Should Clients Disclose a Disability?

[Guest ncm2169]

I'm aware of a situation involving a "possibly-to-be-client" who uses a wheelchair due to a spinal cord injury. He's been in preliminary contact with a few escorts (nothing serious yet), but so far hasn't disclosed his disability.

 

How should such clients handle these situations when approaching an escort? I'm interested in hearing from both escorts and clients. :o

[jasoncarter_dfw]

I have seen a couple of clients with disabilities, and both times we had a great time together. I wouldn't be phased if a client did not disclose his disability to me. However, I believe it would be nice to mention it to the escort. That way the escort can be prepared to make the session as pleasurable as possible for both parties. Hope that helps!

 

- Jason Carter - Dallas, TX

- http://www.sexyjasoncarter.com

- [email protected]

 

 

>I'm aware of a situation involving a "possibly-to-be-client"

>who uses a wheelchair due to a spinal cord injury. He's been

>in preliminary contact with a few escorts (nothing serious

>yet), but so far hasn't disclosed his disability.

>

>How should such clients handle these situations when

>approaching an escort? I'm interested in hearing from both

>escorts and clients. :o

[Guest jeffOH]

As an escort, I'd prefer to know of a disability in advance. I do have a client who has spina bifida and uses a wheelchair. He's limited as to what he's able to do sexually, but he certainly enjoys himself anyway. Unfortunately, there are some escorts who probably wouldn't agree to see someone with a disability.

 

JEFF

[email protected]

[Guest DevonSFescort]

I'd recommend a client disclose any information that's likely to have a bearing on his physical comfort and/or capabilities during sex. Even if the "disability" amounts to no more than the fact that he's taking medication that makes it very difficult for him to get hard, it's best to let the escort know so he won't be watching the proverbial pot that won't boil and wondering what he's doing wrong. And if, as Jeff mentioned, some escorts won't want to see him, it would be much better to find that out via email in advance of making the appointment than to put himself through the humiliation of the escort's "guess who's coming to dinner?" reaction. But more importantly, it will give the escort he does plan on seeing a chance to get a sense of what he'll be needing to do differently with this particular individual.

 

Of course, if part of your session includes massage, it's all the more important to make the escort/masseur aware of any injuries BEFORE the rubbing begins.

[AaronScottDC]

>How should such clients handle these situations when

>approaching an escort? I'm interested in hearing from both

>escorts and clients. :o

 

I can certainly see why the client may not be all that interested in mentioning his disability to the escort in his initial email inquiry. But, if he finds an escort who he is interested in meeting, then he should definitely discuss the disability in the ensuing email exchanges.

 

As Jason already mentioned, I wouldn't be overly rattled at meeting a client with a disability if they didn't tell me about it ahead of time. But, it is always nice to know some of the important things before meeting face to face. I have a few clients who have some special needs. One has had a stroke, one is on kidney dialysis, a couple have had prostate surgery, a few are taking medication which adversely affects sexual function, and another has diabetes. All of these guys have special needs to which I have to pay attention in order to ensure their full enjoyment. Most, but not all, informed me of these needs before we met. This allowed us to have a better time when we were together.

 

So, if your friend doesn't feel comfortable mentioning his disability during his initial email contacts with escorts, that's cool. But, I would urge him to do so in his follow up email messages when he finds the escort he is looking for. I wish him the best of luck in his new endeavors! :-)

 

 

Aaron Scott DC

http://www.erados.com/AaronScottDC

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/aaronscottdc.html

[OneFinger]

>I have a few clients who have some special needs... and another has diabetes. All of these guys have special needs to which I have to pay attention in order to ensure their full enjoyment.

 

Aaron, I didn't know that diabetes affected sexual function. If you don't mind me asking, what do you do differently with a diabetic?

 

I can understand disclosing other conditons. But I don't understand why an escort should know about diabetes unless it's resulted in the loss of a limb or has affected eyesight.

[AaronScottDC]

>Aaron, I didn't know that diabetes affected sexual function.

>If you don't mind me asking, what do you do differently with a

>diabetic?

>

>I can understand disclosing other conditons. But I don't

>understand why an escort should know about diabetes unless

>it's resulted in the loss of a limb or has affected eyesight.

 

Well, the guy with diabetes claimed that the medication he was on affected his ability to become erect. He said he could still feel many wonderful sensations in his dick and even had orgasms (though he did not ejaculate). So, because of this condition, I needed to treat him a bit differently than I would have otherwise. Maybe the diabetes wasn't the real cause of these issues, but that is what he told me.

 

Aaron Scott DC

http://www.erados.com/AaronScottDC

http://www.male4malescorts.com/reviews/aaronscottdc.html

[VaHawk]

WOW! I loved your reply and agreed with every word of it. I think it would be benefical as you say for the client to disclose that information, but I really love the fact that if they didn't that it doesn't stop you from accomodating and doing your best to please the client. I'm sure it must throw an escort a real curve to find that out only upon first meeting the client. You sound like a very beautiful person.

[giovoni]

It's a legitimate concern for Diabetics... I'm too lazy to type too much tonight so I'll copy and past this little blurb from:

 

http://www.intelihealth.com/IH/ihtIH/WSIHW000/8316/24019/233288.html?d=dmtContent

 

Diabetes And Impotence

Long-standing diabetes often leads to sexual problems. By age 43, about 45 percent of men with type 1 (childhood-onset) diabetes experienced impotence (also known as erectile dysfunction). Men with type 2 (adult-onset) diabetes develop impotence at a similar rate. Some women also report diminished sexual responsiveness, probably due to decreased sensation.

 

Achieving and maintaining an erection is a complex action in which blood circulation, nerves and hormones all play a role. Psychological and emotional factors are also important. Diabetes can affect any or all of these systems. Nerve damage or vascular problems are the usual causes of sexual-performance problems for men. The likelihood of impotence increases when diabetes has been present for a long time, the blood sugar has been poorly controlled, and other types of nerve damage are present. Psychological factors such as anxiety and depression can also cause or contribute to erectile dysfunction, which may be temporary or more long-lasting.

 

The good news is that a number of devices and medications can improve sexual function. Penile implants are one option. Some men with diabetes can get relief for their sexual problems from the drug sildenafil (Viagra), which helps to improve blood flow in the penis.

 

Nerve damage that causes impotence can be prevented, or at least delayed, with good blood glucose control. Smoking also contributes to neuropathies, so smokers should stop. Maintaining normal blood pressure also may be protective.

 

 

Gio in Denver

http://www.angelfire.com/co3/massagebygio

[VaHawk]

Thanks for the info, as it is appreciated.

 

But really, when it gets to the point where I need to get a penile implant to get it up, then I will thank God that the head on the cock can no longer overrule the head on the shoulders!

 

As an escort, have you ever run across anyone with a penile implant, and if so how did you feel/handle it? Of course you don't have to answer such a personal question, but I'm just curious as I have encountered that in the non-escort world.

 

It was a strange scene to say the least. I didn't feel like laughing as it wasn't funny, and I didn't want to scream as it wasn't horrid, but I did find it a total turnoff, and got him off and got out of there as soon as I could. Of course I felt like total crap not returning his calls afterward.

 

What would you do as a professional escort?

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

Vasodilators

 

>But really, when it gets to the point where I need to get a

>penile implant to get it up, then I will thank God that the

>head on the cock can no longer overrule the head on the

>shoulders!

>

>As an escort, have you ever run across anyone with a penile

>implant, and if so how did you feel/handle it? Of course you

>don't have to answer such a personal question, but I'm just

>curious as I have encountered that in the non-escort world.

>

 

I had a next door neighbor, a gay couple in their 40s, when I was in college, who used a penile implant due to a Vietnam War era injury to his pelvic region. I recall asking him once if it was painful and he stated no, he also felt that he had to use such an implant for his partner's sake.

 

I do have a client who uses Trimix for a medical condition; what exactly that medical condition is, I do not know, but he cannot otherwise erect. This gentlemen actually is extraordinarily well hung and I can go down on his and play with his penis and there is "plenty" there to work with, but he cannot get hard and he cannot orgasm. There are porn stars, including some well reviewed, well regarded "total tops" who use this medication both in films and escorting session; personally I do not think taking anything that is not medically indicated is ever a good idea.

 

In San Francisco, I had a client who was legally blind in both eyes. This never prevented my client (or myself for that matter) from enjoying our sessions together. I also have seen a client in a wheel chair in Los Angeles.

 

While I think Jason's stance is highly admirable and will state I would not have a problem with a client with a disability, I believe Aaron and Devon more accurately nailed this position. There are some instances where the information is necessary in advance. It is possible, for example, for someone in a wheel chair to either get fucked or to fuck. It might require some strength on either the part of the client or the escort (or both), some dixterity as well as an ability to create a comfortable situation for both parties.

 

Since ultimately a good experience should be the goal of the escort and the right of the client, any information which would contribute to that end should be provided in advance. While it does not need to provided on the first contact, it should be provided, if appropriate, prior to a meeting. If not appropriate, it need not be disclosed.

[VaHawk]

RE: Vasodilators

 

Great post Franco. I like it when you take the time to fully express yourself in detail, as I understand what you are saying much better than when you shorten your response because of criticism of the length of your posts.

 

Of course, I agree that everything should be stated upfront before meeting so that the escort can provide the client with a great encounter. I also agree with the fact that not everyone in a wheelchair is incapable of "getting it up". It might take more effort and a different approach than usual, but it definitely can be done.

 

As far as penile implants go, I was only looking at it from my one experience with it which was with an older man in the pre-Viagara age. I appreciate you reminding me that a lot of young men find it necessary because of injuries either war related or otherwise. I am so rightly chastised for my oversight.

 

As for me personally, I have never found a man unattractive due to any kind of physical or even mental so-called "handicap". IMO the only people truly handicapped are those who can't see beyond the immediate physical presence.

[swallowU]

I haven't posted much to this Message Center in the past, leaving my 'participation' to the viewing side of the messages.

 

This particular thread is one that I can relate to very much. I don't disclose - mainly because my diability doesn't limit my experience with an escort.

 

I happen to have a colostomy as a result of Crohn's... and several surgeries later, my abdomen is quite scarred up.

 

I (like Rick Munroe) love sucking cock and since I can't do anal (never even had the chance to experience it), I just make sure the escort knows what I am looking for.

 

I would most definitely tell the escort if I ever took a trip and/or arranged for an overnight experience.

 

But most of the escorts that I've hired repeatedly know what I enjoy and haven't even got a clue that I have a colostomy.

 

Just my take on this subject...

 

 

p.s. still need to make it to NYC to attend one of Ricky's cocksucking classes 101....:-)

[OneFinger]

Gio and Aaron,

 

Thanks for the input. Diabetes runs in the family and, thankfully, I've not yet got it. But I had no idea it could affect sexual function.