body2body

Really brilliant article in a recent TO/NY
 
https://www.timeout.com/newyork/theater/a-guide-to-theater-etiquette

I'm interested in handsome guys, no doubt. However, I like a sexy body too. It's what you consider a sexy body.
For some it's this:http://www.evolutionofbodybuilding.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/1.-phil-heath.png
For me it's this:

This is my favorite

This is my favorite

This is my favorite

This is my favorite

Yes, I wrote a check last week to a neighbor for $64 to pay for a bottle of Cologne she had picked up for me in France (it’s no longer available here). I used a check to pay my plumber to install a new kitchen faucet. They still have a use for me. At my business, we encourage clients to pay by check. Because we deal with expensive merchandise the credit card merchant fees can amount to thousands of dollars. I’ll gladly wait a few days for a check in the mail.

Yes, I wrote a check last week to a neighbor for $64 to pay for a bottle of Cologne she had picked up for me in France (it’s no longer available here). I used a check to pay my plumber to install a new kitchen faucet. They still have a use for me. At my business, we encourage clients to pay by check. Because we deal with expensive merchandise the credit card merchant fees can amount to thousands of dollars. I’ll gladly wait a few days for a check in the mail.

I love receiving flowers. At home in my desk I have a box with letters, postcards, and cards from people I’ve been romantically involved with. There is one I look at often. Back in the 70s I had a terrible argument with a man I was very much in love with. The next day I came home from work and on my doorstep was a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a note-
I love you still
I love you now
I will love you always
He died of AIDS in 1985, but I still have the memory of those beautiful flowers, and the card.

I love receiving flowers. At home in my desk I have a box with letters, postcards, and cards from people I’ve been romantically involved with. There is one I look at often. Back in the 70s I had a terrible argument with a man I was very much in love with. The next day I came home from work and on my doorstep was a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a note-
I love you still
I love you now
I will love you always
He died of AIDS in 1985, but I still have the memory of those beautiful flowers, and the card.

I enjoyed it immensely. I found the story set in the 40s beautiful and tragic, and found in the modern story a number of parallels to my own life, which made it all the more involving for me. I too would recommend it.

If that was Los Angeles she would need to have a smart phone in her hand sending a text.

It has to do with what we consider respect for the dead. That's why we don't do viewings or open casket funerals. For some reason that I can't remember, one of my grandfathers did have a viewing. I was in college at the time. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to go. My Mom finally said to me that my brother -he's the second oldest grandchild and the oldest male grandchild-was going, and I should let him be my representative.
 
After that I never really had an opportunity to go to a viewing or an open casket funeral until I was in my thirties or my forties. I have to tell you I that I find them creepy.
 
 
At my father's funeral a year ago, we, and the rest of the mourners who wanted to, did shovel dirt into the grave. But it was more symbolic. There were still people from the cemetery who finished the job after the last of the mourners put in the last shovelful.
 
 
In large cities there are burial societies called Chevra Kadisha (Holy Society) that prepare the body for burial-all male groups for men and all female for women. These are volunteer positions. There can be more than one per city affiliated with different synagogues. The deceased is never left alone. There is always someone present -sort of like an honor guard. Working on the Chevra Kadisha is considered a mitzvah-holy/good deed/commandment. My oldest cousin was on one for years. She helped with at least one of our grandmothers-possibly both. She said it was the last respectful thing she could do. This was twenty or so years ago. I still get teary thinking about it.
 
Gman

It has to do with what we consider respect for the dead. That's why we don't do viewings or open casket funerals. For some reason that I can't remember, one of my grandfathers did have a viewing. I was in college at the time. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to go. My Mom finally said to me that my brother -he's the second oldest grandchild and the oldest male grandchild-was going, and I should let him be my representative.
 
After that I never really had an opportunity to go to a viewing or an open casket funeral until I was in my thirties or my forties. I have to tell you I that I find them creepy.
 
 
At my father's funeral a year ago, we, and the rest of the mourners who wanted to, did shovel dirt into the grave. But it was more symbolic. There were still people from the cemetery who finished the job after the last of the mourners put in the last shovelful.
 
 
In large cities there are burial societies called Chevra Kadisha (Holy Society) that prepare the body for burial-all male groups for men and all female for women. These are volunteer positions. There can be more than one per city affiliated with different synagogues. The deceased is never left alone. There is always someone present -sort of like an honor guard. Working on the Chevra Kadisha is considered a mitzvah-holy/good deed/commandment. My oldest cousin was on one for years. She helped with at least one of our grandmothers-possibly both. She said it was the last respectful thing she could do. This was twenty or so years ago. I still get teary thinking about it.
 
Gman

A very close friend died in the early 90s of AIDS. He was Jewish and the funeral happened very quickly (perhaps the next day). There was no embalming, there was a simple service, his simple wooden casket was at the front of the room. After the service was finished his friends and family carried the casket up to his grave site and put it in the grave. Then we covered his casket with soil. None of this putting a small handfull of soil on the casket, we used shovels and completely covered the casket.
Then everyone went back to his house. It was very direct and honest. There was a sense of finality in the participation of the mourners that I had never experienced before. I preferred it to the Christian services I have attended with the embalmed bodies often displayed and made up to appear “life like”. I found that this service really helped me to grieve due to the directness and acknowledgement of the death.

A very close friend died in the early 90s of AIDS. He was Jewish and the funeral happened very quickly (perhaps the next day). There was no embalming, there was a simple service, his simple wooden casket was at the front of the room. After the service was finished his friends and family carried the casket up to his grave site and put it in the grave. Then we covered his casket with soil. None of this putting a small handfull of soil on the casket, we used shovels and completely covered the casket.
Then everyone went back to his house. It was very direct and honest. There was a sense of finality in the participation of the mourners that I had never experienced before. I preferred it to the Christian services I have attended with the embalmed bodies often displayed and made up to appear “life like”. I found that this service really helped me to grieve due to the directness and acknowledgement of the death.

Ok, middle of the night, need to do an addendum. I prefer specificity as a rule, I agree with The Economist in using he or she instead of the awkward "they" in nearly all cases. However if an individual doesn't fit, then of course there should be flexibility.
 
Recently, Asia Kate Dillon needed to classify themselves as an Actor as opposed to Actress in order to qualify for an award (incidentally, historically "Actor" is gender nonspecific). But outside of the award competition if they ("they" applies in Dillon's case) would prefer being called a "performer" it would fit, it would make sense, it would be right.
 
A rule can bend and still be a rule.
 
Asia Kate Dillon, the remarkable Taylor on "Billions"
 

 
I now return you to the discussion of lotions and clean linens.

Downward dog, and upward cock.

I travel in London by Public Transport almost exclusively. My experience has been that the 7 day Travel Card is the best value. It gives you unlimited use of Tube, buses, DLR, Overground, and National Rail. Pretty much everything in central London can be found in zones 1 and 2. A 7 day zone 1 and 2 is £34.10. A zone 1-6 ( which will take you to Hampton Court Palace, Kew Gardens, Windsor Castle) is around £62. You can have your Travel Card put on an Oyster for £5 deposit (that’s what it was in 2016, my last visit). I would buy a 7 day Travel Card for zones 1-2 to start, and during your second or third week if your travels are going to take you further afield you could get a zone 1-4, or 1-6. Here is the zone map
https://www.google.com/search?q=london+transport+zones+map&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&hl=en-us&client=safari#imgrc=epFZ-NBZ1lIkYM:

Think about what you want to do. For many years I stayed near Paddington at a Hotel that fronted on Hyde Park. I found more and more, that every trip had me heading to the South Bank where the Tate Modern, National Theatre, Old Vic, Young Vic, Shakespeare’s Globe are located. So, my last few trips I have stayed on the South Bank. I stayed at the Novotel Blackfriars (modern amenities , comfortable, 100 yds from Southwark tube, 4 blocks to Waterloo station). I’m going in August for a Theatre binge (ticket prices are fraction of New York ticket prices), this time I’m staying at the recently opened Hilton Bankside, which has great reviews, a popular restaurant and bar. I tend to take day trips during the day (Bath, Brighton, Hampton Court Palace, Stonehenge, Windsor are all easy day trips by train).
The National Gallery has an incredible collection, but because it is free it tends to be a mob scene, try to go early. The National Portrait Gallery around the Corner is wonderful. You can see the faces of historical figures, authors, artists. I enjoy it. The Tate Britain for the Turners, as well as some sublime Hockney portraits, and fine examples of Lucien Freud, and Francis Bacon. The Tate Modern (across the river) has a vast collection of contemporary art and a reputation for mounting blockbuster shows. The Wallace Collection is a personal collection of Old Master Paintings, and the finest 18th Century French Furniture (according to the French) in the setting of a London Townhouse. The recently re-done Imperial War Museum is also fascinating. There is so much to do, to have the luxury of a couple weeks to explore London and the surrounding sites is wonderful. Buy a London Travel Card for zones 1 and 2, you can use it on the tube or buses, and it will get you a discount on local train fares. You can buy it here, or in London at any of the major rail stations.

Think about what you want to do. For many years I stayed near Paddington at a Hotel that fronted on Hyde Park. I found more and more, that every trip had me heading to the South Bank where the Tate Modern, National Theatre, Old Vic, Young Vic, Shakespeare’s Globe are located. So, my last few trips I have stayed on the South Bank. I stayed at the Novotel Blackfriars (modern amenities , comfortable, 100 yds from Southwark tube, 4 blocks to Waterloo station). I’m going in August for a Theatre binge (ticket prices are fraction of New York ticket prices), this time I’m staying at the recently opened Hilton Bankside, which has great reviews, a popular restaurant and bar. I tend to take day trips during the day (Bath, Brighton, Hampton Court Palace, Stonehenge, Windsor are all easy day trips by train).
The National Gallery has an incredible collection, but because it is free it tends to be a mob scene, try to go early. The National Portrait Gallery around the Corner is wonderful. You can see the faces of historical figures, authors, artists. I enjoy it. The Tate Britain for the Turners, as well as some sublime Hockney portraits, and fine examples of Lucien Freud, and Francis Bacon. The Tate Modern (across the river) has a vast collection of contemporary art and a reputation for mounting blockbuster shows. The Wallace Collection is a personal collection of Old Master Paintings, and the finest 18th Century French Furniture (according to the French) in the setting of a London Townhouse. The recently re-done Imperial War Museum is also fascinating. There is so much to do, to have the luxury of a couple weeks to explore London and the surrounding sites is wonderful. Buy a London Travel Card for zones 1 and 2, you can use it on the tube or buses, and it will get you a discount on local train fares. You can buy it here, or in London at any of the major rail stations.

Think about what you want to do. For many years I stayed near Paddington at a Hotel that fronted on Hyde Park. I found more and more, that every trip had me heading to the South Bank where the Tate Modern, National Theatre, Old Vic, Young Vic, Shakespeare’s Globe are located. So, my last few trips I have stayed on the South Bank. I stayed at the Novotel Blackfriars (modern amenities , comfortable, 100 yds from Southwark tube, 4 blocks to Waterloo station). I’m going in August for a Theatre binge (ticket prices are fraction of New York ticket prices), this time I’m staying at the recently opened Hilton Bankside, which has great reviews, a popular restaurant and bar. I tend to take day trips during the day (Bath, Brighton, Hampton Court Palace, Stonehenge, Windsor are all easy day trips by train).
The National Gallery has an incredible collection, but because it is free it tends to be a mob scene, try to go early. The National Portrait Gallery around the Corner is wonderful. You can see the faces of historical figures, authors, artists. I enjoy it. The Tate Britain for the Turners, as well as some sublime Hockney portraits, and fine examples of Lucien Freud, and Francis Bacon. The Tate Modern (across the river) has a vast collection of contemporary art and a reputation for mounting blockbuster shows. The Wallace Collection is a personal collection of Old Master Paintings, and the finest 18th Century French Furniture (according to the French) in the setting of a London Townhouse. The recently re-done Imperial War Museum is also fascinating. There is so much to do, to have the luxury of a couple weeks to explore London and the surrounding sites is wonderful. Buy a London Travel Card for zones 1 and 2, you can use it on the tube or buses, and it will get you a discount on local train fares. You can buy it here, or in London at any of the major rail stations.

My Father always said that the Gibson Cocktail originated with Hugh Gibson, a handsome career diplomat, who held positions as US Ambassador to Poland, Belgium, Luxembourg, Brazil, and Switzerland. He was also a leading figure in disarmament talks between the wars. Ambassador Gibson, wanted to keep a clear head at diplomatic cocktail parties and receptions. Martinis had become popular and Gibson instructed his staff that they were to put only water in a cocktail glass and garnish it with an onion so he could identify his drink. Gibson was good looking and charming and soon it was noted that he drank dry martinis with his special garnish, and people started to emulate him, and the “Gibson” became a popular Martini variant. It also blew the Ambassador’s ruse. I know this is probably apocryphal but it was a good story, and I used to tell it to customers on slow nights when I was tending bar in College.

My Father always said that the Gibson Cocktail originated with Hugh Gibson, a handsome career diplomat, who held positions as US Ambassador to Poland, Belgium, Luxembourg, Brazil, and Switzerland. He was also a leading figure in disarmament talks between the wars. Ambassador Gibson, wanted to keep a clear head at diplomatic cocktail parties and receptions. Martinis had become popular and Gibson instructed his staff that they were to put only water in a cocktail glass and garnish it with an onion so he could identify his drink. Gibson was good looking and charming and soon it was noted that he drank dry martinis with his special garnish, and people started to emulate him, and the “Gibson” became a popular Martini variant. It also blew the Ambassador’s ruse. I know this is probably apocryphal but it was a good story, and I used to tell it to customers on slow nights when I was tending bar in College.

My Father always said that the Gibson Cocktail originated with Hugh Gibson, a handsome career diplomat, who held positions as US Ambassador to Poland, Belgium, Luxembourg, Brazil, and Switzerland. He was also a leading figure in disarmament talks between the wars. Ambassador Gibson, wanted to keep a clear head at diplomatic cocktail parties and receptions. Martinis had become popular and Gibson instructed his staff that they were to put only water in a cocktail glass and garnish it with an onion so he could identify his drink. Gibson was good looking and charming and soon it was noted that he drank dry martinis with his special garnish, and people started to emulate him, and the “Gibson” became a popular Martini variant. It also blew the Ambassador’s ruse. I know this is probably apocryphal but it was a good story, and I used to tell it to customers on slow nights when I was tending bar in College.