how GAY are YOU?

[jjkrkwood]

I don't insist on using the term "straight-acting." In fact, I would rather not. That is why I asked you explicitly what term you would like me to use. I think your answer was "masculine." True?

 

The remark about syllables and character strokes is clearly meant to be a sarcastic addition to your other remarks. I think.

 

I understand why you object to "straight-acting," I really do. It's just that whenever I read one of your posts on the topic, I keep waiting for you to suggest an alternative, and I haven't seen one yet. I may have missed the post where you did, and if so, I apologize.

 

Now, if I start using the term "masculine" (not "straight," not "male"), is that OK with you?

 

gp, WHY do you even NEED a term ???? Cant the conversation be had WITHOUT injecting "terms" into it ?

[gp0560]

gp, WHY do you even NEED a term ???? Cant the conversation be had WITHOUT injecting "terms" into it ?

 

Well, for one, how else do you suggest I find an escort who does not shriek "girl friend" at me, who does not use a lot of flamboyant hand gestures, who does not always stand with one hip thrust out to the side, and so on? Do I list those kinds of thing in my search? Should an escort list those kinds of thing in his ad?

 

It's easy for you, jj. All you need to say is, "ISO huge cock." :p

 

Isn't there some efficient way to describe what I am looking for or what an escort offers? Rick wants me/us not to use "straight-acting." I'm OK with that, but "straight-acting" is a term that I need a substitute for. I think that Rick suggests "masculine," but I'm not sure yet. I'm open to other suggestions.

 

Come on, guys, don't act as if you don't know what I'm trying to get at. (I don't mean just you, jj; I mean forum readers in general.) BTW, I don't think this is a frivolous question. I/We need an acceptable substitute for "straight-acting," IMO, and I'd like to know what it is.

[jjkrkwood]

Well, for one, how else do you suggest I find an escort who does not shriek "girl friend" at me, who does not use a lot of flamboyant hand gestures, who does not always stand with one hip thrust out to the side, and so on? Do I list those kinds of thing in my search? Should an escort list those kinds of thing in his ad?

 

It's easy for you, jj. All you need to say is, "ISO huge cock." :p

 

Isn't there some efficient way to describe what I am looking for or what an escort offers? Rick wants me/us not to use "straight-acting." I'm OK with that, but "straight-acting" is a term that I need a substitute for. I think that Rick suggests "masculine," but I'm not sure yet. I'm open to other suggestions.

 

Come on, guys, don't act as if you don't know what I'm trying to get at. (I don't mean just you, jj; I mean forum readers in general.) BTW, I don't think this is a frivolous question. I/We need an acceptable substitute for "straight-acting," IMO, and I'd like to know what it is.

 

Well gp, if this is truly such an issue for you, I think "masculine" in the escorts descriptive should give an indication. If you need more clarification, ASK when you speak to him. As for "straight actting", i am not really sure WHAT that is anymore, since I know alot of guys that are truly str8 (at least to my knowledge) and seem much MORE gay than me. The effeminate, stereotypical traits you describe as turn-offs to you will usually come across in the pics used. Yes I know escorts do use fake pics, so he becomes a bit harder to decipher...

I guess there is really NO fool-proof way to get what you are looking for. The proof will be in your "initial try with the guy. One guys definition of "str8 actting" may not be YOUR definiton of the SAME....

[Jaker27]

Well, for one, how else do you suggest I find an escort who does not shriek "girl friend" at me, who does not use a lot of flamboyant hand gestures, who does not always stand with one hip thrust out to the side, and so on? Do I list those kinds of thing in my search? Should an escort list those kinds of thing in his ad?

 

It's easy for you, jj. All you need to say is, "ISO huge cock." :p

 

Isn't there some efficient way to describe what I am looking for or what an escort offers? Rick wants me/us not to use "straight-acting." I'm OK with that, but "straight-acting" is a term that I need a substitute for. I think that Rick suggests "masculine," but I'm not sure yet. I'm open to other suggestions.

 

Come on, guys, don't act as if you don't know what I'm trying to get at. (I don't mean just you, jj; I mean forum readers in general.) BTW, I don't think this is a frivolous question. I/We need an acceptable substitute for "straight-acting," IMO, and I'd like to know what it is.

Times have changed and maybe you should too. It's no longer butch, swishy, straight acting or whatever you still call it. "Straight acting" is such ghetto BS. I want someone who's masculine and confident and doesn't have to pretend to be anything but themselves. Players and actors need not apply. Btw. you never hear anyone looking for someone "gay acting". Wonder why that is?

[jjkrkwood]

Times have changed and maybe you should too. It's no longer butch, swishy, straight acting or whatever you still call it. "Straight acting" is such ghetto BS. I want someone who's masculine and confident and doesn't have to pretend to be anything but themselves. Players and actors need not apply. Btw. you never hear anyone looking for someone "gay acting". Wonder why that is?

 

Because then I would be the ONLY option, and how depressing is that for them ???

[Rick Munroe]

It's just that whenever I read one of your posts on the topic, I keep waiting for you to suggest an alternative, and I haven't seen one yet.

 

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that every single time the issue has been brought up, I have suggested the word "masculine."

 

Rick, PLEASE dont take the word QUEEN away from me. It took me so long to get that Title ! :o

 

NEVER!! All hail QUEEN JJ, MISTRESS of the RIM SEAT and DUCHESS of GLORYHOLIS.

 

Well, for one, how else do you suggest I find an escort who does not shriek "girl friend" at me, who does not use a lot of flamboyant hand gestures, who does not always stand with one hip thrust out to the side, and so on?

 

Jerry, it's not 1952 anymore. Being born gay does not mean someone does any of the above any more than being born black means someone speaks ebonics or being born Jewish means someone knows how to get a cheap deal on a gold necklace. My suggestion would be to call the person in question and figure out if he has the attributes you're looking for. (Btw, do you consider yourself "straight acting," according to the definition you've just set?)

 

As for "straight actting", i am not really sure WHAT that is anymore, since I know alot of guys that are truly str8 (at least to my knowledge) and seem much MORE gay than me.

 

Exactly! That's the point I've made numerous times. My gaydar stopped working a long time ago, because you just can't tell anymore, whether it's by actions or appearance. There are so many gay slobs and bears (the old stereotype of a straight guy) and so many straight guys who are quite prissy and fashion-obsessed (the old gay stereotype).

 

Btw. you never hear anyone looking for someone "gay acting". Wonder why that is?

 

Actually, a lot of straight women look for that, but they never put it in those exact words (or maybe they do!). They want a guy who's very well groomed, eyebrows tweezed, perfumed, body hair removed, pubes trimmed, clothes color coordinated, soft, gentle, emotional, etc etc...all of the old outdated stereotypes of gay guys from the last century. But yeah, you don't find many/any gay guys seeking "gay acting" guys because for them, it's still a negative thing to be gay. Just like it's still OK to refer to women as guys ("How are you guys doing?") but it's still an insult to refer to men as girls. But I think that's a generational thing and thankfully, changing (at least on the gay/straight front).

[Rick Munroe]

Sorry, but i don't understand why you would have a problem with the phrase 'openly gay'? What is your preferred term for espressing that someone is no longer hiding their sexuality?

 

Do you ever see anyone referred to as "openly straight" or "openly black" or "openly Jewish"? It implies that there is something wrong with being gay and that there is something to hide. What's wrong with just "gay"? If someone's in the closet, then theoretically, nobody knows they're gay. So, if they're not hiding it, then they're "gay."

[jjkrkwood]

do you ever anyone referred to as "openly straight" or "openly black" or "openly jewish"? It implies that there is something wrong with being gay and that there is something to hide. What's wrong with just "gay"? If someone's in the closet, then theoretically, nobody knows they're gay. So, if they're not hiding it, then they're "gay."

 

duh !!!!!!!!

[seeker630]

Do you ever see anyone referred to as "openly straight" or "openly black" or "openly Jewish"? It implies that there is something wrong with being gay and that there is something to hide. What's wrong with just "gay"? If someone's in the closet, then theoretically, nobody knows they're gay. So, if they're not hiding it, then they're "gay."

 

Obviously opinions differ, but just because no one KNOWS you're gay doesn't make you NOT gay, in my terms of reference. Nothing is 'wrong' with using the word 'gay' without descriptors, but I think 'openly gay' conveys more information than simply 'gay'. I see no reason to take offense at it, nor do i think it implies people SHOULD hide it - but we know that some people DO, and 'openly gay' differentiates those who DON'T.

[jjkrkwood]

Usually the people hiding in the closet are the only one that THINK noone knows they are Gay. Everyone else probably knows but choose not to address it.

 

Glitter and be GAY ! Happy Gay Pride month to ALL

[Rick Munroe]

just because no one KNOWS you're gay doesn't make you NOT gay

 

That's a totally different argument.

 

I think 'openly gay' conveys more information than simply 'gay'. I see no reason to take offense at it.

 

So you see nothing wrong with "openly black" or "openly Jewish" or "openly Christian" or "openly Italian" or "openly Democrat," etc? Can you see why a black person would take offense to being referred to as "openly black"?

 

but we know that some people DO, and 'openly gay' differentiates those who DON'T.

 

If someone's closeted, then like I said, you theoretically don't know their orientation, so what descriptor do you use for them? Or are we divided into "openly gay" and "unknown"? And do you ever refer to someone as "openly straight"?

 

P.S. I was originally making a joke. I really didn't want or intend to get into this whole topic all over again, so apologies to anyone who's thinking they've seen this all in the archives already!

[jjkrkwood]

P.S. I was originally making a joke. I really didn't want or intend to get into this whole topic all over again, so apologies to anyone who's thinking they've seen this all in the archives already!

 

I am highly offended and extremely annoyed.

[seeker630]

That's a totally different argument.

 

 

 

So you see nothing wrong with "openly black" or "openly Jewish" or "openly Christian" or "openly Italian" or "openly Democrat," etc? Can you see why a black person would take offense to being referred to as "openly black"?

 

I don't think that's a valid comparison. To me 'openly' isn't about 'obviousness', it's about not hiding.

 

If someone's closeted, then like I said, you theoretically don't know their orientation, so what descriptor do you use for them? Or are we divided into "openly gay" and "unknown"? And do you ever refer to someone as "openly straight"?

 

P.S. I was originally making a joke. I really didn't want or intend to get into this whole topic all over again, so apologies to anyone who's thinking they've seen this all in the archives already!

 

If we don't know they're gay, then we're not going to describe them as gay at all, with or without any descriptors.

 

I don't refer to anyone as 'openly straight' because I've never needed to differentiate anyone from the closeted straights.

 

(Actually, I'm not sure I've ever used the phrase 'openly gay' either - I'd say 'out'. I just didn't/don't understand your feeling that it's a phrase that somehow insults or demeans.)

[Rick Munroe]

To me 'openly' isn't about 'obviousness', it's about not hiding.

 

Exactly. The word "openly" implies that there is something to hide, that there is something inherently bad about being gay so we need to qualify those who are out as being "openly gay" as if that were some courageous act on the person's part.

 

If we don't know they're gay, then we're not going to describe them as gay at all, with or without any descriptors.

 

So then why the need for extra descriptors when you do know? That's my whole point. If you know they're gay, they're gay. "Openly" has a negative connotation. Maybe this is just the wrong website for this discussion.

[jjkrkwood]

I say we decide this with some Mud Wrestling !

[rguer]

I'll take the one in the plaid. He's gay enough.

 

[jjkrkwood]

I'll take the one in the plaid. He's gay enough.

 

 

Thats was quite Enjoyable and Fun, and just about says it ALL..

[BostonPhil]

I want the love interest in the cardigan

[Rick Munroe]

In the description, it says

We are ONE DIRECTION FANS! This is not intended to be negative towards the band! We DO NOT THINK THEY ARE GAY!

Why would it be negative to think they are gay?

[jjkrkwood]

In the description, it says Why would it be negative to think they are gay?

 

I think they meant the band might be offended at being spoofed as Homo, and may feel it was being insinuated that they were gay, which some people STILL do look down upon. ?

[gp0560]

Rick in the thread about sucking straight guys (how does he know they are straight?) said, "He does look very Long Island." Hmm. Sounds like a label to me, a convenient term for designating a group of (presumably) widely known behaviors.

 

Maybe there's an important distinction between "looking Long Island" and "looking gay" that I don't understand. Can anyone clarify for me?

[desertguy1954]

I also found "straight acting" offensive. In any ad I have every read, if it states straight acting, they have lost my interest. I am a gay man and that should be enough said.