Matthew from the Gaiety (Shawn)

[Guest Halton]

I'll be in NY soon and would love to see Matthew (aka Shawn) from the Gaiety. He's a real sweet guy and hope he's doing well. Anyone have a contact number or an update?

[+ bigjoey]

matthew has retired from the gaiety. he has gone back to school and doing well. he is now more relaxed as the gaiety was stressful for him. while he sees a few gentlemen(myself included) from time to time, he is not seeking additional "work." things seem to be working out for him. some of the guys at the gaiety manage to "move on" and get a real life; it appears that matthew will be one of these. he takes school seriously and is giving it all he has. he is excited about all he is learning and is an intelligent person. i believe he'll do fine.

 

the first time i hired him at the gaiety, i was impressed by the pile of books he had just bought and was reading. it was good literature, not trash. i bought him a few books the next day that i thought he would enjoy. when i saw him next, he had read them and we had a great discussion. many of the guys at the gaiety are not the brighest bulbs, matthew was a delightful exception.

 

he is keeping more regular hours than his gaiety work allowed. he looks better than ever reflecting his positive change of mind. we should all be glad for him.:-)

[Guest Halton]

I'm really thrilled to hear that about him. When I first met him, I was stunned at how honest and real he was. He's a quality guy. Tell him his friend from LA say hi and best of luck.

[Guest SPECIAL]

isn't it so sad that such a quality person as Matthew has left the scene? Does that mean that Big Joey has him all to himself?? I must meet you Big Joey. You seem to be a man of distinction and character. Also a fine judge of human behavior. Do you still go to the gaiety?? I am usually there on Fridays and Saturdays about 8pm by the telephone.. Would love to meet you and talk about the "boys". Let me know.

[+ bigjoey]

i get to new york about 3 or 4 times a year. ny observer knows me and he can introduce us. in fact, he introduced me to matthew. i don't have him all alone; it's just that he has developed real relationships with some of us. we tend to enjoy each others company; if you read some of my past posts, i tend to see a few very special men on a long term basis and companionship is more important than the sex.

 

the gaiety has some quality dancers. you just need to pick them out; yes, you'll get a few bad ones along the way but the winners have far outweighed the losers. for example, six years later i am still seeing jon ramsey that i met at the gaiety. another quality man(he's still "working").

 

pick carefully.

[Guest paulnyc]

Real relationships? You must be kidding. One doesn't have to pay to have a real relationship. These are business deals. Why do we keep fooling ourselves otherwise? Do you think these guys would spend their time with us if we were not paying them? Let's get real here.

[+ bigjoey]

"real relationships" are rare but do happen. i still have relationships with 3 former gaiety dancers, one of which is just coming to visit me for a week next week(no payment for time). this particular ex-dancer has told me i am his only real friend. i know his mother and talk to her from time to time; he has come here with his father for the weekend; etc. i helped him out at a time when he was hitting a low point in his life and we have become real friends. i first hired him at the gaiety about 6 or 7 years ago after the monday 1:00 show and it turned out i was his first gay sexual experience!!! an unusual bonding experience. i mention this as another example to show that it does happen.

 

will i still be friends with matthew 6 or 7 years from now,too? i think there is a good chance. there is a remarkable change in him since he has left the gaiety scene. he is very relaxed and comfortable with himself. he is very focused on school and what could be an exciting career. a few weeks ago, he was here and spent a great deal of time on homework. there is a real honesty between us. a true relationship takes time to build and we see each other enough (we only do weekends) that the time has been there.

 

if you read my past posts you will see i advocate treating the escorts with respect and decency( not like a piece of meat). also, i tend to hire an escort for a weekend or do traveling. when you spend a long time with someone, you get to know each other better and if a real relationship will develop it will be in that kind of setting. alot of these guys are lonely and isolated from their families and looking for a connection, too. it can be a two way street. they respond if treated decently. for the person who hires for the hour and a different escort all the time, a relationship will never develop.

 

i have not ended up with a relationship with everyone. for example, the famous kirk and i had a couple of weekends together and nunerous shorter sessions in new york. while a am crazy about that body and dick and the sex is good, there is no relationship outside of business; there never will be one with him. surprisingly enough, there is a kind of honesty between us from the long standing business relationship but certainly not a personal relationship.

 

pick carefully; there are some real genuine nice guys out there but it is not common. a true relationship can satisfy needs on both sides and be good for everyone. am i unusual, maybe so; however, i think that others must have had similar experiences with escorts. good hunting.

[ready4boi]

:o

 

Are you kidding?? To think you have any real relationship with these boys you are paying is absolutely ridiculous not to mention dellusional. You have the right to believe what you want Joey but I'd re-evaluate the situations you've created for yourself. I also recall rumor had it that this particular dancer you befriended walked out on Denise after she reprimanded him about an alleged drug problem. I don't care what the real story is with any of these dancers, but most of them are not exactly ordinary people you can become real friends with. I don't know these ex-dancers you have taken a personal interest, but stop helping them and supporting their habits by giving them money and then see how quickly the "friendship" dissolves. Good luck.

[+ bigjoey]

each escort needs to be judged on his own.for some escorts, i do not have personal relationships outside of the business relationship of spending some time together. for example, in addition to the above mentioned kirk, whenever i am in dallas, i see travis wade (O.K., i'm a size queen); in california, scott stanton (yes, he is that big!!!);etc. in addition to these regular guys, i've seen some that are alright but i would not want to see again and then there have been some that are bad.

 

all i am saying is there are some gems that are exceptions to the general rule. the ex-escorts that i see on a friendly basis are not being paid by me and we do not have sex; we just share time and companionship together. these ex-escorts have not had good family relationships(for the most part) and do not have alot of friends, if any. they are often lonely and like someone who is not judgmental on their past (or present) behavior.perhaps they like being treated decently.

 

will my relationship with matthew turn out to be the same? if you read my post, i express the hope that it would. as i noted, he is much different since he left the gaiety. think if we were on the stage how stressful it is; doing all the private shows (not all of them pleasant) and running back for the final show. it's hard being treated as an object for a week. matthew just had enough. as it so turns out, i hired him the entire weekend before. sunday, we didn't get to sleep until about 4:00 am(we were playing chess!!). so monday would not be too hard on him, i hired him for the privates after 1:00 and 3:30 so he could sleep. i went to his room to wake him before the 6:00 show and he and denise had already gotten into at the 1:00 show over his new look; later in the week they got into it over how he was dressing. he could have had a more graceful exit but didn't.

 

matthew has lots of potential to have a good normal life. as there is still the business aspect to our relationship, i do pay him. time will tell what happens to that relationship. my gut feeling (crazy or not) is that there is a good, real personal relationship growing.

[marc anthony]

Both of you, ready4boi and bigjoey, are correct. Ready4boi is correct that the vast majority of escort-client relationships are strictly business in the escort's mind, though the client may be deluded into thinking otherwise. In some cases, the client can become an enabler of the escort's "bad habits". However, bigjoey is also correct that occasionally a different type of relationship can develop. Bottom line is that escorts are human beings as well, and they have emotional needs to be filled. Sometimes the right client comes along to fulfill those needs and next thing you know, a "real" relationship develops. I have hired very many escorts, some of whom are strictly business and one-timers. Some are repeaters and I wish our relationship were more, but I know that the escort views me as only a client. But I do have two relationships that began as an escort-client relationship and is now much more. The amazing thing (or is it unfortunate) is that the more a relationship becomes "real", the less sex becomes a part of it!

[Guest SPECIAL]

I am extremely personable and relationship oriented. I am great company, witty and fun to be with. Am also quite hot. Would big Joey like to hire me for the weekend? Who knows it could be the start of another relationship for him>