Im a New Escort

[DavidGartner]

Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

[Guest unlimited_horizons2002]

start telling us what YOU have to offer}>

[alanalt]

What do I look for?

 

# 1 -- A Website

It doesn't have to be fancy (in fact I usually prefer that it isn't) A few photos, an idea of what the escort's likes/dislikes (both in and out of the bedroom and the more explicit, the better!) and location/travel/rates and contact info.

 

A website tells me that the escort is taking this somewhat seriously, that he's interested in 'marketing' himself and that he's more likely to respond to my e-mail. About 80% of the escorts I've hired have had at least a minimal homepage (and the others were well reviewed on this site).

 

#2 The rest of it...

When I'm looking for an escort, I'm looking for a good-looking guy to spend some time with, to shoot the breeze with and who'll indulge my sexual fantasies. I'm not looking for a new-age philosopher (sp?) but someone who's company I think that I'll enjoy.

 

Don't know if this helps at all, but I hope it does. The other thing that I would suggest is that you e-mail some of the better-reviewed escorts or those who are active message board participants. They may not respond but if they do, it should be a gold-mine of valuable info for you!:-)

 

It's an 'interesting' profession and I wish you well!:-)

 

Alan

[OneFinger]

I'm in total agreement with Alanalt, a website is a must! Also agree that something simple and easy to navigate is the best. One of my biggest irritations are those websites that take forever to load. DSL isn't available in all areas and some of us still use dial-up modemns.

 

Another thing that I like is to make initial contact via e-mail. An escort that responds quickly gets high marks in my book. Based on their e-mail response, I'll then call them to set up the initial meeting. But, a quick e-mail that doesn't address my specific questions and is full of spelling errors usually eliminates a follow-up phone call.

 

Hygene, discretion, and confidentiality are also requirements. I sometimes include longer dates which includes dinner or a show before the bedroom activities. On those occassions, the escort must be somone that I can take out in public and dresses appropriately for the evening. (I'm not talking tux and tails here, I'm merely saying that nice slacks, button-down shirt, etc. are preferable to jeans and a t-shirt. And, yes, I always indicate up-front when jeans are not appropriate.)

 

I also prefer someone with to an out-going personality. In fact, I find myself more drawn to an escorts personaltiy and manners than their looks. I like someone who can carry on a pleasant conversation and includes an evening of more than just sex. In fact, one escort suggested that we play "20 Questions" to guess his full-time job. It sure broke the ice on our initial date.

 

For me, the escort experience is more than just sex. It's an evening of entertainment and stimulation. It's the temporary fulfillment of fantasy before returning to the reality of my boring life.

[Guest in yer face]

I can tell you these things:

 

1. Remain true to yourself. Youll need alot of self respect when you come in contact with people that dont respect you at all (and you will).

 

2.Remember that you are allowed to say no, and to define your limitations. If you dont want to see a client, then dont. Just remember to cancel properly if you are already booked.

 

3.Charge as much as you can, dont undersell yourself or undercut other escorts, because there is wear and tear and you are only cheating yourself in the long run.

 

4. Only take as many calls as you can handle. Too much work makes you lazy and tired, and your bad performances will be reported on this webpage.

 

5. Remember that this webpage is only a small part of your working income. If you do get a bad review, its not the end of the world. Wait until you are calm, and write a careful reply. Make it as classy as possible, and move on.

 

6. Never ask for cash upfront.

 

7. Spell yourself out on your webpage in a clear, yet careful way.

 

8. DOnt read this message board too much. There will be times that you dont really want to know what the clients really think about the escorts they hire.

 

 

>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

[Guest ncm2169]

Hey I don't mean to be cute here, but a self-pic that would actually show on this site might be helful also (I think I've seen at least 4 or 5 posts from you here that all include your pic, but NONE of them show up on my screen).

[Will]

You must have a website. I don't think it's an option any longer.

 

And if you want to get a client like me, stop calling yourself "Stud Myster," or however you spell it. It sounds like an adolescent character on Saturday Night Live or Mad TV. If you really are a "stud" and a "meister," let your clients fine out. They'll say so.

[Rod Hagen]

Very well said In Yer Face.

[Boston Guy]

>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

 

Hi David,

 

First, I think the advice given to you by "In Yer Face" is terrific. You'll do well to follow his suggestions or at least to consider them carefully. If it were me, I might print them out and keep them on hand for reference on days that aren't going so well -- and there will be some of those.

 

Please consider what he says, especially, about respecting yourself. This is not the same at all as arrogance; quite the contrary, true respect for oneself usually leads to respect for those around us and from respect flows consideration. As an independent contractor, so to speak, you will need to keep your self-respect intact and flowing every day, on good days and bad, on busy days and on those days when you wonder where the money is going to come from.

 

It's been my experience that escorts who treat their clients with respect, as they would like to be treated themselves, last longer in this business and make more money. I think they're also happier.

 

Part of respecting other people is keeping your promises -- and your appointments. If you are at all disorganized (I was, somewhat, at your age), use a calendar for all of your escort-related work. Try to arrive promptly (or even five minutes early) for every appointment and, if you're running late, try to communicate that to your client before you're already late, not after.

 

What you've embarked on is establishing a small business. That's a great American tradition. Consider the example of companies that have done well in America. Why did they succeed? What about their product or service made them successful? why did lots of people want to buy from them?

 

Most of the answer centers around consistency and good value: people know what they're getting when they buy the product, it's good and consistent and it performs as promised. Think of McDonald's: you can buy a McDonald's hamburger anywhere in the world, almost, and you get the same thing. You know ahead of time what you're getting, you get it fast, it's hot and good (at least for those McDonald's fans among us).

 

If you can deliver consistent service to your customers, always deliver what you promise, deliver it with a smile, and charge a reasonable fee, you'll be off to a great start. And since the product you're offering is a personal service, consider adding some little extra to each appointment. You'll be amazed at how appreciative people can be.

 

Maybe it will only be saying to someone "Hey, you're a nice guy and I'm having fun. Let's spend another 15 minutes together on my nickel." Or maybe you'll have a few minutes and you'll offer to take your client out for a cup of coffee afterward. The cost to you for these kinds of things is quite small, in both time and money. But they can help you build a loyal following.

 

Then think about why guys are hiring you. Each client will be unique and will have his own motives. Some will be looking for a hot young guy for hot sex; some will be looking for romance; some are lonely in their lives and need a personal touch; some are uncomfortable in their skinds and need reassurance; some are unsure of themselves as gay men and need guidance.

 

You might take a tip from successful bartenders the world around: become a good listener. Get your clients talking. Ask questions. Ask them general questions that aren't too personal but might allow them to open up to you, if they want to.

 

Don't ask "So, how's the wife and kids." :-) But you might ask "What do you like to do for fun?" or "Where did you grow up?" or even just "Tell me about yourself" or "Are you happy?" Then listen, really listen. Give them time to fully answer the question. Then, follow it up with another and then really listen again.

 

Good listening can be hard to do. You have to concentrate and really think about the other person. You have to be willing to let the pauses grow a bit without jumping right in. But it's a great skill and, if you cultivate it, you'll do two things: first, you'll get to know your clients better and why they hired you, which will help you figure out how to make them happier; and you'll give them a chance to talk out loud about themselves. You'll be amazed at what they'll tell you, the secrets they'll reveal, the dreams, passions, frustrations. Ask any bartender or barbar -- or escort. And when they leave, they'll think you're a terrific guy.

 

One last thing. Compare the question you asked when you started this thread to the answer you got from "In Yer Face". You said:

 

>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

 

He responded with carefully written sentences, with words spelled out and proper punctuation. This might seem like a small point, but it isn't, not really.

 

If you want people to hire you, you need to make them think that you're worth hiring. Unless you are striving to establish a reputation as a young teenager type, you need to communicate in a way that makes you look bright, responsible, professional and interesting -- and sexy.

 

The style you used in your question is fine for certain circumstances, including email to friends, IM's, etc. But I'd like to suggest that communicating with prospective clients is important work for you. How you do it and how well you do it will probably make a big difference in how clients perceive you and how many choose to hire you. In very many ways, your words are your image and your image is you.

 

Instead of writing:

 

>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

 

you might have written:

 

>Hi. I'm a new escort and I'm looking for pointers. I'm wondering >what clients expect in escort. What do you expect physically, >emotionally or otherwise? Any help or advice you can give me would >be great. Thanks for the help.

 

It's almost the same thing, but written out with full words (instead of "im" and "u") and with respect for your audience. You wouldn't write a cover letter for a resume in a very casual style; no employer would hire you if you did. But remember that every time you communicate with a prospect, you're essentially writing a cover letter for a resume again.

 

Good luck to you. There are a lot of guys here who know a lot about escorting, from both sides of the bed. "In yer face" is right about not reading this Message Center too frequently (or perhaps too seriously), but it's a great place to come ask questions. I'm glad you did.

 

Good luck.

BG

[BuckyXTC]

To the new escort:

 

Great advice from In Your Face, and a wonderful followup from Boston Guy. Take what they've said seriously, and you'll be off to a good start. Good luck and best wishes to you on your new venture.:-)

[Guest in yer face]

ITs funny. On rereading, I realize that you can apply these rules to just about anyones life or job. Who thought that I knew anything about anything?

 

 

>I can tell you these things:

>

>1. Remain true to yourself. Youll need alot of self respect

>when you come in contact with people that dont respect you

>at all (and you will).

>

>2.Remember that you are allowed to say no, and to define

>your limitations. If you dont want to see a client, then

>dont. Just remember to cancel properly if you are already

>booked.

>

>3.Charge as much as you can, dont undersell yourself or

>undercut other escorts, because there is wear and tear and

>you are only cheating yourself in the long run.

>

>4. Only take as many calls as you can handle. Too much work

>makes you lazy and tired, and your bad performances will be

>reported on this webpage.

>

>5. Remember that this webpage is only a small part of your

>working income. If you do get a bad review, its not the end

>of the world. Wait until you are calm, and write a careful

>reply. Make it as classy as possible, and move on.

>

>6. Never ask for cash upfront.

>

>7. Spell yourself out on your webpage in a clear, yet

>careful way.

>

>8. DOnt read this message board too much. There will be

>times that you dont really want to know what the clients

>really think about the escorts they hire.

>

>

>>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Greetings~

 

Everything these fellas have said is practical and just plain good advice. Let me add a few more to the list as well:

 

* Don't ever just 'pretend' to have a good time while with a client~ make it enjoyable for yourself and make it REAL! There's nothing worse than a meeting that feels like an escort should win the Tony for best performance in a Westin. Trust me, there's ALWAYS something attractive and beautiful about a client...

 

* Pure sex is only 25% of your success as an escort. Personality, commitment, timeliness, intelligence and flexibility are some key elements to succeeding in this particular world.

 

* A clean, uncluttered and color-coordinated website always helps.

 

* Always count your clients as friends: Live by the golden rule.

 

* Stay away from drugs. I've seen it rip apart both reputation and potential/continuing business of so many guys who were otherwise amazing people. Remember that with big money comes big responsiblity.

 

* When dealing with email, remember to expend on things and give good attention to detail, making your client feel like a true king. Too many escorts become ego driven and forget that it's 100% about the client unless noted otherwise. You're in a service-based industry. If you think of yourself as a concierge (with a few extra services), you'll be well off

 

 

I'm sure other tips will come to me tonight while i am trying to get to sleep, but until then, best of luck to you and if you ever need any help, advice or just someone to talk to feel free to email anytime.

 

 

 

Warmest Regards,

 

 

 

Benjamin Nicholas

[email protected]

http://www.ChiKindaKid.com

[Rick Munroe]

>Instead of writing:

>

>>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

>

>you might have written:

>

>>Hi. I'm a new escort and I'm looking for pointers. I'm wondering

>what clients expect in escort. What do you expect physically,

>emotionally or otherwise? Any help or advice you can give me would >be great. Thanks for the help.

 

That is horrible advice (as was Will's). Your suggestion sounds like it was lifted right out of an English as a Second Language textbook. Why would you want to erase any character or individuality from his writing? I don't think most people hire escorts based on their grammar & spelling, and he doesn't need to post like Boston Guy to get work. He's a cute kid with the right attitude. He asked what clients expect emotionally & physically; he didn't ask for literary criticism. We're selling our personalities as much as our bodies, and BG's example lacks personality.

[marc anthony]

>>Instead of writing:

>>

>>>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>>>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

>>

>>you might have written:

>>

>>>Hi. I'm a new escort and I'm looking for pointers. I'm wondering

>>what clients expect in escort. What do you expect physically,

>>emotionally or otherwise? Any help or advice you can give me would >be great. Thanks for the help.

>

>That is horrible advice (as was Will's). Your suggestion

>sounds like it was lifted right out of an English as a

>Second Language textbook. Why would you want to erase any

>character or individuality from his writing? I don't think

>most people hire escorts based on their grammar & spelling,

>and he doesn't need to post like Boston Guy to get work.

>He's a cute kid with the right attitude. He asked what

>clients expect emotionally & physically; he didn't ask for

>literary criticism. We're selling our personalities as much

>as our bodies, and BG's example lacks personality.

 

 

Rick: I agree with you. The literary style corrections were not necessary...not to mention that some of us twink-lovers like it wHeN tHe kEwl DudEs tAlK YoUnG 4 U.

:7

[mmk]

David,

 

my suggestions are-

 

1) Do not use your real name. For every normal person out there you might encounter a psycho or a fatal attraction or just some bitchy queen who does not have a life who might feel the need to "get back at you" because they feel you slighted them for some reason. You would not want this person tracking you down to your job or your Biology 101 class and making a scene.

 

2) Get a cell phone for escorting purposes only. If that means you have two cell phones, then so be it but keep the two separate.

 

3) If you are running late, then please call the person, even if it would only be 10 minutes. The majority of people do not mind if somoeone is running late, provided they are alerted to that fact by the person who is running late.

 

4) Go by your gut instinct. If you walk into a situation that does not feel right or makes you very uncomfortable, then leave. No amount of money is worth risking your life over.

 

5) Become very well read. Read the Sunday New York TImes cover to cover. Know about alot of stuff. You do not need to become an expert but just to be able to carry on an intellegent conversation with someone who might have an interest in a certain subject.

 

6) Always carry condoms and lube. You never know when someone you hve an appointment with might either not have them or expects you to bring them.

 

and finally, 7) I would not show my face. Full Body shots are fine but I would cover my face. You do not know how long you will be escorting. It could be for 6 months or 6 years. However, if and when you move on to something else, you would not want this to come back and bite you on the ass. It is possible that you would lose some business by not showing your face, but you do have to have a life after escorting. That is something else you need to think about.

[Guest 7Zach]

If you start to have bad feelings about doing any of this, like others said, follow your gut, but in this case, find something else to do for a living or extra money. Don't trap yourself into using the money to buy things that you think will make you feel better; it just starts a cycle that is hard to break.

As far as spelling, I like correct spelling - but it's more of a marketing issue - what is the type of client you're trying to get? Some here like twinks, others like more muscular bodies - others prefer something with the body and the mind.

Finally, be careful of your boundaries with the clients.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

A distinct personality can set you apart from the crowd, how true~

 

 

But also realize that with time passing so does your 'look', meaning you'll get older and the 'twink' label won't necessarily be so fitting. I find that writing an email is often like writing poetry~ everything you type is a reflection of who you are and in a way, it must flow like reading a good William Blake line. If not, your potential client will either loose interest or simply go onto the next 'apple of his eye.'

 

Quite simply, you can choose to play this role of 'kiddo' now, but think about the ramifications later. It's much easier to opt for up-front intelligence~ it's initially impressive and attractive in the longrun. A flighty first impression might not be the best way to go...

 

 

Whatever you choose, have fun and be incredibly safe~ Best of luck

 

 

 

 

Warmest Regards,

 

 

 

Benjamin Nicholas

[email protected]

http://www.ChiKindaKid.com

[bluenix]

>As far as spelling, I like correct spelling - but it's more

>of a marketing issue - what is the type of client you're

>trying to get?

 

Be still my heart. Somebody who actually understands rhetoric.

 

ALL effective communication begins with the answer to the question, 'Who is my audience.'

 

No, really.

[alanalt]

>

>ALL effective

>communication begins with the answer to the question, 'Who

>is my audience.'

>

>No, really.

 

Actually, I would argue that it begins with 'What's my message?', 'cause knowing your audience doesn't help unless you know what you're trying to tell them. THEN comes 'marketing':-)

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Wow... i absolutely love how this has turned into an advertising issue: One subject i'm actually degreed in

 

 

Initially, yes, you find your core audience and then create a base image from there. Just remember that the consumer, while wanting a product totally catered to their every whim, also wants continuity and familiarity as well. Thus, staking one's image on something as fleeting as youth would be fruitless~ as time passes and things begin to change physically, so would the percieved advertising image.

 

Honestly, how many guys have complained that an escort's picture didn't quite match what they saw in person? Obvious proof that an escort is not so 'youthful' anymore and is still clinging onto his pictures from the past...

 

It's easy to just look 'cute'... why not really try to impress your clients? If you're going to go for the 'cute' image up front, just remember in the future to transition into something more mature when the time comes...

 

 

That is, unless you to remain like the anomoly Madonna, who has figured out a way to remain 'young' well into her 40's. A round of applause goes out to her many image/style consultants

 

 

 

 

Warmest Regards,

 

 

 

Benjamin Nicholas

[email protected]

http://www.ChiKindaKid.com

[Boston Guy]

>>Instead of writing:

>>

>>>Hey guys, im wondering for pointers, what do u expect in an

>>>escort. like emotionally etc, physically.

>>

>>you might have written:

>>

>>>Hi. I'm a new escort and I'm looking for pointers. I'm wondering

>>what clients expect in escort. What do you expect physically,

>>emotionally or otherwise? Any help or advice you can give me would >be great. Thanks for the help.

>

>That is horrible advice (as was Will's). Your suggestion

>sounds like it was lifted right out of an English as a

>Second Language textbook. Why would you want to erase any

>character or individuality from his writing? I don't think

>most people hire escorts based on their grammar & spelling,

>and he doesn't need to post like Boston Guy to get work.

>He's a cute kid with the right attitude. He asked what

>clients expect emotionally & physically; he didn't ask for

>literary criticism. We're selling our personalities as much

>as our bodies, and BG's example lacks personality.

 

Perhaps the college professor in me still comes out occasionally without me knowing. :-)

 

But I believe firmly that effective written communication begins with a reasonable attempt to use normal spelling and reasonable grammar.

 

If I'm IM'ing a friend, we'll often drop into the 'u2', 'lol' and 'brb' world. But using that style when writing to prospects projects an image that might appeal to some people but will definitely turn off others.

 

Look at it this way: if an escort uses correct spelling and grammar, no one will notice; we don't don't notice what is 'normal'. But if that same escort uses Internet forms and misspellings, some people will notice and will react badly to it.

 

If an escort is really trying to take on a particular persona that depends on twinkisms, then using them might be effective. But if a young guy is just starting out and wants to be able to get his message spread as widely as possible, he'd do well to remember that most of his prospective clients are probably in their 30s or 40s or older and are used to conventional forms of writing.

 

Writing doesn't have to be devoid of personality or style just because it uses correct spelling and grammar. Your own writing here on this board clearly illustrates that.

 

I'm often asked for advice of one kind or another by young people who are just starting out on their careers. Sometimes the questions are about writing a resume or cover letter or how to be successful in applying for a job.

 

I think of young guys who are escorting as just as bright and just as motivated as the other guys their age. Choosing to escort doesn't suddenly make you a different person. So the advice I give to escorts when asked -- and it happens in person surprisingly often, surprising at least to me -- is consistent with the advice I give guys in other career tracks. Marketing is marketing, selling is selling and writing is writing.

 

The use of Internet conventions has its place, just as "ain't" has its place. But writing to prospective customers (including posting on this Message Center) does not strike me as the best place to use the most informal language.

 

There have been many times when I decided not to hire an escort because of the way he came across in writing, generally through email. I don't talk to all of the guys I consider and I certainly don't meet them all. Instead, the first contact (and sometimes the next few contacts) is through writing.

 

If someone responds to me in a way that makes him seem like someone who isn't going to be interesting to spend time with, I move on -- and I'm sure I'm not the only client who does so.

 

So, I'll say it again: use of conventional language (in your own style) will not frighten clients away, but might attract some. Use of language that is poorly phrased and full of misspellings won't attract any particular clients, but will cause some to move on.

 

Spell-checkers take 10 seconds to use. And I'm not looking for dissertation-quality writing. But I stand by my advice to him to consider the image he projects in his writing. Improving it will help him not only with clients but in other parts of his life as well, particularly as he grows older.

 

BG

[bluenix]

>Actually, I would argue that it begins with 'What's my

>message?', 'cause knowing your audience doesn't help unless

>you know what you're trying to tell them. THEN comes

>'marketing':-)

 

Um, wrong.

 

Because if you know your audience there are going to be times when you rightly decide that "your message" is not appropriate.

 

The better question, rather than asking "what is my message," is "how can I influence this audience."

 

Audience first, message second.

[Rick Munroe]

>Audience first, message second.

 

You're all wrong, guys. It's hot ass pic first, audience next, message last.

[Boston Guy]

>>Audience first, message second.

>

>You're all wrong, guys. It's hot ass pic first,

>audience next, message last.

 

Please note conventional spelling, capitalization and grammar... including stylistic choice of 'pic' over 'picture'. :-)

 

BG

[bluenix]

>>Audience first, message second.

>

>You're all wrong, guys. It's hot ass pic first,

>audience next, message last.

 

Nope. Your example falls right into my hands, so to speak.

 

You want to appeal to tops (audience), so you post a pic of your ass (message).

 

Carry on.