Brad

As I look at escort ads, I notice now that most escorts under 30 years old have tattoos. And not just a single tat, but several all over - arms, legs, calves and chests. This trend has been around for several years and seems to be getting more common.

 

Does anyone here think that the tattoos make a guy look better? I don't. My opinion is that they cover and distract from a beautiful body - especially if they are large - like ones that cover an entire pectoral muscle - or an entire arm sleeve. But I'm betting that I'm in the minority.

 

As the tattoo trend seems to grow, it makes me think of the saying: "Nothing expresses your individuality like doing exactly what everyone else is doing."

Tattoos are compensation for a sense of deficiency. Sad.

To quote Sara Jane Smith - "There are some things that are worth having your heart broken for".

Love that quote… Life is worth it…

TruHart, thank you for a thoughtful post. Some of us are better than others at keeping our emotions out of this. Those of us who like to "feel a connection" or will risk "falling in love a little" may occasionally need a reminder that there's a difference between a "boyfriend experience" and a "boyfriend."

 

 

 

We may be "escort" and "client," but we're also just two guys -- two human beings -- and aside from the advice we always read about "thinking with our big head, not our little head," sometimes it's not about thinking at all, but about feeling. Not with either head, but from the heart.

 

 

 

Rare and magical indeed! I've liked some of the guys I've met through this "hobby" very much, but there's only one who really got to me -- on a completely different, deeper emotional level. There was no decision about it; it's just what I felt. For those of you shaking your heads at the foolishness of this -- hey, I won't even argue. I know perfectly well that we are not going to ride off into the sunset together, but I care about the guy, and I'd like to think that a friendly feeling -- if not a boyfriendly feeling -- is mutual.

 

I'd like to think it, but in addition to being one-third Romantic, I'm two-thirds Skeptic. (I don't even need another person for a tug-o-war.)

 

 

 

Sounds appealing, Brad ... unless the feelings aren't mutual and until the parameters are not respected ... and if only the relationship wasn't clouded by commerce. Which leaves me feeling that TruHart and corndog probably have the right idea -- practical, head-over-heart -- about "falling in love a little" only for the appointed hour or two and then getting back to reality.

 

[score one for the Skeptic, but I can feel the Romantic yanking my chain right now.]

Loving someone comes with accountability regardless if it's mutual… especially when you are an adult and have lived some. To expect reciprocation is the ego… Loving and true love is growth. It should always be the head over heart, especially when it's under the agreement of an escort client situation and when there is a wife and kids involved… but it doesn't mean you can't learn how to feel and allow it fully. Allowing it fully doesn't mean love letters and pining.

Carrying the love past the appointment is called "heartache."

Heartache only means you're not living reality… falling in love doesn't have to entail being insane.

I agree with your thinking Brad, and with Jack G.'s summation too. Still, when I (personally) have a true BFE, it always seems to me that the escort is so invested and interactive that I actually fall in love for the time we spend together. Don't get me wrong, I don't carry the love past the end of our time together, but during our time together I feel a meshing of ourselves physically and mentally. Good acting? Maybe but so good I don't feel the line between authenticity and artifice, during our time together! Yes, it absolutely is a truly special escort skill but I do think all the greats I've connected with on the BFE level have that skill, some stronger than others!

 

JMHO

 

TruHart1

What would be so wrong with carrying the love past the appointment? Does that say something bad about you? No… it doesn't. The mature part about it is that there is an understanding. I have love for clients… but I am an adult and I know they're married or I'm fully aware of the parameters of how we know each other… I live my life…I'm a grown up; but it doesn't mean the love isn't real.

On his website, Jack Gunther referred to it as "The Authenticity of Fantasy." Sounds about right to me.

Or like Joan Rivers said "It's all like a movie…" I like what Jack says too…

I totally agree, Brad. I prefer a BFE type of experience. Most of the time, sessions feel like affectionate hookups. But, when there's a real connection and we both relax and just enjoy the moment, it's magical.

Totally magical- real stuff… Why not? It can transcend.

Authenticity, opposed to putting on a show and being manipulative so that when your hand reaches out at the end of an appointment it's back-uped by how many hoops you jumped through. I don't believe it's something any escort can do, because that is the actual skill, being yourself, and when we know we're giving that… so will the client. It's not just an escort thing though… being yourself isn't for everyone. Humans are truly sophisticated, though we often deny that mechanism; but when we feel something real, opposed to the alternative, it's undeniable. It's the difference between sky diving from a plane and going on a roller coaster; your body knows the difference. So in that… there is no preparation aside from what you'd normally do. That's the BFE… real opposed to going to Disneyland. And how does it differ… from the Non-BFE? Same person… less exposed.