What should i do...

[Guest spendlove]

>most cultures consider family relationships

>far more important than others.

> That is a very

>simple point and one which

>I believe to be beyond

>dispute. I see nothing

>in any of your posts

>that refutes it.

 

 

I agree with that. I think the idea that parents or relatives are guilty if they don't give their blessing to whatever the child wants to do is a Western one and not even accepted in many parts of the West either. In many cultures the duty runs from the child to the parent and not the other way. And I don't think it makes any sense to say that one should ignore one's culture because it is not accepting of the Western version of the "gay lifestyle." The West is not the whole world, although people there often act as though they think it is.

[Guest jordan steele]

Tell him the truth about how you feel and be nice about it but be honest.....

 

I know you are asking for direction on give or not give but being honest with yourself and him will give you your answer

 

Jordan

[Guest]

>I don't agree with your characterization

>of your remarks. Like

>delhi, I don't think what

>you said about the way

>other cultures regard same-sex relationships

>or sex workers has anything

>to do with the point

>he made, which is that

>most cultures consider family relationships

>far more important than others.

 

I agree (as I said) that most cultures place more emphasis on "family values" than modern western culture. My point was that just because most cultures do something one way doesn't mean it's morally superior, or even that it makes sense.

 

> That is a very

>simple point and one which

>I believe to be beyond

>dispute. I see nothing

>in any of your posts

>that refutes it. And

>he said nothing about "blindly

>following" anything. His advice

>was that the thread author

>should help his relative IF

>he believes that the man

>genuinely wants a reconciliation.

 

I don't disagree with the original posting that BigA should help his brother if the brother genuinely wanted a reconciliation (although I think it was quite obvious that was not the brother's goal). The posting I responded to (if you'll thread back) was the statement that Beware of Nick was "incredibly presumptuous" and that helping the brother would be in keeping with the beliefs of most cultures. Although most cultures do put more of an emphasis on "traditional family values" (and I could go on about what that usually means), I don't think most people would make a large sacrifice for someone who wished him and his lover dead, family or not.

 

>Frankly I don't see how

>anyone can argue with that.

 

>

>>>>You're wrong again on this one,

>>>>Professor Sherlock Holmes.

>

>Is it really necessary to be

>so nasty?

>

No, but neither was it necessary to imply that my views came from traumatic experiences with my family. If someone insults me, I'm going to respond. He insults "Beware of Nick" for perhaps jumping to conclusions (although I don't think it was difficult to see what the brother was up to), then he thinks it's OK to post his own conclusions about my past, with even less evidence.

 

>As for the number of people

>who objected to your remarks,

>I think he's counting what

>Joey C. said as well.

> And you can count

>me in that group too.

> Is that enough to

>make "several"?

 

Unless he had a time machine, no.

[Guest biga]

Evening all,just a very quick update if anyones interested ,the cheques have gone out to my family who were owed money by my brother so everything should hopefully get back to normal !,the upside of this all is that the rest of my brothers and my sister have been in contact with each other more in the last few days than in the last couple of years and relationships are i think gonna be better than before so something positive has come out of it all. thank you for all ther messages and wise words i do appreciate it BIG A (ANDY) LONDON

[Barry]

Good news.....glad everything worked out for the best Andy.