When a client's sex drive supercedes the escort

[instudiocity]

Yes, I am aware of that...but once you make a topic you can't change the headline. Sometimes words pop up in my mind that I want to use, but the definition doesn't quite match up to the context I'm using it in. I think the word I meant to use was: "surpasses".

 

And yes, I looked the definition up...but the word sounded good. Thanks for pointing that out.

Congratulations, Joey, you, yourself have now defined your inability to stop your typing until you're thoughts have solidified and you have a clear comment, times 100.

[Mocha]

Congratulations, Joey, you, yourself have now defined your inability to stop your typing until you're thoughts have solidified and you have a clear comment, times 100.

 

You have nothing useful to contribute to this discussion except for some jive time grammatical policing. It's a thread, not a goddamn doctoral thesis. You can exit stage left...

 

[RussJohnson]

Excellent assessment there. It's crazy how many guys out there these days are sex addicts. Mainly I find the 20s guys are, but it seems to reappear in the 40s. Ho would be an understatement. Hoes can control themselves, sex addicts can't. Get them on that 'Tina" stuff, they become some sort of hypersexual super freak.

 

However, since our marathon, the messages have stopped. But I will say, when he was sending me the messages, I didn't tell him to "stop" but there were times I would not respond for a day, and mentioned that I had several hours of travel for the week prior to our meeting. I just wanted to remain non adversarial because I really wanted this exotic getaway.

 

Of course guys in their 20s are going to be sex addicts if your lens for judging them is extremely limited! Heaven forbid anyone have sex and enjoy it with multiple people while they are young cause they will be called a sex addict or ho! Even if they are super nice, volunteer their time, contribute to charity, foster children, and go to church every Sunday. There are bad and good people in every category, plain and simple, and it is outrageous that you can't at least consider that.

 

No, that's the textbook definition of DeJa Vu. Been there, done that. I don't have to know or experience the escort who was mentioned, because I already know where that road leads. How many times do I have to be played, to realize certain guys are hoes?

 

You just said it yourself: you are promiscuous because it feels damn good. For you. The purpose is carnal and self serving in nature.

 

But you know what, I'm just gonna leave it at that. Whoever is dumb enough to sleep around with married or partnered men (like you) and don't get paid for it...is their perogative. You just won't catch me doing that. However, as an aside...I do find many of the longest gay relationships are open relationships...so maybe I haven't experienced a long enough monogamous relationship to understand why open relationships are so highly desired, or why most guys end of finding themselves on one.

 

But hey, as long as the partnered guys continue giving me their business...I am open relationship friendly 100%. But you won't catch me doing that in ANY other situation.

 

Yes CERTAIN guys are hoes, and maybe you found the worst of the bunch., but the idea that you cant do something because it feels good, because it is "self-serving" is sooo religious it's crazy. All this self suffering is exhausting. If you communicate and practice honesty, no one gets hurt by having an open relationship.

 

We get it you don't want to do something, and you are entitled to that. We get it you've had a bad experience, and that has created your view. But can you stop criticizing and insulting people who lead a different life than you for someone in your position you think that would be the last thing you want to do...

[Mocha]

Of course guys in their 20s are going to be sex addicts if your lens for judging them is extremely limited! Heaven forbid anyone have sex and enjoy it with multiple people while they are young cause they will be called a sex addict or ho!

 

We get it you've had a bad experience, and that has created your view. But can you stop criticizing and insulting people who lead a different life than you for someone in your position you think that would be the last thing you want to do...

 

Experience(sssssssssss). Not 1 experience.

 

I think when I said ho, it was taken as if I was putting someone down. That's not a put down. That's how some of us relate in the community. Someone who is known to sleep around, be cruisy, is very sexual/promiscuous, etc....is called.

 

My lens for judging is not limited. I can tell you many stories. I let a guy roommate with me last year, he was addicted to porn and hookups. Still is addicted to porn and hookups. Everytike I came home, his hands was in his pants. He's always hooking up, cruising the CL, cruising the blvd, absolutely no discernment for his health. I have to counsel him on STDs, and the symptoms and realities. Me, the escort.

 

I knew of another friend who was also a porn/sex addict. He was always on the hunt, sleeping with guys in relationships, etc. He would ditch me for a dick. Even a dick that was in the asses of every Black bottom in Town. Now that's a ho.

 

The guy I was seeing for a month whom I mention, he was a sex addict.

 

I'm not criticizing and insulting anyone. I can't make this any clearer. I don't know why you're allowing yourself to feel that way. Is sex enjoyable? Yes. Do I do it because it feels good? Yes. But, I'm not in a relationship and still cruising on the side, indiscriminately, just because it feels good. I'm a single man. If I was in a relationship with another sexually active man and still had to go get sex in a sleazy, cruisy way...I wouldn't be happy. And damn sure wouldn't be happy of my man was doing the same thing. I've recently even decided I won't go for anymore escorts/erotic therapists myself because the last one just lied. One minute he was telling me I was the only person he slept with, next minute he's hitting me up saying his ass is ready to be fucked. How can your ass be ready to fuck? He told me he was just a massage therapist.

 

I don't care how you try to defend those who live a different life. I'm just saying FOR ME, I have been approached many times by men who are in relationships, expecting me to be the sideline ho...or just the fuck buddy, while they live a coupled lifestyle. If that's what they want to do, fine. Im not saying don't do it. But, if Juan ever approached me and asked me to fuck him, knowing he's involved....I'd tell him to get at me when he's single.

 

I live a different lifestyle too: I'm single and free to play with other single guys. I also have self control and self respect to not sleep with a partnered guy I just met in the gym 30 seconds ago. I am promiscuous only to a degree that enables me to live the lifestyle I want to, without having to beg and plead for a relationship from someone who is partnered or unavailable. So by charging for my time, I benefit and they benefit. Money talks, bullshit walks.

[Mocha]

And I'll add, I may have taken this out earlier but I suppose maybe my personal experiences may be different because of who I am. I tend to date inter racially, but one of the challenges with that in the gay scene is many (not all) guys who sleep interracially usually (not always) tend to put fantasy and fetish over reality. And it's not simply a black/white thing.

 

One of my friends mentioned above is Pakistanian. His "preference" for white guys is more of an obsession. Every interactions he ever has with a white man is simply a ploy to reach the end result of giving them a blow job.

 

Sometimes you have to see things from a ndifferent persons perspective. It's no secret the gay majority gets to enjoy a life of partnership and being able to sleep around on the site. BUT, that person you're sleeping round with on the side may be dealing with being fetishized and exploited by the "gay majority"