Any escorts on the West Coast Fart a lot?

[imm0rtaldownfalll]

100% serious I got the weirdest fetish I can bust a nut just from being farted on after 5-10 good farts.

 

I'm 25yo, white, from Philly and I will be traveling to Los Angeles, San Diego, Phoenix and Vegas this December, are their any escorts out there who rip a lot of farts?

 

I just want to lay down and whenever you need to fart you rip right in my face while I jerk off thats is it, nothing else.

 

Any escort got major farts? Please let me know! You can email me directly at:

m k s h i n n o k 2 @ g ma i l . c o m (remove spaces)

 

 

fartarific!

[Guest zipperzone]

You could probably feed your fetish with almost any escort you choose. Simply hire them for an overnight, feed then with food known to have gaseous effects and then wait an hour or two. The results may surprise even you!

[imm0rtaldownfalll]

lol that would be true but im only 25yo i cant afford an overnight. plus theres no telling what kind of farts i would get. i love big loud and long farts and who knows what happens if i pay for an overnight and get only silent ones! that wouldnt be good.

[gp0560]

Surrogate

 

As the New Yorker used to say: Quote Without Comment

 

http://www.cakefarts.com/

[samhexum]

West Village residents are kicking up a stink over a “serial farter” who’s polluting the neighborhood.

 

Earlier this year, a local blog posted, “It’s happened thrice, so it can’t be a coincidence: There’s some guy who I believe is playing a fart sound as he passes people as some sort of social experiment. I think it’s always the same . . . fart.”

 

The sleuth posted, “Every time . . . while I was talking to a friend . . . we just get interrupted by this fart that leaves us silent and staring. He plays it as he passes and never looks back, acts like nothing happened. Guy is white, college age, very straight-laced looking.”

 

The not-so-silent-but-deadly dude went quiet for a while, but one area insider told us on Tuesday, “My wife and I were walking by Washington Square Park, and the guy passed by and just ripped one, and we both started laughing.”

 

The couple deduced from the blast it could not have been human.

 

“The dude had a backpack,” said the source, wondering if it housed a flatulence-simulating device.

 

The source snapped a picture of the prankster — a hipster in shades, shorts, a short-sleeved button-down shirt, running shoes and a gray backpack.

 

Citizens beware.