Martha Stewart will now make grilled cheese for her prison bitch!

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

Now that Martha Stewart will be making grilled cheese, with a dash of dill, for her prison bitch Lucinda, let us have a time of sharing on what the domestic diva has done for all of us.

 

Top 10 Signs You're Being Stalked by Martha Stewart:

 

10. You get a threatening note made up of letters cut out of a

magazine with pinking shears, and they're all the same size,

the same font, and precisely lined up in razor-sharp rows.

 

9. You find a lemon slice in the dog's water bowl.

 

8. On her TV show she makes a gingerbread house that looks

exactly like your split-level, right down to the fallen

licorice downspout and the half-open graham cracker

garage door.

 

7. You find your pet bunny on the stove in an exquisite tarragon,

rose petal & saffron demi-glace, with pecan-crusted

hearts of palm and a delicate mint-fennel sauce.

 

6. The unmistakable aroma of potpourri follows you even after

you leave the bathroom.

 

5. You discover that every napkin in the entire house has been

folded into a swan.

 

4. No matter "where" you eat, your place setting always includes

an oyster fork.

 

3. Twice this week you've been the victim of a drive-by doilying.

 

2. You wake up in the hospital with a concussion and endive

stuffing in every orifice.

 

 

AND THE NUMBER 1 Sign You're Being Stalked by Martha Stewart...

 

1. You awaken one morning with a glue gun pointed squarely at your

temple.

[imrthr]

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I can't make any sense out of your posting! Is part of it missing?

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

yeah, I guess the humor part

 

it is a JOKE post - I wasn't getting serious about Ms. Stewart and her felon ways

 

http://rds.yahoo.com/S=96062883/K=martha+stewart+humor/v=2/TID=I001_0/l=IVS/*-http://www.pdmmfamily.com/images%20pdmm/humor/martha_stewart08-02.jpg

 

>???????????? ????????????? ???????????????

>

>I can't make any sense out of your posting! Is part of it

>missing?

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

oh wait - there is more

 

http://rds.yahoo.com/S=96062883/K=martha+stewart+humor/v=2/TID=I001_0/l=IVS/*-http://www.pwasoh.com/media/martha_captivity/marthacover_002.jpg

[+ Hoover42]

Don't worry, VDN, I thought it was funny.

 

...Hoover

 

p.s. I do feel sorry for Martha, despite her reputation for being an enormous bitch. It seems unfair that she would have to go to jail for her crime when Kenneth Lay still remains free after destroying the retirement of hundreds, if not thousands, of people.

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

HOOVER!

 

>Don't worry, VDN, I thought it was funny.

 

Thank you.

 

>p.s. I do feel sorry for Martha, despite her reputation for

>being an enormous bitch. It seems unfair that she would have

>to go to jail for her crime when Kenneth Lay still remains

>free after destroying the retirement of hundreds, if not

>thousands, of people.

 

I agree. Martha is getting a raw deal because she has a vagina. The dudes who do this EVERY DAY need to do time and experience love through the back door as well.

 

VDN

 

}(

[Chuck50]

NEED I SAY!!!!!

 

Its the "Good Old Boy Club" Hugs Chuck... Not thats what i am condoeing but its fact HUGS Chuck :P :P

[Guest Jordan21]

RE: NEED I SAY!!!!!

 

I'm thrilled she's going to the slammer. I know her, and I know people who've worked for her. She's horrible. Her arrogance was her downfall. And while one may argue that others have gotten off with less, I'm pissed off at those who then argue that it's a "travesty" she should have to pay. They should be angry about those who have gotten off with less. Martha got exactly what she deserved - and to all the Bill Cosby's and Rosie O'Donnell's who are publicly saying this is wrong, shame on them. It's one thing to stand by her as a friend, it's another to go public and condemn the jurors and the judge and say she should have gotten off.

[Guest alanm]

My first reaction was to compare Martha Stewart to Ken Lay and believe the virdict was unfair. But, I heard virtually all legal experts on TV (mostly on Friday night) disagree, i.e. as with Nixon the coverup was worse than the crime, to change my mind. In the world Martha travels in, she just assumed they would not call her on the lies.

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

RE: NEED I SAY!!!!!

 

Hello Jordon,

 

>less. Martha got exactly what she deserved - and to all the

>Bill Cosby's and Rosie O'Donnell's who are publicly saying

>this is wrong, shame on them. It's one thing to stand by her

>as a friend, it's another to go public and condemn the jurors

>and the judge and say she should have gotten off.

 

What did I miss? I know Rosie, between planning her wedding and getting all the Twinkies ready, was in the court a few days. However, I had NO IDEA Bill Cosby was behind Martha as well? Did he go to court? Was he on TV saying she is all that and a bag of ginger?

 

It should be interesting to see if they give her any time, especially since the fines she will have to pay is chump change for her.

 

VDN

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

RE: NEED I SAY!!!!!

 

>Its the "Good Old Boy Club" Hugs Chuck... Not thats what

>i am condoeing but its fact HUGS Chuck :P :P

 

That is the truth for sure. Though she does have a set of balls it doesn't count if they have been decoupaged.

[Rick Munroe]

>In the world Martha travels in, she just assumed they

>would not call her on the lies.

 

Martha hangs out with Bush and Cheney? :+

[Guest showme43]

Life isn't like a box of chocolates....it's more like a jar of jalapenos.

 

What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

 

....apologies to Forrest Gump

 

[ValleyDwellerNorth]

>mind. In the world Martha travels in, she just assumed they

>would not call her on the lies.

 

I think if Martha wasn't so consumed with trying to beat men and participate in the business world like the men she has observed then she wouldn't be worrying if the bars she is about to see would clash with her prison jumper. The world she started to travel in was one of starched-delusion and raspberry fantasies.

 

I mean, geez, all she did was teach straight women how to coordinate sheets and make wreaths out of dried fruit. Christopher Lowell was doing this shit for years.

 

http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2000/09/23/lowell150x194.jpg