Solving a tricky dilemma re: incalls at hotels when not required

[Mocha]

I recently had a client cancel citing: "there's no need to get a hotel room just for me, I'll just cancel".

 

I found it rather annoying because I had informed him 24 hours in advance, that I couldn't honor a noon appointment because it would be too early to check in. I asked if he could meet at 2 instead. It would also have required 2 days of hotel stay if I did noon. However, I was Visiting the area and had already made accommodations for free with relatives. If and when I received an incall request, I would set up a hotel. In this case, he explained that he thought I would be seeing other clients, but just for him wasn't necessary. I told hm I'd be getting the room regardless, because I set it aside as my incall day. But he still cancelled.

 

To me this was quite a double standard. On the one hand clients will say it's uneccesary to get a room just for them, but on the other say how traveling escorts tend to be worn out from seeing too many. It's just confusing to me. If I can stay with friends for free (the trip was a mix of escort and personal) why would I get a hotel when I don't have anyone booked? I need atleast 1 client before I go booking a hotel. Otherwise I'm just winging it.

 

Well the day of our purported appointment, another client wanted an incall. But turns out, due to being cancelled on, I

decided not to book the room and since it was a Saturday, my planned hotel sold out. Many other hotels were booked also. So I couldn't take the 2nd client. I ended up losing atleast $400 that day, but the second appointment has rebooked.

 

So the question is: if you're visiting your friends in another city, and staying in a hotel is not necessary except for appointments, what's the best way to convey this to a client? I find most times, they end up saying something like I wrote in this first paragraph. But I don't get what the issue is. If I'm paying for the hotel myself in advance, why should it matter if someone is the only client booked? And that's not to rule out Having another client who ends up booking.

[Kevin Slater]

Why are you telling the client the minutia of your logistics? Why not just say "I look forward to meeting you at 2:00 in room 417 of Big Dick's Halfway Inn"?

 

Kevin Slater

[Mocha]

Why are you telling the client the minutia of your logistics? Why not just say "I look forward to meeting you at 2:00 in room 417 of Big Dick's Halfway Inn"?

 

Kevin Slater

 

The client booked the appointment at noon. The next day is when I mentioned I'd have to move tomorrow's appointment to 2. I suppose I could have omitted any reasoning for it, but felt more genuine to mention it. But somehow thru text it was interpreted that I was getting the hotel specifically for our visit.

 

I mentioned prior to our initial planning that I'd have to work around hotel checkin/checkout times. Noon happens to be an almost universal checkout time.

 

Based on stories another client gave me regarding the area's local escorts, it seems the client may have felt he was getting the runaround. But I was pretty clear why I needed to change times.

[SteveEscort]

I've a feeling he may have thought you were "slotting" someone else in. A few months ago my sister popped in just a few minutes before 11am. She lives 45 miles from me so this isn't a regular thing. I sent a text to my 11am client saying my sister arrived and could he do 11.15/11.30 he cancelled because of the 15 minute change. The next time I seen him (a week or so later) he said "I thought maybe i'd end up seeing a client leave as I was already parked up across the road waiting and that didn't appeal". I was quite genuine with my texts and she was gone by 11.10am, she only dropped something in, as she was passing.

 

Clients arn't stupid and I am sure he's booked into hundreds of hotels and will know the drill. He knows it's a 2pm/3pm check in. In future though, enquire whether they have an early check in policy. Many hotels in England do allow early check in from 12noon for an extra £10.

[desertguy1954]

I agree with Kevin. When I book it is with the escort providing the place we will meet. That is all that I need to know. Any other information is not needed.

[wklucas]

"""Start collecting deposits. This is the only way to have a security blanket for these types of things."""

 

 

 

Two-way street.....not the same situation as being discussed in this thread but......I was in Palm Springs......contacted & hired a well-known / well-reviewed guy to drive up/over from San Diego for a 2 hour date.....he said OK but since he was driving in just to see me, the rate would be higher....I agreed.....after he arrived at my hotel & some initial chit chat, I learned that he had planned a 2 day visit for himself with a bunch of other appointments. I did not ask / he did not offer to knock his price down a bit.....afterward though, in reflection, I felt a bit angry & having been taken advantage of......nice enough guy during the "date", who I never contacted or hired again.

[SteveEscort]

"""Start collecting deposits. This is the only way to have a security blanket for these types of things."""

 

 

 

Two-way street.....not the same situation as being discussed in this thread but......I was in Palm Springs......contacted & hired a well-known / well-reviewed guy to drive up/over from San Diego for a 2 hour date.....he said OK but since he was driving in just to see me, the rate would be higher....I agreed.....after he arrived at my hotel & some initial chit chat, I learned that he had planned a 2 day visit for himself with a bunch of other appointments. I did not ask / he did not offer to knock his price down a bit.....afterward though, in reflection, I felt a bit angry & having been taken advantage of......nice enough guy during the "date", who I never contacted or hired again.

 

Oops that's a bit naughty.

[wklucas]

"""Oops that's a bit naughty."""

 

 

Yes, that's the way I saw it too....after we had made our plans, the guy in San Diego made arrangements to stay overnight at a friend's house, had contacted 1 of his "regulars" in Palm Springs for a date as long as he was in town & had made at least 2 other dates for himself & had also made plans to attend a pool party at another friend's house as well.....he certainly did not end up coming to Palm Springs just for me......I was simply his first contact, which subsequently put all of his other plans into motion.....charging me extra for coming to Palm Springs was......outrageous

[Amoco]

The part that I'm still struggling with is why the client announced that he would "cancel anyway"? Was he planning on canceling or just cancellung because of the change in times?

 

I have a few responses:

 

I think Kevin is correct - clients don't want to know the issues. Instead, they want to be able to count on the discretion and organizational skills of the chosen escort. That said, it would be the escorts responsibility when traveling to see clients to do some homework and find out which places can be expected and counted on to allow early registration, or alternatively, decide to take a small risk and book the space with the expectation of getting business. All too often I read these comments and all I can think is that escorts are looking to be part of a high paying enterprise which affords extraordinary flexibility, but they want no costs associated with it. Every successful business has associated costs, and though I understand the desire to minimize the expense, I would hardly think it appropriate to hold clients responsible for reacting to changes, regardless of hw seemingly insignificant they might be. Though I confess that I don't understand what the issue was with the first client, I think that once you put the ad up that advertises incalls, a professional is obligated to have that opportunity available. If you told him upfront that this was an issue, then it sounds like he wasn't comfortable being the only one requiring the space - who knows? But as a businessman, it's important to understand what's important. And if guys their business like a business, they would accrue money monthly to finance the "good" trips where they can book good rooms at reasonable prices so that they're ready to go when people respond to advertising. If you keep cutting corners to save $100 on a $200-$300 an hour service that can easily generate $500-$1,000 a day, over time you will lose money. The smart guys understand that there is a delicate balance to this process, but understand clients want discreet efficiency.

 

Killian's suggestion will work for some guys, but not the unreviewed or relatively unknown guys - at least it wouldn't work for me. Don't forget that there must be 50 threads that tell clients not to pay anything before the service. I understand that a deposit is different in your minds, but again, it's providing money before knowing each other. I would do it with Killian or someone well known, but wouldn't do it with everyone.

 

My other reaction is a bit more direct and forgive me in advance for raising the professionalism question once again..given the dramatic recent increase in traveling escorts and the apparent need for them to travel to maximize their income, can one f the guys comment on why there is an absence of support among your colleagues to have some centralized list of appropriate hotels in different cities, best rates, ones that offer early registration and any other perks? I've been struck by the recent commentary by Devon and others that have said that they are constantly dealing with competitive escorts that not only don't provide support, but rather, attempt to sabotage the traveling guys. That would suggest some ongoing issues in your "professional" ranks. You ought to be able to count on each other for some basic guidelines when on the road.

 

So, in summary:

1. There are "costs of doing business" in every profession - including escorting.

2. Deposits have their own issues, especially for the less well reviewed guys.

3. An escort suppirt system with centralized lists of best places to use, is probably a good idea for working guys to put together.

[SteveEscort]

"""Oops that's a bit naughty."""

 

 

Yes, that's the way I saw it too....after we had made our plans, the guy in San Diego made arrangements to stay overnight at a friend's house, had contacted 1 of his "regulars" in Palm Springs for a date as long as he was in town & had made at least 2 other dates for himself & had also made plans to attend a pool party at another friend's house as well.....he certainly did not end up coming to Palm Springs just for me......I was simply his first contact, which subsequently put all of his other plans into motion.....charging me extra for coming to Palm Springs was......outrageous

 

I am away 2-3 times a month, usually just a few hundred miles but one trip every month is to Germany. I have never extended my trips with exception to one London overnight when I met a female friend for lunch and drinks the day after and didn't go home on the planned 11am train back from London and instead advanced booked myself on the 5pm train home. He wasn't told this but I wouldn't have thought it mattered anyway. I wouldn't have met up with her unless I was in London anyway and it was lunch and a couple of bottles of wine (hic hic) it wasn't as if I was seeing someone else at a normal rate whilst someone else paid my train fare. It was social I did however send him a text at 1.30pm saying I was home we were in fact in a swanky Chelsea wine bar opening another chardonnay. It didn't hurt him and I was completely and totally discreet about it. The reason I didn't mention it was because he paid my train fare and had sourced the best trains and my train was £20 more at 5pm than 11am and so just wanted to keep stuff simple.

[Mocha]

Amoco's and Steve thanks for response. And to Killian, yes I often will ask for deposits, but I've become too lenient. My PayPal is there for a reason. Amocos, I've checked in to millions of hotels. Early check in varies so much. But, it's universal that baymont inn and travel lodge tend to allow 7 am checkin times. However, when booking something like Hyatt, Marriott, etc, it's always going to be after noon. Once in awhile, a hotel like Hampton Inn or Wyndham Garden will allow an early morning check in, but it varies so much and usually involves some form of pleading. Unlike Europe, most hotels do not allow early or late check in for an extra $20. They want full price. I've sometimes arrived to hotels at 6 in the morning, and had to check out at 12 or 1 and still ended up paying full price. It's very hard to work around that, and it's much easier to just not book a noon appointment.

 

But right now, I'm considering removing Incalls from the equation all together. For the time being atleast. It's just becoming too frustrating and detracting from my vacation pretty quickly. I can't continue to play this cruel game of book the hotel, and then see who's going to cancel. I received an incall request today, Guy cancels proceeded by placating excuses regarding my rate (which is listed on ad). My rebooked appointment also cancelled. Currently trying to work with him on keeping the appointment. It's all laced with assuming I'm here working, sitting in a hotel with my legs open, and waiting for calls. That's the current school of thought. Unfortunently it's not that kind of trip. Yes I can host, but for prebooked, confirmed appointments...before I book a hotel. But even those aren't following through, so it's probably better to just not offer the service. Use it, or lose it. It's like learning a new language.

 

To be more blunt, I'd rather spend $10 or less driving someplace and be stood up, than to spend $100-150 at a hotel and be stood up. But guess which one is more likely to happen? 3 incall cancellations this past week. Last time I was stood up on an outcall was over a year ago.

[instudiocity]

"""Oops that's a bit naughty."""

 

 

Yes, that's the way I saw it too....after we had made our plans, the guy in San Diego made arrangements to stay overnight at a friend's house, had contacted 1 of his "regulars" in Palm Springs for a date as long as he was in town & had made at least 2 other dates for himself & had also made plans to attend a pool party at another friend's house as well.....he certainly did not end up coming to Palm Springs just for me......I was simply his first contact, which subsequently put all of his other plans into motion.....charging me extra for coming to Palm Springs was......outrageous

Charging you extra for coming to Palm Springs wasn't outrageous. You contacted a San Diego escort for a Palm Springs appointment and you agreed to the price he quoted.

 

The outrageous part was the dumbass didn't have enough sense to keep his mouth shut. If he had not told you that you'd been had, you might never have known. Even if you ran into him later that day, would you begrudge his having taken another appointment in Palm Springs AFTER your appointment?

 

He could have quite easily told you he was half way back to San Diego when he got the call to come back to Palm Springs. He could have told you he'd driven back to San Diego and gotten the same rate to come back again.

 

Nope, the only outrageous thing here was the dumbass didn't now when to keep his mouth shut.

[instudiocity]

... Amocos, I've checked in to millions of hotels. Early check in varies so much. But, it's universal that baymont inn and travel lodge tend to allow 7 am checkin times. However, when booking something like Hyatt, Marriott, etc, it's always going to be after noon.

Is that a subtle diss. I routinely stay in Marriotts and Hiltons. I frequently have early check-ins around Noon without being asked to pay additional. I cannot believe that a Noon check-in is that out of order for a hotel room. People travel, people need to be accommodated. This whole idea of early check-in's being impossible is weird.

 

But right now, I'm considering removing Incalls from the equation all together. For the time being atleast. It's just becoming too frustrating and detracting from my vacation pretty quickly. I can't continue to play this cruel game of book the hotel, and then see who's going to cancel. I received an incall request today, Guy cancels proceeded by placating excuses regarding my rate (which is listed on ad). My rebooked appointment also cancelled. Currently trying to work with him on keeping the appointment. It's all laced with assuming I'm here working, sitting in a hotel with my legs open, and waiting for calls. That's the current school of thought. Unfortunently it's not that kind of trip. Yes I can host, but for prebooked, confirmed appointments...before I book a hotel. But even those aren't following through, so it's probably better to just not offer the service. Use it, or lose it. It's like learning a new language.

Sounds like you need to decide if you are vacationing or visiting. If you're vacationing what are you doing advertising? If you're a visiting escort, why don't you have a hotel room? You really can't successfully play both roles simultaneously.

 

To be more blunt, I'd rather spend $10 or less driving someplace and be stood up, than to spend $100-150 at a hotel and be stood up. But guess which one is more likely to happen? 3 incall cancellations this past week. Last time I was stood up on an outcall was over a year ago.

This all comes down to you telling too much of your circumstances to the client which interrupts their reason for calling you. I'm a traveling sales person. My customers have no idea where I sleep when I'm traveling. My customers have no idea which car I'm driving unless I'm buying their lunch.

 

All you do to set yourself up as an escort should be surrounded by MYSTERY. That's what clients are buying anyway. We want to escape our everyday hassles, be guaranteed a good time with no drama from our hires. We want to have a time of rest and relaxation - not of scheduling difficulties because the escort they're trying to hire cannot check into his hotel room until after 2 PM.

 

Basically, you advertised an availability you didn't have then made it difficult for the client because you involved him in your drama. I suggest that should you have said to the Noon client, that you wouldn't be available until after 2 PM, he'd have rescheduled. But because you made him think about the hotel and your issues, he just bailed. There was no escape from reality with you. It was all REALITY.

 

Ever go to Disneyland/Disney World? Where are the delivery trucks and the garbage trucks, and the off-duty characters out of uniform? You never see them. Because Disney is all about Imagining being away from everyday cares. What happens with you needs to be behind the scenes, not put on display for the client.

[Kevin Slater]

Ever go to Disneyland/Disney World? Where are the delivery trucks and the garbage trucks, and the off-duty characters out of uniform? You never see them. Because Disney is all about Imagining being away from everyday cares. What happens with you needs to be behind the scenes, not put on display for the client.

 

Well put.

 

Kevin Slater

[SteveEscort]

This all comes down to you telling too much of your circumstances to the client which interrupts their reason for calling you. I'm a traveling sales person. My customers have no idea where I sleep when I'm traveling. My customers have no idea which car I'm driving unless I'm buying their lunch.

 

All you do to set yourself up as an escort should be surrounded by MYSTERY. That's what clients are buying anyway. We want to escape our everyday hassles, be guaranteed a good time with no drama from our hires. We want to have a time of rest and relaxation - not of scheduling difficulties because the escort they're trying to hire cannot check into his hotel room until after 2 PM.

 

This is so perfect. I don't even tell new clients where I live until I can see their car parked at the top of my road. Existing clients are different and I make exception if someone is disabled.

 

Booking a new escort is about the unknown and although I am as open as I can be about who I am on forums likes this, my twitter account and blog, I am still someone none of you will ever really know and as I have said before, I am not even too fussed about knowing a clients real name, it's likely to be false anyway so whilst working and hiring in this industry, please keep some of your personal life..... personal.

 

I don't agree with escorts showing face pics. I've never done it but it's never done me any harm and many gentlemen on here know what I look like because we've exchanged messages and emails and I've given them a face to the name. That is my choice to make but mystique, the word you were looking for is what escort work is all about.

 

I don't show my face because I have another freelance job and some of the people I work for wouldn't be amused. Once your face is out here, you can never take it back. There are too many archive sites like wayback machine http://www.archive.org who keep copies of everything that's ever been published.

[Mocha]

Is that a subtle diss. I routinely stay in Marriotts and Hiltons. I frequently have early check-ins around Noon without being asked to pay additional. I cannot believe that a Noon check-in is that out of order for a hotel room. People travel, people need to be accommodated. This whole idea of early check-in's being impossible is weird.

 

Sounds like you need to decide if you are vacationing or visiting. If you're vacationing what are you doing advertising? If you're a visiting escort, why don't you have a hotel room? You really can't successfully play both roles simultaneously.

 

This all comes down to you telling too much of your circumstances to the client which interrupts their reason for calling you. I'm a traveling sales person. My customers have no idea where I sleep when I'm traveling. My customers have no idea which car I'm driving unless I'm buying their lunch.

 

Ever go to Disneyland/Disney World? Where are the delivery trucks and the garbage trucks, and the off-duty characters out of uniform? You never see them. Because Disney is all about Imagining being away from everyday cares. What happens with you needs to be behind the scenes, not put on display for the client.

 

I see part of where you're coming from with that, but comparing the doings of 1 escort to a billion dollar industry with over 50 years of business is a bit of a stretch. And that's not to say they haven't had their share of expose's'. And whether they see behind the scenes or not, when the credit card bill comes out, it won't be a fantasy anymore Lol. I prefer to offer a service where fantasy BECOMES a reality. Not the one where I'm swindling clients into timeshares and ripping them off every nickel and dime. Yeah, if my working name was Disney, I'd be a billionaire too! Yeah, I can just book an expensive hotel at my 1 hour rate, collect the money upfront, and then turn around and drop the hotel bill saying the fee is just to walk into the door. They have to pay EXTRA for anything else. Each kiss is $100, orgasm $200. Not included in ticket price. GOOD IDEA! I'll learn from Disney! http://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowUserReviews-g34515-d143394-r3570426-Walt_Disney_World-Orlando_Florida.html

 

Even if I was able to check in at noon, it still would have taken time to do that. I couldnt check in at noon when the appointment was for noon. Either the client would be waiting, or he'd be waiting in the lobby while I'm checking in (happened before, it's one of my pet peeves). Rather, I foreseen the situation and asked for adjustments accordingly.

 

I honestly don't see what's so dramatic about saying,

 

"hi there, I'm still available for Saturday, but is it possible to arrive a bit later in the afternoon, like around 2. I will be checking in Saturday."

 

Followed by:

 

"Hey there's no need for you to get a place just because of me we can go ahead and cancel and that'll make it better for you"

 

What is that? That's all verbatim from the text messages. I forgot, I never even mentioned anything about check in times. Reading back thru the text message, I wonder if this was destined to happen regardless.

[Mocha]

I don't agree with escorts showing face pics. I've never done it but it's never done me any harm and many gentlemen on here know what I look like because we've exchanged messages and emails and I've given them a face to the name. That is my choice to make but mystique, the word you were looking for is what escort work is all about.

 

I don't show my face because I have another freelance job and some of the people I work for wouldn't be amused. Once your face is out here, you can never take it back. There are too many archive sites like wayback machine http://www.archive.org who keep copies of everything that's ever been published.

 

Rubbish. Many escorts do porn, not just show their face. And with the proliferation of stolen pics/cat fishing, anyone can be an escort, porn star, or man in Nigeria with a deceased father who was an engineer.

 

i don't think many escorts would agree with your not agreeing. Especially some of the hardcore, uninhibited, social media open types that also show their face.

[SteveEscort]

Rubbish. Many escorts do porn, not just show their face. And with the proliferation of stolen pics/cat fishing, anyone can be an escort, porn star, or man in Nigeria with a deceased father who was an engineer.

 

i don't think many escorts would agree with your not agreeing. Especially some of the hardcore, uninhibited, social media open types that also show their face.

 

You didn't understand my point in anyway whatsoever.

 

It was in reply to the word Mystery and I said I do not agree, I did not say that anyone else shared my view or had to share my view. Yes I don't agree with escorts showing their face. I never said they couldn't but once you have shown your face as an escort, it is very hard to take it back, that was my point that you missed totally. So many girls and guys do this work to get themselves through college or to buy their first house and when they become a senior medical practitioner at 32 they wouldn't necessarily want their healthcare colleagues or bosses or staff to discover they were once an escort. That is my point. I have another job and I do work for an organisation who would not be amused at seeing my face on an escort website. You completely missed my point. You felt pressured over the hotel and felt down because you were let down, young escorts feel the need to show their faces because clients seem to expect it these days but the clients don't have to live with the consequences of doing such actions.

 

Having been around for years I know too many examples of escorts being outed and so my point was that mystery and telling as little as possible is a good thing. If I was in a meeting for my other job that over run and had an appointment booked in I would tell the client something general, not necessarily the truth because the truth could identify what I was really doing, but something that sounds acceptable like a yearly hospital check up that took 15 minutes longer than usual etc

[wklucas]

"""Charging you extra for coming to Palm Springs wasn't outrageous. You contacted a San Diego escort for a Palm Springs appointment and you agreed to the price he quoted.

The outrageous part was the dumbass didn't have enough sense to keep his mouth shut."""

 

 

of course, I fully agree.....if he had not volunteered the info, I would have been none the wiser & would not have had any kind of lingering resentment over the upcharge at all.....the initial negotiation was a price that I wholly agreed to when he said he would be making the drive solely for me.....when that morphed into something else on his part & he actually disclosed the info, I stayed silent but inwardly miffed.....a bit.....or maybe a lot.....(my use of the word "outrageous" was just me being dramatic)

[Mocha]

You didn't understand my point in anyway whatsoever.

 

Yes I don't agree with escorts showing their face. I never said they couldn't but once you have shown your face as an escort, it is very hard to take it back, that was my point that you missed totally.

 

I understood exactly what you said. You based your views and opinions and said you don't agree with what someone else chooses to do, e.g. Show face. You just said it. I'm saying that's Rubbish because unless you're paying Kevin or Killians bills....I don't think you can tell them to not show their face. Which is what you just did. I'm sure in time, once all the old conservatives die off, and we'll have a new wave of generation that forces legislation to consider sex work as part of the EEOC that prevents employers from barring or firing someone based on a job in adult entertainment. As that would be considered discrimination. But, we aren't there yet...so there is validity to your concerns.

 

Anyhow, back to the original intent of the thread. Moral of the story: Not every escort is sitting in a hotel, legs open, holding their phone waiting for the next client to walk in the door. Some of us like to incorporate work and personal affairs, making concessions for both and collaborating them together, yet independently. Thus, this creates a more balanced trip, and the escort isn't bored and the client doesnt feel like he's a conveyor belt at an assembly line. Sounds like a happy medium for both parties. That isn't to say that a work-only trip will be that way, but in my experience..going to a city JUST for work is boring, especially if you're there for a week or 2.

[SteveEscort]

You just said it. I'm saying that's Rubbish because unless you're paying Kevin or Killians bills....I don't think you can tell them to not show their face. Which is what you just did

 

 

Errrrm just excuse me one little moment

 

I did not tell anyone not to show their face. I said I didn't agree with it, there is a very distinct difference. My post has never and was never directed at anyone. I've never told you or anyone else for that matter to do anything of the sort.

 

Get your facts right and I will steer away from this post if you continue to twist things people say.

[Steven_Draker]

However, when booking something like Hyatt, Marriott, etc, it's always going to be after noon.

 

It depends who is checking in ... Marriott goes out of their way to satisfy their most loyal customers. I've checked in at many Marriott hotels early mornings and checked out after 6:00PM for no extra charge whatsoever.

 

Build a status with one particular chain and stick with it. You'll see the rewards coming in pretty soon.