TRYING to be an INDEPENDENT man.. and I fucked up!

[DavidGartner]

So yea... Here I am thinking to myself what a cinch to change my oil..noooo biggie at all!! Learning of course the valuable trade skills months ago from cowboys I had met on the journey. Apparently my eyes were lookin at his cock more then I was payin attention to where he was feedin the oil. Well thats a lie its proly because I am weak as shit and I couldnt save Poppeys Stick wife Olive if my life depended on it!!

 

I get all the stuff out that I had bought, Rench to remove the oil screw at the bottom to drain it, oil filter, and 4 quarts of oil.. oh and a pan to drain the oil into. So i unscrew it, oil drains out... check! thats done! now.. theres the filter .. *wraps hands tightly around filter** and YOINKKKK damn.. it wont budge!! Again I try and squeeze.. its NOT coming off!! WTF ( what the fuck ) ok ok calm down calm down and so i think to myself *calm blue ocean, calmmm blue ocean* IM pacing back and forth wondering what do i do if i cant get it off.. so I look around for something to bang the filter with .. in hopes it may loosen something.. i cant find anything but i do find sand paper.. I put it around the filter and its a perfect grip.. no slippin in my hands.. and i TWIST!!!!!! my veins bulging through my forehead!! erghhhhh no... i still cant budge it. so after MULTIPLE attempts I finally jus give up. I kinda jus stood there staring at the car with a smirk on my face thinking .. "You shitty mthr fkr* I of course can BARELY move my arms as they are in this comotos state. I can barely flip my cell phone open.. actually I can barely lift my arm up period! so yup.. damn car still parked. and i gotta bring it in today.. to Toyota.

 

Lets sing a song everyone " David is a moron.. yes he issss... david is a moron.. yea he is" Of course singing that in the theme song from "someone is sleepin ma lord .. coombayaaa" lol and of course another word of advice from Homer Simpson "DOH!" thanks for tunin in. to David Gartner's crisis of the day!

[Guest lookin4lust]

At least you gave it a good try.

 

I tried rebuilding the carburetor on my '72 Impala. I thought "How hard could this be? I do well in school. I know how to read a diagram.". You buy a kit, take it apart, clean it, and then put it back together. Turns out the only carb I could handle was the one on my bong. I put it together, and it seemed to be working. Then I realized gas was leaking. It died shortly therafter. I had to buy a rebuilt carb and have a mechanic install it.

The only thing I ever learned how to do successfully was change a tire. And I had to learn that, because as a poor student I used to ride my tires til the threads showed through. Now that I have free road service with my car's extended warranty, I don't even try to change my tires anymore.

The only time I get grease on my hands is when I'm working in the kitchen or playing in the bedroom.

[JamesK840]

Much like building your own computer, it seems like an easy way to save money. If you fully know what your doing and there are no complications. But hit one little snag, it all goes out the window. There's an oil-filter removal tool, kind of a bar with a strap on it, but after you buy all that, is it really worth it?

 

Wishing you'd paid the $29 to quick lube? Wait 'till you get the tow bill + the dealership's bill. BTW, you may want to spring for Synthetic oil, supposedly makes the engine last longer, but costs a lot more.

[BuckyXTC]

Hi David:

 

Changing oil in a car or truck is not as easy as it used to be, and that is by design. These days, the oil filter is usually located where it is hardest to get to, unless you have a setup like JiffyLube where you can easily do so from beneath the car, or a variety of "specialty" wrenches.

 

A rule of thumb to follow with oil filters is that the longer you go between oil changes, the harder it will be to remove the filter. Another problem is that to avoid leaks, many folks overtighten them when they put them on, so they become a real mother to remove.

 

Most auto parts stores like AutoZone or NAPA have filter wrenches that "custom fit" the filter your car uses. If you buy one of those, and have a socket wrench that fits it, you should have little trouble removing the filter in the future, as long as you don't overtighten the replacement filter. The key to a good seal is properly lubricating the filter gasket on the new filter with some oil before installing it, and tightening the filter only as much as is recommended by your owner's manual or the filter manufacturer's instructions. In most cases, this means only about as tight as you can tighten it by hand, without the use of a wrench. Hope this helps, if you ever decide to do your own oil change again.

[atlnightnurse]

David, I loved reading your post, I bet you are cute as can be and super fun to spend time with. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I hope you were careful not to start your car after you drained the oil, that would have been a very expensive oil change, but if you replaced the oil pan plug, you could have added the oil you bought and then went anywhere to have the filter/oil changed. Here's hoping all worked out well, take care, and if you happen back to Atlanta, I want to meet you!!!

[taylorky]

LOL ....and i thought i was mechanically challenged!

just kidding bud:-)