The escort dictionary

[johnnyboy]

Beneath some translations of what an escort really wants to say in his ad:

 

- I have an nine inch cock: It is a bit more than seven inch.

- I am 38 years old: I am nearly 50 years old.

- I have a totally smooth body: Every two weeks I get completely waxed.

- I am always hard: I use Viagra.

- I have a short haircut: I am nearly bold.

- I have a sixpack: I am the king of Photoshop.

- I have a sun tanned body: I use bronzing powder.

- I am comfortable in every outfit: Buy me clothes and I will wear it.

- I have no preferences in the looks of other men: I really love myself.

- I am naturally blond: Yeah right, thanks to my hairdresser.

- I am versatile: Maybe you can top me for one minute.

- My cock is very fat: I use silicon injections.

 

Who has more suggestions. Also escorts are welcome to react with a client dictionary.

[bobchitown]

- All my attention is on you: When I'm not in the bathroom checking my messages.

- Pictures are current as of mm/dd/yy: But, they aren't mine.

[+ newatthis]

...I am versatile: Maybe you can top me for one minute...

I am versatile: maybe I'll get hard this time around.

[+ glutes]

And 20 reasons you cannot believe what you read on a internet profile, period. Care of Steven Draker!

 

 

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_j0_0cXEXWWU/RploIp2LswI/AAAAAAAAAyI/U4iv-li5I-s/s1600/internet-profile.jpg

[jimboivyo]

wow. sounds like we've got some bitter guys here. perhaps doing a little homework on your next escort is in order.

[+ glutes]

"My punter is a A+ student at Hooville High!"

 

Some of us do do our homework jimboiNOTbn.

 

Take a look at the post dated 11/15/2011:

 

http://www.datalounge.com/cgi-bin/iowa/ajax.html?t=10037163#page:showThread,10037163,30

[instudiocity]

wow. sounds like we've got some bitter guys here. perhaps doing a little homework on your next escort is in order.

 

Some of us do do our homework jimboiNOTbn.

 

Take a look at the post dated 11/15/2011:

 

http://www.datalounge.com/cgi-bin/iowa/ajax.html?t=10037163#page:showThread,10037163,30

 

Wow! Talking about being a stalker. Talking about being off-topic in a thread. Talking about carrying a grudge. I mean GEEZ!

[jimboivyo]

Some of us do do our homework jimboiNOTbn.

 

Take a look at the post dated 11/15/2011:

 

http://www.datalounge.com/cgi-bin/iowa/ajax.html?t=10037163#page:showThread,10037163,30

 

 

from the looks of it, anyone can post anything at that website. and from the looks of your post here, I wouldn't be shocked if it were you who posted it to begin with.

 

you're a sad man and it shows every time you post something.

[+ glutes]

Mama Mia!

 

from the looks of it, anyone can post anything at that website.

 

And anyone come post a 'review': speedoman / JimGlitter / Mama Mia...

 

http://www.universalstudiosentertainment.com/assets_c/2010/04/61101999_MAMMA_MIA_800x445-thumb-497xauto-652.jpg

[jjkrkwood]

i TURN HEADS = I AM SO UGLY, EVERYONE LOOKS THE OTHER WAY

I LOOK BETTER THAN MY PICS = I DONT GET ENUF BUSINESS TO HAVE NEW PICS TAKEN

HUNG XXL = THIS IS AN XXLIE

[+ friendofsheila]

Client dictionary:

 

Toned - I don't exercise at all, but I've cut back from 3 bags of Famous Amos a night to 2

[+ friendofsheila]

Client dictionary:

 

Toned - I don't exercise at all, but I've cut back from 3 bags of Famous Amos a night to 2

[JT Brooklyn]

And 20 reasons you cannot believe what you read on a internet profile, period. Care of Steven Draker!

 

 

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_j0_0cXEXWWU/RploIp2LswI/AAAAAAAAAyI/U4iv-li5I-s/s1600/internet-profile.jpg

 

Just about says it all! Thanks Again S.D.