Today's Review of Hayden - "Are You Too Proud to Admit Being Scammed?"

[jgoo]

Gman, it's good to be introspective when your hiring leads to to being scammed constantly. One the other hand, I doubt it's simply bad luck if someone is continually being scammed. It's more like self-fulfilling results of bad vetting and hiring.

 

The rules, restated here so frequently I cannot believe BC need to attempt his 'catalog',

1. Only hire well-reviewed escort and by well-reviewed, I mean from an independent site - Daddy's.

2. Tell the escort what you want. Get his agreement to the $ and the plan.

3. Don't be afraid to walk away if the guy who shows up isn't as advertised. Pretty simple.

 

Just a comment, and while I agree for the most part with the above "rules", the first rule doesn't always work well for those of us who may live in some cities that don't have the luxury of many escorts who have been reviewed and the selection is somewhat limited.

 

The other point on that rule is that is the ideal for those will low risk taking tolerance to being scammed and thank goodness there are others with higher risk tolerance because those are the ones who will try new escorts who have never been reviewed before. Otherwise we would end up with a stagnant pool of escorts to choose from which would make things pretty boring at the review side of this site.

 

My own experiences have been that early on in hiring (too many years ago to mention) I would have less than great experiences and some could be characterized as scams. Those instances have diminished as I gained more experience in due diligence, more self confidence in the hiring process as well as the actual meeting itself, and avoided situations where it would be difficult to walk away. I still have some less than satisfying encounters but part of that is because I am ok with a certain risk level and practical considerations of what is available in my city.

[+ Gar1eth]

Something always seemed not right with Hayden's ads. I was curious about him because he was local, His porn work consists of a couple videos for an obscure porn company a couple years ago, which I took as a bad sign. he's been advertising for quite awhile, but never had sex? And the jacking up of the price?

 

I didn't know this guy had done porn in the past. Assuming it was more than solo videos, then I have to think that if he wasnt actually intending to scam the OP, and that the OP had told him beforehand that he was intending to have sex, then the escort looking uncomfortable and stating that he had never had sex with clients before was very likely a means of trying to get away with performing the least amount he could with the client.

 

Now if in general he wasnt ok with all the client's desires, I could see him being nervous about the entire encounter. But he probably should never have accepted the appointment to begin with. I'm assuming as usual that Daddy gave him a chance to reply to this review and he didn't. He may later. It seems to me that occasionally I've seen escorts reply back after the review has been published. But I'm not even sure the escort is still advertising. I have to say that I am so glad that I am not attracted to these really young ones. I think that there very possibly is a higher rate of non satisfaction with them due to their inexperience.

 

Gman

[jimboivyo]

Just a comment, and while I agree for the most part with the above "rules", the first rule doesn't always work well for those of us who may live in some cities that don't have the luxury of many escorts who have been reviewed and the selection is somewhat limited

 

save your money and fly them in. its what plenty of folks do now when their city doesn't have good reliability

[jgoo]

save your money and fly them in. its what plenty of folks do now when their city doesn't have good reliability

 

Obviously that is an alternative (as well as flying to them) that may work for some but others may not want to limit hiring so much (flying someone in can add up to be quite a bit) or want to do as long an appointment. If someone is so risk adverse to only hire well reviewed guys then that certainly is an option but is not for everyone and that "rule" should be considered accordingly.

[TruHart1]

...I have to say that I am so glad that I am not attracted to these really young ones. I think that there very possibly is a higher rate of non satisfaction with them due to their inexperience.

 

Gman

 

As Gman points out, he is happy not to be attracted to the really young ones. I would add to my previous post that I do tend to go for the more mature, established escorts which is why I think my success rate has so far been so high. An exception was Peter Hung who is 27 and whose ad (and email correspondence) gives indication of his mature thinking and his open look (when his face is not pixilated.)

 

Still, the first time I set eyes on this beautiful young man I was surprised and a bit fearful of how very youthful he looks. Thank goodness Peter proved those doubts completely groundless as he is one of those mature souls in a young man’s hot, hot body! He’s certainly become a man I will try to see every time I visit Las Vegas!!!

 

TruHart1

[bcohen7719]

Just a comment, and while I agree for the most part with the above "rules", the first rule doesn't always work well for those of us who may live in some cities that don't have the luxury of many escorts who have been reviewed and the selection is somewhat limited.

 

The other point on that rule is that is the ideal for those will low risk taking tolerance to being scammed and thank goodness there are others with higher risk tolerance because those are the ones who will try new escorts who have never been reviewed before. Otherwise we would end up with a stagnant pool of escorts to choose from which would make things pretty boring at the review side of this site.

 

My own experiences have been that early on in hiring (too many years ago to mention) I would have less than great experiences and some could be characterized as scams. Those instances have diminished as I gained more experience in due diligence, more self confidence in the hiring process as well as the actual meeting itself, and avoided situations where it would be difficult to walk away. I still have some less than satisfying encounters but part of that is because I am ok with a certain risk level and practical considerations of what is available in my city.

 

Jgoo,

 

You make an excellent point in establishing a distinction between "high tolerance" to being

scammed vs. "low tolerance."

 

This is far gentler language than being told one is "too picky."

 

Thank you very much for underscoring, or bringing up,

this most helpful insight in a nice way.

 

BC

[instudiocity]

Your vetting skills are admirable! I wish I had your batting

average. Very jealous!

 

BC

Judging by your posts here, you tend to overthink everything.

 

Maybe be even seeing the worst possible outcomes, first.

 

Follow ow the airline pilot's mantra, "Sit back, relax, enjoy the flight"

[imrthr]

Judging by your posts here, you tend to overthink everything.

 

Maybe be even seeing the worst possible outcomes, first.

 

Follow ow the airline pilot's mantra, "Sit back, relax, enjoy the flight"

 

 

I don't believe that he is guilty of "overthink" of "everything" by expressing his justified concerns.

 

Face it, this forum has disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements posted by supposed escorts. Those disclosures justify caution and concern.

 

Perhaps some on this forum are guilty of not thinking enough about the dangers and the high probability of problems, when answering a potentially bogus escort ad.

 

Of course, those who exclusively hire "reviewed" escorts significantly lower the probability for a problem.

 

It is wonderful that some have reported hiring escorts without problems associated with the hire. As I previously wrote, I assign luck to these fortunate individuals.

-

[jimboivyo]

my take: I believe the op does overthink and is beginning to look at things in a negative, skewed way

 

maybe he just needs to take a break from hiring for a little bit

[bcohen7719]

I don't believe that he is guilty of "overthink" of "everything" by expressing his justified concerns.

 

Face it, this forum has disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements posted by supposed escorts. Those disclosures justify caution and concern.

 

Perhaps some on this forum are guilty of not thinking enough about the dangers and the high probability of problems, when answering a potentially bogus escort ad.

 

Of course, those who exclusively hire "reviewed" escorts significantly lower the probability for a problem.

 

It is wonderful that some have reported hiring escorts without problems associated with the hire. As I previously wrote, I assign luck to these fortunate individuals.

-

 

Thanks, mvan1! Agreed, the lucky, fortunate individuals

on this forum are to be congratulated--and listened to.

Even many of the 'negative' comments on this

thread have tidbits of very good advice.

 

One or two guys erupted into awful screaming.

For this I am very sorry, and had no intention

of creating any upset.

 

BC

[imrthr]

Thanks, mvan1! Agreed, the lucky, fortunate individuals

on this forum are to be congratulated--and listened to.

Even many of the 'negative' comments on this

thread have tidbits of very good advice.

 

One or two guys erupted into awful screaming.

For this I am very sorry, and had no intention

of creating any upset.

 

BC

 

 

You did not create any upset.

 

Remember, "It Takes a Village" when it involves a learning process or recounting of experiences.

-

[instudiocity]

Judging by your posts here, you tend to overthink everything.

 

Maybe be even seeing the worst possible outcomes, first.

 

Follow ow the airline pilot's mantra, "Sit back, relax, enjoy the flight"

 

I don't believe that he is guilty of "overthink" of "everything" by expressing his justified concerns.

 

Face it, this forum has disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements posted by supposed escorts. Those disclosures justify caution and concern.

 

Perhaps some on this forum are guilty of not thinking enough about the dangers and the high probability of problems, when answering a potentially bogus escort ad.

 

Of course, those who exclusively hire "reviewed" escorts significantly lower the probability for a problem.

 

It is wonderful that some have reported hiring escorts without problems associated with the hire. As I previously wrote, I assign luck to these fortunate individuals.

-

Speaking of overthinking, how did you get GUILTY or NOT GUILTY out of 'tend to overthink'... geez... and now we see you have taken up BC's BROAD BRUSH as you write, 'disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements'...

 

The forum provides discussion - it's anonymous, it's practical and it's error-prone.

 

Remember, I can have The Escort Experience of a Lifetime with an Escort. The next day, you could rate the escort negatively. It's all in how we each individually perceive him and our experiences. But when a client repeatedly strikes out in hiring great escorts? The client is doing something wrong. Just read the escort responses to the negative reviews and you'll learn that. The client is not relating well with the escort. The client could have gamed out the entire encounter in his head and then been disappointed when the Escort did not respond as the client planned. Age differences can be huge.

 

Jessica Simpson's dad, age 54, mentioned in another thread today, has a 21 yo Hipster boyfriend, he cut his hair into a hipster hairstyle and changed his attire to hipster attire. I don't want to be a hipster, date a hipster or dress like a hipster, so I don't hire hipsters. (If you can't figure out what a hipster is, just look at the photos in those links.)

 

When I hire, I prefer younger men, but generally limit my hiring to no one under 25 for a reason - Under 25 year olds relate to their view of culture, and I cannot relate to them. By the time an escort is over 25 and got some reviews he understands how to relate to an older man. It's not that difficult to do. Look at the photos, read the ad copy, check the reviews and find someone who sounds and looks relatable to you, then check his reviews. Or check his reviews first to see how another client related to the Escort. I don't find 37 year old married guys as my comparison, I look more to SilverDollar myself.

[imrthr]

Speaking of overthinking, how did you get GUILTY or NOT GUILTY out of 'tend to overthink'... geez... and now we see you have taken up BC's BROAD BRUSH as you write, 'disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements'...

 

 

Like I wrote, it takes a village!

-

[bcohen7719]

Speaking of overthinking, how did you get GUILTY or NOT GUILTY out of 'tend to overthink'... geez... and now we see you have taken up BC's BROAD BRUSH as you write, 'disclosed hundreds, if not thousands, of bogus and fake advertisements'...

 

The forum provides discussion - it's anonymous, it's practical and it's error-prone.

 

Remember, I can have The Escort Experience of a Lifetime with an Escort. The next day, you could rate the escort negatively. It's all in how we each individually perceive him and our experiences. But when a client repeatedly strikes out in hiring great escorts? The client is doing something wrong. Just read the escort responses to the negative reviews and you'll learn that. The client is not relating well with the escort. The client could have gamed out the entire encounter in his head and then been disappointed when the Escort did not respond as the client planned. Age differences can be huge.

 

Jessica Simpson's dad, age 54, mentioned in another thread today, has a 21 yo Hipster boyfriend, he cut his hair into a hipster hairstyle and changed his attire to hipster attire. I don't want to be a hipster, date a hipster or dress like a hipster, so I don't hire hipsters. (If you can't figure out what a hipster is, just look at the photos in those links.)

 

When I hire, I prefer younger men, but generally limit my hiring to no one under 25 for a reason - Under 25 year olds relate to their view of culture, and I cannot relate to them. By the time an escort is over 25 and got some reviews he understands how to relate to an older man. It's not that difficult to do. Look at the photos, read the ad copy, check the reviews and find someone who sounds and looks relatable to you, then check his reviews. Or check his reviews first to see how another client related to the Escort. I don't find 37 year old married guys as my comparison, I look more to SilverDollar myself.

 

Thank you for sharing your valuable insights regarding the age of the escort.

This is good stuff! You're right, youngsters under 25 do tend to be "locked into"

their own culture. That's Generation Y or X or whatever, but they are of

a different world.

 

One has to put aside objections to over-thinking or under-thinking.

 

A long time ago, it seemed there was even a evolving "consensus" on this

forum that those acting like "thought police" also had a right

to their own opinions, even if they are somewhat startling.

 

BC

.

[bcohen7719]

Well said? I thought instudiocity's response was unduly harsh and picky, but that's just my opinion.

 

He may have had a very bad day.

We all do.

 

BC

[instudiocity]

Thank you for sharing your valuable insights regarding the age of the escort.

This is good stuff! You're right, youngsters under 25 do tend to be "locked into"

their own culture. That's Generation Y or X or whatever, but they are of

a different world.

 

One has to put aside objections to over-thinking or under-thinking.

 

A long time ago, it seemed there was even a evolving "consensus" on this

forum that those acting like "thought police" also had a right

to their own opinions, even if they are somewhat startling.

 

BC

.

Hiring escorts isn't like seeing a pretty boy and dreaming of what he can do to you or you can do to him... Hiring escorts is like taking this two-dimensional representation of a beauty and turning it into a 3-dimensional multi-faceted person loaded with testosterone, ego and a desire to earn money. I don't care what an escort says, he's with you because of an offer of cash for his presence. Some "escorts" are scamming you until they get your dollars. Some Gentlemen are giving you the treat of their presence - mind, soul and body. You've got to figure out how to vet someone so you understand the difference between a pretty boy who won't deliver anything and a man who is working at his profession...

 

One mustn't put aside objections to overthinking things. One must be practical assuming that 50% of the fault in every failed encounter belongs to the client. Either the client did not understand who/what/how he was hiring or the client failed in communicating what he wanted to hire in a proper fashion to the provider.

 

I've had an escort, repeat hire, say to me, "Ewe, creeper alert!" when I suggested something we could do. I had never heard 'Creeper Alert' in my life, until this 27 year old said it. But I instantly knew that what I'd suggested made him uncomfortable. I overstepped the bounds of our relationship, he alerted me, and we proceeded with mutually agreeable activities.

[instudiocity]

Like I wrote, it takes a village!

-

I perceive that you're a bit more ABSOLUTE in your village if you can go from 'tend to' to guilty... Me? I prefer Absolut on the Rocks with a hot guy beside me.

[leigh.bess.toad]

I know I'm the outlier here, but I think I have the only fool-proof method. Meet the guys first. I haven't hired anyone I haven't met in person first in a couple of years. Normally at a forum get-together such as the DC Luncheon or Palm Springs weekend. Getting to meet them in person, and interact with them in a social setting certainly removes a lot of BC's concerns. And the few guys I've ever hired I didn't meet in person first, I've communicated through the forum extensively before I ever hired them.

 

So if you can make PS weekend in a few weeks, that would be a great place to meet guys you might consider hiring. Or plan on the DC luncheon next January. Or think about the Fire Island event Killian James is trying to put together this summer. And getting to know them this way sure makes the hires a lot more successful too. At least they have for me.

[imrthr]

I perceive that you're a bit more ABSOLUTE in your village if you can go from 'tend to' to guilty... Me? I prefer Absolut on the Rocks with a hot guy beside me.

 

 

If you put down the ABSOLUT for a while, perhaps I can help you connect the dots - - - -

 

Look at what I wrote that upset you so much:

 

"I don't believe that he is guilty of "overthink" of "everything" by expressing his justified concerns."

 

You apparently are unhappy with the word “guilty” (you chose to CAPITALIZE GUILTY in your complaint) so let us change the sentence to the dictionary definition of guilty:

 

I don't believe that he is justly chargeable of "overthink" of "everything" by expressing his justified concerns.

 

Happy now?

[Phil_musc]

Well said? I thought instudiocity's response was unduly harsh and picky, but that's just my opinion.

 

+1

 

But now that I've actually read the entire thread, I notice in ISC's post #41 that there is less of the "arrogant-prick tone" that marked the other posts and actually shows a bit more humanity. There is hope.

 

The reviewer was scammed in my book - the guy was uncomfortable, claimed he had never done something before (good heavens, what might that have been??!!), and yet he has done some porn work - so I'm guessing he was flown in from heaven by Virgin Airlines where he engaged in some sort of performance that netted him some $$ - was he blind-folded throughout the shooting? The escort has 3 reviews at this point - the first one was pretty negative; the second one appears to have been a rehabilitation effort by a friend of the escort, and the third review which precipitated this whole sorry business.

 

I don't know the participants at all here, but I can certainly understand how an older client who isn't physically imposing could be intimidated by a younger escort. Depending on whether the client is "out" in his community may also enter into the equation. Yes, the ground rules that have been somewhat superciliously laid out here are good ones to remember, but we don't all play at the same game table and the cards are not equally dealt.

[bcohen7719]

Hiring escorts isn't like seeing a pretty boy and dreaming of what he can do to you or you can do to him... Hiring escorts is like taking this two-dimensional representation of a beauty and turning it into a 3-dimensional multi-faceted person loaded with testosterone, ego and a desire to earn money. I don't care what an escort says, he's with you because of an offer of cash for his presence. Some "escorts" are scamming you until they get your dollars. Some Gentlemen are giving you the treat of their presence - mind, soul and body. You've got to figure out how to vet someone so you understand the difference between a pretty boy who won't deliver anything and a man who is working at his profession...

 

One mustn't put aside objections to overthinking things. One must be practical assuming that 50% of the fault in every failed encounter belongs to the client. Either the client did not understand who/what/how he was hiring or the client failed in communicating what he wanted to hire in a proper fashion to the provider.

 

I've had an escort, repeat hire, say to me, "Ewe, creeper alert!" when I suggested something we could do. I had never heard 'Creeper Alert' in my life, until this 27 year old said it. But I instantly knew that what I'd suggested made him uncomfortable. I overstepped the bounds of our relationship, he alerted me, and we proceeded with mutually agreeable activities.

 

Instudio,

 

Everything you say makes an awful lot of sense. Many thanks

for this excellent stuff. The "creeper alert" story made me shiver...!

 

Believe me--if I could turn off my own over-thinking, I would have

done it a long time ago.

 

BC

[imrthr]

+1

 

But now that I've actually read the entire thread, I notice in ISC's post #41 that there is less of the "arrogant-prick tone" that marked the other posts and actually shows a bit more humanity. There is hope.

 

The reviewer was scammed in my book - the guy was uncomfortable, claimed he had never done something before (good heavens, what might that have been??!!), and yet he has done some porn work - so I'm guessing he was flown in from heaven by Virgin Airlines where he engaged in some sort of performance that netted him some $$ - was he blind-folded throughout the shooting? The escort has 3 reviews at this point - the first one was pretty negative; the second one appears to have been a rehabilitation effort by a friend of the escort, and the third review which precipitated this whole sorry business.

 

I don't know the participants at all here, but I can certainly understand how an older client who isn't physically imposing could be intimidated by a younger escort. Depending on whether the client is "out" in his community may also enter into the equation. Yes, the ground rules that have been somewhat superciliously laid out here are good ones to remember, but we don't all play at the same game table and the cards are not equally dealt.

 

 

This is a refreshing and splendid analysis of the initial post and subsequent responses. Thanks for thinking -

-

[adriano46]

To get back to the original point of this thread, there was a negative review of a DC escort called Hayden Borne.

 

OK gentlemen, take a breath. I can relate completely with the experience of BCohen with this escort.

 

A few weeks ago, just before the MAL weekend in DC this guy on multiple times through Rentmen tried to get me to hire him (even suggesting adding others to the mix).

 

He came across in communication as at times desperate, at times nonsensical, immature, and had a few red flags that convinced me to shut down communicating with him -- I had a sense he was a scam artist, and what BCohen write confirms that. Why this bad experience all of a sudden turned into some analysis of the client who was scammed is beyond me.

 

Does it not appear odd that the escort himself did not respond to the negative review? After all, they are often given an opportunity to respond. Hayden's silence speaks volumes and hopefully -- when the dust clears here from all the nit-picking and cheap analyzing, the gist of the review will help other clients in making a decision about hiring or moving on with this particular escort.

 

Isn't this why we constantly nag others to give a review and discuss their experiences here? But if the messenger now becomes also the victim, why bother?

[leigh.bess.toad]

After all, they are often given an opportunity to respond.

 

They are ALWAYS given an opportunity to respond. Some choose not to respond.

[instudiocity]

To get back to the original point of this thread, there was a negative review of a DC escort called Hayden Borne.

 

OK gentlemen, take a breath. I can relate completely with the experience of BCohen with this escort.

 

A few weeks ago, just before the MAL weekend in DC this guy on multiple times through Rentmen tried to get me to hire him (even suggesting adding others to the mix).

 

He came across in communication as at times desperate, at times nonsensical, immature, and had a few red flags that convinced me to shut down communicating with him -- I had a sense he was a scam artist, and what BCohen write confirms that. Why this bad experience all of a sudden turned into some analysis of the client who was scammed is beyond me.

 

Does it not appear odd that the escort himself did not respond to the negative review? After all, they are often given an opportunity to respond. Hayden's silence speaks volumes and hopefully -- when the dust clears here from all the nit-picking and cheap analyzing, the gist of the review will help other clients in making a decision about hiring or moving on with this particular escort.

 

Isn't this why we constantly nag others to give a review and discuss their experiences here? But if the messenger now becomes also the victim, why bother?

your post presumes BCohen is the reviewer. I don't see that he clearly stated that in the OP.