Sharing some insights below to elucidate a couple of blindspots in our discussion so far:
1. There is a spectrum of attitudes and practices around drug-use among providers.
The PNP designation can refer to personal use, but it can also refer to the acceptability of client use or availability of PNP drugs. The concordance of these three isn't 1:1:1 -- it can be a mixed bag out there (Ex: There are escorts who do not use but are ok with clients using.)
Regardless, among gay male escorts, many are users -- either in their personal or work lives. This should not come as a surprise -- while there are some out there with endogenously high sex drives (in frequency and quantity of sex daily and nocturally-shifted circadian rhythms, it is just as easily replicated and probably more common as a secondary consequence of stimulant abuse).
Of the ones who use, some are more functional. And -- surprise -- you have likely had sessions with them while they were high, unbeknownst to you and what your charicature of drug use may be. And others are less functional -- these are easy to spot -- they are the canonical disorganized, emotionally labile, terminally tardy, and physically unpredictable horror stories we read about.
2. PNP advertisements aren't the full story.
Some choose to advertise -- the benefit is that they net PNP clients, who often prefer longer sessions and are hence more lucrative. Or they get clients who are ok if they use or are high in-session. The risk is that they lose clients who adversely perceive any proximity of a provider to PNP.
At the same time, others refrain from advertising, helpful at retaining potential straight-edge clients. But the omission does not mean a provider does not partake. PNP may still be on-the-menu or even part of their daily use -- just not advertised. There are also other factors that might influence the decision to advertise or not -- for example, some may not want those in their social/personal lives to know of their use, and care less about the perception of potential clients.
3. Among the providers who advertise as drug-free, not all actually are.
Some personally PNP, but do not like it for work. And some use the designation to justify tacking on a surcharge, if asked. I'll analogize this to the issue of condoms -- some "safe only" providers do bareback -- for more.
All of this is to say -- please ask yourselves what is important to you?
Is it a drug-free environment? A meth-free environment? Someone who doesn't have sex with drug-users? Someone who can pass as put-together? Someone not actively on drugs? Someone who never uses drugs?
Then take the lead and express your preference to your potential provider and if its a dealbreaker.
The exchange is quick and easy, more explicit about one's true preferences, relies on fewer assumptions on language that can be vague/omitted, and avoids the need to ask providers what their practices are -- which can be perceived as judgmental and might not even be accurate.
Chemical dependence is an issue that weighs heavily in our community, and the little things we can do to mitigate its stigma will make it easier for those -- including many of the providers we patronize -- seek help.
TLDR: Our patronage of this industry places us at most 1 degree away from those who may be struggling with chemical dependence. We can be better stewards of the industry and supportive of the providers we see by (1) taking the lead and expressing what our preferences are around drug use to potential providers and (2) refraining from the use of language that reinforces stigma, which might incentivize some to be dishonest in their disclosures and adds to the obstacle of seeking help if needed.
