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Do escorts have real lives?


Orson Kane
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I have had wonderful experiences with escorts and am glad that you guys are there to provide great service. The question I have always had is how escorting affects your real lives in terms of meeting people for real relationships and also maintaining these relationships. Do you tell people on a real date that you are an escort? Do you maintain long-term relationships while escorting? How well do your real partners accept your escorting?? Thanks for any answers here!

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Guest dstud4hire

Hey there...this whole dating thing is def. a bit more of a challenge, esp. here in the Midwest, where guys tend to runa bit more conservative. It's getting to the point that I feel I probably need to date only guys who have done or presently do tis line of work.

 

Because I am open to very few people about this on the local level, I need to be careful about who I tell, hence I would never tell a guy on the 1st date, but would then feel compelled to inform him of such once there was adef. connection between the two.

 

However, just because he does similar work, doesn't always gaurantee acceptance. Just recently dated a former porn actor, who, much to my surprise, had a HUGE problem with me escorting, which really bummed me out for a while, with me thinking that I would never find a match if even a former porn actor couldn't find a level of tolerance for this.

 

So, yes, it's a tough one, but I also know that this has been too long and important of a ride in my life to omit this. I believe in total honesty (well, he doesn't have to know the nitty grity of it all, but you get the idea), so it does make it a bit (ok , a lot) tougher.

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I don't run around with a "Hustler" T-shirt on too often, but it's a poorly kept secret here. I don't think too many people have much to say about it, but I'm mostly a loner anyways.

I had a wonderful relationship that lasted 6 months last year, which is quite a while for me. WE broke up from lack of sex, and it did not come out until maybe a month ago that he thought I didn't see a difference between sex and (ok time to sound silly) making love. We had a little talk and I told him what I though tabout that. ;-) However he has a new beau now.

Recently many of my firends paired off and I got a little lonely and met a great guy. However, he's very straight-laced and seems like he would be very sensitive. So, rather than get a reputation as a heartbreaker I distanced myself a little, and now have a hot new friend.

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Real Lives.... what constitutes a 'real life'?

Dating is definatly a different scene when you're an escort.

When I meet someone I'm interested in, the farthest thing from my mind(well no the FARTHEST) is sex... I have sex all the time, what I'm more interested in is the cuddling on the couch watching a movie, the saturday morning rituals that couples get into, the always prepared shoulder to lean on/complain too....

Recently I was contacted by another local escort(not reviewed) who is physically exactly my type, and he wanted to hook up for some playtime. I explained to him that sex is the last thing on my mind at the end of the day, but if he'd be into hooking up to meet over coffee (sooooo Vancouver) or dinner or sumpthin, I'd be game...

We still have not met.

I've dated periodically since I started escorting, and have always been very upfront about what I do. So it's a non issue for me, and I figure, if they are going to have a problem with it, let's figure that out now as opposed to later.

Besides, I'm pretty visable and open about my chosen profession, so most people already know what I do for a living, without me having to 'come clean'. And if they haven't already seen me all over the web, chances are they have been told by one of thier friends. Gay men do like to gossip...(did you know that guy is a prosi??...etc)

Otherwise, normality in my life?? I have lot's of friends, a daughter, in another city whom I visit frequently, and a busy sociallife... so it's about as normal as anyone elses life I guess... unless you are including the fact that I have sex with men for a living: )

Matt(normal in a weird kinda way)(8 year old japanese girl trapped in a 32 year old mans body... hello kitty)

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Guest Brian_Raleigh_

Well speaking for myself, I have been involved with another escort on and off for about 2 years now. I would say at times, even this creates problems, because one of you is always gone , etc. I agree with what has been said above. My friend and I spend alot of time doing things together outside of the bedroom. We go to movies when we can, parks, trips etc. It is not about sex , trust me :) Right now we are in one of those off periods, due to the fact that our schedules are not meshing. And as for people not involved with escorting, I do find it hard to tell someone I am interested in what I do. I am in nc , and it seems everyone knows everyone, and your business gets out so fast. I know I have rambled, so i will shut up now

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Real Life - Only Better Lit

 

This is interesting.

 

One of the more common questions I am asked revolve around dating or a fascination with escorting, the belief it has a certain element of glamour. As some of you may recall, I have been seeing a porn actor. When clients and prospects have learned this, they assume we have nonstop orgies, know all the other porn stars and escorts, always hang out with them, and are Melrose Place, most day time soap operas and a live-sex web cam operation all rolled up into one.

 

The reality? Some days, we often only get to speak on line, rushed cell phone conversations while I am working out or he is, while he is in his car or I am. When we do see each other, it is often late at night, we eat simple take-out meals in bed while we watch DVDs and cuddle.

 

I can fully understand Matt's take. Sometimes, it is nice just to have a conversation or relax; like anyone else, we do not want take work "home" with us and for an escort or a porn star, sex is part of what we do all day, either talking about having it, planning to have it, trying to have it or actually having it.

 

Sex is important to me but I can also understand that someone would want me to know the distinction between sex and making love. Would want, as well, for me to understand that sometimes men just want to get laid, even by their boyfriends, and they do not really want to make love but just want to get off with someone they care for.

 

As for dating, I think the other gentlemen have expressed my sentiments well and I have expressed them elsewhere. It is not easy and it is not simple, even with others in the sex work industry. In fact, it is a lot like it would be for any of you reading this, no matter what your profession.

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Gabe,

 

I hired you when you were in Philadelphia recently and you mentioned

the dating problem. It is a big problem for an escort, especially in a place like St. Louis. I have known escorts who have established some

solid relationships, despite their profession. They did go through a lot before finding the right person. You are a great guy, very good

looking and personable. Keep trying. I notice that you have a lot of tvaveling on your schedule, hope you make it back here. (This is not a paid commercial: I feel like the Dell dude on TV). ;)

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Guest Thunderbuns

(This is not a paid commercial: I feel like the Dell

>dude on TV). ;)

 

He's kina hot - No?

 

Thunderbuns

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Guest Thunderbuns

>I love that guy. A bit lanky, but so cute. I'd hire him in

>a second if he "modeled" on a broader spectrum.

 

And there's something about his voice that gets me all hot and bothered. And when he's is shot from certain angles he looks like his legs are slightly bowed - another turn-on!

 

Thunderbuns

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Guest ptownmatt

Yes they do and when I was younger had relationships with 2. It didn't bother me in the least for a couple of reasons. 1. with a few exceptions(an occasional overnight) they were always there to wake up with. (I love to make love in the morning) 2. They were Big boys and consequently most of their clients wanted them to top, whereas in our relationships I usually topped. (The second would only top for clients.) Neither relationship ended because of their occupation or any reason remotely related to it. I understand it is difficult for some people to accept, but there is much more to a relationship than the sex and if it is built on those than it can work.

Just for the curious I will say that #1 ended when I moved to the North for employment and #2 ended because they could not deal with me having friends outside of our relationship and were constantly worried that I was having sex with other people. (kind of a twist wouldn't you say)

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Guest jeffOH

This is a hot topic with my friends and I. I've been "mostly single" for the past 11 years that I've been escorting. I briefly dated another escort 10 years my junior a few years ago. I last had "free sex" as I call it, September 11. I really was in no mood to go out on this date, but he was a hot 19 year-old deaf boy. We were to meet at the Coffee Table. I'd been devasted by the day's events.

 

We wrote back and forth on a tablet I'd brought. He's not very good at reading lips. He too was quite upset about the day's events. I could see it in his eyes. Needless to say, we had some of the hottest fucking. Taking turns on each other.

 

So, most of the sex I have is either with my clients or with another escort. I think I'm wierd when most of the time my mind is simply elsewhere. I do sex and intimacy for a living. I understand it inside and out. I'm turned on in an entirely different way now than 20 years ago. I suppose I do have passionate relationships with my friends.

 

I've never really been able to have a real friendship with anyone I ever dated. We'd have great sex, look fabulous together and wear the same size clothes. That was it, no interesting conversations that I can recall to this day. Now, I'd much rather my mate to be interesting. To be able to wander around in conversation is a big plus for me.

 

Franco must be on my mind. I've started to ramble. ;-)

 

Life is good. I've started a new business, I'm in semi-retirement from escorting and my Mom with whom I hadn't spoken to or seen for 6 years sent me a card apologizing for all the pain that she knew she had caused me over the years. I was STUNNED! Really, I kept looking at it. I was feeling so many things. I was numb. We talked and the two of us are getting together for dinner. I have much for which to be grateful.

 

So, you asked and there it is. A thumb-nail sketch of this hooker's "real life".

 

JEFF

[email protected]:)

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Guest dstud4hire

wow, thx guys for the sweet compliments! I really need to chk these threads a bit more often than I do......anyway, ya'll brogtht a smile to my face! Take care.....still searching, but will eventually find the right match..... :)

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Guest TopUNowD1

Well mate, I've only been doing this for about 9 months now, and I've found that issue to pose some unique problems... to say the least. *grin*

[/p]

I've been "dating" the same bloke for the past 9 months too... give or take a week or two. He was one of my first clients and against all logic our relationship just kind of evolved into something different.

[/p]

Obviously we're not exclusive, although he tells me that he's not interested in other blokes. *don't worry, I didn't just fall off the turnip wagon* We see each other between 1-3 times a week, usually with him stayin' the night at my house. When I have an appointment we don't see each other that night.

[/p]

If someone had asked me, 10 months ago, do I think a situation like this could work, I would've said no way on earth. And firmly believed it. I can't explain how we've made it work but it does, for us.

[/p]

I guess the point to all my rambling is that if you want it, and it's working, you'll find a way to keep it working.

[/p]

Thanks for the thoughtful question and giving me an opportunity to blather on. ;-)

 

Take care,

Mick }>

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