Gay Astrology

[+ purplekow]

I was chatting with a friend today about the upcoming Pride events. I have never been and he began telling a few stories of after parade festivities. At one point, he said: Ah that was the year of the double penetration. That led me to think that there should be a Gay Astrologic Calender. Twelve signs or symbols similiar to the Chinese Calendar or the Signs of the Zodiac and each year at Pride we can change Signs and give each other momentos significant for the upcoming year.

 

Well the first was easy to name, but perhaps difficulty to do:

1 The Year of Double Penetration In the year of double penetration one can reach new heights but care must be taken and details attended or it may lead to a painful experience.

 

2 The Year of the Twink Should be the first in the cycle. A return to

energetic playness and an appreciation of the hope for the future residing

in youth.

 

3 The Year of the Uniform Building on the YOT Twink playfulness, YOT uniform encourages us not only to enjoy the playfulness but to use it to expand our own horizons and to dress up a bit. .

 

4 The Year of the Drag Queen This year extends the idea of dress p and it is the year when one gets in touch with ones femininity. Flamboyance maybed as nothing is too much but genitility is the key.

 

5 The Year of the Speedo This is a year to celebrate firness and the pursuit of health and vitality. Speedo is the opposite of the year that follows as Speedos celebrate the clean, waxed and hairless body image. You may not want to deforest the wide expanses of your chest, legs and butt, but you can still aim for a body which any Speedo would love to caress.

 

6 The Year of the Bear Everything is bigger and burlier and of course hairier in the year of the bear. You can growl about getting older or you can celebrate your bearishness.

 

7 The Year of the Forgy This is a very social year in which large groups are the key. The year of the forgy celebrates the comminities ability to be inclusive and interactive and a bit crowded and sweaty.

 

8 The Year of the Closet While generally felt to be a year to reevaluate one's choices and the forces that lead one to live a more clandestine life, it should be realized that there are more men who are Closets than any of the other signs and they should be appreciated and encouraged.

 

9 The Year of the BodyBuilder Another year celebrating fitness and exercise but with an obsessive compulsive twist to it. This year we celebrate Superman and Charles Atlas and perhaps take time to evaluate whether bigger really is better.

 

10 The Year of the Cock This is the year in which we come to the conclusion that bigger really is better. This is a year for strutting and celebrating. This is the most sensible of the sexual years, Those born under this sign get along well with just about everyone but those born under the signs of the Forgy and the Double Penetration seem to have a particular love for Cocks.

 

11 Year of the Barebacker. This is perhaps the most dangerous of the years. This is the year when trouble could be waiting right around the corner. This is the part of the cycle when one needs to carefully commit to a healthy life or be prepared to face the consequences.

 

12 Year of the Dungeon Another dark part of the cycle but with a much more playful edge to it. Another cycle part for exploring limits and discovering secrets that perhaps we dont even tell ourselves.

 

This was a late night flight of fancy. Feel free to comment and to add suggestions about what needs to be added and what needs to be taken out. I am now considering subdividing these down to 3 Signs of Life Style 3 Signs of Sexual Exploration and 3 Signs of Personal Choice and 3 Signs of Morphology.

 

I think I have way to much time on my hands and no I am not about stereotyping anyone, any more than astrologist are stereotyping someone by saying they are a typical Leo.

 

By the way Passed on Year of the Virgin, Year of the AF boy, Year of the Daddy; Year of WaterSports; Year of the Dildo;

[doitb4ugo]

I'll try to think of something clever...not always easy

 

Very enjoyable post PK..I will need to put on my thinking cap to add or realign your years...I would like to see a year of the Cum Pig Bottom but realize that many would avoid this year at all costs....We also are in love with Year of the Cock guys....I think that Year of the Cock would somehow apply to all our desires.

[Guest OCBeachbody]

Interesting.... if your basing on Chinese astrology, definately don't forget to add the elements and yin yang signs....

 

Earth = Yellow = Mellow

Fire =Red = Sassy

Water = Blue = Emo

Wood = Green = Eco-friendly

Metal = Black = Bitchy

 

Yang = Masculine = Butch

Yin = Feminine = Fem

 

lol..then you could have Year of the Butch Sassy Twink