Age of Consent Laws

[bigguyinpasadena]

So if we disagree with your POV we are not participating in an ernest discussion:-(

That is one way to stack the deck in your favor.

[Epigonos]

In reality the whole concept of Age of Consent Laws regarding sexual relations only has meaning when one is speaking about sex between one person UNDER the age of consent and one person OVER the age of consent. I taught high school for over thirty years and if anybody thinks that kids in that age group know about Age of Consent Laws, care about Age of Consent Laws or comply with Age of Consent Laws the only person they are deluding is themselves. High school age kids HAVE SEX WITH EACH OTHER PERIOD -- end of discussion.

[Lookin]

With regard to emotional and physical health, I think that society's reaction to kids having sex is at least as important as the sex itself. (Please note that I'm not speaking of procreative sex, which could cause harm at any age; and I'm not speaking of exploitative sex, which is harmful anywhere at any age.)

 

If a sixteen-year-old has sex in Spain, where society considers it legal, my guess is (s)he would have a pretty good time. If (s)he did it in the U.S., and had to endure parental sanctions, or help send a partner to jail, it could easily be emotionally damaging. If (s)he did it in Iran, the harm could extend to stoning or death. (I'll never forget the picture of those two teenage boys hanging dead at the end of a rope.)

 

In countries that have lowered their age of consent laws, I'm not aware of any upswing in harmful effects to the newly "enfranchised" age groups. If you are, please let me know, and I'll reconsider my viewpoint.

 

Society also plays a role in getting kids emotionally prepared for sex. If sex between eighteen-year-olds is the norm, then parents, schools, and the media have probably given the child some things to think about. If sex until twenty is unthinkable, or sex before marriage, the child probably gets those messages too. And that preparation will almost certainly have an effect on how damaged an eighteen-year-old ends up being if (s)he goes ahead and has sex.

 

I'm not saying that sex can't be emotionally or physically damaging to someone under twenty. I'm just saying that society - as much as nature - affects that damage; and society can increase or decrease that damage dramatically by how it reacts to that sex. And we know that society's reactions to sex - young/old, gay/straight, vanilla/kink - are subject to change over time and from one locale to another.

 

My guess is that Epigonos' high school was probably more the norm than the exception. Kids who feel like having sex will do it and, with knowledge about protection, will probably be OK. Unless, of course, it's a strict religious school and then they'll go straight to hell.

 

Those are my thoughts. I'd like to know more about your experiences, and how they shaped your thinking.

[Guest zipperzone]

>Your hypocrisy is quite ironic and hasn't gone without note

>by several people involved at this message center.

 

My, my - doesn't that sound official.

 

>I feel had I made a post advocating lowering the age of

>consent in all western countries to 14 the majority of you

>would have taken the complete opposite view that you took

>here. You can fool yourself and say no - I believe it to be

>true based on your posting histories.

 

Empire: I don't think the above statement has any validity at all. But I think the age of consent for anyone having sex with you should be raised to somewhere north of 50. By that time your emotional maturity should have reached the stage whereby you won't be overly damaged.

[Athan]

--“The truth is that sexuality, AND WE'VE KNOWN THIS AT LEAST SINCE FREUD, is an integral and irreducible part of childhood. There is no such thing as a pristine childhood that is untouched by sexuality. We can teach children how to be safe and happy sexual beings and contribute to their health and well-being or we can pass laws that further restrict the age at which they can have sex and restrict their access to knowledge and then they can grow up as many of us did--repressed, unhappy, in the closet, flirting with illicit sex, unaware of condoms and birth control methods, afraid of sex, and dysfunctional. If that sounds like a good idea, why not extend childhood to the age of 30?”--

 

Well said! I personally started having sex at age 14 when I came out as Gay. (I was one of those emotionally 'early bloomers') And I can speak from personal experience...the people I have met who started having sex earlier in life are far more stable, when it comes to sex and emotions, than those whom I have met that began having sex in their 20's (or even 30's or 40's). But of course, this is just my experience.

 

--“I'm not saying that sex can't be emotionally or physically damaging to someone under twenty. I'm just saying that society - as much as nature - affects that damage; and society can increase or decrease that damage dramatically by how it reacts to that sex. And we know that society's reactions to sex - young/old, gay/straight, vanilla/kink - are subject to change over time and from one locale to another.”--

 

Very good point! Take for example Bonobo Chimps. They are a species of chimps that solve all their conflicts with sex. No matter of age or sex they engage in a form of sexual activity with whomever they have a quarrel with. This helps relieve stress and strengthens their bonds after a fight. They are also documented as being the most peaceful of all the primates. I know this may seem a bit off topic, but my point is: Consentual sex at any age doesn't create problems, it is how our peers, communities and society reacts to that sex that creates the problems.

 

But, on a side note, in regaurds to the slight tension about the debating going on in this thread... Consider that it is Man's greatest flaw that "he" desires to be "Right" ("or not-wrong"). Man has a habit of sacrificing everything to be "right"...love, life, TRUTH, relationships, peace...etc...all just to be "right". I assert that most laws are put in place so that those who think there "should be a way that life is" can be justified and made "right", but what they sacrifice for that is being able to accept people as they are or being able to deal with life as it shows up. That is why, instead of empowering future generations to make their own decisions, structures are put in place to force them to choose "our-right-way".

[Lookin]

Bonobos are a wonderful species! They're closely related to humans, sharing 97% of our DNA.

 

In addition to conflict resolution, they also use sex as a greeting and as a way to get food. Allegedly, they're the only species other than humans to engage in genital sex, oral sex and French kissing.

 

I wonder if they have their own website?

[Lookin]

Bonobos are a wonderful species! They're closely related to humans, sharing 97% of our DNA.

 

In addition to conflict resolution, they also use sex as a greeting and as a way to get food. Allegedly, they're the only species other than humans to engage in genital sex, oral sex and French kissing.

 

I wonder if they have their own website?

[Guest empire]

http://www.sandiegozoo.org/animalbytes/images/bonobo_Hairstyle_inset.jpg

[Lookin]

The one on the left looks like he's under 20.

 

Let's hope it's platonic!

[twinkboylover28]

LOL nice photo!

 

There's a law pending in Michigan that wants to lower the legal age for hunting down to 12-years-old.

 

In other words, you can pick up a riffle and kill a deer, but God forbid teenagers have consentual sex.

[Juan Vancouver]

oy!

 

> Aren't some

>of you who are beating me up and insulting me the same people

>who beat up and insulted escort Juan Vancouver for his views

>on older adult - younger teen sex? I believe you are.

 

 

Boy, oh boy!

 

I have been in a incomunicated trip for more than two weeks, and the first time that I check the site I find my name inexorably linked with age of consent laws...

 

Dear Empire, I kind of think that I know what you mean... except there was nobody but one single person trying to warp my words (or insisting that my posts were so unclear that they might have been construed as a support for children molestation.) As far as I am concerned everyone was respectfull and polite. (Exception made of He whose name shall not be named.) :+

 

Besides, I was not talking about my own personal views, but the little knowledge I have about age of consent laws and how different they are in different parts of the world.

 

You seem to be very interested in the fascinating world of sexuality from the ethical and psycological point of view. There has been a lot of research in this field, and there is a lot of material that you can read about it. Someone said that a personal opinion without any factual information might as well be a fantasy. Why wasting such precious material and trying to re-discover the wheel? One of my favourite works about this is Focault's "The history of sexuality". Hard to read, but -in my personal opinion- one of the clearest, most complete works about this fascinating subject.

 

Concepts like restraint, marriage, abstinence, non-sexual childhood, fidelity, purity, virginity, concepts that some regard as normal, desirable and "healthy" have been created just to fulfill very specific social needs in different periods in history. If we stay irrationally attached to them and try to validate them just because "that's how we do things", we will perhaps be missing the point. (For example, circumcision in jewish tradition might have had more to do with higyene in very harsh weathers, rather than with Yaweh's hatred towards foreskin. It fulfilled a very specific need then.) -Fuck, now I have been touching almost all tricky subjects that one must never talk about during dinner... I might as well talk about politics... My grandmother would crucify me. (Fuck, religion again!!!)

 

Regarding your post, I will have to agree with others that repressing and denying our sexual drive sooner or later will create more problems than it would prevent. I personally believe that if society promotes emotional health, and educates us in responsible ways to exercise our sexuality, we shouldnt be worried at all about a 19 year old "child" having sex.

 

He will be fine.

 

(And -again- this was meant to be a short, funny post.) x(

[Juan Vancouver]

RE: Age of Consent Laws (In Canada)

 

Hey Zipp,

 

The age of consent was not different for gay or straight sex. The only difference was that anal sex was not allowed (for some obscure and sadistic reason) until after 18.

That of course, left male homosexual lovers with nothing that a lick here and there, and therefore has been deemed discriminating and is in its way out.

 

The age of consent is 14.

 

And yes.... may God bless Canada! (And all them canucks) :9