Confidentiality Concerns

[Jeff]

I read that somewhere that escorts protect themselves in different ways when meeting a new client, which is totally understandable... some maybe tell a roommate, or has someone wait outside. But one said he gives the phone # and e-mail to another escort friend - which brings me to this question: How confidential is "confidential"? If one escort knows who I am, do several others?

 

And is there any code with respect to even talking about specific clients afterwards? I mean - there's a double standard here. Clients talk about escorts, but do escorts talk about clients? Or since clients are paying for discretion - what is acceptable (if anything) for an escort to share about me with others? And what, practically speaking, commonly happens?

 

What scares me is the whole joke of someone telling someone else something "confidentially"... then that person tells someone else, or a group, but "in confidence"... and one day you're sitting there being told something in "confidence" that you had started, but the details have altered along the way.

 

I know escorts need to protect themselves too - so what is usually the common practice? How do I feel comfortable about discretion too, even from other escorts, both in preparation for a meeting as well as after the fact?

 

Thank you for sharing!!

[seaboy4hire]

Jeff you have some valid concerns there and deserve a good discussion. Speaking for myself I never share details on what goes on between closed doors with anyone end of story. As for letting someone know where I am at and what time I will be done yes I do let the bf know where I will be at and about what time I will be done. Before I get to where ever I am meeting up with someone I give him a call or text and afterwards I give him a call to let him know that I am safe. He is the only one that I let know any contact info just in case G-d forbid anything bad were to happen. We've been together for almost 10 years so obviously I trust him very much and know he wouldn't miss use any contact info I give him. As for escorts letting other escorts know where they are at they might do so because friends and family might not know what they do on the side or for a full time living and they probably have enough trust between each other to pass this contact info along for those just in case situations. I think that and hope that if clients are seeing someone new ya'll do the same. I don't think that one can be too safe when it comes to meeting someone new.

 

Hugs,

Greg

seaboy4hire@yahoo.com

http://seaboy4hire.tripod.com http://www.daddysreviews.com/newest.php?who=greg_seattle

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[Guest countryboywny]

Confidentiality is a leap of faith for all parties involved. The risks are obvious, but I think good escorts who are in it for the long haul recognize that any breach of that confidentiality could ruin their careers.

 

 

 

 

 

It's OK to say Merry Christmas to me!

[Guest TorontoJared]

Confidentiality is extremely important. One of the expectations is that an escort will be discreet and what happens between the two will never be disclosed to other parties.

 

As to how I protect myself, a friend of mine has a key to my apartment. When I leave to see someone I leave a sealed envelope in a specific place with the information of where I am and the phone number, etc of the person I have left to see. On the outside of the envelope I write the time that I am expecting to be back. The place where I put the envelope isn't in plain sight. Actually, one wouldn't find the envelope unless you knew where to look. She and I are in pretty close contact so if I am going away on a trip she would know what day I was due back. If she hadn't heard from me she could go and look in the spot where we've agreed to keep the envelopes. If the envelope said "Sunday by midnight" and it was Monday evening and she'd had no word from me that I was stuck in transit/had extended the trip/etc and I wasn't answering my phone, she would only then open the envelope. Whenever I return from seeing a client the first thing that I do is retreive the envelope from its hiding place and destroy it. She is one of my best friends and someone that I trust completely. Thus far she hasn't had to open an envelope. I thought that it was a good have someone be able to know where I was but also keep the clent's confidentiality. The above only lets one person be party to the client's contact information only if I have not returned.

[+ Lucky]

Jared, the more of your posts I read, the more I like you. You seem like a pretty savvy guy!

[Guest josephga]

i agree jared thats a very good idea. i take all my massage clients here at my home. my number one rule is a unblocked phone number. that way theres a record with the cell phone company in case something happens too me. i believe trust works both ways. you are coming in to my home if you cant trust that i will be discreet with the number then you are someone that cant be trusted in my home.. i make no exeption with this rule....

[Guest zipperzone]

>Confidentiality is a leap of faith for all parties involved.

>The risks are obvious, but I think good escorts who are in it

>for the long haul recognize that any breach of that

>confidentiality could ruin their careers.

 

Like with BN and Mr Lott? or is that Trent?

[Epigonos]

I have said it before and I will say it again. If I, as a client, cannot afford to have the fact that I hire escorts made public then I damn well better NOT be doing it. In the simplest terms possible; if exposure would ruin my life I would be a fool to do so. I agree that confidentiality is extremely important BUT as a client I have no way of guaranteeing that it will be honored. With this in mind I hope for the best and am prepared to face the worst.

[2hard2tame]

well, to put things bluntly, I dont bother. I can handle my own and have no worries about such. I am a big boy, and it would be foolish to assault me or attempt to force me to do anything I dont want.

 

I refuse to be a sheep, and am quite able to defend myself.

 

Therefore, there was no need for anyone to know any of my business.

That about as confidential as you can get:)

[MIKEY08]

Hi to all,

 

Well, this is the reality: When one goes to a client's location or when one has a client over to one's own location, there are always risks. No safeguard can be one hundred percent, not even the bodyguard idea referred to in Kenny's posting in response to David's message in this same category.

 

I honestly do not believe that clients, especially married clients, would want to hire me unless they know me to be one hundred percent discreet and keep all personal identifying info in strict confidence.

 

The other complicating factor is law enforcement in my area, in Southeast Florida: About sixty to seventy percent of those in the local county police departments are involved with transactions with escorts, including gay male escorts. Plus, the above does not even take into account those in public service employment in the public sector; and those in executive positions, often high-level, for major corporations.

 

Clients may only be known by escorts on a first-name basis, but that does not mean that they cannot be identified.

 

However, this is not to say that escorts should not do things that make them feel more comfortable and/or safer; and certainly it's not really anyone else's business what is discussed or what info is shared by an escort and his boyfriend/life partner or such.

 

I really cannot picture myself ever actually doing this even if my circumstances really matched those of the contributor of the idea, and, by "this", I mean the leaving of the note in an envelope thing.

Of course, not to sound overly morbid, the note in theory would serve the purpose, if nothing else, of giving a clue to family members as to where I last was (and I'd rather not say more on that: It gives me the willies, so to speak).

 

Anyway, with ten continuous years in the industry as an escort, this is what I recommend: Prayer. It may not help, but it certainly cannot hurt.

 

The bottom line is this: If we focused on these risks in our day to day lives, we would unlikely be able to be successful as escorts: In other words, our nerves would get the best of us.

 

There are many fellow escorts that I know of through their ads and such who have one or more of the following three traits: Very young or young-looking ("twinks" or "twink"-like lads); emotionally immaturity or passivity in nature; no or insufficient self-defense skills and/or physically slight or lightweight builds. The above traits certainly make the risks faced by all escorts even more challenging. When I began as an escort, I used to think that the only thing I had to be concerned with was not taking certain valuables inside to the client's location or leaving anything valuable or of a personal nature at the client's location; and of course health-related concerns were even then of concern. I'd like to think that I am more alert and aware of potential safety dangers today, yet I am not infallible and cetainly in the context of erotic relations, there is easily room for distraction.

 

There is definitely as strong money incentive for keeping our mouths shuts: If we lose clients, especially regulars, and/or potential clients as a result of lack of discretion or failure to keep private info confidential, we lose or at least risking losing this: C-A-S-H, cash. We always have some polyanna out there telling us of the good life, the American dream, etc., but the reality is most of us are just barely getting by.

 

MIKEY