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To hoom it mae cunsern, 


I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.   


I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..   


I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,   

Pepole really seam to respond 

to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.   


I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.     


My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,   


I can start emeditely.  Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.   


hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr. 






PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.   























Employer's response:


Dear Bryan ,   


It's OK honey, we've got spell check.



See you Monday.

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"She's Not Just A Pretty Face"


(Oh na, na, na)


She hosts a T.V. show--she rides the rodeo

She plays the bass in a band

She's an astronaut--

a valet at the parking lot

A farmer working the land

She is a champion--she gets the gold

She's a ballerina--the star of the show



She's--not--just a pretty face

She's--got--everything it takes

She has a fashion line--

a journalist for "Time"

Coaches a football team

She's a geologist--a romance novelist

She is a mother of three

She is a soldier--she is a wife

She is a surgeon--she'll save your life



She's--not--just a pretty face

She's--got--everything it takes

She's--mother--of the human race

She's--not--just a pretty face


Oh, oh, yeah

Oh na, na, na, na.....

She is your waitress--she is your judge--

she is your teacher

She is every woman in the world


Oh, la, la, la

She flies an airplane--

she dirve a subway train

At night she pumps gasoline

She's on the council--she's on the board

She's a politician--she praises the Lord


[Repeat Second Chorus]


No, she's (she's) not (not)--

just a pretty face

She's (she's) got (got)--everything it takes

She's--not--just a pretty face

She's got everything it takes

She's not just a pretty face

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Lookin, I'm absolutely insulted! You are clearly a racist and this thread is unseemly and disgusting. How dare you foster and promote a negative stereotype when everyone knows jive-speakin' Black folk aren't the only ones yappin their big-lipped traps while the movie plays. Have you ever seen a movie at Clearview's Chelsea? It's bad enough those roid queens need two seats for the price of one but, honey, oh honey, look out for the needy super-sized ones whose cell phones are permanently implanted in their right ear. God forbid they lose some connection or release the hip-lock they have on their latest play-fuck who looks and walks like a 1950's RCA TV. One quiet minute alone with a film is out of the question for those insecure baby elephants. And how bout those Polly protein-drink queens who can't stop farting. Be sure not to sit downwind of breakwind from those hard-muscled heffers who think every ten minutes is a scratch-n-sniff moment provided by John Waters. They can't resist providing us with their real deal. And what about those Twizzler twinks who can't afford a dentist? The sound of sucking sugar-gag-me-goo from cavity caves does nothing for James Horner. So, before you go blaming Blacks for everything that's wrong in the world, think again. Go see a movie at Clearview Chelsea and be sure to sit next to one those stupid guys with the pretty face and hot body. You'll see what I mean.

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