LivingnLA

Yes, such activity is very real. Some submissives need substantial pain during their Discipline sessions. That's why a well trained Dominant is so important. It's very easy to reach a point where permanent damage occurs.

So damn hot

Sounds like Animal House but homoerotic.

Anyone in the Greek system who's honest knows that great movie has alot of truth in it. Lol

Elaborate!

Haha! As I've said previously, I explored BDSM while in college and some of my 20s. In college, some guys who were curious about BDSM would occasionally approach me. I was a pretty open secret within the greek system at college. You can use your imagination from there. Just picture a shy but kinda cocky tennis player who wanted to submit himself to my attentions.

I love spanking. It's one of my favorite BDSM activities with women. I've only paddled guys in an official capacity though. Exploring BDSM in collage fit well with being my house disciplinarian.

http://www.wellredweekly.com/index.php?article=473.

Haha. This topic--American cooking shows vs. British cooking shows--has come up more than once over the years at dinner parties. One of my favorite ways to explore this has been to compare and contrast Gordon Ramsey's American shows versus his British originals. Here's a decent write-up and discussion about how American and British cultural expectations and norms are largely responsible for the variance.

http://web.archive.org/web/20071024011039/http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/tv/la-et-kitchen19sep19,1,6452711.story?coll=la-entnews-tv

http://ask.metafilter.com/193719/kitchen-nightmares-UK-and-US-version-why-is-there-such-a-huge-difference-in-quality

The proportions are off on quite a few of these guys, either because of photoshop or they seriously over-train their arms. Plus, a few are much too young for me. But, this guy, every day, all day, and twice on Sunday.

http://66.media.tumblr.com/9eb3f355bf31b90bcc69b0f4a39ade4f/tumblr_o7rrs5msK21srnz89o1_1280.jpg

And that image led me to tuffjock09.tumblr.com where I found this guy. His arm isn't pumped, but something about the way he looks at the camera. Mesmerizing.

http://66.media.tumblr.com/d70d52ed94594b02e2e70d759d0afa95/tumblr_o9c298GfKt1sjmh2co1_500.jpg

Source: http://hipstermenlover.tumblr.com/post/146455888657

This guy looks very familiar. Does he do porn? I know I've seen him somewhere before.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0i0IOKMmw3U/UAHtp0v8N9I/AAAAAAAABtc/2HGtznx5AwI/s1600/internet-memes-you-keep-telling-yourself-that.jpg

I'm used to kids crying when they see me, so I take negative comments as truth and let them fester deep in my brain until they burst forth in a new hideous feature.

On a serious note, I tend to do a quick mental assessment any time I receive feedback. When I feel there's a grain of truth, I'll consider the comment worth further processing. On the other hand, when I feel the comment is made from an unauthentic or negative point of view, I'll dismiss it and move on.

I've lusted in my heart for many straight guys. But on a hiring basis the one that tempted me the most was Alain Deberry. He seems to have a bit of an attitude though. Plus he quit bottoming before I was ever able to hire him. As I've said before, while I know the overwhelming majority of gay escorts are not going to be attracted to me, still there's something in knowing that a guy I'm with is actually attracted to other males and that he likes that kind of contact-for example the feel of beard stubble against his neck.

 

And yes I know about the Kinsey Scale. But I really question whether someone who is a 1 or a 2 (possibly even a 3) is really 'bisexual'. I mean yes they are by definition not completely straight. But in actuality do they have enough of an attraction for it to matter in the real world? I'm not sure that just being able to receive 'pleasure' from someone of the same sex should qualify you (or being able to achieve an erection considering the use of ED drugs and tri-mix)

 

There's a scene from the movie Scenes From The Class Struggle In Beverly Hills. If I remember correctly the character Robert Beltran plays, Juan, has a bet with Ray Sharkey's Frank over who can score with someone. Juan loses. The forfeit of the bet was that Frank being bisexual would get to perform oral on Juan if Juan lost. Juan lost. Afterwards I seem to remember Frank asking Juan how it was. Doesn't Juan admit to it feeling good and says something about one hole is like another?

 

But being a top I've never had the fantasy of wanting to be known biblically by a straight guy. I don't even want to be known biblically by someone who is gay. And considering my physical limitations of not having the strongest erections, I don't have the fantasy of being someone's first top. It's difficult for most first timers to relax. And junior has trouble staying hard against a closed entrance.

 

I'm not criticizing @LivingnLA. I'm trying to explain my feelings on the matter. I realize for you the stereotypical straight attitude is important. It's actually important for me too. But I prefer to find it in gay men which is why I don't consider it as much 'straight' attitude as I do a 'normal' attitude-where I'm using 'normal' more (but to my shame probably not completely) in the statistical sense of the term as being how the average/median guy acts.

 

Gman

Thanks Gman. I appreciate your reply and your passion. I don't know if you saw this post that I wrote about human sexuality or this related post, that tries to explain my personal position.

I tend to agree with the perspective that sexual orientation is independent of romantic orientation and physical activity capability. Yes, I believe most people live life such that all three align for them, but I believe that's largely a cultural construction and not reflective of biological reality, flexibility, or capability.

Your "normal attitude" is I think what most people describe as "masculine" and guys like this Bravo Delta are helping me to see this description and how it might reflect on my interests. Again, thanks for your comments. Well worth reading and thinking about for anyone interested in this complex topic.

There's definitely something about him. he's well over half a foot shorter than me. I've never thought about it before, but a guy like him could be a lot of fun and well worth exploring. His attitude in the youtube video was perfect. And it's interesting how he said he's 69% straight in the video buy lists as gay on RM. I'm starting to really enjoy the fungibility so many seem to have around this particular "identification."

Bravo does escort on RentMen.

Link?

I don't look like the jock, but I've tied up a twink like that once. Fun times.

From what I know, most rapists rape because of the power/thrill (which is why people of varying "attractiveness", age, etc. get raped, it's not about sexual attraction/gratification), so yes, he probably did.

Exactly. I've read reports of him being a bully and homophobic in high school. It all falls into a clear pattern of a personality that gets off on power and "winning at any cost." Sadly, he'll probably do it again because he and his support network haven't learned anything from his crimes. I hope his next victim is strong enough to standup too or better yet, fight back and beat some sense into him.

I agree. I heartily endorse the rest of Juan's post, but not that.

 

 

 

This case has been discussed extensively in my Twittersphere. A friend whose son just graduated from high school and is heading to college tweeted as follows:

Me: what would you do if you met a girl at a party and she passed out drink [drunk] behind a dumpster? Son: um, get help? *looks bewildered*

5 mins later, he asks: so what *should* you do, call an ambulance? We discussed options. He is ready for university, I guess.

 

(My response to the first tweet was "You would think that would be the obvious response." I love that he looked bewildered.)

 

Dating or hiring an escort is not a solution. That's not what rapists want. Rape is more about power and control than sex, which is why the competitive, "he scores!" view of normative male sexuality and the concomitant slut-shaming of women and view that it's their job to enforce boundaries is such a crock. I may have posted this link before, but if I have, here it is again.

 

http://goodmenproject.com/noseriouslywhatabouttehmenz/on-sexual-aggressiveness/

 

Key excerpt:

There are two models– one could call them the “rape culture” and the “consent culture” models. Very few people are pure rape-culture or pure consent-culture; nevertheless, I’ll describe them in their purest forms, so you can see them clearly.

 

Rape culture: Sex is about a man, who is the only one who actually desires sex, pushing a woman as far as she is willing to go. Sex occurs in a rigid set of steps: kissing, then breast-groping, then manual, then oral, then PIV; any other sex acts are signs that the man has Super Won (or that he’s a pathetic loser). Any tactic, short of ignoring a direct no (and even then) is allowable. Rape is basically like committing a foul: as long as you don’t do anything that’s technically against the rules, it’s all good, and calling someone a rapist for ignoring a “I’d rather not” is like the ref calling the ball out of bounds when it was clearly inside. If they have intercourse, the man has won and the woman has lost: he’s awesome, and she’s a slut who needs to learn to respect herself. The woman’s goal is to get a man into a relationship; if she gets his commitment, he’s pussywhipped and she’s a Smug Married/Be-boyfriend-ed (God I love Bridget Jones). Queer people can, with some straining, be fit into this model; the general idea is that one is the ‘man’ and another is the ‘woman.’

 

Consent culture: Some people decide that sex (whatever that means to them) would be fun and then have mutually enjoyable sex with each other. The end.

I know which model I prefer.

Well said.

Did you see the reports about Brock Turner's drug use in High School? Or the reports about him taking pics and sending them to his friends while he was raping the unconscious woman? Lastly, there have been reports of at least one woman at the frat party pushing Brock away for inappropriate touching. I'm speculating, but I wouldn't be surprised if Brock was fully conscious and aware of what he was doing and that be got off on knowing he was raping a helpless woman.

The spin that the rapist, father, and attorney put on this was incredible. They paint him as being the victim - of his own crime. The judge supports this position as well. His sentencing addresses the criminal as the victim and ignores the actual victim entirely.

 

If this guy is back on campus next year women should start carrying mace and hitting him with it spontaneously and at random. Imagine if the woman next to him in class suddenly shrieks, "Oh my God! Get away, get away!" and sprays him in the face with mace. Then it happens again when he's walking in a hallway or on a sidewalk, or when he's out at a bar, or in the bookstore. Any woman in his presence might take the opportunity to defend herself because she feels threatened by his demeanor or his movements -- because of his reputation.

LOL! I'm not a believer in vigilantism, but the horrible miscarriage of justice in the sentencing of Brock Allen Turner has pissed me off. He's a rapist who has zero remorse, thanks to his dad, Dan A. Turner, being an entitled rich asshole. The judge, a Stanford alumni and former athlete, should be censured.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/katiejmbaker/heres-the-powerful-letter-the-stanford-victim-read-to-her-ra?utm_term=.xjRe3a4R5#.tcBlEB4KN

 

Here's more info on the case, including testimony from the victim herself.

Yes, the full text of her statement is powerful. Brock Allen Turner is a rapist, period. His dad is a tool too because instead of being grateful for the very light sentence, he's complaining about how it's too much for his poor son who can't eat his favorite ribeyes right now. Dan A. Turner is an entitled ungrateful moron in my book.

No doubt, but what if he had been a friend or if they had been members of the swimming team?

Well, as they were grad students and he was a freshman, it's unlikely they were friends and grad students don't tend to do sports. They might've been a TA of one of his classes, but your point is received. All I'm saying, is it's also important to recognize when guys do the right thing too.

I wouldn't know how I would have reacted to something like that... but let's consider she's a young woman in college. Now a woman has to be perfect and go through "probation" (living with the guy out of wedlock) for a couple of years for him to even consider getting married, I'm sure a rape is a traumatizing experience considering a straight guy expect sex within the 2nd or 3rd date and he might move on without even calling back if she ain't perfect.

 

She got lucky to get some justice and I'm surprised the 2 other guys didn't join him in the rape, after all for them is just "getting pussy" joining a jock and say after that it was consensual, sad but true that now a days a jury would admit it makes sense.

http://www.thecrimson.com/article/2015/10/9/assault-no-grey-area/

Yes, there are plenty of dangerous men in our world, but let's please not disparage all men. The two graduate students who stumbled upon Brock Allen Turner raping an unconscious woman behind a dumpster did the right thing. They chased him off, tackled him, and restrained him until the cops arrived.

Damn, please add LOL next time!

LOL! I added an ascii emoji though my kids tell me my emoji fu is weak so that's probably why it was missed.

Let's compare the job creation of Clinton, Bush and Obama... I wonder who lost more jobs, and I'm not even going to sodomy laws, and gay marriage and before you say it: DOMA as a law was a way to avoid it in the constitution.

 

 

 

There's a whole party of ungrateful, uneducated, (mostly fat) people, who are resentful, don't trust science, don't believe in facts, are a mess in their own life yet talk about responsibility and keep falling for any cultural war (abortion, gay marriage, etc.) to feel good about themselves just by sitting in the sofa and yelling.

 

 

http://si.wsj.net/public/resources/images/BN-FW934_presjo_G_20141205131028.jpg

That was a lame attempt at a joke. The whole job creators propaganda is a diversionary tactic.

Also, there's nothing wrong with being a "bleeding heart liberal". Just sayin'

Other than they not being job creators. ;p

What a bizarre world this is in which an intelligent, healthy opinion might be attacked as a bleeding heart liberal reaction.

Thank you. I try. I know I'm a better man because of my wife, family, and friends. My work causes me to mix with a pretty diverse group of people, so I'm used to all sorts of names for my "liberal hippy" ways.

Yes, and until we stop trying to tell the victims how to feel and tell them they didn't get it as bad as they think they did, rape will have the masses moral support.

 

By telling a victim he/she should buck up and tone it down, what we are doing is (consciously or subconsciously) supporting the perpetrator.

Exactly this. I know I sound like a bleeding-heart liberal hippy, but I work with trauma victims regularly and men in privileged and protected positions--typically white & wealthy in America--often don't understand in a visceral gut-level way what being sexually assaulted is like for a woman. We are only just now beginning to barely acknowledge the deeply embedded sexism in our society. This knowledge is part of what's behind all the millennial guys who fear being naked in the gym. They are aware in a visceral way of what women have experienced for centuries: their bodies as sexual objects of lust by predatory men.

At the risk of sounding like I'm minimizing the horrors of rape, which is not my intention, some of these statements (if indeed it was she who wrote them) are a bit over the top:

Doe described in detail the "irreversible," permanent damage the assault caused on her life. She became "closed off, angry, self-deprecating, tired, irritable, empty." She lost sleep and independence. She eventually left her job.... She recounted the invasive exam she underwent to collect evidence — photographs, swabs, drawn blood...

 

While she may need some extensive counseling, there is no reason this event has to define and ruin her whole life. By her own testimony, she wasn't even conscious while it happened. And pelvic exams and blood draws are procedures almost all women have to go through during their lives. The last thing I want to do is minimize the seriousness of the crime. And I do think the rapist's sentence was too light. He should also be held liable financially for the cost of her counseling, which this woman apparently seriously needs, and other monetary losses she incurred. But I think it would be a mistake for her do live her whole life as nothing but a rape victim.

I'm sorry, but I respectfully disagree. You are minimizing the horror of rape for this woman. I'd ask you to reread what you wrote and think about it from the perspective of a rape victim. Try to be in her shoes. Waking up in the hospital. With bruises, cuts, blood, and soreness that you have zero memory of anything that could've caused all of it. There is zero comparison between a medical pelvic exam which you are conscious of consenting to and waking up with bruised sore genitals with dirt and other particles shoved inside and no memory of how it happened. The level of disassociation and psychological trauma are very real and significant for such victims.

To make matters worse, she had to relive that trauma regularly all throughout the trial plus additional traumas caused by a puerile media looking to sensationalize her experience and a savvy defense attorney trying to discredit and destroy her. And that doesn't even touch on her likely own self-hatred, guilt, and whatever her boyfriend and family went through and did to her.

With extensive and expensive counseling, she should recover, but she will always have this as a part of her. This is something many men--especially white men--frequently do not comprehend about women in our patriarchal sexist society. Most women go through life with a deeply embedded and constant "hum" of fear about men. Think of how the phrase "boys will be boys" was used in the past to excuse aggression in boys? Think of all the stories about "boys only want one thing" that we tell our girls over and over. Yes, there's some truth, but the underlying message our girls receive as they grow up in America is that men are dangerous and that you never know when one of them will go from catcalls, or comments on your "rack" to physically or sexually assaulting you. Sadly, given the statistics and news stories it happens quite regularly and is rarely reported because of this! Our society minimizes or even dismisses the victim's pain and suffering and barely punishes the rapist.

Until our society truly tackles the reality of how common rape is in America--and boys and men are raped too--we will never have a just society and we will never have true sexual equality.