No Show Clients

[Guest jay1jay]

I'm not sure if this has been covered before but if it has forgive me.

When a fellow escort makes a date with a client and the escort fails to show up, there's an outlet for them to voice their disappointment typically in the form of a review (hopefully not 2 years after the fact .) But what happens when the tables are turned and its the escort that's "stood up" by the client? I'm just curious how you guys deal with it...do you try to contact the no show client and lecture him about the value of ones time? Or do you just simple write it off as a bad experience and move on? Inquiring minds want to know. -Jay

[josephga]

I ban clients that don't show for massages. I had a guy call last week wanting a massage i said sorry can't help you, you didn't show up for an appointment you had 4 months ago. some people like to have fun and will call people up to book knowing they won't show.

[Kevin Slater]

it comes with the territory

 

Unfortunately, some guys do get off on wasting our time. They book appointments and don't show and then try to book another gig a few weeks later. Or the number that sends endless text messages (but never manages to answer when you call) will play the same game with another escort bud of mine the next weekend. Sometimes they wait a year before coming back around, but their game never changes.

 

I keep a list of these problematic numbers just so as to save myself time when I end up back on their radar. Occasionally a friend will check a number against my list and sure enough, the guy will have stood us both up (despite the fact that my friend and I cannot possibly appeal to the same demographic). The more unusual the request (there's another thread going where someone says he asks to be sent a pic mail of the escort taken that day) the less likely the prospective client is to be legit.

 

I doubt it does much good to lecture these guys as you'd just providing them more j.o. material. I've been accused of being brusque on the phone, and I wish I wouldn't let these bad apples ruin it for everyone else, but that level of patience is beyond me.

 

I swear if it weren't for these few jerkers off the going rates would be lower. As it is, the vast majority of guys who are sincere in their intent to hire end up compensating escorts for the time spent dealing with the fantasy callers as well.

 

Kevin Slater

[Guy Fawkes]

I'm not sure if this has been covered before but if it has forgive me.

When a fellow escort makes a date with a client and the escort fails to show up, there's an outlet for them to voice their disappointment typically in the form of a review (hopefully not 2 years after the fact .) But what happens when the tables are turned and its the escort that's "stood up" by the client? I'm just curious how you guys deal with it...do you try to contact the no show client and lecture him about the value of ones time? Or do you just simple write it off as a bad experience and move on? Inquiring minds want to know. -Jay

 

http://www.daddysreviews.com/faq.php?mod=submit

 

I made a date with an escort and he never showed up. How do I let people know he is unreliable?

In general we look at these on a case-by-case basis. In general we "Hold" these type of reviews because if is very difficult to verify this type of situation.

[Guest Rusty_McMann]

I think calling them "fantasy callers" is very generous. While I often say that most of my clients treat me better than most of the guys I meet out in bars or (most certainly) on the internet, I do get a fair number of chain-yankers and flat-out hate mail.

 

Last week some guy sent me a message on Adam4Adam asking me to call him because for some reason he couldn't call out. When I called it was one of those prank reject numbers "this is a number for someone who didn't want to give you his real number." He then proceeded to give my number to every guy he met on A4A, resulting in a dozen calls from guys who thought they were going to get... well I don't know who for I don't know what. I finally had to turn off my phone.

 

Clearly there's some psychological thrill in teasing hookers. Or maybe it's some kind of arrested development (the old "prince albert in a can" trick with pubic hair). Yes, it comes with the territory, but if I had a nickel for every time I showed up at a hotel only to find the room number doesn't exist... well I'd have a couple more dollars than I have now.

 

PS. I no longer go to a hotel room unless I can call the client myself and speak to him on the room phone.

[+ David-SF]

welcome hijack

 

Hey there Rusty Welcome to the MC.

more and more escorts are starting to post these days

I hope you will stick around and use the board to gain insight and have fun.

[Kevin Slater]

I no longer go to a hotel room unless I can call the client myself and speak to him on the room phone.

 

If I get a odd vibe, I will do the same. Trouble is, now you're in the position of asking his first and last name (to get past the hotel switchboard). I'm surprised that so far no client has balked about my asking, but it does sound more than a bit prying. It's such a delicate balance between trying to provide a hassle-free, upbeat service while protecting yourself from the time wasters.

 

Kevin Slater

[josephga]

I get at least 2 emails a month that go something like this. So joe i was wondering if you have something on weds for around 2pm for a massage. ill email them back and say sure that day and time is opened just call my number at **** to finalize the appointment.. well that's the last i hear from them.

[Guest Rusty_McMann]

If I get a odd vibe, I will do the same. Trouble is, now you're in the position of asking his first and last name (to get past the hotel switchboard). I'm surprised that so far no client has balked about my asking, but it does sound more than a bit prying. It's such a delicate balance between trying to provide a hassle-free, upbeat service while protecting yourself from the time wasters.

 

Kevin Slater

 

As I learned as a child from the Wicked Witch of the West, these things must be done deeeeeeelicatly...

 

This is a wacky business to say the least, and clients consistently surprize me. I had a client at one of the most high-end casinos here in vegas refuse to give me his last name so I could confirm thru the room, even after I explained how many times I ended up knocking on the door to an empty room. It was a slow night so I agreed to meet him in the lobby. Not only did he show up, but we had a GREAT time, and he tipped me handsomely.

 

So you never fuckin know. But most guys who are playing pranks will hang up when you ask for their name to confirm. Or say Jones.

[jackcali]

Well, I would never give out my last name so you could get through the hotel switchboard, and I imagine clients who are closeted or married or have some sort of public profile (a politician?) would either. It's just way outside my zone of discretion.

 

Maybe things are different in Vegas, but as I recently read somewhere, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas . . . until some idiot posts the pictures on Facebook.

[Guest jay1jay]

I swear if it weren't for these few jerkers off the going rates would be lower. As it is, the vast majority of guys who are sincere in their intent to hire end up compensating escorts for the time spent dealing with the fantasy callers as well.

 

Kevin Slater

 

Interesting logic. It reminds me of what happens in retail stores and how they deal with shoplifters, they eventually end up passing their loss of revenue to the paying customers. Just not sure how clients would react to this though.

 

So then the highlights are:

-deal with it, it comes with the territory

-keep a list of problematic callers/contacts

-black list individuals that routinely set up appts and pull a no show

-if you're friendly with local escorts, exchange/cross reference problematic

callers/contacts

All very good pieces of advice.

[+ newatthis]

escorts and clients have similar concerns

 

I'm struck by how similar the concerns (and bad experiences) of escorts and clients are on some of these issues. The nature of these encounters --their questionable legal status, the emotional ambiguity, the need for discretion on one or both sides -- makes their success highly dependent on mutual trust.

 

From the client side, having a conversation with a potential hire is key for me -- tone of voice often conveys how professional and at ease a person is. And sometimes when a newbie sounds ill at ease, I discover that he's worried that I'm a flake. Sharing my similar concern puts us both at ease.

[Romann]

It's the cost of doing business in this profession. I have found that it's easier to write it off, move forward and not look back. All of us have broken appointments or been late at some point in our life both personal and professional. It happens. That said, it's frustrating but again, it's the cost of doing business from time to time.

 

I try and put a positive spin on it... I look at how many appointments were completed versus how many didn't and that makes the one blip on the radar better.

 

I'm not sure if this has been covered before but if it has forgive me.

When a fellow escort makes a date with a client and the escort fails to show up, there's an outlet for them to voice their disappointment typically in the form of a review (hopefully not 2 years after the fact .) But what happens when the tables are turned and its the escort that's "stood up" by the client? I'm just curious how you guys deal with it...do you try to contact the no show client and lecture him about the value of ones time? Or do you just simple write it off as a bad experience and move on? Inquiring minds want to know. -Jay

[Romann]

Welcome to the forum.

 

I think calling them "fantasy callers" is very generous. While I often say that most of my clients treat me better than most of the guys I meet out in bars or (most certainly) on the internet, I do get a fair number of chain-yankers and flat-out hate mail.

 

Last week some guy sent me a message on Adam4Adam asking me to call him because for some reason he couldn't call out. When I called it was one of those prank reject numbers "this is a number for someone who didn't want to give you his real number." He then proceeded to give my number to every guy he met on A4A, resulting in a dozen calls from guys who thought they were going to get... well I don't know who for I don't know what. I finally had to turn off my phone.

 

Clearly there's some psychological thrill in teasing hookers. Or maybe it's some kind of arrested development (the old "prince albert in a can" trick with pubic hair). Yes, it comes with the territory, but if I had a nickel for every time I showed up at a hotel only to find the room number doesn't exist... well I'd have a couple more dollars than I have now.

 

PS. I no longer go to a hotel room unless I can call the client myself and speak to him on the room phone.

[Romann]

Communication is key and beneficial to all parties involved. While initial email exchanges are nice where I would say a good chunk of details are revealed and agreed upon, backing that up with phone conversation has always been a preference of mine. You can learn a lot by speaking with someone and hearing their logic, words they use, tone and emotion - all very helpful and makes for a more relaxing initial visit. Now, some clients and escorts don't like that so it really comes down to KYC (Know Your Client) and respond accordingly.

 

I have found that most of my clients, past current and potential have always appreciated phone conversation even when an appointment isn't being made but rather to catch up with one another and enjoy the conversation.

 

I'm struck by how similar the concerns (and bad experiences) of escorts and clients are on some of these issues. The nature of these encounters --their questionable legal status, the emotional ambiguity, the need for discretion on one or both sides -- makes their success highly dependent on mutual trust.

 

From the client side, having a conversation with a potential hire is key for me -- tone of voice often conveys how professional and at ease a person is. And sometimes when a newbie sounds ill at ease, I discover that he's worried that I'm a flake. Sharing my similar concern puts us both at ease.

[Guest endoman31]

I am a buyer

 

While in Chicago, after arranging by Email, I contacted my guy, gave him the room number and told him I would leave the door ajar. He showed, very cute, very young, very nice.

I had not thought about all the problems involved.

 

Next time I was to be in Chicago he had disappeared off the map. I lost out.

[devonhunter]

i think romann may very well be a hero in our field... your profiles are consistent on the escorting sites, your reviewers are too, and you come across as pretty fucking incredible. i wanna be you when i grow up.

 

props/finger snaps/knuckle bumps/applause

 

devon

[Guest Musclestudoh]

I couldn't agree more! I will add my two cents and Roman...looks like we will share the "soap box" again.

 

Life happens and it's all about communication and handling yourself professionally. I have found that most clients are respectful and will communicate with as much notice if they have to cancel or reschedule.

 

I had more "no shows" when starting out a few years ago and now I rarely have any. I attribute that to how I have learned to handle my initial communication and follow-up. If the appt. is a few days away confirm a day or so before and ensure that you confirm again a few hours before so that you can plan accordingly. The more you follow-up the better prepared you will be to adapt and schedule accordingly.

 

You will find if you effectively communicate you will be taken seriously. You can usually gauge a clients seriousness for a session by how they communicate beforehand. Knowing how to "read between the lines" can help as well. Serious appts. will come through and those that are inquiring will be just that....

You can't eliminate the risk but you CAN minimize your losses.

 

It's the cost of doing business in this profession. I have found that it's easier to write it off, move forward and not look back. All of us have broken appointments or been late at some point in our life both personal and professional. It happens. That said, it's frustrating but again, it's the cost of doing business from time to time.

 

I try and put a positive spin on it... I look at how many appointments were completed versus how many didn't and that makes the one blip on the radar better.

[Guest RianB]

Unfortunately, some guys do get off on wasting our time. They book appointments and don't show and then try to book another gig a few weeks later.

 

I know this is an old one...but speaking of which, and this may help others in the Dallas area, is a guy who had booked me and didnt confirm when the time came. Been calling me on and off for months now. The number is saved, I already know who it is. But then I picked up last weekend and told him off for calling me when he and I know he's full of it. Then I got a couple text afterwards which really let me know he's got some screws loose.

 

See, Im a nice person. Sometimes too nice for my own good LOL. But at the same time I know when dealing in a business setting I have to be a bit more real about things. There's times when I have to tell prospects to stop texting/chatting and make up their mind or dont waste my time LOL. What really irks me is people who call when they know they have to go someplace in 1 hour! I told someone the other day, why the hell would you call me to meet at 6 if you have to be someplace at 630? At that point he yielded and gave me time to reach the destination!

 

I'm still nice though, theres some people who are for real and those are the ones who find out what Im all about.....

[Steven_Draker]

May I add one more point: NEVER schedule an appointment with someone who is calling you from a blocked/withheld/private number and claims that he has seen you on Daddy's. It's certainly a flake. I hope this helps.

 

Cheers,

[Guest timgetrum]

Building integrity between the two parties is very important. Emails and phone calls are helpful. Those service-providers on here, who have favorable reviews, have those to help establish their integrity. It can be more difficult for clients, who may be greatly concerned about being discreet, to establish integrity. Is there every any place for a non-refundable fee advance? It seems to me that an advance would help establish integrity from the service-provider's perspective. There are ways to easily send funds anonymously. Once a funds-advance has been made, a service-provider might be more comfortable with an ultimately good client's ideosyncracies about privacy, maybe even taking a dreaded private call? An advance can have the additional benefit to a client in that he would be less concerned that a last minute cancellation/postponement for good reason might erroneously brand him as a flake? I am curious about anyone's experience with advancing funds.

[Romann]

Part of doing business...

 

Good evening Rusty and welcome to the MC. Also, hello fellow Dallas resident!

 

Just like you said, you write it off and my advice is to move forward from the experience because more often than not, no shows happen far less than compared to those who do make good with their appointments.

 

I'm not sure if this has been covered before but if it has forgive me.

When a fellow escort makes a date with a client and the escort fails to show up, there's an outlet for them to voice their disappointment typically in the form of a review (hopefully not 2 years after the fact .) But what happens when the tables are turned and its the escort that's "stood up" by the client? I'm just curious how you guys deal with it...do you try to contact the no show client and lecture him about the value of ones time? Or do you just simple write it off as a bad experience and move on? Inquiring minds want to know. -Jay

[Guest RianB]

May I add one more point: NEVER schedule an appointment with someone who is calling you from a blocked/withheld/private number and claims that he has seen you on Daddy's. It's certainly a flake. I hope this helps.

 

Cheers,[/color]

 

Drake c'mon....I think you and I know people calling from withhelds saying they seen us on a forum are full of it. Lurkers! I'd tell him, "Ok if you seen me on daddy's, you know Im forreal and well-known, what are YOU hiding?" There's no excuse to be calling private unless you're hiding something, thats why its 'private'. I've had extremely discreet people call me from visible home phones and cell phones so thats no excuse either.

 

Once a funds-advance has been made, a service-provider might be more comfortable with an ultimately good client's ideosyncracies about privacy, maybe even taking a dreaded private call? I am curious about anyone's experience with advancing funds.

 

Theres more reasons than not showing up to an appt for not taking private numbers. My main thing is saftey in case something crazy happens, how will one be able to trace a number? It dont even need to be that serious. Sometimes I need to call a client before Im on my way or to confirm. And if the person calls and I miss it...unless I see it within 10 minutes or they leave a message saying to call him then I wont. When someone is really that concerned about having their number show I have suggested to go down to 7 eleven and get a prepaid phone with a number showing.

 

As far as advanced payments, it could help but in the U.S. so many people are concerned about being scammed that most are reluctant to pay before even seeing the person. Long distance deals I would ask, but as far as everyday stuff...If they dont call by a certain time I dont waste my time.