experience.

 

While I am comfortable with the idea of people hiring for many different reasons, I personally believe it is not healthy to hire to substitute a real partner. Sadly, in my experience, young men who start hiring will have a lot of trouble developing real relationships with real people.

 

Find men you are attracted to, meet people, open up, take risks, be daring. Get a few experiences under your belt, and then after a couple of years of being active, if you are still curious, give yourself the luxurious experience of a great escort.

 

If you start the other way, you will forever fuck up with your expectations; you will expect all your lovers to have a great body, a big cock, a handsome face, be incredibly skilled, be entirely focused on you, have absolutely no needs of their own, be ready whenever you are, you will expect every single lover to make make it easy for you, simple and incredibly fulfilling.

 

Believe me, real lovers in real life are absolutely nothing like that. You have to give, you have to negotiate, you have to listen, you have to focus on their needs as well. If you don't train yourself to navigate the back and forth that a real relationship with a real lover needs, you will be consistently disappointed by everyone who is not an escort.

 

This is my job and I love it. Trust me; I have a lot of experience and I have seen many men in your situation.

 

Don't hire. At least not for the next couple years.

 

@Greentea845 , I do tend to agree with Juan's advice. However, I do not want to rush to give advice without having more information. May I ask why you want to hire a professional to have your first experience with a man? If you do not feel comfortable sharing such intimate details in this public thread, please feel free to PM me or any of the other friends here who have shown the will to support you.

[oscarkin]

I'm still fairly new to this site but it seems to me that this entire thread is an excellent example of the forum at its best. The responses are kind, respectful, informative and helpful. I'm also thinking about LivingnLA's post from yesterday: http://www.companyofmen.org/threads/is-there-some-cultural-norm-im-missing-zips-up-flameproof-jumpsuit.115933/

[Epigonos]

Frankly I think hiring an outstanding escort for a first time male to male sexual experience is an EXCELLENT IDEA. Start with a pro who knows what he is doing, is gentle, thoughtful, considerate and a knowledgeable teacher. If the escort is good there should be no fumbling around trying to figure what should be happening.

[+ Trebor]

Frankly I think hiring an outstanding escort for a first time male to male sexual experience is an EXCELLENT IDEA. Start with a pro who knows what he is doing, is gentle, thoughtful, considerate and a knowledgeable teacher. If the escort is good there should be no fumbling around trying to figure what should be happening.

 

I agree wholeheartedly with Epigonos, and again, I would recommend Dane Scott for your first time experience...and every OTHER time you have the opportunity to see this WONDERFUL, SEXY, KIND AND CONSIDERATE man! He is a gem of rare quality! You can't go wrong with Dane:D

[+ José Soplanucas]

I'm afraid we all are jumping, out of our best intentions, to give advice to @Greentea845 , when we know pretty much nothing about him. Maybe an escort is good, maybe not. We are just projecting our own preferences, we should wait and learn more about him.

[Greentea845]

Thank you all for your kind consideration and suggestions.

 

As for getting to know me what would you like to know?

[Becket]

A great escort probably will be a great experience. Then what? If you're first car is a Mercedes, your first steak a kobe filet, your first airplane ride in the first class cabin........That's my only thought. Otherwise, go get 'em buddy.

[liubit]

As for getting to know me what would you like to know?

Basically everything. o_Oo_O

[whipped guy]

Thank you all for your kind consideration and suggestions.

 

As for getting to know me what would you like to know?

 

Well you need to know yourself first, know what you want, and communicate that to the escort as best that you can. That's the key. Communicate and then communicate! Then communicate more when you first meet so the guy can get into your headspace. Is might seems strange but the best escorts... the top tier guys... will really know what you need, know how far to safely take you, and in many cases know what you need before you even totally have it figured out yourself!!! You need to be the compass needle to help point the escort in the right direction and then he will take you on the ride of your life!! However, you need to get the ball rolling yourself and most importantly rolling in the right direction.

 

In my case it took several months of research to select my first guy. Unfortunately I did not know about the forum back then and only joined several years later. Still. I read the reviews in great detail on what was this site way back then! My diligence and hard work paid off. It was a well reviewed guy who had won an honorable mention on the review site in the days before Escort of the Year voting. So you are at an advantage with the info that guys who post here on the forum can supply! Still, don't rush into anything and go with what feels comfortable in your gut. If you know yourself as much as possible (and that's a tough thing to know if you it is something that you have never previously done!) what's better than that!!

 

Here's wishing you the best of luck!

[+ José Soplanucas]

Thank you all for your kind consideration and suggestions.

 

As for getting to know me what would you like to know?

 

Why do you choose an escort for your first time instead of a connection based only in mutual attraction?

[Greentea845]

Well for me I am still curious about my sexuality if I actually have chemistry with a guy. I mean I get aroused watching guys in porn so I wanted to see if it would be the same if I met with someone who is experienced. It is also the most convenient for me personally since I'm always busy with work and have little time to go find someone and have a connection that will end up in the bedroom.

 

For my possible type/interest it would be muscular daddy/big brother type like being taught about how to be with a man. Anything other info I should share?

[+ Trebor]

Greentea, check your private message box!

[Juan Vancouver]

A great escort probably will be a great experience. Then what? If you're first car is a Mercedes, your first steak a kobe filet, your first airplane ride in the first class cabin........That's my only thought. Otherwise, go get 'em buddy.

 

Exactly my thoughts.

 

Grown men who had their first experience with us have often have told Thor and I that we have ruined them for real life. We created an understandable expectation that every partner should be fit, handsome, hung as a horse, have porn like stamina, be totally focused, eager, absolutely have no demands of his own, be technically skilled and passionate about his delivery, be available whenever he is needed, be easy, fun, friendly and always make him feel wanted, hot and able.

 

This expectation has ruined every single other encounter with non working men. There is absolutely no way a regular partner would exhibit all these traits at the same time... because he is not giving a service, but enjoying his own life.

 

Closeted, married men of a certain age are wise to stick to the safety of exploring (at least at first) with professionals.

 

It is my absolute belief that a young man who starts driving a Porsche will continue hiring Porsches every time he needs a car because no other car will be satisfying. Even his romantic expectations will be of having a man entirely devoted to him asking nothing in return.

 

I have seen this happening many times and it's not pretty.

 

This is absolutely not a healthy way to learn about intimacy and sexuality.

[Despardo]

I agree that it is dicey to give advice on such a personal matter to someone I don't know. In some respects, hiring a sympathetic escort might be the least complicated way to experience sex with a man for the first time. You don't have those potentially awkward issues like when is it time for him to leave?, do I have to make him breakfast?, should I call him the next day or wait until he calls me?, etc. There is that whole social/emotional thing in a "real life" encounter that can be great, but very often is embarrassing or confusing. With an escort, mutual expectations are clear. Chances that you would fall in love with the first man you slept with are extremely low. If things don't go as well as you might have wished, with an escort, you can simply walk away. I think I have had over the years more disappointing (or downright horrible) sexual experiences with guys I picked up at a bar or club than with escorts in general--there are way more variables at play. For some people, trying to attract a guy at a gay bar can be an awkward, frustrating, intimidating, embarrassing, disappointing, or downright frightening (not to mention time consuming) experience. If all you want to do is finally to have a physical experience with a man (get it out of the way, as it were,) a sympathetic escort may be an intelligent choice. I have no experience with Dane Scott, but assuming he is your type, the comments on this thread amount to a thunderous endorsement (information I have shelved for future reference.) From my SoCal days, I seem to remember that the drive from LA to Palm Springs is about 2.5 hours and therefore a day trip. If your car AC is working well, you might consider heading there for a day or book a room for one night (off season rates will apply.) As I said, I don't know Dane, but I can see that maybe lunch or dinner plus 2 hours alone with this man would constitute an exciting adventure for you. If the experience is a bust, I recommend the fabulous Palm Springs Art Museum which is in itself worth the drive.

[+ José Soplanucas]

Well for me I am still curious about my sexuality if I actually have chemistry with a guy. I mean I get aroused watching guys in porn so I wanted to see if it would be the same if I met with someone who is experienced. It is also the most convenient for me personally since I'm always busy with work and have little time to go find someone and have a connection that will end up in the bedroom.

 

For my possible type/interest it would be muscular daddy/big brother type like being taught about how to be with a man. Anything other info I should share?

 

I think that info is enough right now for me, let me fill the gaps with a conditional sentence.

 

If you have no self esteem issues, if you are confident, if you feel attractive, if you feel a healthy curiosity, hiring an escort would be the easy way but not the best way.

 

I would go with Juan's advice. This is important, find the time to go to a bar, flirt, develop rapport with somebody, take your time. If you can't do bars for any reason, explore social media, but do not rush to feed your curiosity the easy way.